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My Dear Useless Party

Chapter 5 / 85

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Chapter 5 of 85

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Chapter 5: The Trail (2)

My Dear Useless Party

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I followed the trail of belongings I had dropped while being dragged away by goblins with a taste for boiled human flesh. I had been barefoot when I first escaped their lair, but a little while ago, I found the shoes they had stripped off me.

“Maybe I look somewhat human now.”

I had never noticed before, but apparently, there was a huge difference between wearing shoes and going barefoot. I could no longer feel stones stabbing into the soles of my feet. And when I reached the spot where I had been knocked unconscious by the rock, I recovered the sword as well.Full novel: My Dear Useless Party — read the rest free on N​o⁠v​e⁠l​C⁠o​d⁠e​x⁠.​o⁠r​g⁠

“This isn’t a knight’s sword.”

What I had picked up, thinking it was the knight’s sword, wasn’t the knight’s longsword at all. It was a crude jungle blade—a machete. No wonder I had needed to bend over when swinging it for the tip to reach the ground.

SWISH. SWISH.

I swung the machete through the air. The grip didn’t feel particularly good in my hand. Still, the reassuring weight of it seemed to calm me.

“Shall we go?”

I had made several plans while walking here. Whether I liked it or not, I had fallen into the world of a game called [Madness & Abyss]. And because I had played the game, I knew what was going to happen.

‘Not precisely, though.’

My playstyle had focused more on killing enemies than following the story, which was a problem, but I knew the major events. So first, I would follow the story…….

“Kek.”

Two or three meters away stood a tree. Beside it, a pair of pointed ears and a protruding lower belly made their presence known. Judging by the creature’s height, appearance, and color….

“A goblin.”

‘That—that damned bastard.’

The creature covered its eyes with one arm and hid only half its body behind the tree while giggling to itself. It seemed to think it was concealed for an ambush.

‘Does it think I can’t see it just because it covered its own eyes?’

“This is ridiculous.”

Had I really suffered that much because of creatures like this? A wave of self-loathing washed over me.

“Boo!”

“KIEEEEK!”

I quietly circled around and approached from behind. When I shouted without warning, the creature screeched and leapt straight into the air.

“Slash-!”

I split the goblin’s body in half with the machete. Still wearing its startled expression, the goblin dissolved into glowing dust. Unfortunately, it didn’t drop an item.

Slash was a technique that inflicted a fatal wound by swinging a sword.

I had just invented it.

“Slash!”

“Slaaaash-!”

Every time I encountered a goblin, I brought the machete down on the crown of its head. This time, two goblins charged at me with hand axes.

“Super Slash-!”

Super Slash was faster and stronger than regular Slash. The machete swept horizontally and turned both goblins into dust.

“Hm. I might be kind of strong.”

I was heading back to where the stagecoach had been. Regardless of how events had unfolded, the tutorial went like this.

First, the stagecoach traveling to the territory of ‘Parque’ broke down.

Second, the two heroes followed the trail through the forest, killed the monsters that attacked them, and safely reached the territory.

That was it.

In the game, only one of the stagecoach’s wheels had broken, though.

***

“Wow—”

I hadn’t realized it in the darkness last night, but the place where the stagecoach had fallen was a complete wreck. The two horses that had pulled it lay tangled together, their necks and all four legs broken. The boulder that had struck them rested beside the carriage.

“Ah, that stench.”

The closer I moved toward the carriage to examine the wreckage, the more the sharp, nauseating reek of decay stabbed into my nose. At first, I assumed it was merely the smell of the horses and the heroes’ corpses rotting.

But the closer I came, the more certain I became that it wasn’t.

“No way.”

Copper Coins and assorted junk lay scattered around the carriage. Copper Coins were the most numerous, but there were plenty of other items as well. Stone daggers, crude wooden bows, stone axes, and other objects littered the ground.

