Mu Wen’s hometown was called Yakeshi, an unknown small fourth-tier city.
It was a fascinating place. Like a ribbon, it connected the endless Hulunbuir Grassland with the Greater Khingan Mountains.
When Mu Wen was in high school, she once proudly wrote in an essay:
“I have the broad heart of the grassland and the accepting nature of the forest…”
Her teacher liked Mu Wen and told her, “Your essay is quite good. It would be even better if you were a little more modest.”
Mu Wen immediately stood straight, saluted, and said, “Okay, Teacher. I’ll remember that!”
Yakeshi had very short summers and very long winters. Half the year was basically winter.
The first snow usually came at the end of September, and after that, winter arrived in a hurry.
Her father, Mu Dechang, no longer drove long-distance trucks.
His life had been full of hardships. During the years when he drove trucks, he had managed to save some money, enough for the family to live comfortably in Yakeshi.
One winter, he was caught in a heavy snowstorm and got into an accident on the highway.
The driver’s cabin was crushed out of shape. When the traffic police pulled Mu Dechang out of the truck, his whole body had been badly crushed, and he was barely hanging on to life.
As usual, they rushed him to the hospital for emergency treatment.
He underwent more than a dozen operations, big and small, and finally survived.
But all their savings were gone, and they were left with some debt.
Fortunately, Mu Wen’s parents were hardworking and optimistic. Little by little, they managed to build their life back up.
Mu Wen had originally been a playful child. She relied on her natural intelligence and usually ranked somewhere in the middle or upper-middle range at school.
After her father was injured, she thought:
I have to study hard. I want to show Dad certificates for being an outstanding student and for ranking first.
She did exactly what she said.
From then on, she kept ranking first in her class and never let her grades fall again.
Now things were better.
Her father no longer drove big trucks, and her mother no longer had to live in fear for his safety.
Her father drove a small car instead, traveling between the grasslands and the forests to transport people and deliver goods. Sometimes he also took tourists around Hulunbuir.
Although his income was unstable, their life was peaceful.
Mu Wen loved going along with her father when he made deliveries.
She had barely arrived home and warmed up her feet when she followed Mu Dechang to Ewenki Banner.
Going to the banner in winter was great fun.
They would find a safe place and watch eagles and falcons circle high in the sky.
The sight was magnificent.
Right now, all Mu Wen could see was endless white.
She wore a small pair of sunglasses and wrapped herself in a wool blanket. Sniffling from the cold, she said to Mu Dechang,
“Dad, why don’t we get a new small car next year?”
“This one can still run!”
Mu Dechang turned the heater up as high as it would go, but it was almost useless.
The old car was nearly ready to be retired, and it seemed as though cold air was leaking in from every direction.
Mu Wen felt sorry for her father, but she remained optimistic.
“After I graduate, I’ll start working full-time. My company pays really well. I’ll definitely buy you a new car.”
Mu Dechang didn’t want to ruin her excitement. He smiled honestly.
“Okay. Then buy me a small truck. Small trucks can carry more goods.”
“Okay!”
Mu Wen said proudly,
“I know a lot about cars now. I know everything from cars that cost thirty or fifty thousand yuan to cars that cost three or five million!”
“You even know the three-to-five-million-yuan ones?”
“Hehe. I’ve ridden in one.”
Mu Wen said, “One of my clients gave me a ride when I was doing my internship. But Dad, as expensive as that car was, it was sealed so tightly that I got carsick after sitting in it for too long.”
She tapped the frost on the car window with her finger.
“Our car is still better. It’s comfortable. You feel grounded, and you’re wide awake!”
“Wide awake?” Mu Dechang laughed loudly. “You’re so awake that you’re freezing until your nose is running!”
In the afternoon, they arrived at a small village.
They unloaded the supplies at the village committee office and called the herders one by one to tell them to come and collect their things.
Mu Wen especially liked making these calls because the signal was poor here.
She first had to find a place with a slightly better signal, then start shouting into the phone.
After going to university in Tianjin, Mu Wen had become accustomed to city life and had rarely experienced the feeling of shouting at the top of her lungs.
