9: Chapter 8: I’m Going to Be Filthy Rich!
9: Chapter 8: I’m Going to Be Filthy Rich!
Chapter 8: I’m Going to Be Filthy Rich!
“Hehehehe…
Who’s next?” Sean walked toward the left stone wall with a wicked grin, then suddenly jumped to the right.
His completely unhinged shenanigans instantly stirred up a hornet’s nest!
*Whoosh!
Whoosh!
Whoosh!* The Unown inside the other three stone walls (shaped like the letters “B”, “C”, and “D”) couldn’t sit still any longer.
They bolted out of the walls in an instant—there was absolutely no way they were going to get peed on like “A”!
Fueled by a mixture of rage and sheer panic, the Unown began gathering psychic energy, locking their targets onto Sean!
“Coming right at us, perfect!
That’s exactly the reaction I wanted!
Cyndaquil, Flamethrower!
Gengar, Shadow Ball!” Sean immediately ordered Cyndaquil and Gengar to launch their attacks.
A pillar of blazing fire erupted from Cyndaquil’s mouth once more, while Gengar, having finally regained a fraction of its life force, conjured a Shadow Ball between its hands and hurled it forward.
*BOOM!
BOOM!* The two attacks struck the three Unown mid-air head-on, triggering a violent explosion!
“Gyaaa!” The three Unown wailed in unison, crashing to the ground like kites with their strings cut, completely knocked out.
The final trace of translucency vanished from Gengar’s body as its form solidified entirely.
Although its strength was still nowhere near half of its peak, it would slowly recover with the passage of time.
Floating in mid-air, it looked down at Sean, its eyes swimming with an indescribable wave of gratitude.
Sean was just about to buckle his belt and strike a cool pose in front of Gengar and Cyndaquil when an unexpected situation occurred!
*Crack…
Crunch…* The sound of shattering stone echoed through the chamber.
The walls that had been held together by the power of the Unown were suddenly covered in jagged, pitch-black fractures like lightning bolts!
Debris and dust began raining down on Sean’s head, and the entire ruins started to tremble violently!
“Shoot, this place is caving in!” “Ke-giah!
(Don’t panic!)” Gengar grabbed Sean by his collar with one hand and snagged Cyndaquil by the scruff of its neck with the other.
Its Levitate ability triggered instantly as it rocketed out of the ruins.
A few moments later— *RUMBLE—!!!* An earth-shattering roar echoed through the area.
The entire central core of the Ruins of Alph collapsed into a mountain of rubble in a single instant, sending a colossal cloud of yellow dust billowing into the sky!
The violent tremor rippled all the way to the distant tourist area.
The boiling tea the security guard had been leisurely sipping sloshed right out of his cup, drenching him completely.
“Holy mother of crap!” The noisy crowds of tourists fell dead silent.
Everyone looked in unison toward the central core of the Ruins of Alph—a structure that had stood tall for thousands of years, now completely obscured by a massive shroud of yellow dust.
“Good lord, what just happened?” “The ruins…
the ruins just collapsed?!” …
“Too close, way too close!” Dangling in mid-air from Gengar’s grip, Sean patted his own chest.
“Who knew those four walls were actually load-bearing walls?
We almost got buried alive.” He let out a massive sigh of relief.
But as he celebrated surviving the disaster, he suddenly felt a chilly breeze brushing against his legs.
The gentle wind brought with it an unprecedented sensation of absolute freedom.
Sean instinctively looked down, only to find that his long pants were completely missing.
His legs were exposed entirely bare to the open air, leaving him in nothing but a pair of boxers printed with a dorky Donphan pattern!
!!!
“Holy crap, where are my pants?!” Sean realized it in a flash.
He hadn’t had time to buckle his belt before Gengar dragged him out of the ruins, and the sheer speed must have sent his pants flying right off inside the cave!
Immediately after, a terrifying scenario played out in his mind…
A stern Officer Jenny, while investigating the cause of the collapse, carefully pulls a dusty pair of pants out from underneath the rubble.
She stares at the pants blankly for a second, before utilizing her detective instincts to follow the clues straight to his doorstep!
A youth named Sean had not only trespassed into a restricted ruins zone, but had also utilized unknown methods to cause the entire structure to collapse!
And then came the cold silver handcuffs, followed by a life of eating prison food—plenty of it, but zero freedom!
“No way, absolutely not!” Sean’s face turned completely green with fear.
“Gengar, get us out of here!
As far away as possible!” Gengar, who had been busy poking fun at Sean’s boxers alongside Cyndaquil, snapped back to reality instantly.
It flew him straight into the dense forest bordering the outer perimeter of the ruins.
The second they hit the ground, Sean zipped open his backpack with a loud *rip*, frantically rummaging around inside until he fished out a spare pair of pants.
He hopped on one leg, pulling them on at lightning speed.
“…Wait a minute.
The pants I dropped in the ruins were just a trendy pair I bought online.
Tons of people wear stuff like that.
If they actually manage to trace it back to me, I’ll just take the L.
You guys are honestly too good,” Sean muttered to himself.
They couldn’t possibly target him just because he was too handsome, right?
