Xu Yan smiled as he left the cinema by car, but in reality, his emotions had already shattered.
The moment he stepped through the door, the long-suppressed feelings surged over him like a raging flood. His eyes began to redden uncontrollably, and before he could even change his shoes, tears were already streaming down his face.
The sudden emotional collapse sent a tingling numbness through Xu Yan’s fingers, while a sharp, bone-deep pain shot through his right leg, which had only recently healed.
Xu Yan gasped for breath in large, uncontrollable gulps, yet he still felt suffocated, as if he couldn’t get enough air. The numbness began to crawl from his fingertips up his arms, his lips started to go numb, and a familiar paralysis spread through his limbs. Trembling, he collapsed onto the floor, curling his entire body into a ball. As he cried, he thought: He hated Ji Ran, hated him to death.
Why did they have to watch that movie? It was awful.
He never wanted to speak to him again.
In the spacious, minimalist apartment, only Xu Yan remained, curled up on the floor, unable to hold back his breakdown. He knew he was having another episode.
But he was trapped in stagnant water, with no one to save him. Ji Ran—he was just a liar.
They had promised, they had promised—after getting together, they would never part. They would go to Jingcheng together, cook together, watch movies together, and have so many more days ahead.
So why did Ji Ran leave? Why did he leave without even telling him? A single word would have been enough.
And why, just when Xu Yan was almost starting to forget him, did he reappear and do everything they had once dreamed of together? And why did Xu Yan let himself be so easily swayed, forgetting all the pain?
Ji Ran, you’re nothing but a big liar.
Xu Yan, you’re a fool too.
Lost in these thoughts, Xu Yan’s emotions refused to subside. He lay on the floor, crying until his ears began to ring with a strange, unfamiliar buzzing. The world suddenly grew very quiet.
The honking of cars outside, the chirping of birds, the sound of the wind, the patter of rain—Xu Yan couldn’t hear any of it.
In a moment of self-pity, Xu Yan thought bitterly, It’s all Ji Ran’s fault. Let me just cry myself to death.
Emotions come quickly but fade slowly, like peeling away layers of silk. The moment the feelings began to recede, all the sounds around him rushed back into Xu Yan’s ears.
So noisy, so lively.
Xu Yan looked up at the cold, colorless ceiling, forcing the corners of his mouth into a self-mocking smile. Then, expressionless, he slumped back onto the floor, sitting there for a long time until the sky began to clear.
On his phone, Ji Ran had sent many messages.
Xu Yan scrolled through them—all apologies.
【Burnt Spare Ribs】: I’m sorry, I’m sorry, Xu Yan. I messed up this time. Please don’t be angry.
【Burnt Spare Ribs】: It’s my fault. I’m sorry.
【Burnt Spare Ribs】: Can you please talk to me?
Xu Yan vaguely felt that Ji Ran’s personality had changed too much compared to six years ago, but then again, it seemed normal.
Six years had passed, and he had changed a lot too.
Xu Yan shook his sore, swollen arm and replied to Ji Ran: No need to apologize. It’s my problem.
【Burnt Spare Ribs】: I picked a bad movie. Next time, you choose, okay? I’m sorry
【Xu Yan】: There won’t be a next time.
【Xu Yan】: I don’t like watching movies.
After sending the reply, Xu Yan turned off his phone completely. He needed to be alone, to clear his mind and sleep, without anyone disturbing him.
“Bang, bang, bang.” Xu Yan had a habit of waking up irritable, and early in the morning, he was jolted awake by a series of fierce knocks on the door.
Anyone would have thought it was a debt collector.
He buried his head under the covers, struggling for a long time before he couldn’t take it anymore. With a sense of utter despair, he got dressed, got up, and opened the door.
The moment the door opened, Xu Yan saw Xu Yao with her rose-red curly hair and two dazzling black earrings in her left ear. He felt like his head was about to explode.