But now she stood in the middle of the heavy snow and shouted loudly:
“Suhe Balu! Your things are at the village committee office! Where? The village! Committee! Office!”
“Na Rishong! Your things are at the village committee office! The village! Committee! Office!”
…
Mu Dechang and one of the village officials stood nearby chatting.
The official said that once the road here was repaired, buses would be able to travel all the way to Ulanhot.
A few years later, they would build a railway too, and trains would be able to go all the way to Hohhot.
Mu Dechang said, “Then I’ll have no work left. Once transportation becomes convenient, everyone can go out easily. They won’t need me to help buy things anymore.”
“When transportation becomes easier, more people will come here,” the young official said. “Then you can become a full-time tour guide. You’re really good at this.”
Mu Wen saw her father smile happily.
Her phone suddenly rang with an unfamiliar number.
She answered, but the person on the other end seemed unable to hear her clearly.
She shouted for a while before finally hanging up.
During the call, she thought she heard three or four words that sounded like Xie Chong.
She stared blankly for a moment, then decided it couldn’t be him.
She already had his number!
The herders rode over through the wind and snow to collect their supplies.
Mu Wen became a salesperson again and sold all the remaining goods her father had brought.
Some people still remembered her.
They would ask,
“Girl, are you on vacation? Did you come back to work for the village?”
Mu Wen waved her hands.
“No. I’m going to Beijing to work!”
The person would open his eyes wide.
“Beijing? That’s so far away! I love Beijing’s Tiananmen!”
Mu Wen would tease him.
“I’m impressive, right?”
The herder would reply in a thick local accent,
“Impressive! Very impressive!”
She was happy throughout the entire New Year holiday.
Being with her parents was enough to make her happy.
Sometimes she would think of Xie Chong.
What was he doing?
Would he ever think of me at some moment too?
After all, she was still young, with a heart that was warm and full of possibilities. She had not yet experienced enough of life to fill that heart with too many things.
She would hope that Xie Chong might call her one day and chat with her.
After all, their last meeting had been so warm, and they seemed to have become friends.
But she overlooked one thing.
Some people were warm and close when they met, but distant and indifferent when they were apart.
Xie Chong was that kind of person.
Once, while passing Baishi Bridge, he thought of Mu Wen.
But it was only for a moment.
He had too many things to do.
Mu Wen’s appearance in his life was like the final song of 2010—unique and memorable.
But 2010 would eventually pass, and they would move on to 2011.
Xie Chong successfully collected all his outstanding payments.
On New Year’s Eve, he went to see his new house.
According to Mu Wen, the house should now have white walls and wooden floors, clean and spotless.
She had not lied to him.
Qian Song took two camping chairs out of the car and placed them in the empty living room.
The two men sat there quietly for a while.
Qian Song said that Jiang Wu had recently been spending a lot of time with another man.
He told Xie Chong to hurry up, or Jiang Wu might leave him behind.
Xie Chong looked completely downhearted.
He felt that he and Jiang Wu had truly lost their chance.
He often remembered Jiang Wu moving confidently on horseback, or throwing herself in front of his suddenly frightened horse without hesitation to save him.
He would never compete or fight for someone.
He always felt that fighting over love was embarrassing.
If you had to fight for it, then it probably wasn’t true love.
He was going to Foshan to visit his parents, who were living there for a while.
After that, he would go to England to handle some work.
Thinking about the few remaining renovation matters, he took out his phone and wanted to call Mu Wen.
But his phone had no battery.
He borrowed Qian Song’s phone and called her instead.
That clueless Mu Wen was doing something on the other end of the line. The wind was howling so loudly that she could barely hear him, and she wasn’t speaking normally either.
She shouted,
“Who are you? Who are you?”
…
Even through the phone, Xie Chong could feel how painfully cold the wind was.
It was probably snowing too.
He even joked,
“Did someone sell you off to some remote mountain village?”
His joke received no response because Mu Wen couldn’t hear him at all.
She continued asking tirelessly,
“Who—are—you?”
Xie Chong unconsciously raised his voice too.
