SHAN
“Ah…
Fuck.”
I took off my helmet after getting off the motorcycle.
I was out with Hiro and Haze for a race.
It was scorching hot, so I immediately headed for the shade and grabbed some water.
I zipped down on my suit and left it hanging on my waist, which left me with my black shirt.
It was not a good idea to do this today.
It was so hot.
“You won this time.” Haze said competitively after getting off the motorcycle.
He walked toward me while drinking water.
Hiro, on the other hand, poured the water from the bottle on his head until it dripped down on his body because it was too hot and he was getting soaked in his own sweat.
“Play polo with me and I swear I’ll beat you.”
“Easy, boys.” I shrugged, boasting that I had won today.
I took off my shirt and used it to wipe my sweat while waiting for the Juarez brothers to change.
Once they had changed, I grabbed my shirt too so we could head to our next activity.
They really wanted to play polo so I just went along with them.
I didn’t have anything to do today.
___________________________
We arrived at a polo field where they play.
Hiro and Haze already had their own horses so I just chose a random one.
We also had to change our clothes while waiting for the employee there to find some teammates for us.
The brothers are always here so they know the players well.
I already knew how to play so they didn’t have to teach me again.
After getting some teammates, we started playing.
Hiro and Haze were competing.
I was teamed up with Hiro.
I almost fell off my horse while playing so I stopped to fix my ride.
The two brothers were going wild.
They were both competitive with each other.
Our team won.
Haze claimed it was because his teammates sucked.
They really refuse to back down.
“My body will probably hurt tomorrow.” I said upon returning to the bleachers.
“I hope it doesn’t hurt on Sunday.”
“Why?
Are you going somewhere?” Hiro asked me.
“I’m going to play baseball.”
“Let’s play baseball on Sunday, then.” Haze said.
“No way.” I said so quickly that both of them stared at me for being too defensive.
“Uh…
I’m with someone else.”
“A date.” They said in unison, nodding as well.
“It’s not!” I denied, but it was as if they didn’t hear a thing.
____________________________
I listed down the sports I played so we could discover them together.
Kierra said she didn’t play any sports except volleyball for P.E so we tried to discover where she was good at instead.
Arts.
We bought a canvas for each of us and found a good place to paint.
We sat in a garden near the lake with a picnic mat to sit on.
I also brought food, just in case we would feel hungry.
She looked so angelic, wearing a cute light blue checkered dress and her long hair was in a half ponytail with a pastel blue ribbon at the back, leaving her bangs sitting pretty on her forehead.
It suited her well.
“I really like arts.” She said to me while drawing on her canvas.
“It calms me down when I paint nature.”
I didn’t know what to paint.
I was just staring at her back and unconsciously sketching it on the small canvas I was holding.
I wasn’t good at painting but also not bad at it.
My mother liked painting, too.
She was in front of me because she wanted to take a closer look at the lake, so my view of her back was clear.
I picked some colors that would suit my painting.
Mostly blue, green, white, and brown.
I made her hair golden brown.
It is still being blown sideways by the wind.
I smiled to myself while listening to her stories.
She was talking about her cousin.
Painting together was apparently a bonding activity for them when they were kids.
I didn’t even know that her dad was a famous painter before.
He reportedly works at the Valeria Group now, handling concepts and design, but he was also a part-time professor at a renowned art school in Manila.
“That’s why I love art.
I have such a great relationship with my dad.
We spend a lot of time together creating art.
My very first drawing from when I was a kid is even framed at home.” He laughed and looked at me.
“I’ll show it to you if you ever drop by the house.”
“I could tell that your dad is such a great person.” I knew she looked up to him.
I felt happy that she was being treated well by her family.
“I should see his works.”
“Oh, we also have them in the house!
Daddy has an art room there.
That’s where he works.
It’s a bit messy, though—you know, paint everywhere, and of course, it’s chaotic because he has so many ideas—but it’s a beautiful mess.
You should come over so you can see it!”
“I would love to.” I said, busy with my own painting.
I finished before she did.
I was very satisfied with my work.
I washed my hands and lay down on the picnic mat, eating an apple while I waited for her.
She was in her own world while painting; she didn’t want to show me yet because she said it wasn’t finished.
“Okay, I’m done.
Let’s swap.”
