"Josh! Quick question!" I said, pointing dramatically at Joseph. We were sitting in our usual corner of the campus cafeteria, trying to enjoy lunch before our afternoon classes.
Joseph didn't even bother looking at me. He calmly chewed another bite of food before lazily raising his eyes. "What?"
I leaned forward with a smug grin. "Did you know sanitary pads have wings?"
He stared at me for a moment. "Okay... what was so amazing about that?"
"You didn't know, huh?" I smirked triumphantly.
"Congratulations," he replied flatly. "Now you can fly. Wow."
"Tch." I clicked my tongue. "That's not what I meant."
I leaned closer and lowered my voice as if I were about to reveal a top secret government conspiracy. "Periods are really no joke, man."
Joseph looked at me without changing his expression. "You were just talking about wings a minute ago."
"I was building suspense."
He quietly took another bite of his lunch.
I let out a long sigh before resting my chin on my hand. "I've honestly started regretting why I ever wished to become a girl. If I'd known period cramps were this horrible, I would've never dared to make that wish."
Joseph swallowed his food before looking at me again. "Where's the Kaoru who kept talking about how there was a bright side to becoming a girl?"
"I admit..." I sighed dramatically. "I was too naive." I pointed my chopsticks at him like a wise old master passing down sacred knowledge. "That's why I'm telling you this now."
He raised an eyebrow.
"When you finally get a girlfriend..."
"Imaginary or real?"
"Both." I nodded seriously. "You'd better treat her properly."
Joseph looked genuinely confused. "Why are you suddenly giving relationship advice?"
"Because women have been fighting invisible demons every month!" I slapped the table dramatically. "And we men have been completely clueless!"
A few nearby students glanced at our table before returning to their meals.
Joseph sighed. "Okay. I got it."
Satisfied, I nodded. "Good."
He took another sip of his drink before changing the topic. "So... did you manage to fix things with Kazuha?"
I immediately stopped chewing.
Slowly... I turned toward him with the most serious expression I could manage, then I nodded.
Joseph narrowed his eyes. "Really? Didn't you say Operation Umbrella ended in complete disaster?"
"How dare you doubt me?" I puffed out my chest proudly. "The operation itself may have failed..." I raised a finger dramatically. "But the ending was a complete success."
"Oh?"
"Kazuha..." I placed a hand over my heart. "My queen..."
Joseph immediately looked unconvinced.
"Took care of me when I got sick."
His eyebrows rose slightly.
"She even bought medicine for me."
"Really?"
"And bread."
Joseph blinked.
"And..." I couldn't stop myself from smiling. "She even helped me choose sanitary pads."
Joseph stared at me as though he was trying to decide whether I was lying.
"I even asked her if she thought I could get pregnant now."
Joseph nearly spat out his drink.
Several students around us immediately looked in our direction.
Only then did I realize my voice might have been a little too loud. "W-Wait!" I hurriedly waved both hands. "Don't get me wrong, Josh! I don't want to get pregnant!"
Joseph continued coughing.
"I was just curious about my biology!"
Finally, he managed to breathe again. "Why would you even ask that?"
"Because nobody teaches this stuff!" I crossed my arms. "Besides, she's one of the few people who knows about my situation, and she's a girl. Who else was I supposed to ask?"
Then I looked at him suspiciously before hugging myself dramatically. "And besides... I need to protect myself from a perverted guy like you."
Joseph slowly looked at me with complete disgust. "Excuse me?"
"You never know. I've become a beautiful young woman now. What if you suddenly lose control?"
He silently stared at me for several seconds before standing up with his tray.
"W-Wait." I grabbed his sleeve. "Where are you going?"
He looked at me with complete seriousness. "I'm going to stay away from the delusional girl who just had her first period."
"Hey!" Before I could stop him, another familiar voice interrupted us.
"Oh? Kaoru?"
I turned around.
Niina stood beside our table carrying her lunch tray. Her usual bright smile made it feel like the cafeteria had suddenly become a little livelier. "Can I sit here?"
"Oh!" I quickly nodded. "Sure."
She happily placed her tray beside mine before taking a seat.
Joseph, meanwhile, was still standing awkwardly with his tray in his hands.
"What was that?" Niina tilted her head curiously. "I'm sorry if I overheard... but did you just say you had your first period?"
My face instantly turned bright red. From beside me, I heard Joseph let out a quiet gasp.
"Josh..." I muttered, turning toward him.
"I thought you were leaving," I said flatly, my voice dripping with sarcasm.
"H-Huh?" Joseph stuttered.
Niina finally noticed him. "Oh." She smiled politely. "Is he your friend?"
I nodded. "Yeah."
The moment she smiled at him, Joseph suddenly stood up straighter. The gloomy, annoyed Joseph from a moment ago completely disappeared.
"I'm Joseph!" he said with an unusually bright smile. "N-Nice to meet you!" He pointed at me. "I'm his..." His expression froze. "I mean... Her friend. Hehe..."
I slowly clicked my tongue.
Niina simply smiled warmly. "I'm Niina. It's nice to meet you."
Joseph quickly put his tray back on the table before sitting down again.
Then Niina turned back toward me with the same curious expression as before. "So... Kaoru. You really just had your first period?"
I let out a defeated sigh. She really wasn't going to let that go, huh?
I nodded shyly.
She thought about it for a moment before quietly mumbling to herself. "You're a little late for puberty..." Then she immediately shook her head. "But that's not really important." She looked at me apologetically. "Sorry if I'm asking something too personal. But you helped me before, so I wanted to help you this time."
For a moment, I simply stared at her. Then, with the enthusiasm of someone explaining her favorite hobby, Niina began giving me all sorts of advice about periods. She talked about warm drinks, heating pads, painkillers, stretching, and foods that might help with the cramps.
Meanwhile, I listened with complete seriousness, opening the notes app on my phone and typing down every single thing she said. If I was going to experience those cramps every month... This information was priceless.
Niina smiled after seeing me diligently typing everything into my phone. "You're taking notes?"
I looked up proudly. "Of course. If I'm going to suffer through this every month, I need all the help I can get."
She let out a soft giggle. "You're funny." She smiled warmly. "I didn't expect you to take this so seriously."
"I have to." I nodded solemnly. "This is a matter of survival."
She laughed again before tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "You know..." she said softly, "when we first met, I thought you were just a really kind person."
"Huh?"
"But after talking to you more..." Her smile grew a little brighter. "You're actually really funny too."
I blinked. "I'll take that as a compliment."
"It is." She nodded happily before taking out her phone. "By the way, Kaoru..."
"Hm?"
"Could we exchange phone numbers? I'd like us to be friends."
...
My brain crashed. A blue screen would've been less dramatic. "Me...?"
She nodded. "You helped me a lot before, and..." A faint blush appeared on her cheeks as she smiled shyly. "I think you're really kind... so..."
She... She wanted my phone number? More importantly... She was the one who asked first?!
I took a slow, deep breath, desperately trying to calm myself before I ruined the moment by grinning like a complete idiot. Stay calm, act cool, don't scare her. "O-Oh. Sure."
We exchanged phones and quickly added each other as contacts.
Seeing my name appear on her screen, Niina smiled with obvious satisfaction. "Great! Now I can help check on you next month too."
The dream shattered instantly. "Please don't remind me."
She burst into laughter, covering her mouth with both hands. "You really are funny, Kaoru."
My shoulders slumped, but I couldn't stop smiling.
A cute girl thought I was kind. She thought I was funny. She asked for my phone number.
For the first time in my eighteen years of life... A girl had asked for my number first.
Am I... Slowly becoming a romance protagonist?