“I am Xie! Chong!”
She still asked,
“Who! Are! You! Do! You! Need! Something?!”
Xie Chong finally lost his patience.
He shouted,
“I’m your uncle!”
Then he hung up.
Qian Song laughed so hard that he almost fell out of his camping chair.
“Hahahaha! How did you two manage to get angry while talking on the phone? And why did you suddenly become her uncle?”
“She’s crazy!”
Xie Chong was still annoyed.
“I’ve never met anyone so strange!”
The next day, he went to Foshan and met his parents, Xie Dongfeng and Liao Xiaohua.
His parents had always been busy with business.
When he was young, he had mostly lived with his maternal grandparents and paternal grandparents at different times, so he was actually not very close to his parents.
The three of them walked around Foshan, took some tourist photos, and had a few meals together.
Then Xie Chong left for England.
On February 25, Mu Wen began preparing to return to school.
Yakeshi was still deep in its long winter when she left.
Her parents took her to Hailar to catch the train.
Looking at her hometown still hiding indoors from the winter cold, Mu Wen felt deeply reluctant to leave.
Before saying goodbye, she repeatedly told Mu Dechang,
“Dad, next New Year I’ll definitely buy you a small car! Believe me!”
Mu Dechang actually didn’t care whether she bought him a car.
He only hoped his daughter would not work so hard.
He felt that because of his accident, his daughter had already been forced to give up some of the things she could have had in life.
Her grades had been so good.
She could have continued to graduate school, even pursued a doctorate, and spent her days surrounded by the books she loved.
When the train pulled away, Mu Wen shed two more tiny tears.
Her hometown slowly disappeared into the distance, and she traveled from the frozen world of snow and ice back to Tianjin.
Graduation season seemed to last forever.
She rarely left campus.
She stopped going to her favorite Fifth Avenue.
She stopped going to watch the Jiefang Bridge open.
She spent all her time preparing for graduation.
During this period, she almost completely cut herself off from the outside world.
And finally, her university life came to a successful end.
She was going back to Beijing.
Chu Ling had already rented an apartment.
It was a two-bedroom apartment on the first floor.
The landlord kept some belongings locked in the second bedroom. The master bedroom had two single beds with a long narrow table between them.
Mu Wen and Chu Ling split the 1,500-yuan rent between them.
They had their own bathroom and kitchen.
Chu Ling sent Mu Wen photos of the apartment.
When Mu Wen saw several little flowers growing on the windowsill, her mood instantly brightened.
She immediately went to the bank and transferred her share of the rent to Chu Ling.
The money she used to rent the apartment came from the second 5,000-yuan bonus Xie Chong had given her before she left Beijing.
She had saved the first 5,000 yuan for emergencies.
At that moment, she thought of Xie Chong again.
She often thought of him without realizing it.
But she had never contacted him first.
She could imagine Xie Chong’s reaction if he received a call he didn’t want to answer.
He would probably think it was a waste of time.
And if he wanted to contact someone, he would simply contact them.
Xie Chong might have completely forgotten her by now.
His life was filled with too many interesting people and things.
When he wanted excitement, he could have it.
When he wanted peace and quiet, he could have that too.
He lived entirely according to his own wishes.
That was a kind of life Mu Wen could not yet have.
But she always believed that one day, she would have it too.
In July, Beijing had just been hit by a rainstorm, and the weather was unbearably hot and humid.
Mu Wen stood inside her “new home.”
The apartment was across from an overpass, and now she was even closer to the supermarket.
It was in a very old residential community filled with many elderly people and children.
Chu Ling had already cleaned the whole place.
To welcome Mu Wen home, she had even gone to the supermarket to buy meat and prepared hot pot.
Yes.
They had a kitchen now.
They had cooking utensils.
They had their own induction cooker, frying pan, and dishes.
Back when they had lived in a shared apartment with bunk beds, they had sometimes dreamed about the day when they would no longer have to live in a crowded rental.
They wanted to say goodbye to that strange pervert who occasionally ran around naked.
But neither of them had imagined that this day would come so quickly.
