I looked over my status screen again after work, trying not to sigh. It showed my name, Shutarou Hanaoka, age 39, with a job as a regular office worker. My mind stat was 59 thanks to all the books I read, but everything else sat under the average line of 50. Back in my twenties, some numbers were higher, but once I passed 30, they began to fall. I guess this is what people call getting old.
Of course, I had 0 in every magic stat. I was no magician at all.
I went back home like always, ate a onvenience store dinner, and dropped onto the sofa. "Ah... tomorrow I'll be 40. Being single at 40 is tough," I said to the empty room.
No one at my company over 40 was still single except me. I must be super rare. Maybe even SSR rank. If I add the fact I'm still a virgin, then maybe LR rank. Sometimes I even think I'm the only one like this in the whole world, though that's going too far. Still, it isn't common, and that thought hurts.
It feels like nothing will change even when I reach 50. I will still sit alone in this small room, eating onvenience store dinners. I once thought about going to "a shop like that," but after so many years with a careful mind, I never had the courage to open a new door. Now, I don't even have the energy to try.
I spent the evening with a can of chuhai (canned cocktail) in one hand while I watched TV. I was off work tomorrow, so I planned to stay up late. "Already this late? Happy birthday to me. 40 years old. Not that it's something to celebrate... haah." Only a heavy sigh came out.
Even after all these years, birthdays still felt empty. I had not been happy about one in decades. Birthdays, Christmas, Valentine's... Why are there so many events in this world? None of them ever crossed into my life—40, single, virgin, no girlfriend. These events felt like something from another world, and that lonely thought made the drink go down faster.
Lately, I drink more on event days. Last Christmas, I tried to make it feel a bit festive and bought champagne. The shop clerk handed it to me with a smile, saying, "You will drink this with your wife, right?" I lied and said, "Well, something like that." I shouldn't try things that don't fit me. My usual chuhai is enough.
My recent hobby was drinking chuhai in my room while watching old tokusatsu hero (live-action hero) shows I loved as a kid. In those moments, I forgot about work and felt like I was that boy again. Even someone like me could feel like a hero who saved people.
My favorite was Mobyaa, a local hero from Okinawa. It was so strange that I got hooked at once. Season one was the best. His dog partner was simply too good. In modern words, he was like a fluffy beast-man sidekick. In real words, he was just an old guy in a dog suit. It got me good. When I imagined myself with that weird dog, beating evil monsters, my heart lifted.
Maybe some tiny part of that hero dream stayed with me. Even now, if I saw someone in trouble, I tried to help. I gave up seats to older people, and once, long ago, I even helped a girl who was bothered by some rough teens. They punched me hard, but she got away safe, so for me that was a win.
Another time, I helped a girl who was about to be attacked by a dog. I pulled the dog's attention away, but then it chased me. It was faster, and the suit I had just bought was ruined. It hurt a lot, but thanks to my rabies and tetanus shots, I was safe.
I even had one real "hero moment." I saw a car crash right in front of me. One car caught fire. The driver was out cold, and a girl in the seat beside him was frozen with fear. I thought of the fire spreading, but my body moved on its own. I pulled the door open, got the girl out, and then dragged the driver out too. An ambulance took them both soon after, so I think they were okay.
Looking back, I did some pretty wild things in real life. Maybe I watched too many hero shows. Now that I was turning 40, I told myself I should stop doing things that didn't fit my age.
Thinking about my past actions, I felt warm from the alcohol. I had planned to stay up later, but it felt nicer to go to bed while still in a good mood. I fell asleep soon, helped by the lonely-event drinking.