It hurt.
I couldn’t even hold on to consciousness properly.
I must not lose consciousness. I must not let it slip away. Even as my own voice screamed somewhere deep inside my head, ringing in my eardrums, my flickering, blurred awareness was too disoriented to recognize my surroundings.
My head felt burning hot. The burning pain that started from my eyes spread to my head, then eventually throughout my entire body.
The clear realization that a part of my body—some part of me—was writhing in pain and dying.
Even as I wandered in unconsciousness that I could not control, that feeling came to me vividly enough to send chills down my spine. I was dying.
No. No.
I had to find the source of the pain and tear it out before it completely died… before that death could spread to my whole body. Even if it hurt enough to kill me, that source would remain like poison and eventually kill my entire body.
Where did it hurt?
Everywhere.
But surely it had to be there. The place that hurt the most. The place blocking my breath.
My consciousness, scanning gently over my arms, legs, damaged internal organs—all of it—slowly reached my head. The burning pain was starting from there. That place. The eye that was dying and screaming.
I grabbed my eye. Tried to tear it out. But someone grabbed my hand, stopping me from ripping it out.
Who’s blocking me? Who’s stopping me from keeping this pain?
Fierce anger fluttered inside the pain, but soon I had to give up even that. The pain was too severe to keep resisting.
Eyes. Eyes. Burning so hot it was unbearable, like being scorched in a hellfire.
But then.
Suddenly, I realized.
Only after finding the most painful spot did I realize that this wasn’t really the place that hurt the most.
The eyes? This feeling, like being stabbed with a hot skewer? This much I could endure. Even if it choked me with pain, it wasn’t the kind of pain that would make me lose my mind. I never had such a weak mind.
What hurt most was…
The heart.
The mind. The head. The spirit. Reason. The very foundation of all of these: pride, self-esteem, the root of who I was. The pain piercing into my body as if to kill it was aiming straight for my heart.
The pride that had always looked straight ahead without ever looking up or down, and the self-esteem that had lived unacknowledged but strong inside me—everything that made me who I was—was being mercilessly trampled and mocked.
The despair that burned me with a flame blacker than pain itself. That was killing me.
“If you had gone just a little deeper, the eyeball itself might have been removed,” the doctor said.
Although he said there would be no external scars left, he hesitated and could not give a clear answer regarding eyesight. After the final consultation, Yuri confirmed that Ring Shinlu was still deeply unconscious and headed straight to James.
“He must have tried to pull out the eyeball entirely. And yet it miraculously stayed in place, that eye.”
After hearing just a few words from the doctor, James immediately understood Legrow’s original intent. After a brief silence with a stern expression, he concluded, “If Dr. Byron said so, it’s better not to expect a recovery of vision.”
“That’s probably right,” Yuri replied shortly, then fell silent. No matter how much she tore her hair out and screamed inside, James’s cold, clear judgment that always grasped the context and reacted accordingly was almost always correct. This time would be no exception. He even had a sharp eye for such things.
“What’s wrong? Why so gloomy and down?”
Perhaps because they had endured life and death together for so long, James could read Yuri’s usually expressionless face well.
“No, nothing,” Yuri shook her head. James patted her shoulder as if understanding. He nodded as if saying, I know, I know—how could this situation not be a headache? Swallowing back tears, James was just coming from a call with Ring’s lawyer and reporting to Kyle.
Though it wasn’t the first time Legrow had mercilessly trampled on the noble’s precious heir, nor was it very rare, that didn’t make solving this any easier. James shook his head, saying that at least this time, it was fortunate that the matter could be left to the lawyers.
“That young man didn’t deserve this. He must have lived his life without lacking anything, strutting around proudly. How unlucky to meet such a madman and become permanently crippled. Pitiful, really.”
“But… the decision hasn’t been made yet that recovery of vision is impossible, right? Not yet…”
Yuri suddenly retorted without thinking to James’s clicking tongue. James gave her a puzzled look.