Xu Yan slammed the door shut with a loud “bang.”
“Hey, bro! It’s me! Open the door!” Xu Yao knocked impatiently on the door, a lollipop dangling from her mouth. When her brother showed no sign of moving, she simply lifted her foot and started kicking.
“Xu Yan! Open the door! If you don’t, I’ll call the police and tell them my brother died at home!” Xu Yao completely ignored the fact that this was a residential building with terrible soundproofing, shouting directly at her brother’s door.
Xu Yan sighed at the door. He shouldn’t have been soft-hearted enough to give his sister his current address.
“Come in,” Xu Yan said, opening the door wide to let Xu Yao in, and casually asked, “Have you had breakfast?”
Xu Yao shook her head, indicating she hadn’t, then her eyes lit up as she pointed to the two large suitcases by the door.
Xu Yan gave her a cold look, ignored her, and walked into the kitchen to start making breakfast.
Xu Yao: Alright, her brother wasn’t going to help her.
With great effort, Xu Yao dragged both large suitcases into her brother’s apartment, sneaking a glance into the kitchen as she did. Oh, Xu Yan was actually cooking for her.
Much more reliable than their parents.
With that, Xu Yao boldly began to explore her brother’s apartment. A spacious, bright open-plan layout, minimalist design in cool black-and-white tones, and three bedrooms—far better than the dump she called home.
It seemed her decision to seek refuge with her brother was absolutely the right choice!
Xu Yan finished making breakfast and placed it in the dining area, only to see Xu Yao sprawled by the floor-to-ceiling window, curiously staring outside.
“Xu Yao, come eat.”
No response.
“Xu Yao, I’m counting to three,” Xu Yan said indifferently, looking at her by the window as he began counting down on his fingers. “One.”
“Coming, coming! Xu Yan, are there always this many cars in Nanjiang?” Xu Yao asked curiously, tilting her head.
“No,” Xu Yan took a sip of milk, his expression calm. “There are so many cars now because it’s the May Day holiday.”
“Ah?” Xu Yao was a bit shocked. This was her first time in Nanjiang, the big city in her eyes.
Seems like big cities aren’t all that great.
Xu Yao pouted and started nibbling on the bread in her hand, waiting for her brother to ask why she had come to Nanjiang so she could brag about her runaway adventure.
But throughout the entire meal, her brother didn’t ask a single question or say a single word. No wonder their mom always said he was a bookworm who’d lost his social skills.
“Xu Yan, aren’t you curious why I came to you?” Xu Yao pouted, a bit annoyed.
“Couldn’t stand being at home anymore,” Xu Yan said flatly, his eyes inadvertently carrying a hint of disdain, which Xu Yao noticed.
“Bro, do you look down on me?”
Xu Yan nodded.
He’d always looked down on her, ever since they were kids.
Seeing this, Xu Yao flopped onto the sofa behind her in exasperation, tugging at her hair as she muttered to herself, “They’re fighting every day now. You’d think with me being so rebellious, they’d at least pay attention to me. It’s so weird.”
“Normal. I don’t want to deal with you either.”
Hearing this, Xu Yao didn’t get angry. Instead, she swung her legs with unusual ease and said, “That’s fine. It’s better if you don’t deal with me. More freedom that way.”
“And I won’t bother you like I did when we were kids,” Xu Yao said lightly, but Xu Yan still keenly detected a hint of a sob in her voice.
Xu Yan said coldly, “If you want to cry, then cry. Don’t hold it in.”
Upon hearing this, Xu Yao completely broke down and began sobbing uncontrollably. “I don’t want to stay there anymore. Xu Guodong gambles every day, and Gu Xiaorou hits and scolds me all the time. Whenever they come home, they just fight and argue. No matter how much I try to calm them down, it never works. If I stay there any longer, I feel like I’m going to get depressed!”