This area containing the Black Forest was located in the southern part of the continent, a warm region where snow didn’t fall even in winter. Perhaps that was why corpses decayed so quickly. Flies and maggots had already gathered on the carcasses of wild animals lying among the coins and items.

It looked as though someone had playfully splattered red paint everywhere. Discolored blood and entrails were strewn around, while filth worsened the stench.

“Someone hasn’t already looted this place, have they?”

Enduring the smell, I approached the carriage. It had retained its shape better than I expected. The walls, made from luxurious rosewood, were cracked and split apart, and the broken wheels lay on the ground, but still.

CREEEAK.

When I forced the door open, the twisted hinges screamed.

“Huh?”

There was no one inside the carriage. Blood had splattered across the interior decorations and cushions, but not enough for anyone to have died there.

‘Seriously injured? Maybe only lightly.’

I searched the inside, but not even a handkerchief had been left behind.

“Heave-ho.”

I pulled down the luggage that had been secured to the roof with rope.

CRASH.

The wooden crate shattered from the impact when it hit the ground.

“……Nothing special.”

I pulled down two wooden crates and one large suitcase and searched through them. All I found were impractical-looking clothes and miscellaneous items. There were expensive yet uncomfortable clothes, along with several pairs of shoes that looked like a cross between wooden clogs and high heels, finished with costly leather.

“What are the pillows and blankets for?”

After searching all the luggage, I found nothing useful.

“At least the clothes are clean.”

Deciding that something was better than nothing, I changed clothes. I removed the bandage wrapped around my stomach. The wound was healing quickly. There was no pus, and it didn’t seem to have developed a secondary infection. I had wondered whether I might need to cauterize the raw flesh with fire to disinfect it, so this was a relief.

“Maybe I’ll try these.”

I put on the most comfortable-looking outfit among the luxurious clothes. I still felt filthy because I hadn’t washed, but changing clothes made me feel considerably better. I also replaced my shabby bundle bag with a crossbody bag that looked as though it had been made from water buffalo leather.

“Nice.”

None of the shoes looked comfortable, so I decided to keep wearing the pair I already had on. Unfortunately, the owner of these clothes apparently hadn’t been wealthy enough to use gemstones even for buttons. The game had said nobles were extravagant enough to make even their clothing buttons from jewels.

‘I guess this person wasn’t quite that important.’

I climbed onto the carriage and looked around. Beyond the dense leaves that had previously blocked my view, I could see the edge of the castle in the territory of ‘Parque.’ Coincidentally, the trail running through the place where the carriage had fallen led toward the lord’s castle.

“I’m leaving, but I should still take what I can.”

I stuffed the nearby coins and useful items into the crossbody bag. The unfortunate part was that there were no practical supplies such as preserved food or a canteen. Still, I found things like salt and sugar, so I took them.

***

“Slash!”

The goblin’s neck split open where the tip of my blade caught it. I had been too frantic to notice while fighting inside the goblin lair, but this body was good at fighting. After leaving the lair, I had assumed the ordinary goblins were simply pathetic.

SWISH.

“How dare you!”

I snatched a goblin out of the air as it leapt down from a tree.

“Get lost!”

I slammed the struggling creature into the ground.

Then came the soccer kick!

“Ke…r…gh.”

The goblin struck a tree and dissolved into dust. I had already encountered goblins like these several times while walking along the trail. The relatively smaller goblins covered their own eyes and attempted ambushes, while the larger ones charged with weapons.

Of course, neither kind was a match for me.

The fight that had made me confident in my ability had happened a little earlier. That time, three monsters attacked me. Two goblins and a kobold had formed a team.

One goblin carried a spear made by tying a kitchen knife to the end of a wooden pole. The other held a pot-lid-sized shield and a hand axe. The kobold carried a crude bow.

I had been startled when I first saw them blocking the road.

Compared to everything I had faced until then, they were a properly armed monster party.

The first attack was the kobold’s arrow, fired without warning. It was fast. It felt as though it reached me the instant the bowstring was released.

‘But I dodged it.’

That was right.

