“Block them!”
“Prepare for battle-!”
Fifteen or so soldiers came charging down the mountain like a pack of jackals. The wagon’s guards should have belonged to the same territory as them. Setting aside my question of why they weren’t startled to see their own allies attacking, the raiders rushed toward the freight wagons loaded with supplies.
CLANG, CLANG, CLANG.
In an instant, the sound of weapons colliding filled the mountain road. Strangely, the soldiers attacked only the wagon guards and the lord’s hired men. Not a single one approached us. That was when the mercenary captain opened his mouth.
“Hey, driver.”
“Yes?”
“If you run away without my permission, I’ll smash your head first, bandits or no bandits.”
The driver looked as though he’d aged another ten years on the spot.
“……Understood.”
After forcing an answer out of him, the captain issued another warning, then turned around.
“Let’s go make some money.”
“Yes!”
“I thought I’d die of boredom sitting in that wagon.”
I expected the mercenaries who climbed out of the wagon to charge straight at the soldiers who’d attacked us.
They didn’t.
They lined up in a row and simply watched the wagon guards fight the soldiers who had turned bandits.
The mercenary captain rested his mace on his shoulder and alternated between looking at the hill the soldiers had charged down from and the place where the guards were fighting.
“Argh!”
STAB.
The wagon guards must have been more skilled than I’d expected, because before long, they had killed every one of the bandit soldiers who’d rushed them.
WHIZZ—.
Then, without warning, several arrows shot through the air.
“Ghk!”
An arrow pierced a guard’s throat and lodged in a wooden crate, where it quivered violently.
“Whew. That’s brutal.”
Someone whistled in admiration even though a man had just died.
‘What the hell? Is he a psychopath?’
Yet none of the mercenaries standing beside me showed any particular change in expression as people died around them. A group soon appeared at the top of the hill. Every one of them was a soldier wearing quilted armor or a helmet.
The only difference was the red X painted across the crest of the family that ruled the territory.
No way.
They didn’t just drag me into this shitty game. They set the difficulty like this too?
“Hey!”
At some point, the captain of the guards had raised his shield to block the arrows. He shouted, his booming voice making my ears hurt.
“If you were hired for money, then help us!”
The mercenary captain raised one corner of his mouth.
“My lord, our contract only requires us to reach the territory. We were supposed to sign a separate contract for our next job at the lord’s castle.”
“What?! You crazy bastard.”
Rapid footsteps thundered down the slope.
Without so much as a shout or a curse, the soldiers on the hill began charging toward the wagons once again. A man in plate armor walked down behind them. At the sight, the guard captain shouted urgently.
“Join us! If you refuse, I’ll have you punished under military law!”
The mercenary captain replied with a sneer.
“We’re mercenaries. We don’t involve ourselves in work that isn’t part of a contract, my lord.”
“You money-crazed bastards.”
“I-I’ll hire you!”
A man who looked like an official stepped forward past the guard captain. His crooked hat and disheveled clothes seemed to display his desperation. The mercenary captain continued with a capitalist smile.
“How much will you pay for the job?”
He was asking them to name the price first in a desperate situation this desperate. The official’s face twisted before he raised a finger.
“…One Silver Coin per person.”
This time, the mercenary captain frowned.
“Get back in the wagon, boys.”
“Two Silver Coins!”
“Driver, get the wagon moving!”
“Three Silver Coins! I can’t go any higher!”
The soldiers had now made it all the way down the hill. The second group was different from the bandit soldiers who had come before them. The first group had looked like a bunch of reckless brats stuffed into uniforms, but the ones coming down now were different from the look in their eyes alone.
‘Those are some murderous eyes.’
SHING.
They each drew the one-handed sword hanging from their waist.
“Boys, let’s go make some money!”
The nine mercenaries charged at the soldiers who had turned bandits.
***
Crazy bastards. Every last one of them was insane. Every time a blade flashed, an arm or a leg went flying—or a life did. Yet at the mere promise of money, the mercenaries threw themselves at the blades with smiles on their faces, as though they were having fun.
A new opportunity?
That had all been complete fucking nonsense.
“Log out! Log out! If that doesn’t work, let me log in somewhere else!”
Fuck. If they were going to throw me into a game, the least they could do was let me log out. If that wasn’t possible, then at least let me log back into reality.
“Rookie, have your legs already gone weak? Hahaha!”
The huge blonde woman laughed as though mocking me, then charged forward. She swung the shield gripped in her left hand and sent the soldier blocking her path flying, then brought down the axe in her right hand.
CRUNCH.
The unpleasant sound of something bursting stabbed into my ears. At some point, three soldiers had begun climbing up from below the mountainside we had just ascended. They also had an X painted across their family crests.
Goddammit.
‘You think I’m just going to die like this?’
“……Fuck.”
I returned to the wagon and opened the bundle I’d been carrying. Even so, I couldn’t see anything that might serve as a weapon. All it held were cracked jars, each small enough to grip and throw with one hand.
Was the owner of this body insane?
I could’ve dismissed it as a game mechanic if I were still playing. But this was reality now! And he carried around nothing but jars without even a single dagger? If they at least looked intact or had any decent quality, I could’ve sold them.
Every single one was chipped or cracked—nothing but trash that couldn’t be sold as merchandise.
“Driver.”
The driver had been alternating between watching me and the battle from the moment I climbed onto the wagon. He responded immediately when I called him.
