By the time she got home, the sky was already light.
Xin Huohuo had just seen the first ray of sunlight flash across the horizon when Bai Qi and Mr.
Hei suddenly vanished, abandoning her halfway home.
When she finally arrived, she saw the kitten and puppy already padding around the room.
It was only then that she truly believed they automatically returned to their chosen physical forms each day.
The whole situation was as exasperating as it was bizarre.
Once they were a cat and a dog, communication was impossible.
Xin Huohuo had no choice but to resign herself to her morning shift.
Afterward, she cooked a meal, and once they’d all eaten, they each went straight to sleep.
She had been so exhausted over the past two days that she was utterly drained, mentally and physically.
As for the two gods?
No matter how immense their spiritual power, their physical forms were still just a kitten and a puppy.
They needed a great deal of rest every day, or their small bodies couldn’t handle it.
Thankfully, they were only out of their bodies for half the day, so their fluffy little forms weren’t too negatively affected, aside from their growth being incredibly slow.
She slept straight through until the sky was completely dark.
When she opened her eyes, she was met with a handsome face hovering right above her, a long ponytail dangling down the side and tickling her cheek.
“We need to set some ground rules.” Xin Huohuo squeezed her eyes shut.
She wanted to just die.
“Alright, go ahead,” Bai Qi said with a grin.
“I can’t get up until you move.” Xin Huohuo gave him a shove, then sat up and checked herself over.
Thankfully, her pajamas hadn’t gotten twisted or ridden up.
She’d even kept the sheet pulled over her stomach.
It made her a bit hot, but even in her sleep, she hadn’t forgotten to remind herself to maintain some dignity.
“You’re men—no, male gods—but I’m a young woman.
My place is tiny; inside and out, it’s just this one room.
And your physical forms are too weak to be left outside.
So, can we please set up a boundary?
Hang a curtain or something, a line you can’t cross.
And no more listening in on my phone calls, or rummaging through my things, or…”
“Why?
What in the mortal world could possibly stop us?” Bai Qi shrugged.
“We can,” Mr.
Hei interjected.
He was sitting on the sofa with his back to the bed.
“Have you ever heard of ‘maintaining a respectful distance between men and women’?” Xin Huohuo glared at the unconcerned Bai Qi.
“I know this is the modern age, but I am not okay with doing everything under the constant watch of two men!”
She used to sleep sprawled out in every direction, but now she had to be prim and proper.
With two part-man, part-beast ghost emissaries who called themselves proper gods just appearing out of thin air, she hadn’t just lost her normal, ordinary life—she’d lost her freedom as a woman.
“You should feel honored to be watched over by a god,” Bai Qi said cheekily.
“Besides, watching you sleep is pretty entertaining.
You even smack your lips.
Dreaming of something delicious?
You also talk in your sleep.
I heard you yell…”
“I know you’ve existed for a long, long time—since the first year there were dogs, probably,” Xin Huohuo snapped, slapping the bed and cutting him off.
“But you should try to keep up with the times, don’t you think?
Modern people are very particular about one word: Privacy!
And two more words: Respect privacy!
Got it?
Human beings need their personal space!”
“Instead of setting ground rules, why not just buy a house?” Bai Qi shrugged.
“The aura here isn’t bad—it’s quite righteous, and the yang energy effectively blocks out yin creatures, making it a rare find—but it’s just too inconvenient.
And let me be clear, I have a grand estate to live in back in the Netherworld.
You can’t just kick me out, or I’ll get nasty.”
‘It was plenty convenient when I lived alone.
I could even set up a tub in here and take a bath!’ Xin Huohuo thought.
But what she said out loud was a different kind of truth.
“I’d love to provide you with a proper place, but I don’t have that kind of money!
Do you have any idea how much a house costs per square foot in a big city like this?
Even a tiny, remote place on the edge of the suburbs would require an entire family’s savings just for the down payment.
I’m all alone.
Where am I supposed to get that much money?
And who would even want to buy this place if I tried to sell it to raise funds?
I’m better off just waiting for it to be demolished so I can get a big payout from the government.”
“What about renting a bigger place, then?” Bai Qi suggested.
“A big house in a good location would have sky-high rent!
I’d rather save that money for a down payment.” There was another half of the sentence that Xin Huohuo left unsaid.
‘Besides, you two don’t earn a living, but you still expect to eat and drink well.
That costs money too, you know?’
“So that’s why you’re so obsessed with money?”
“That’s exactly why I’m so obsessed with money!” Xin Huohuo suddenly sounded deflated.
“My family only left me this one apartment.
I want to move, even if it’s to somewhere smaller or more remote.
But I have the worst luck.
Every time I get close to saving enough, something is guaranteed to happen that forces me to spend it all.
As a result, after all these years, the more I save, the further housing prices pull away from me.”
“You scrimp and save, working multiple jobs, never going out, not even dating… for a girl, that’s a little twisted,” Bai Qi said, patting her head sympathetically.
Xin Huohuo had the urge to swat his elegant hand away.
‘That’s right.
She worked so hard, she tried so hard, and for what?
For two self-proclaimed gods to just show up, turn her life upside down, and not even offer to predict some winning lottery numbers for her.’
‘So much for their principles!
Where were those principles when they were draining her finances?
What was this?
Forced patronage!
Could anyone’s life be more miserable than hers?
Every time she managed to find a stretch of peace—even if it was a difficult peace—it would inevitably be shattered.’
“I know of a house that will be exceptionally cheap,” Mr.
Hei, who had been silent the whole time, suddenly said.
He turned around, no longer showing her his back.
“You won’t need to sell this place.
We can even use a small, harmless little Spell to help you buy it for an unbelievably low price.”
“For real?
Where is it?!” The good news was so sudden that Xin Huohuo was too stunned to even process her excitement.
“In a few days.
The time isn’t right yet.”
Mr.
Hei was always so profound and inscrutable, wearing an expression that said he was guarding some great celestial secret.
Xin Huohuo wanted to press him for details, but Bai Qi cut in with a question.
“Using a Spell to interfere with a mortal transaction… won’t that cost us merit?”
“Pfft.
The Yellow Springs Road is gone.
Who’s left to keep track of your merit points?” Xin Huohuo quickly jumped in, afraid Bai Qi’s question might make Mr.
Hei change his mind.
Thankfully, Mr.
Hei didn’t waver.
But he did stand up, coming to stand beside Bai Qi.
Together, they looked down at Miss Xin, who was sitting cross-legged on the bed with her hair a mess and her eyes still bleary with sleep.
“If you want me to help you get this cheap house, you must first buy a car!
That is the condition.
A non-negotiable condition!”
“I knew there was no such thing as a free lunch!” Xin Huohuo protested after a moment of stunned silence.
“But why do you want me to buy a car?
Don’t you guys teleport?
You don’t need a vehicle.”
“But you do,” Mr.
Hei said bluntly.
“There are some places we need you to take us, and besides, you’re the only one who can operate a cell phone.
Think about last night.
If you hadn’t been so slow, we could have investigated much more.”