Xu Yan wanted to comfort her, but Xu Yao gave him no chance. “And my grades aren’t good either. I definitely can’t get into college through the gaokao. Besides, Lilin doesn’t even have good art or sports training schools.”
“Brother, I don’t want to stay there. I want to transfer schools. I want to come to Nanjiang! I want to take the art college entrance exam!” Xu Yao wailed and began throwing a tantrum, rolling around on the floor. She had truly had enough of her miserable life in Lilin. She wanted to follow in her brother’s footsteps and cut ties with them completely.
Xu Yan fell silent for a moment before refusing, “No.”
He couldn’t stand having someone else in his home.
“Go back after the May Day holiday,” Xu Yan issued a firm order.
“But I don’t dare go back either,” Xu Yao paused, wiped away her tears, and grinned mischievously. “Besides, I already followed your example and came out to them.”
The atmosphere in the room suddenly grew tense. Xu Yan’s pupils dilated in shock. He was stunned by Xu Yao’s openness and couldn’t help but marvel at her rebelliousness.
Then, his expression returned to calm. It was normal—nothing in their family was ever out of the ordinary.
He felt that, as her older brother, he should scold her. But after a moment’s thought, he couldn’t help but smile bitterly. What right did he have to lecture her? When he was her age, he had been much the same.
“Have you thought it through?” Xu Yan asked.
“Yes. I’ve made up my mind,” Xu Yao nodded immediately, her eyes firm. “I never want to go back.”
Xu Yan took out his phone and made a video call to his biological mother, whom he hadn’t contacted in a long time.
On the other end, Gu Xiaorou answered the call—something she had never done before.
“Xu Yan, is Yao Yao with you?” Gu Xiaorou asked anxiously.
Xu Yan nodded and got straight to the point. “Xu Yao told me everything. Don’t worry.”
“She doesn’t want to go back to Lilin, and she doesn’t want to take the gaokao. I’ll let her stay in Nanjiang, and I’ll take care of her,” Xu Yan said calmly. His mother seemed to finally relax.
“That’s good, that’s good. It’s only right for an older brother to look after his younger sister. You should find a good school for her, and you’re making money now anyway,” Gu Xiaorou said, but then, as if remembering something, her expression turned fearful. “No, your sister has been corrupted by you. Send Yao Yao back.”
Xu Yan laughed in frustration. “I’m just informing you, Ms. Gu Xiaorou, not asking for your opinion.” He then hung up the video call.
“I’ll help you find a school tomorrow,” Xu Yan said, dropping the statement. Xu Yao was so overjoyed that she leaped up from the sofa.
Her brother was truly reliable.
In Xu Yan’s home, aside from the bedroom he slept in, one room had been converted into a study, and the other into a home gym.
He arranged for Xu Yao to stay in the study but forgot that she was a careless and restless person by nature.
In her rush to tidy up the study so she could sleep comfortably, Xu Yao accidentally bumped into the nearby bookshelf.
With a crack, a glass photo frame placed on the edge of the bookshelf fell to the floor.
Glass shards scattered everywhere, but fortunately, the photo remained intact.
Xu Yao picked up the photo from among the broken glass and covered her mouth in surprise.
In the photo, sunlight filtered through the leaves, casting a stunning play of light and shadow on the figures. Xu Yan, wearing his high school uniform, looked youthful and innocent. He faced the camera with his right hand forming a peace sign, while his left hand rested casually on the shoulder of another person in the photo, his smile bright and unrestrained.
Her brother’s smile back then was actually quite charming. As for the other person in the photo, he appeared cold and unapproachable.
Let’s call him Cold Guy for now.
But Xu Yao couldn’t shake the feeling that Cold Guy’s eyes were glancing toward her brother. Suddenly, a bold suspicion popped into her mind. The moment her brother opened the study door, she held up the photo, pointed at Cold Guy’s face, and boldly asked, “Bro, is this my sister-in-law?”
Xu Yan: “…”