“Why don’t we run away together?”
“…Sorry, but I’m more afraid of that captain of yours than I am of you.”
Judging by his expression, he had no intention of running away with me. The soldiers walking up from below the slope had drawn close enough that I could make out their faces. I swallowed dryly at the swords and axes in their hands.
“Here.”
WHOOSH.
The driver tossed me something.
“……What is this?”
“If you don’t have a weapon, use that.”
What he gave me was a shield made by fastening several wooden planks together. In the game, it wouldn’t even have qualified as an item.
“If you give this to me, then what will you……?”
“Hm? What did you say?”
“N-Nothing.”
The driver had already pulled out and donned chainmail that covered both his head and upper body. Beside him lay a solid steel shield and a hand hammer. Apparently, he wasn’t an ordinary man either.
Still, if he was going to lend me something, he could’ve lent me the steel shield.
Now fully armed, the driver stepped forward to block the soldiers. I hid behind him. He had clearly been a head shorter than me, yet now his back looked several times larger than mine.
Whether he knew how I felt or not, the driver spoke to the soldiers.
“If we surrender here, will you let us live?”
“…….”
Even at his question, the soldiers merely glared at us with their mouths firmly shut.
SHING.
Instead, they each drew the gladius hanging from their waist. The driver clicked his tongue.
“Tsk.”
‘I’m fucked.’
If it had come to this….
“Send me off without pain…….”
SMASH.
A jar struck the forehead of the soldier who had opened his mouth. His body toppled backward. The remaining three turned their gazes toward me.
“If we’re going to fight anyway, we should strike first.”
“Huh. I suppose you really do belong to that mercenary company.”
“Haaap-!”
The remaining two soldiers charged at us.
“Whoa!”
I barely raised my shield in time to block the sword swinging at me. The blade came down over and over like a club, forcing me to retreat without pause.
These crazy bastards always attacked the tank in front of them first in the game!
Driver, pull the aggro properly!
“Driver!”
“Krgh.”
A soldier kicked the driver backward, shield and all, then planted a foot on his chest.
BAM! BAM! BAM!
The bastard fighting me seemed to think the weapon in his hand was an axe instead of a sword. Or maybe he thought I was nothing but a punching bag. He just kept swinging it at me.
‘This worked in the game.’
“You son of a bitch-!”
I charged at the bastard as he raised his sword high to bring it down.
“Urk.”
When I slammed into him off-beat, he gasped and stumbled backward before falling on his ass. Borrowing the game’s terminology, he seemed to have entered Stun.
“RAAAAH!”
SMASH—!
I brought a jar down on the head of the bastard sprawled on the ground. The jar struck the crown of his head dead center and shattered into pieces. Blood poured from him as he toppled backward.
“You fight like a rabid dog.”
“Woof, woof.”
I tried pretending to be a rabid dog, but the bastard merely frowned. He didn’t look frightened in the slightest.
Of course he wouldn’t be scared by something like that.
“Still, you didn’t kill our men, so I’ll send you off peacefully.”
Listen, if I didn’t kill them, you should be thinking about letting me live. Why the hell are you talking about sending me off peacefully?
Was everyone in this world a psychopath?
“Fuck.”
The bastard who had been watching my fight disabled the driver with a soccer kick to the face, then turned toward me. I raised the shield to cover my upper body and checked on the driver. I couldn’t tell whether he was pretending to be unconscious or had truly passed out, but with blood streaming from his mouth, it didn’t look like I’d be getting any help.
“Huff, huff.”
My breathing grew ragged without me realizing it. A shield barely fifty or sixty centimeters across couldn’t properly cover a body as large as mine. The soldier in front of me was already overflowing with the confidence of someone who thought he’d won.
What an irritating bastard.
SWISH. SWISH.
The bastard swung his sword through the air to frighten me, then held his shield forward and aimed the tip of his blade at me. I only had a few jars left.
“Haaap!”
With a battle cry, he charged.
How was I supposed to survive?
The soldier rushing toward me seemed to slow as though he were moving in slow motion. Now that I looked, unlike the others, this bastard wore plate armor over his quilted armor. It was only a set of plate armor with a breastplate connected to an abdominal plate, but still.
SMASH—!
When he came within three or four steps, I hurled the jar in my hand. The bastard raised his shield and blocked the jar flying toward his face.
Then his blade thrust straight at me.
Tap.
“Huh?”
The moment he covered his face with his shield, I crouched as though sitting on the ground. He immediately tripped over my body, and I grabbed the breastplate near the back of his neck with one hand and the abdominal plate near his lower belly with the other.
“Diiiiie-!”
With all my strength, I hurled the bastard down the mountainside.
His stunned eyes met mine. With a triumphant grin, I gave him a goodbye middle finger.
Just before he disappeared down the slope in an arc—
A chill suddenly ran down the back of my neck, raising goosebumps across my skin.
Huh?
Fuck?
SWISH.
For an instant, my vision shook.
The world turned upside down.
The bastard appeared where I had been and landed on his ass. When I turned my head, my eyes met those of the knight reaching a hand toward me.
“You son of a biiiiiiiiiiitch-!”
THUD.
***
[The character has been designated as the target of Gambler Matos’s ‘Shell Game-Switcheroo’.]
[The character’s Magic Resistance is low. The skill takes effect.]