“Hoshi, that barbecue sauce just now was amazing!
I feel like my chakra is practically overflowing!” Naruto patted his round belly with a goofy grin.
His palms, which had been chafed raw after pulling weeds for three hours, had long since healed.
“Naruto, that’s because you just ate three people’s worth of meat.
The four portions of ramen were purely you stuffing yourself.
Good thing I ordered extra.
I thought Choji was a big eater, but it turns out you were hiding your true power too.” Hoshi kept his hands jammed in his pockets, his short black hair swaying gently in the breeze.
Suddenly, his eyes narrowed slightly.
Choji paused mid-chip and glared at Hoshi, as if to say, *Are you calling me fat?* At the corner ahead, a man with spiky silver hair, a black face mask, and a holster slung across his shoulder was ambling along.
In his hand was a small, extremely suspicious red book—*Make-Out Paradise*.
He walked with the lazy slouch of a salted fish, but Hoshi acutely sensed a profound, inscrutable gleam behind his single exposed, sleepy eye.
“Kakashi?” Hoshi’s lips curled up slightly, a mischievous glint flashing in his dark eyes.
“Hoshi, isn’t that the legendary Kakashi Hatake-sama?
My dad said he’s Konoha’s top technician—he’s super cool!” Ino whispered from behind Hoshi, her eyes filled with admiration.
“Oh, he’s amazing, alright—Konoha’s top technician indeed.” Hoshi lowered his voice and gestured to Naruto, Shikamaru, Choji, and Ino behind him.
“Hey guys, want to watch Konoha’s top technician get humiliated?
It’ll be way more fun than academy classes.” “Prank Kakashi-sama?
What a pain…
That doesn’t sound like a good idea…” Shikamaru complained, though his eyes sparkled with eager excitement.
“Relax, I’ll take the blame if anything goes wrong.
Besides, I’m just helping Kakashi-sama sharpen his situational awareness.” Hoshi quickly assigned their roles.
“Ino, Naruto, you two handle the sob story.
Shikamaru, Choji, you set the mood.
As for me…
I’ll play the ‘vulnerability.'” Meanwhile, Kakashi, thoroughly engrossed in Jiraiya’s masterpiece, suddenly felt a subtle shift in his surroundings.
“Hmm?” He closed the book to see an elderly woman with pure white hair, trembling violently and hunched so low her back was almost parallel to the ground, leaning on a cane in the middle of the street while waiting helplessly by the busy traffic.
“Cough, cough…
Young people these days have no manners.
I’ve been standing here for half an hour, and not a single soul has offered a hand…” The old woman’s raspy, feeble voice sounded positively heartbreaking.
Kakashi tucked his book away and instinctively stepped forward to guide the old woman across the street.
“Thank you, young man.
I couldn’t have crossed without you.” The old woman offered a quick word of thanks before hobbling awkwardly along with her cane.
Kakashi narrowed his sleepy eye, a prickle of suspicion rising in his mind.
*Her footsteps were slow, but why was her breathing rhythm so rock steady?* Before he could examine further, two heart-wrenching wails echoed from across the street.
“Waaah—!
My candy!
You dumb dog, give my candy back!” Kakashi turned to look.
Two “children” around six or seven years old (shrunken Transformation versions of Naruto and Ino) were sitting on the ground, wiping away tears.
One was a snot-smeared mess (courtesy of Naruto’s natural performance), while the other wept like a delicate rain-soaked flower.
Before them, a nimble white pup trotted about victoriously, wagging its tail with a colorful candy pouch held firmly in its mouth.
*Holy crap, why isn’t that dog running away?* Hoshi, transformed into a random passerby repairing shoes nearby, broke into a cold sweat as he watched Kiba’s Akamaru.
Kakashi stood rooted to the spot, a cold sweat dropping down his forehead.
*Isn’t this script…
a bit too crammed?* As a dutiful Konoha Jonin, helping kids retrieve stolen candy fell squarely within his duties.
Sighing, he Body-Flickered in front of the stray dog, snatched the candy bag back with a swift reach, and gently handed it to the two “children.” “There, there, don’t cry.
A ninja doesn’t shed tears so easily.” Kakashi patted Ino and Naruto on the head.
“Thank you, big brother!
You look like such a good person!” Ino (in her transformed state) chirped sweetly, while Naruto took the opportunity to wipe his nose right onto Kakashi’s flak jacket.
“Ah…
right.
Just be more careful next time.” Without thinking much of it, Kakashi flickered to the side, whipped out his newly bought book, and eagerly dove back into reading.
Once Kakashi was out of earshot, Hoshi canceled his Transformation technique and offered his critique to the group.
“Shikamaru, you almost blew it just now.
How could a normal old woman crossing the street have such steady breath control?
Are you trying to act like that legendary popsicle-vending grandma?
And Naruto, your acting was a bit out of character.
Make it natural.
Boys don’t just sit and cry when they hit a setback—they rush in headfirst, scrape their noses, and *then* run back crying while clinging to someone’s pant legs to wipe their snot.
Um, Ino, you did great, keep it up.
As for Akamaru…
I don’t even know what to say.
Kiba, just give better directions and let him act naturally.” “What?
We both acted!
Why didn’t Ino get chewed out?” Naruto pouted sulkily.
Ino bristled at his words, rolling up her sleeves as if preparing for a fight.
“What did you say, dead-last?
In what world are you better than me?” “Sigh, women are such a pain.
Choji, hand over some chips.
I’m actually getting kind of hungry.” Shikamaru lazily grabbed a few potato chips from Choji and munched on them.
Hoshi let out a helpless laugh.
“Everyone, look under that tree over there—Kakashi hasn’t gone far yet.
Let me pull one more attempt, but let’s make it as realistic as possible this time.
It’s not every day you get to prank an elite Jonin.” “Alright, let me at him!” Hearing the words ‘elite Jonin,’ Naruto instantly fired up again.
And so, the kids repeated the trick with a few adjustments, staging another elderly-woman-crossing-the-street and vicious-dog-stealing-toys scenario at the next corner.
This time around, Kakashi got spat on by the coughing grandma, had his pants smeared with Naruto’s snot, and even had his sandal bitten by Akamaru.
All in all, nothing terrible happened, but Kakashi was left looking thoroughly disheveled, earning himself a piece of candy handed to him by the “kids.” Standing at the empty intersection, Kakashi unwrapped the paper package and popped a candy into his mouth.
Instantly, a wave of sheer spicy heat shot straight into his skull, bringing tears to his eyes.
“Oh yeah!
We got the legendary Kakashi!” Ino cheered, jumping up and down.
“I actually pranked an elite Jonin!
Check out how awesome I am!” Naruto gloated, bouncing with excitement.
The others hiding nearby dropped their act and chuckled along, though none were quite as loud as Naruto.
*Those brats…
especially that black-haired one…
How annoying.
But he really does look a bit like Sensei…* Watching Hoshi’s straight, surprisingly calm silhouette, Kakashi felt his lips curve into a faint smile beneath his mask.
*Konoha…
is really starting to get interesting.*