12: Chapter 11: Real Life Pokémon Battle!
12: Chapter 11: Real Life Pokémon Battle!
Chapter 11: Real Life Pokémon Battle!
The Poké Ball hit the ground, and in a flash of light, a Skarmory fully clad in silver armor, with wings as sharp as blades and eyes brimming with wild defiance, made its grand entrance!
[Skarmory Level: 58] “Skar-kaaa!” Skarmory unfurled its wings and let out a piercing screech, its powerful aura instantly flooding the entire Gym.
Having been completely arrogant just a second ago, Sean instinctively took a step back as he felt this overwhelming pressure.
Even Gengar’s body shuddered slightly: “Ke-giah?
(I’m supposed to fight *that* Skarmory?)” Sean reacted instantly.
Having fully anticipated this kind of scenario, he assumed the posture of a nagging middle-aged lady and strongly condemned Falkner: “Holy mother of peak, do you have any professional ethics at all?!
You’re sending out your main ace against a rookie of rookies—someone who doesn’t even have a single Badge, let alone official Trainer status?
Believe it or not, I will report you to the League and get you fired!” As Sean spoke, he gently patted Cyndaquil, who was still holding the phone on his shoulder, emphasizing: “I’m recording all of this, so don’t even think about denying it!” “Wait, what?” Staring at Sean’s barrage of righteous indignation, Falkner froze in his tracks.
But the League did indeed have strict regulations: Gym Leaders had to adjust the battle’s difficulty based on the challenger’s Badge count, keeping it primarily instructional.
And so…
Under the immense weight of these rules, Falkner shut his eyes in agony, recalling his fully powered Skarmory with absolute reluctance.
He nearly ground his molars to dust before managing to hurl a standard red-and-white Poké Ball.
“Tch, you win!” With a flash of light, the second baby Pokémon suited for a beginner battle appeared on the field— A Doduo with two heads, looking like a juvenile ostrich, its eyes equally naive and confused.
[Doduo Level: 10] Staring at the “frail” Doduo, which looked just as pathetic as Pidgey, Sean and Gengar erupted once more into a synchronized, wicked cackle!
Sean: “Hehehehe…” Gengar: “Ke-hehe-hehe…” Doduo trembled violently, utterly terrified by the creepy laughter and the clearly ill-intentioned Gengar before it!
It turned its heads back timidly to look at its Trainer, its eyes practically crying out: “I’m supposed to fight that Gengar?!” Although Falkner couldn’t bear to watch, he ruthlessly turned his head away.
Dammit, all because of those stupid Gym rules!
Among Sean’s very few defining traits, bullying the weak and picking on the small were definitely at the top of the list: “The strong must ruthlessly humiliate the weak, baby!” *SMACK!
SMACK!* Same recipe, same flavor.
Gengar instantly blurred right in front of Doduo and delivered two sharp slaps.
“Dod…
dod…” Doduo instantly burst into tears, turning around and sprinting behind Falkner to curl up in a ball alongside Pidgey, sobbing uncontrollably.
“I’m sorry!” Falkner quickly recalled them into their Poké Balls, unable to bear the sight anymore—even a single glance felt like absolute torture.
He then tremblingly threw out his third and final baby Pokémon suited for a beginner battle— A sleepy-eyed Hoothoot that looked like a juvenile owl.
[Hoothoot Level: 10] The result was completely identical.
Two slaps, and it fled behind Falkner in floods of tears.
The referee’s cheek twitched.
Having watched these three copy-and-paste battles, he was completely past the point of frustration.
He could only wave his flag with a sigh and announce: “Hoothoot is unable to battle!
The winner is Sean from New Bark Town!” “Heck yeah!” Sean leaped into the air, sharing a high-five with Gengar.
Falkner kept his head low, his face completely shadowed with dark lines.
The “speed and sincerity” he pursued had been utterly trampled by Sean.
He wanted nothing more than to make sure Sean never walked out of this Gym door on his own two feet!
Feeling as if he had just eaten a pound of garbage, Falkner used every ounce of his remaining strength to tremblingly hand the Zephyr Badge over to Sean.
Sean snatched the Badge, flaunted it in front of Cyndaquil and Gengar, and slipped it into his pocket.
Then, he slung an arm around Falkner’s shoulder, speaking to him with deep gravity, as if Falkner were the challenger here: “Do you know where the Violet Gym is?” Falkner: “?” Sean: “Right here, little bro!” Falkner didn’t understand what Sean meant at first, but his sharp mind caught on immediately!
Falkner’s rage +999 +999 +999…
He snapped his head up, his eyes completely bloodshot as veins popped along his arms.
“Holy mother of crap!” Falkner completely snapped.
He had never seen such a colossally shameless human being in his entire life!
To rely on a high-level Gengar to steamroll his baby Pokémon, and then have the f***ing audacity to turn around and mock him?!
*You inherently evil brat!
If I don’t beat the crap out of you today, my name isn’t Falkner!* Just as Falkner’s fist—as large as a sandbag—was about to smash into Sean’s face, Sean, who had fully anticipated this, casually tilted his head to dodge the strike.