I picked up my painting as soon as she said that.
She counted down before we quickly exchanged canvases.
My lips parted in surprise when I saw her work.
She had done all of this in such a short time?
“Wow…” I exclaimed.
“It’s so beautiful.
You’re a good artist, wow…” I complimented.
“It’s so nice to look at.”
“Thank you.” She smiled at me, looking a bit shy, before pointing to my work.
“Is this me?” She asked delightedly, and I nodded.
“Wow, no one has ever painted me before, except for my dad.
I like this!
Can I keep it?”
I didn’t know if she was lying because it was not even that good compared to hers, but she looked so happy with it.
We decided to keep each other’s paintings.
She kept on looking at mine and smiling.
She was even touching the colors a bit.
“It’s beautiful.” She said to me.
“I love it…”
“It’s really not that great…” Compared to her work, mine probably looks like something a child made.
I don’t know what she sees in it.
“It’s me…” She giggled and pointed at herself in the painting.
She was so happy there that I smiled.
The subject was pretty.
“Nothing.
I’m just happy.
Is this how I look like in your perspective?”
“More beautiful than that.” I said.
She stared at me for a moment before smiling and looking away.
___________________________
When I got home, I immediately placed her painting on my side table so I could always see it.
It was calming to look at.
The next day, we played baseball.
She was not that good at it because it was her first time, but the joy she felt when she successfully hit the ball made me feel so happy too.
“I was a cheerful child because I was always with Luna.
My dad is from Bataan, so we frequently vacationed there, especially by the seaside.
I liked making friends.
Whenever I was in the province, I felt like a different person—especially since they called me by a different name there.”
“What name?”
“Ayi.”
When I heard the name, I suddenly remembered a vivid memory from childhood.
The little girl at the resort who always wanted to play with me.
The events from back then came flooding back to me one after another.
“Yes…
In Bataan.
At the beach…”
I stared at her, remembering more memories.
My childhood was not that great, so I could only remember pieces of them, but it was one of those great memories with my mom and stepdad in Bataan.
That was why I could remember them.
“Ta-da!
Welcome to Valeria High!”
Fuck, something flashed back.
The girl…
The morena one that was awfully familiar to me when Hiro and I went here for their Foundation Day.
I quickly remembered now why I was staring so much.
The face!
They were pretty similar.
“Ah, yes…
How could I forget…
We really have already met before.”
She was familiar because she was that kid!
We already met so many times before.
How could I ever forget?
I felt like the universe was playing games with me.
How could this happen?
After all those years…
Why now?
Why her?
It almost felt like we were…
soulmates.
“How could we be soulmates, Mommy?
I don’t believe in those kinds of things!”
I couldn’t understand why Mommy was teasing us while we were putting the things in the back of the car because we were going home to Bataan to celebrate Christmas.
Shan was with us, which was why he was here.
“Honey, you’ve known each other ever since you were kids.
You even used to chase after him when you were little because he didn’t like you and you were naughty.” Mommy told the story.
“I don’t believe it!
I didn’t do that, Mommy!” I still denied it and crossed my arms over my chest.
I couldn’t remember that anymore!
It seemed weird to think that Shan and I had already met back then!
Weird!
“I was friends with his late mother… That kid has been through a lot.
I’m glad you met him again and brought him with us.” Mommy patted my shoulder.
“I’m glad to meet you, Sir.” I heard Shan say from the side of the car, so I peeked.
I saw that he had already met Daddy.
“I heard you were a painter… I looked up your works.
They were so great.
I loved them.”
“Wow, thank you, Shan.” Daddy laughed.
“Do you want to see some of them in person?
I have them in the art room.
We still have time before traveling.”
“Sure, Sir.
I would love to.” Shan was so respectful.
Too much, actually.
Daddy wanted it to be casual.
“Just call me Tito.
Sir sounds a little weird to hear.
It makes you sound like my student.” Daddy joked before they went to Shan’s art room.
I followed them to join them and make sure Shan wouldn’t feel uncomfortable in our house.
When I entered, Daddy was already showing my paintings from when I was little!
“Daddy!” I immediately ran and blocked what he was pointing at.
He even showed the embarrassing ones.
“Kierra started young.
Even when she was little, she already really liked drawing all sorts of things.” Daddy continued telling the story of my life.
