Ying Qiuman had nothing to say. Since the susceptibility period hadn’t fully arrived yet, there was no real need for him at the moment, so why not just tell him not to come back at all?
“I’m not an omega,” Ying Qiuman muttered, turning his face away. “Is holding me like this even useful?”
He heard Xu Shuyuan laugh softly, and then felt the tip of the other man’s nose brush against his gland.
“Be quiet.”
Ying Qiuman was a bit angry now. Clearly it was Xu Shuyuan who… He couldn’t quite put it into words, but he knew it was also something he himself wanted. Ever since they’d had intimate contact, the plushie’s effect on relieving his symptoms had grown more and more minimal.
In the end, he shut his mouth in embarrassment and frustration, then carefully leaned back, pressing as much of his back as he could against Xu Shuyuan’s chest.
Although Xu Shuyuan was much taller and bigger than him, this kind of embrace didn’t feel cramped. Still, Ying Qiuman wasn’t used to it. Or rather, he was a bit extreme about it: instead of being held from behind, he preferred being hugged fully from the front.
He endured the skin hunger and sat there quietly.
“It’s probably not good for me to see your contract. I’ll head back first…” Remembering the original novel’s plot, he suddenly shivered.
But just as he was about to stand up, Xu Shuyuan tightened his arm around his waist, pressing him back into his embrace, his breath brushing against the back of Ying Qiuman’s neck.
“It’s fine, I’ll be done reading soon,” Xu Shuyuan said, rubbing his waist and stomach a couple of times, as if to soothe him.
Ying Qiuman let out a breath through his nose. This was the most obvious display of anger he could manage.
After receiving this almost coquettish signal, Xu Shuyuan pressed his lips lightly against Ying Qiuman’s gland, and the speed at which he flipped through the contract seemed to pick up a bit.
If he were an omega, would Xu Shuyuan still be this composed with him in his arms?
Ying Qiuman felt utterly conflicted. He couldn’t leave, even though part of him wanted to, yet turning around and pulling Xu Shuyuan into a proper embrace was something he couldn’t quite bring himself to do either. It was like riding a tiger and being unable to get off [1] once you start, you’re trapped and can’t safely stop jQuery('#footnote_plugin_tooltip_2564675_1_1').tooltip({ tip: '#footnote_plugin_tooltip_text_2564675_1_1', tipClass: 'footnote_tooltip', effect: 'fade', predelay: 0, fadeInSpeed: 200, delay: 400, fadeOutSpeed: 200, position: 'top center', relative: true, offset: [-7, 0], });, suspended awkwardly between longing and restraint.
Staring at the complex, difficult business documents, his eyes gradually grew heavy. Fortunately, even after he fell asleep, his center of gravity stayed steady. Only his head tilted slightly upward, resting against Xu Shuyuan’s shoulder, quiet as a finely crafted porcelain figurine.
After finishing the contract, Xu Shuyuan sent a message to his assistant, then looked at the sleeping Ying Qiuman for a while.
His face was turned the other way, leaving only half of his profile visible. The sharp, gaunt lines of his jaw from when they first met had softened and filled out a little, giving him a gentler, more youthful look.
A few minutes later, hardly knowing what he was thinking, Xu Shuyuan carefully closed the laptop and stood up, meaning to carry him to the bed.
But almost the instant Xu Shuyuan moved, Ying Qiuman woke up with a start. His eyes were sleepy and a bit dazed as he looked up. Before he could react or speak, his mouth was sealed the next second.
By now it was probably already past eleven. With Xu Shuyuan’s habits, once things started, they wouldn’t end before two.
Ying Qiuman pushed at Xu Shuyuan somewhat angrily, but was forced to respond along with him.
This was too out of character. They didn’t usually kiss only occasionally, when emotions ran deep, would he get a kiss that felt more like comfort.
But this was already the second one today. That irresistible sense of invasion made Ying Qiuman retreat step by step, until he finally gave up resisting. At worst, he’d just cancel the plan and treat his roommate to a meal another day.
When the kiss left the back of his head tingling, Xu Shuyuan let him go. He even lifted Ying Qiuman’s legs off his waist, tucked them under the blanket, then pulled it snug around him, coaxing him as though soothing a child: “Get to sleep early.”
“…”
After kissing him into this state, and then telling him to sleep early?
Xu Shuyuan got up and went to the bathroom. Ying Qiuman kicked at the blanket, turned over, and wrapped himself up tightly in it.
When Xu Shuyuan finished and came back, all he saw on the bed was a lump. Leaning over, he found the other man facing away from him, only the top of his head sticking out.
“Don’t suffocate yourself.” He tugged at the blanket, only to realize the person was already asleep.
Xu Shuyuan sighed, lay down, and pulled him into his arms.