“Muda~ muda~” Seeing that the situation was about to escalate into a “real-life” Pokémon battle, the referee finally rushed over and locked Falkner in a desperate bearhug from behind.
Falkner thrashed his arms and legs in mid-air, completely losing his composure.
The referee shot Sean a frantic look, gesturing for him to run.
“Hehehe, thanks, uncle!
Gengar, Cyndaquil, let’s bolt!” Having already grown entirely accustomed to running away, Sean’s crew vanished without a trace in a single instant.
A few moments later, the referee finally let Falkner down after seeing him calm down slightly.
“Dammit!
If I ever see you again, I’ll make sure you get exactly what’s coming to you!!!” Falkner’s enraged roar echoed through the Violet Gym for a long time.
The referee could only rub his temples in utter defeat.
“What an absolute menace…” …
…
Having run a massive distance away, Sean finally came to a halt, throwing his hands into the air as he cheered: “Wooohooo!
So satisfying!” But the very next second…
*CLACK!* Sean felt a chilly sensation snap around his wrists.
He spun his head around to find a pair of shiny silver handcuffs firmly locked in place.
Beside him stood an incredibly gorgeous Officer Jenny with teal hair and a police uniform, smiling warmly at him.
???!
*Holy crap, karma caught up this fast!* A stampede of ten thousand Tauros roared through Sean’s mind as wild thoughts flashed frantically: *It’s over, I’m completely cooked!* *Did they trace the Ruins of Alph collapse back to me, or did someone report me for selling those “Evil-Dispelling Talismans” in the forest?!* And just like that, a terrified Sean was escorted back to the station…
On his shoulder, Cyndaquil kept its head low, its face filled with the complex, resigned expression of “what goes around comes around.” Gengar, entirely oblivious, merely scratched its head in confusion.
Inside the interrogation room, the atmosphere was incredibly tense.
*SLAM!* Officer Jenny slammed her hand flat against the table, demanding: “Sean!
Do you know why I brought you here?
Do you have any idea what you did wrong?!” Sean first shook his head, but seeing Officer Jenny’s expression shift slightly, he immediately nodded vigorously.
Having absolutely no cards to play, his only option was to adopt the ultimate strategy—absolute surrender!
“I know I was wrong, Officer Jenny!
I’m deeply reflecting on my actions!
Please give me a chance to turn over a new leaf!” Seeing Sean’s sincere attitude, Officer Jenny finally nodded in satisfaction.
Right then, the door to the interrogation room was pushed open, and a familiar figure walked inside.
“Thank you for your hard work, Officer Jenny.
I’ll take it from here.” The newcomer was none other than Professor Elm.
Professor Elm walked over to Sean, who was currently hanging his head in apology.
Crossing his arms, a smug, triumphant grin spread across the Professor’s face: “Fought against me, did you?
Didn’t expect this, did you?
In the end, didn’t you still wind up right in my hands?” Sean blinked.
Realizing something, he asked experimentally: “Officer Jenny arrested me…
just because I raided your kitchen?!” “Exactly!
The evidence is rock-solid, so don’t even try denying it!” “Phew—” Hearing this answer, the ten thousand stampeding Tauros in Sean’s mind instantly ground to a halt.
The folds of his cerebral cortex were gently smoothed out, as if he were taking a peaceful stroll through a Norwegian forest.
All of his thoughts were scattered by a gentle breeze; his anxiety and worries dissolved into a smooth, blank slate.
Time stood still in this moment as the noise drifted away, and warm sunlight shone into his heart, dispelling the gloom.
His confusion and stress were gently wiped away by an invisible hand, leaving behind nothing but relaxation and absolute freedom…
*So getting dragged to the police station was literally just for a lecturing!* *Scared the absolute crap out of me.
I thought I was going to be eating prison food for the rest of my life!* Sean’s sincere attitude vanished without a trace in a single microsecond, replaced instantly by his usual slack-jawed, lazy demeanor.
He crossed his legs, leaned back against the chair, and fished around in his ear with his pinky finger, speaking with utter leisure: “Oh~ so that’s all it was.
Professor, if you don’t have anything else, you can leave first.
I’d like to chat with the beautiful Officer Jenny a bit longer.” ???
The smug grin on Professor Elm’s face vanished instantly, leaving him completely dumbfounded.
“Uh…
yeah, go ahead.” “Wait, wait, wait!” Professor Elm started to panic.
“What is wrong with you, kid?!
The script wasn’t written like this at all!
Aren’t you supposed to sincerely apologize to me now, and then I’ll graciously mediate with the police, after which you’ll become a good kid, and I can naturally hand you a Pokédex and apply to the League for a special exemption to register you as an official Trainer?!” This was the exact scenario he had rehearsed in his mind countless times.
“Look at you, getting all worked up again.” Sean looked at Professor Elm with an expression reserved for absolute fools, feeling thoroughly helpless.
Standing to the side, Officer Jenny was trying her best to maintain her professional law-enforcer seriousness, but the corners of her mouth were twitching violently.
*We are professionally trained.