“There was one time, I was painting a very beautiful piece, then she thought it was hers and that she could touch it… She turned the people into unicorns and put a rainbow around them.
It was meant to be a dark concept…”
Daddy even showed that one, so he and Shan laughed.
I pouted and glared at them.
“But I tried to fix it.
Instead of getting angry, I just acknowledged that what she did was beautiful because for her… it’s still art.
I don’t want to limit Kierra’s imagination.
I combined our work.
It turned out to be better.”
“You are such a great father, Tito.” Shan said.
“How admirable.
This is why Kierra grew up to be such an amazing person.”
Shan knew his way to my parents’ hearts!
He knew exactly what Daddy and Mommy wanted to hear.
So they were very happy with him!
“Daddy, let’s go.
We’ll arrive late if you keep doing that.” I reminded him.
Finally, they stopped talking about me and just got into the car.
Shan and I were in the back while Daddy was the driver and Mommy was in the seat next to him.
Shan was talking with my mother so smoothly that it was as if he were their son.
“Are you living alone now?” Mommy asked.
“Yes, Tita… I left my dad’s house when I went to college.”
“That’s good.
That’s actually so much better than living with your dad.” Mommy said.
So she knew about it!
“If you need anything, don’t hesitate to tell me, okay… Your mom would be so happy if she could just see you spending time with us on Christmas.”
“Kierra offered, and I also didn’t want to spend Christmas alone, so I hope it’s okay if I can join your vacation…” Shan politely said.
“Of course, Shan.
I’m glad you’re here with us!” Mommy said with a smile.
“You’ve grown so much!
It’s nice seeing you and Kierra together again, just like when you were kids.
Are you guys in a relationship?”
“No!” Shan and I answered at the same time, but his was calmer and even had a “po.” Mine was just more defensive.
“I told you, Mommy, we’re just friends.
Dad, we are just friends.” I told the two of them.
“Okay, dear… I just asked.” Mommy was even surprised at me when I suddenly shouted.
“It’s okay, Kierra.
Both of you, take your time to figure things out.”
I just leaned my head against the window, already sleepy.
Shan noticed that, so he put his hand beside my head and leaned me against his shoulder.
I just closed my eyes and fell asleep.
____________________________
When I woke up, we were already at a stopover.
I got down to use the restroom, and when I came out, Shan already handed me water that he bought for me at the convenience store.
He also bought me the ice cream that I liked.
We were just standing there while waiting for Mommy.
We were both wearing hoodies.
Mine was just more oversized and reached above my knees.
I offered him some of the ice cream and fed him using the small wooden spoon.
He nodded repeatedly and put his hand on top of my head to annoy me.
“Let’s cut your bangs already.” He said to me.
“They’re getting long.”
“Later.” I told him and fed him the ice cream again.
“You cut it?
Do you know how?” His hand was still on top of my head.
It was as if it was just resting there.
“Of course.
I can do anything.” He bragged to me.
I laughed and lightly pinched his waist, so he moved away from me, also laughing.
“Kierra, Shan, let’s go!” Mommy called us, so we went back to the car.
It took about another two hours before we arrived at the resort.
Mommy and Daddy shared one room, while Shan and I had one room each.
I arranged my things first and took a short nap.
Afterwards, we just had dinner outside and returned to the resort again.
“If that’s short, you’re dead.”
Shan and I were on the balcony of my room because he was cutting my bangs.
“Fix it, okay.
I’m nervous about you.”
“Shush, I’m concentrating.” He said.
I closed my eyes when he started cutting it.
He fixed it a little more before combing it again and cutting it.
Afterwards, he brushed the hair off my clothes before I opened my eyes and looked in the mirror.
“Wow, it’s even, huh!
Good job!” I gave him a thumbs up.
“How many times have you done this?”
“First time.
I’m just too good.” He grinned while fixing my bangs using his fingers.
“There.
I could finally see your eyes better.
How pretty.” He said while staring at my face.
I bit my lower lip and looked away, holding back my smile.
“You?
I’ll cut yours too, are you okay with that?”
“Sure.”
I was surprised when he immediately agreed.
He even sat on the other chair, ready to get his hair cut.
“Come on.
Do what you want with me.” He joked.
“I don’t want to.
I don’t know how!
Your haircut might become ugly.