Mu Wen’s endless energy returned once again.
She told Chu Ling to wait.
She was going to make hand-pulled noodles to add a proper staple food to their hot pot.
She had learned how to knead dough from Ge Yunqing.
Once she put on an apron, she disappeared into the kitchen.
The old range hood above her head made a tremendous noise.
The summer kitchen was hot and humid.
A small electric fan on the counter blew directly toward her.
Her hair became damp with sweat and stuck to her forehead in strands.
She hummed while making the noodles.
Chu Ling helped beside her.
“Mu Wen, why are you so happy?”
Mu Wen held her hand under Chu Ling’s nose.
“Smell it. Doesn’t it smell wonderful?”
The scent of flour covered her entire hand.
It made her feel safe and settled.
It was a habit she had developed during the long winters in her hometown of Yakeshi.
As long as there was food in the house, there was nothing to fear during winter.
That simple feeling eased the sadness she still carried after leaving school.
It also calmed the faint fear she felt deep inside about truly beginning her life in Beijing.
“I really love having a kitchen, Chu Ling.”
Mu Wen raised her little flour-covered hand and made a solemn vow.
“From now on, every free weekend, I’ll spend it in the kitchen and cook everything I’ve learned in my life for you.”
Chu Ling clapped beside her.
“Then every weekend, I’ll buy a bunch of fresh flowers and fill our home with their fragrance.”
Just imagining such a life felt wonderful.
Mu Wen was very happy.
That afternoon, it started raining again.
Mu Wen took Chu Ling to work her night shift.
On her way home, she passed the restaurant where she had once unexpectedly seen Xie Chong.
A man stood under an umbrella beside the stone post at the entrance, talking on the phone.
The umbrella covered his face, but Mu Wen recognized his figure immediately.
She involuntarily stopped and held her breath.
Rain fell from the umbrella in thin streams.
The moment each stream hit the ground, it shattered into countless droplets, forming circles of splashing water around him and separating him from the rest of the world like a lonely little island.
Mu Wen walked past him with her umbrella.
The rain was loud, but she heard the man say,
“Who would buy that piece of junk? Unless you’re selling it all the way to Africa.”
It really was Xie Chong.
The world was unbelievably small.
So very, very small.
Mu Wen was delighted.
She had to say hello to Xie Chong.
After all, on her very first day back in Beijing, she had actually run into him!
She reached out and knocked on his umbrella.
She heard him curse,
“What kind of crazy person is this?”
She burst out laughing.
She raised her umbrella higher.
Just as he was about to start cursing again, her happy face appeared beneath the umbrella.
“Mr. Xie! It really is you!”
Xie Chong frowned slightly.
For a moment, he looked as though he couldn’t remember who she was.
Mu Wen pointed at herself.
“Me! It’s me! Mu Wen, the intern who helped renovate your house! Mr. Xie, did you lose your memory?”
She waited eagerly for him to recognize her.
But suddenly, another hand reached out from beneath Xie Chong’s umbrella.
Someone teased him,
“Are you hiding from drinks here? Come on, let’s go!”
Xie Chong was pulled away.
Mu Wen felt disappointed.
People with important lives really did forget ordinary people easily.
He actually didn’t remember me.
She realized that in a city like Beijing, people’s meetings and partings really were like rapidly flowing water.
The water kept moving eastward, carrying away tiny grains of sand and little stones.
Only something big enough could remain behind.
In Xie Chong’s heart, she was not a large stone.
She was only a grain of sand.
That cruel realization left Mu Wen feeling lost.
She returned home, took a hot shower, then sat cross-legged on her bed with her wet hair and flipped through a book.
It felt so comfortable.
She put on her earphones, and her old MP3 player played music for her.
“Rain and tears are the same…”
Mu Wen put down her book and rested her forehead against the window, watching the rain pour down and wash the city clean.
Her phone rang.
She didn’t look at who was calling and simply answered.
The voice on the other end was slightly hoarse.
“Mu Wen, you’re back in Beijing.”
Mu Wen instinctively looked at her phone.
The caller’s name on the screen was:
Xie Chong.