This body had dodged an arrow after it was fired.

I hadn’t seen it and then moved. My body had moved first.

A single swing of my blade snapped the spear like a dry reed, and one front kick shattered the shield held by the goblin. I charged between them, killed the kobold, then finished off the remaining creatures.

“I’m tired.”

But a problem had arisen.

I was exhausted.

I haven't slept since yesterday. Unless being knocked unconscious by a sling stone counted as sleep. Even now, I had been walking for hours without any rest. No matter how easy the goblins were to defeat, having cold blue blades flickering inches from my face caused no small amount of stress.

My eyes grew increasingly dry, and my vision began to blur.

GROWL.

This situation was fucked. I had been hungry, so I put some hardtack in my mouth, and now I was thirsty. A few pieces of hardtack hadn’t even filled my stomach.

There were this many trees. Surely there had to be somewhere to drink water.

I walked into the forest.

There was no way I would get lost in the woods. I could simply retrace my steps and return to the trail.

How long had I been walking?

‘Running water.’

I heard the sound of water flowing somewhere. My steps quickened.

It was a stream.

The moment I bent down to drink—

“Ah, fuck!”

I saw a dagger embedded in my thigh. I swung at the head of the goblin grinning because its ambush had succeeded.

No.

I failed to take its head off.

The bastard pulled away faster than I expected.

“Grrrk.”

Two wild dogs emerged from behind the goblin. They looked as though they were guarding it.

Had it tamed them?

Had they only traveled together in the game because they were all monsters?

“……Come on, small fry.”

To state the conclusion first, I won.

However, I didn’t come away unharmed.

While one wild dog and the goblin drew my attention, the other latched onto the hem of my pants. The instant my attention shifted toward the animal biting my pants—

“BARK!”

“Oh, for fuck’s sake!”

The other one lunged at me. One bastard pulled on my pants while the other chewed on my arm like a dog treat. I heard the goblin laughing at me beside my ear as I crashed into the stream.

“GLUB, GLUB!”

STAB!

“YELP!”

I stabbed the stomach of the dog biting my arm with the bone awl hidden in my pocket and twisted it.

“SPLASH!”

Water rushed into my nose and irritated the sensitive tissue inside. The burning pain actually snapped me fully awake.

My eyes met those of the wild dog still clinging to my pants. I could see the startled expression on its face.

Today, I learned firsthand that dogs had a wide range of expressions.

“Uaaah—”

A black object filled my vision, and I hurriedly ducked. The goblin had grown enraged when its pet was injured and threw its dagger at me.

The remaining wild dog had already retreated.

“Come……cough! Fuck. Ghk. Khaaak—ptooey!”

I spat out the water that had entered my nose and gone down the wrong pipe. Expecting them to charge during that opening, I reflexively swept the machete through the empty air.

Despite my effort, nothing happened.

I searched for them with bloodshot eyes, but they had apparently fled and were nowhere to be seen.

“…Fuck. Come to think of it, goblins only launched nighttime ambushes in the game. Why are they causing trouble in broad daylight?”

I pulled the bone awl from the dead wild dog and returned it to my pocket.

Rustle.

SHING.

When the bushes shook, I hurriedly pointed my blade toward them. Perhaps because I had just experienced what it felt like to be a villain getting ganged up on, my nerves were stretched taut.

Someone walked out from between the trembling blades of grass.

“…….”

“Ah, thank you, Ru. Greetings, brother.”

He was a man wearing priestly robes and carrying a backpack.

***

[‘Insomnia’ increases Stress.]

[‘Hunger’ increases Stress.]

[Physical abilities decrease due to rising stress.]

[‘Thirst’ increases stress. Stress exceeds the designated threshold.]

[The character’s judgment decreases.]

.

.

.

[‘Event: Dangerous Company’ triggered.]

Full novel: My Dear Useless Party — read the rest free on N​o⁠v​e⁠l​C⁠o​d⁠e​x⁠.​o⁠r​g⁠
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