It’s so beautiful as it is.”
His hair was beautiful.
It wasn’t too short and wasn’t long either.
It was just right and suited him.
____________________________
“Do you want to take pictures tomorrow?” He asked me.
“I can take pictures of you.”
“I’m not photogenic.” I told him and even laughed.
“I look ugly in pictures.
I don’t like my face.”
Ever since that incident happened, I couldn’t look at myself the same way.
I was afraid to look at myself.
I said it before and was already making progress, but it was still a little hard to look in the mirror.
“I always love how you look like.” He said.
“And you look even more exceptionally beautiful in person.”
I laughed.
“Fine then.
Just a few pictures.”
“I’ll accompany you.” He offered.
That made me feel better, so I nodded.
I felt shy when I was alone.
I actually had more pictures with my friends.
It was just hard if it was only me.
Because the focus was on me.
______________________________
The next day, I stared in the mirror and smiled at myself.
I looked… okay.
I started putting on make-up and even dressed up to make myself feel better.
I was wearing navy blue long sleeves and a brown long skirt.
Shan said he wanted to match me so it would look better in photos, so he wore a white turtleneck, a navy blue jacket, and a pair of brown pants.
It was too early, so the sun wasn’t that hot yet.
“Wow.
Gorgeous.” He said when he saw me.
“Thank you.” I said shyly.
He was setting up the camera.
“Do you want to take solo pictures first?
I like your outfit.”
“Uhm… If you’re going to have your picture taken too.” I said.
He agreed, so I stood in front of the camera with the beach behind me.
I didn’t know what to do, so I smiled when he took the photo.
When he looked at it, he also smiled.
“Is it okay?” I asked.
“Yes, you look so lovely.
One more.” He said.
I felt relieved and more comfortable taking another photo.
I faced sideways for a bit and smiled at the camera.
I took three more photos before I took his.
He just smiled without showing his teeth and then went sideways, and then I took a photo of his back.
“It’s like a mugshot, huh.” I said to him.
He laughed and took the camera again to put it on the stand, but we both got surprised when we saw that Mommy was already awake to go jogging.
She offered to take pictures of us because she said our outfits were cute.
We were still shy in the first photo.
“Closer.
You look like you’re enemies” Mommy said.
Shan came closer to me and put his arm around me, and then we smiled at the camera.
After that, we faced the beach.
I bumped Shan’s hips when I picked up a shell, so he also lightly bumped me back.
I glared at him when I faced him, and he laughed and pinched my cheek.
I forgot that Mommy was taking pictures.
I immediately moved away and walked closer to look at the shot.
They looked cute.
That night, we had a bonfire because my cousins arrived.
I introduced Shan to them.
They were all younger than me, so he immediately got along with them too.
They were mischievous kids and only wanted to have a bonfire to cook marshmallows.
Shan was carrying my little cousin when they came back because they got a hotdog stick.
“Let me hold it.
You might hurt yourself.” He gently said to the child and took the stick.
“Who wants some hotdogs?” He loudly asked the others, and my cousins immediately went to him.
“Me, Kuya Shan!
Me, me!” Shan gave each of them one while I was just sitting on the mat, holding the camera.
I was taking photos of my surroundings.
The bonfire, the sea, and then now, Shan and my cousins.
When he got tired, Shan just sat beside me, already out of breath from playing with my cousins.
He rested his head on my shoulder while I was eating marshmallows.
I also fed him one because he might already be hungry.
We were just waiting for the noche buena to finish being prepared.
When we were called, we put out the fire from the bonfire and went to the long table on the sand to eat and countdown for Christmas.
Shan also made a good impression with my Tita’s and Tito’s.
“Are you Ate Ayi’s boyfriend?” My little cousin innocently asked.
“Oh, no, I’m not…” Shan just laughed and squeezed the child’s cheek.
“Why are you asking?”
“Because I like Kuya Shan!
You’re nice!
Come to Bataan all the time!”
“Kuya Shan is busy studying…” I immediately silenced my cousin.
“He’s only available during Christmas break.”
“He’s your boyfriend, though!
Ayieee!” My other cousins continued insisting.
I just shook my head and got some food.
They wouldn’t stop teasing because they’re children.
“What do you want?
I’ll get it for you.” I offered Shan because he was just sitting there, letting everyone else get food first because he was shy.