The next morning, Ying Qiuman’s 8 a.m. alarm wasn’t turned off in time. When he heard it and was about to get up, someone switched it off before him. Still groggy from waking, he paused for a moment, until the hand on his waist pulled him back into the embrace behind him.
His mind jolted awake as if from an electric shock. He turned over and looked at the man beside him.
Xu Shuyuan hadn’t opened his eyes. Normally, on workdays, he would wake even earlier to go exercise, but right now he was on leave for his susceptibility period and wanted to sleep a little longer.
“It’s only seven-thirty. There’s still time.”
That wasn’t the issue at all. After being pressed back under the covers by Xu Shuyuan, Ying Qiuman’s heart raced and wouldn’t settle.
The first time he’d slept beside Xu Shuyuan, he’d been tormented rather harshly, and instinctively wanted to cling to him. But after he woke, the other man had pushed him away and reminded him: “Don’t hold on to me while you sleep.”
So from that first accident before their marriage right up until now, after they were married, Ying Qiuman would always wake with a start once it was over, then return to his own room to hug a plushie and fall asleep.
After being rejected, he would immediately retreat. Even knowing he didn’t need to care too much about what others thought, he still couldn’t bring himself to confront anything or anyone head-on.
But last night, perhaps because he’d felt the other man was kissing too seriously, his subconscious had made him forget that he was supposed to pull back.
Judging from the sound of his voice, Xu Shuyuan probably hadn’t entered his susceptibility period yet. Ying Qiuman waited a while, and once he was sure Xu Shuyuan had fallen back asleep, he quietly moved the other man’s arm aside and slipped out from under the covers.
He gathered his things and left as quietly as he could. The moment the door closed, the man on the bed opened his eyes.
In the dim room, Xu Shuyuan’s gaze was unreadable, his emotions hidden.
Ying Qiuman returned to the bedroom to pack his things and get ready to go back to school. When he opened the wardrobe, he saw the half-his-height plush bear inside. A trace of warmth still lingered in it. He buried himself straight into the bear’s embrace, making up for the regret of a night where it felt like he’d held someone and yet hadn’t. After several deep breaths, he finally closed the wardrobe and left.
In mid-December, although it grew much warmer once the sun came out, a single gust of cool wind was enough to wake Ying Qiuman fully.
On his way out, he’d already sent a message to his friend. That guy was probably still asleep, it wasn’t until he reached school that he saw the reply.
【It’s over, you’ve fallen in love~】
The contact labeled “Xiao Yuan” was his childhood friend from his original world, named Qiu Yuan. When he’d transmigrated into this book, his contact information had inexplicably stayed saved in his phone, and he could still reach him.
It was absurd, but then, the fact that he’d transmigrated into a book was already absurd enough.
The catch was that the connection was tied to this phone. After switching to a new one, no matter how he saved the number, the other side would always be unreachable.
So Ying Qiuman had used this same phone for four years.
【No.】
Ying Qiuman stuffed his phone back into his pocket as if sulking, went to the library, and studied for two hours before checking it again.
【When you start noticing the little differences and they trouble and confuse you that’s the beginning of falling.】
Below it was a cheeky, eyebrow-waggling meme.
Ying Qiuman thought he was playing relationship expert again. Obviously the two of them had grown up together, and neither had any romantic experience.
【You have to factor in that I’m just attentive to detail.】
Qiu Yuan didn’t argue, only sent back a disdainful meme.
After eating, he went back to the dormitory to charge his phone. Ye Li had just gotten upand it was a good thing Ying Qiuman had come back at this hour.
When Ye Li had confessed to him before, Ying Qiuman had agonized over it for a long time. In the end, unable to find a reason to refuse, he’d brought up Xu Shuyuan.
Although his marriage to Xu Shuyuan was a contractual one, it worked well enough as grounds for rejection. Ye Li had been deeply shocked by it and showed him a great deal of sympathy.
“I’ve heard that alphas in their susceptibility period aren’t even human!” Ye Li wasn’t discouraged after his confession failed, so Ying Qiuman guessed that Ye Li didn’t actually like him and had only been testing him. Later, the two gradually became good friends.
After the exams, Xu Shuyuan didn’t send any messages to hurry him along. Because of what had happened the night before, Ying Qiuman felt inexplicably weighed down. So when his advisor invited him to dinner, he agreed after a few token refusals.
Only after arriving did he realize it was a dinner his advisor had arranged to bring in investors for his project.
“No need to be nervous, they’re all friends of mine!” His advisor, Wei Boju, felt that Ying Qiuman had real academic ability but was a bit quiet and reserved. He meant to introduce him to more people and expand the project.
Ying Qiuman had attended plenty of these dinners before. He had good looks and could hold his liquor, so his superior had “valued” him for it.
But later, because he needed to take medication for his psychological issues, after he refused several times, his superior began using various excuses to halt his projects.
This made Ying Qiuman’s condition worse, and he began to develop fear of and resistance toward such dinner gatherings.
