Mei Wanying was rescued in time, but she still caught a chill. Lying in bed, she looked listless and drained, unable to summon any energy.
The kitchen sent over a freshly stewed fish soup, but she did not touch a single sip.
Even when Dingxiang told her that Pei Yan had specially sent it over, Mei Wanying did not brighten up.
Instead, she became even more resistant.
She ordered that nothing related to Pei Yan be brought before her again.
She was still ill. Who would dare disobey her?
Madam Mei had the fish soup removed.
The cheerful and innocent girl had been worn down by the matter of marriage until all vitality seemed to have left her.
Watching her, Madam Mei felt as though needles were stabbing her heart.
For the first time, she truly regretted everything.
She should never have pushed her daughter forward.
She should never have tried to force Pei Yan into compromise through such means.
It had been a foolish plan.
Wanying had paid a tremendous price.
As for Pei Yan…
Madam Mei finally understood.
Even if he married Wanying, he would never give her a happy life.
He had said it himself.
He hated being manipulated.
And he had meant every word.
He would definitely retaliate.
Given Pei Yan’s status, his future household would never lack women.
Without her father’s protection and already rejected by Pei Yan, entering Prince Chen’s Manor might not be much different from entering the Eastern Palace.
Even the Empress would likely be displeased with her.
Perhaps she would make things difficult for her.
The more Madam Mei thought about it, the more she regretted everything.
How could she have been so foolish?
How could she have switched Pei Yan’s wine for the strongest vintage and then sent Wanying to deliver the hangover soup?
Holding her daughter’s hand, Madam Mei apologized.
“Mother was wrong. I won’t force you anymore. Don’t ever do something foolish again. If anything happens to you, Mother won’t be able to go on living either.”
As she spoke, tears streamed down her face.
She had never imagined that Wanying would resist marrying Pei Yan so fiercely.
After all, her greatest wish used to be spending her life with him.
If Wanying had never liked Pei Yan, Madam Mei would never have encouraged the match.
But now, there was no point saying any of that.
She no longer dared pressure her daughter.
She could not bear to see that lifeless expression on her face.
It felt like her heart was being carved apart.
Mei Wanying remained silent.
Leaning against the headboard, her eyes were lowered as though lost in thought.
Madam Mei opened her mouth but ultimately only sighed.
“The Crown Prince may have encountered some urgent matter. The steward said he left in a hurry and looked quite troubled. That boating trip probably won’t happen. Don’t worry about it. Focus on recovering.”
At last, Mei Wanying reacted.
“Mother, I want to enter the palace and see Her Majesty the Empress.”
Madam Mei hesitated.
“Mother has already gone to ask the Empress for help before, but Her Majesty refused.”
A faint smile appeared on Mei Wanying’s lips.
“She’ll agree.”
Because what they sought was different.
Her mother wanted an imperial marriage decree.
She wanted Pei Yan to shelter and protect her for the rest of her life.
But Mei Wanying wanted only one thing:
To leave the capital.
As long as the Crown Prince stopped pursuing her, the world was vast enough for her to find a place to belong.
Strictly speaking, she could simply leave now.
But she knew the Crown Prince’s character.
If she ran today, he would drag her back tomorrow.
Only if someone from the palace openly expressed support and restrained him could she leave peacefully.
As for whether the Crown Prince would become even more determined to trouble her afterward, she no longer wished to think about it.
When soldiers came, she would meet them with weapons.
When floodwaters rose, she would build embankments.
Worrying endlessly only exhausted herself.
As long as Mei Wanying focused on recovering, Madam Mei was willing to agree to anything.
“Recover first. Then Mother will submit a request to the palace. For your father’s sake, the Empress won’t refuse to see you.”
Mei Wanying nodded.
After thinking through many things, her illness remained, but her spirit had improved considerably.
Madam Mei quietly breathed a sigh of relief.
She instructed Dingxiang to bring over a bowl of freshly stewed pigeon soup.
“This soup drives out the cold. Drink a little.”
Afraid she might refuse, she quickly added,
“A-Yan only sent fish.”
Mei Wanying merely nodded.
She said nothing more.
Once, she had loved Pei Yan deeply.
Now, she wanted nothing more than to draw a clear line between them.
Anything connected to him—
She wanted no part of it.
Madam Mei wanted to feed her personally, but Mei Wanying shook her head.
“Mother, you should go back and rest.”
Madam Mei felt uneasy.
She could not tell whether her daughter was blaming her or simply worried about her health.
Liu Mama quickly took the bowl.
“Miss Ying is filial and doesn’t want to tire you out. I’ll feed her. You can stay and chat with her for a while. Once she’s finished, we’ll return to the main courtyard and let her rest properly.”
Before Madam Mei could sink into sadness, Liu Mama had already dispersed the mood.
Only after Mei Wanying finished both her medicine and soup did Madam Mei and Liu Mama finally leave.
“Dingxiang.”
“Miss.”
Dingxiang hurried over, following Mei Wanying’s gaze toward the dressing table.
“What do you need?”
“The box.”
Dingxiang immediately understood.
There was a wooden box there—her mistress’s most treasured possession.
Inside was the coming-of-age gift Pei Yan had given her.
Though she did not know why Mei Wanying wanted it, she fetched it immediately.
The box was carved from precious huanghuali wood.
When opened, it revealed an exquisite golden hairpin.
With slender fingers, Mei Wanying gently lifted it.
Her expression grew distant.
Her other hand unconsciously touched her neck.
Her pulse still beat steadily beneath her skin.
She was alive.
The pain from her previous life had been real.
Being Pei Yan’s wife had hurt.
Being captured by enemies and forced to take her own life to preserve her honor and avoid burdening him had hurt even more.
Memories surged through her mind.
Her heart twisted painfully.
Even breathing became difficult.
After a long time, she shut the box with a decisive snap.
Then she stood up and headed outside with it in her hands.
Dingxiang hurried after her with a cloak.
“Miss, where are you going?”
Mei Wanying did not answer.
She left the courtyard and headed toward the garden.
Her eyesight worsened after dusk.
Even with lanterns lighting the way, she stumbled.
The box slipped from her hands and fell.
She picked it up again.
The treasured object she once cherished above all else was now stained with dirt, yet she paid it no mind.
At the rear garden lay a larger lotus pond stocked with koi.
A pavilion stood beside the water.
Willows lined the shore.
By day it was picturesque.
At night it felt cold and lonely.
Dingxiang held tightly onto Mei Wanying’s arm, afraid she might jump into the water again.
Instead, Mei Wanying walked to the edge of the pond and, without hesitation, threw the box into the water.
Then she turned around and began walking back.
Dingxiang stared in shock.
With a soft splash, the box disappeared beneath the surface.
“Miss… that was His Highness’s gift…”
Mei Wanying gave a faint, self-mocking smile.
“The coming-of-age gift—I don’t want it anymore.”
Then she paused.
“Neither do I want him.”
Pei Yan had never belonged to her.
Whether she wanted him or not…
Perhaps no one had ever cared.