Calming down, Sean pulled his screen-shattered yet remarkably resilient phone out of his pocket, wincing in pain at the damage.
“Well, there’s no way this vlog is ever going up.
Posting it would basically be giving a full confession that I’m the culprit!
Is Big Papa peaking right at his debut, only to go straight to jail immediately after?” Sean managed a bitter laugh.
Once his panic subsided, his stomach began to betray him, letting out a series of loud, demanding rumbles.
He hadn’t eaten a single thing since morning!
“Forget it, the top priority right now is to feed the beast!” Sean’s wicked brain began spinning at Mach speed, racking his mind for a way to make some fast cash!
A moment later, his gaze swept over Gengar, and a sudden stroke of genius hit him.
A devious smile crept onto his face.
“Hehehehe…” Gengar felt a sudden chill run down its spine: “Ke-giah?
(What are you planning?)” …
A few minutes later.
At the entrance of the forest.
An incredibly crude makeshift stall had been set up.
The vendor wore a messy white wig and a matching fake beard, looking exactly like a shady street-side fortune teller.
It was, of course, a disguised Sean!
[LanLi: Green?!
(Pokemon Adventures)] Spread across the table in front of him were a few sheets of yellow paper covered in squiggly charcoal designs.
To add an extra layer of ancient authenticity and mystical power, he had deliberately had Cyndaquil control the flames on its back to singe the edges, artificially aging the paper.
Finally, he set up a wooden sign bearing four bold words: [Evil-Dispelling Talisman]!
“Step right up, take a look!
Don’t miss out, folks!
An ancestral secret talisman, specially made to counter forest ghosts and ghouls, guaranteed to keep you safe!
Not 99.9, but yours today for just 99!” Sean hollered at the top of his lungs.
Before long, a young girl with a deathly pale face came scrambling out of the forest, practically rolling on the ground.
Seeing Sean’s stall was like spotting a savior.
She threw her entire body onto the table!
“A-A ghost!
There’s a ghost in the forest!
Is this talisman of yours really going to work?” the girl stammered, entirely shaken.
“Guaranteed, sis!
An ancestral secret talisman.
If it doesn’t work, you can get a full refund!” Without a shred of hesitation, the girl whipped out a 100-Pokédollar bill, telling him he could keep the change.
Sean snatched the bill instantly: “Thank you for your business, hope to see you again soon~” Clutching the “Evil-Dispelling Talisman” tightly like a lifeline, the girl gathered her courage and stepped back into the forest.
Watching her figure disappear, Sean leaned back against his chair, flicking the 100-Pokédollar bill between his fingers.
He finally couldn’t hold it in any longer and let out a muffled, sinister “Hehehehe” chuckle.
And this laughter blended perfectly with the creepy “Ke-hehe” cackles echoing from deep within the forest, creating a brilliant duet that only the two of them could truly appreciate!
That’s right—this was Sean’s absolute stroke of genius!
Let Gengar, who loved playing pranks and scaring people anyway, completely unleash its inner nature inside the forest!
Meanwhile, he would stay outside selling “Evil-Dispelling Talismans” to make money!
One was responsible for manufacturing the demand, while the other was responsible for providing the solution.
Furthermore, he had already coordinated with Gengar: anyone carrying the talisman paper would be allowed to walk out of the forest completely unharmed.
Therefore, there was absolutely no risk of the talisman being labeled a fake, meaning no one would ever come back demanding a refund!
It was a flawless business loop!
“Hehehehe, I’m going to be filthy rich!” Sean counted the growing stack of bills in his hand, his wicked laughter echoing at the forest entrance.
“If we pull this off a few more times, I won’t even have to lick the foil lid when I drink yogurt anymore!
Can you guys even begin to imagine how luxurious of a life that is?!” Sean said, thoroughly satisfied.
Cyndaquil looked at his scheming face, completely unable to bear the sight.
Why on earth had it chosen this guy to be its Trainer in the first place…?
…
As the final “Evil-Dispelling Talisman” was sold, Sean decided to quit while he was ahead before their cover blew, quickly stripping off his disguise and hitting the road!
He patted his bulging wallet and said: “Let’s go.
Your boy Sean is taking you guys to a restaurant today.
We’re eating good!” …
…
Meanwhile.
At the outer perimeter of the Ruins of Alph.
A tall, breathtakingly beautiful woman with waist-length blonde hair, dressed in a sleek black coat, froze solid as she stared at the scene before her…
The ruins had been completely reduced to a mountain of rubble, with several police officers setting up yellow tape, actively investigating the cause of the collapse.
Cynthia had endured a day and a night on a plane traveling all the way from the Sinnoh region to the Johto region, having already coordinated with the local League to enter the Ruins of Alph for archaeological research.
Her heart, which had been brimming with anticipation, shattered as she stared at the rubble.
She dropped to her knees on the spot, propping herself up with her hands, practically on the verge of tears.
“This has to be an illusion…” “Lucar.” Lucario burst out from its Poké Ball, helping her up and offering a few words of comfort.
“Thank you, Lucario.” Right at that exact microsecond, Lucario’s Aura detection picked up a slight anomaly.
It reached into the rubble and pulled out a pair of pants…