“It’s fine.” He stood up and took the plate from my hand.
“I’m just waiting for them to finish.”
It might run out, so I just got food and a drink for him.
After eating, we started the countdown for Christmas.
“3… 2… 1… Merry Christmas!” We were even holding sparklers as if it were New Year.
“Merry Christmas!” I turned to Shan to greet him.
He held my waist to support my back because I bumped into his chest.
“Merry Christmas.” He greeted back and smiled at me.
“Thanks for bringing me here.”
“I told you, you’d enjoy it here, eh!” I smiled and even scrunched my nose while holding onto his waist and looking up at him.
He let out a small laugh before hugging me tightly and caressing my hair.
I was surprised but just accepted it too, even while wondering what that was for.
“I’m glad you’re happy.” I heard him whisper before letting go of the hug.
“I am, too.” I just gave him a cute smile that made him touch his chest, acting like he was hit by something.
“Ah, an arrow hit my heart.” He joked.
I laughed and lightly hit him on the chest before running toward my cousins.
Shan followed, also holding a sparkler.
We even had gift-giving before getting tired and returning to our respective rooms.
I just changed into pajamas and went out onto the balcony to get some air.
After a while, Shan also came out and was surprised when he saw me there.
Our rooms were right next to each other.
He went to the end of the balcony to be closer to me and leaned there.
“I couldn’t prepare a gift for you, so I’ll give something tomorrow.” He told me.
“Me too, so don’t bother!” I also went to the end so we could understand each other better.
He looked around and saw the pots of flowers on the side of the balcony.
He picked one and handed it to me.
I laughed and took it to put it by my ear.
“Thank you!” I said.
“Did you sleep better last night?” He asked me.
I smiled and nodded at him.
“I didn’t have a nightmare.
It’s disappearing now.” I told him.
“I really hope so because it’s Christmas.
I want to have a break from everything.”
“Hmm, did you see your photos?” He changed the topic.
“Yes!
They looked great.
Thank you…” It actually wasn’t that bad.
I thought I looked good there.
“Our pictures are cute too.
Mommy said she’s going to have one of them framed.”
“Your mom’s amazing.
What a kind person.” He praised.
“It has been a while since someone took care of me.”
I also asked how he was doing, and he said that he was happy and didn’t feel uncomfortable with my family.
He just missed his mom a little, but he wasn’t sad about it.
We just talked until I got sleepy and we said goodbye to each other.
____________________________
Good mood.
Dad bought matching Christmas sweaters for us and even bought one for Shan this morning.
Shan wasn’t there for breakfast.
They said he left early for a while.
I was just lying on the couch in my room while resting after eating when someone knocked.
When I opened the door, a large bouquet of flowers appeared in front of me.
The colors were beautiful.
“Merry Christmas.” Shan said when I took the flowers.
“Here’s my real gift.” He handed me a box of cinnamon rolls and a drink.
“Christmas special.
I made them.”
“Wow, thank you!
What about me?!
I have nothing to give!” I ended up feeling pressured.
“You brought me here.
That’s already your gift for me.
You don’t need to give me anything.”
“This is it!
Ta-da!” I gave him the Christmas sweater that Daddy bought.
“You should wear it because we’ll take family pictures later!”
“I’m not part of your family.” He said confusedly.
“Well… You’re part of my life now.” I said.
“Right?
So go and wear it!”
“Oh, to be a part of your life…” He put his hand on his chest and closed his eyes, letting his head fall against the doorframe.
“Alright.”
I went back to the room and got my phone to answer the group video call in the group chat.
My friends just greeted me Merry Christmas.
Theo also called to greet me.
“Merry Christmas!
Where did you celebrate?” I asked him.
[We’re in Subic.] He said.
[You’re in Bataan, right?
Turns out we’re just nearby.]
“Oh?
Come here!” I laughed.
“Turns out we’re just nearby.”
[Are you going to feed me there if I come?]
“Of course!
Mommy is even looking for you!” I continued persuading him.
“It’s just a short drive, come on!
Bring Tita too.”
[No, it’s embarrassing.
I’ll just go.
I’ll only stay for a while anyway.]
“Yay, okay!
See you!” I ended the call and went out to tell Mommy that Theo was coming.
This is so fun!