“Teacher Wei, things at my home…” Ying Qiuman wanted to refuse, but Wei Boju frowned, tilted his head, and looked at him with a deliberately pitiful expression: “Xiao Man, you wouldn’t even keep me company for a meal?”
He couldn’t refuse people, especially those who treated him well. Although Wei Boju was his teacher, their usual interactions were closer to those between friends.
Ying Qiuman lowered his head and hesitated. His phone still hadn’t received any message from Xu Shuyuan. By every measure, subjective and objective, he had no reason to refuse, so he could only agree.
He followed Wei Boju as the host, sitting beside the main seat. Most of the guests who came in were dressed in suits and leather shoes, and Wei Boju dealt with them. Now and then, when someone asked about him, he only had to give a brief self-introduction.
Once most of the guests had settled in, Ying Qiuman was about to flag down a waiter, but Wei Boju stopped him with a raised hand. “We’re still waiting on one more.” A short while later, the door opened. When Xu Shuyuan walked in, Ying Qiuman’s mind went blank.
“There’s still one important person who hasn’t arrived,” Wei Boju said. Worried this might make him nervous, he added, “He and I get along very well, so there’s no need to be afraid!”
Hearing this, Ying Qiuman glanced at the empty seat on the other side of Wei Boju and guessed it was reserved for that important person. So he nodded and sat back down.
Most of the people at the table knew one another and fell into conversation.
A short while later, the important person arrived.
When Xu Shuyuan appeared, Ying Qiuman’s mind went blank for a moment. He couldn’t tell whether it was surprise or guilt. He shot the man with a quick glance, then dropped his head, only speaking when Wei Boju introduced him.
“I came with Teacher Wei. I, I’m Ying Qiuman.” He stammered through the introduction, certain it came out wrong no matter how he phrased it. In the end, Wei Boju smoothed over the awkwardness for him.
Wei Boju sat between the two of them, but out of the corner of his eye Ying Qiuman kept stealing glances at the man on that side, someone impossible to ignore.
There wasn’t much business discussed at the table, most of it was conversation among friends. Ying Qiuman drank a few glasses for form’s sake, but he’d overlooked the fact that this body wasn’t his original one. After a few drinks, he started to feel a bit dizzy.
At some point, the topic shifted to Ying Qiuman’s research project. Once he understood why Wei Boju had brought him to the dinner, he’d already drafted a speech in his head. But after Xu Shuyuan arrived, he forgot every word of it.
He forced himself to hold steady. Still looking reasonably clear-headed, he stood up, recalled his project, and drawing on his experience improvising on the spot many times before spoke confidently about its development prospects.
When asked about returns on investment, his mind stalled for a moment. This went beyond what he actually knew, but the alcohol also made him less timid. Relying on figures he remembered seeing before, he smiled and replied, “The market research has a certain time sensitivity to it, but going by past statistics, the trend is generally upward. I believe the product will see a good return.”
He answered everyone’s questions calmly, and finally turned his head with a flicker of expectation to look at Xu Shuyuan.
But Xu Shuyuan didn’t seem inclined to ask anything. He merely raised his glass toward him, and Ying Qiuman, somewhat muddle-headed, returned the gesture with a drink.
Ying Qiuman could no longer make out the other man’s expression clearly, but he seemed to catch a faint snort near his ear, which instantly turned his earlobes red and left his whole body uneasy.
Seeing that something was off with him, Wei Boju reached out to steady him and asked quietly, “You all right? Your teacher’s wife is just outside want to go rest with her for a bit?”
Ying Qiuman wasn’t unfamiliar with the teacher’s wife, but leaving Xu Shuyuan’s line of sight right now, he instinctively felt the other man might get angry. After all, an alpha’s possessiveness during the susceptibility period was frightening, whether they were together by agreement or for some other reason.
“It’s fine, I—”
Wei Boju cut him off and raised a hand to explain to the table, “The kid can’t handle a few drinks. I’ll take him out to sober up first!”
Ying Qiuman felt weak all over as Wei Boju pulled him out. He glanced blankly back at Xu Shuyuan behind him, only to find that the man wasn’t looking at him at all, but was chatting with someone beside him, apparently in good spirits.
A sudden wave of disappointment rose in him. He followed Wei Boju out obediently. When the teacher’s wife took charge of him, she wanted to get a room where he could rest, but Ying Qiuman refused. Hugging his legs, he curled up on a sofa in the lobby, so quiet he might have fallen asleep.
“Keep an eye on him!” Ying Qiuman heard Wei Boju’s voice as he walked off, followed by the teacher’s wife scolding the teacher for drinking. After that, he couldn’t make out the words anymore.
He didn’t know how long he dozed in that muddled state, but vaguely he heard Xu Shuyuan’s voice: “Such a poor tolerance for alcohol?”
References[+]