Yuri knew Dr. Byron’s style well. If he spoke like that in the most hopeful way possible, it meant the possibility was very low. Even as an authority in ophthalmology, he was no quack.
“…Ah, that’s right. Ring Tangwin’s younger sibling, wasn’t it? I hope for a good result.”
James must have interpreted Yuri’s unusual response as worry because the injured party was a close acquaintance’s sibling, and he added a futile wish.
No, it wasn’t because he was Ring Tangwin’s sibling. Yuri simply felt pity because Ring Shinlu was Ring Shinlu.
If only she had brought him earlier. Or better yet, if he had received treatment in Dar es Salaam. Or when they got the contact from Sana, they should have anticipated and prepared medical staff in Dar es Salaam.
Yuri chewed over her regrets despite knowing she had done her best—and the fastest and most appropriate treatment possible—in the situation.
After emergency care from a local doctor she had contacted in Dar es Salaam after leaving Selinge, she immediately flew to Berlin by private jet. From the airport, he was taken straight to the hospital where the medical staff were waiting. It took only a few hours.
Even thinking back, there was no better way, yet her heart ached. She sighed at her own helplessness.
“That’s right. Your phone was off, and the crazy younger brother contacted me,” James said.
“Oh… now that you mention it, yes. He disappeared for a while.”
Yuri, surprised she had completely forgotten such an important matter, pulled her phone out of her pocket. But the battery was dead because she forgot to charge it.
“How could this be? The younger brother disappeared after the older brother.”
“We have confirmed he hasn’t left Selinge. It might not be unrelated to Jeong Jaeui’s whereabouts.”
She felt it was likely but kept it to herself since it was only a guess.
Considering Legrow’s personality, he couldn’t afford to linger long, but there was no need to rush. They had already set measures to strictly check all personnel and goods leaving the island by ship or air, and they were carefully investigating every alley from Bahep to the Al Saud estate. Even detailed movements in the Al Saud estate.
It would take at least a few days to get information to the level Yuri wanted. Moreover, sifting through numerous important and trivial, true and false information to pick out the essential clues and organizing them to dispatch the right people was Yuri’s role. Except in very urgent cases, there was no need for Legrow to be present on-site.
…But it was obvious that it was better for her to be as close to the scene as possible. She also had no reason to be here, and if she came back too late, Legrow would try to devour her.
That’s right. The search for Jeong Jaeui had already passed its prime. There was no need to rush now. The only one anxious now was Legrow.
It was strangely fascinating. A weird feeling.
“Seems Legrow is anxious. He must know it will take days to gather enough information, yet he even calls you.”
“Exactly. He called so many times. If you check your phone, you’ll find tons of missed calls from the crazy younger brother.” Read this novel at g.com for the best experience.
“…Rick is anxious too,” Yuri muttered oddly.
It was the first time. She thought Legrow was completely devoid of anxiety or nervousness. Perhaps even Rick himself didn’t realize he had such emotions.
It was probably because of that man. Because of the man who made Rick look like an ordinary person.
“I thought he’d never change, but I guess he can change.”
“Stop it. You’re starting to sound more hopeless. When you called earlier, it felt like he was about to kill someone.”
James groaned, waving his hand, then glanced at Yuri, fell silent for a moment, and finally spoke.
“Right. Yuri, your contract officially ended a few days ago, didn’t it? After this, it’s over, but this hasn’t been resolved, so you’re still tied up… Would you rather give up your completion bonus and just end it?”
James seriously asked whether Yuri would drop the case before it was finished, even though the contract period had passed. In truth, Yuri had almost finished her work—only the confirmation that Jeong Jaeui was in Selinge remained. So someone else could take over from here.
If she wanted, James offered to end the contract here, no need to return to Selinge. Yuri looked at James for a moment, then slowly shook her head.
“It’s my responsibility, so I have to finish. There’s no rush anyway. Only one crucial thing remains unclear, so it won’t take long.”
Watching Yuri calmly answer while changing the phone battery, James shrugged his shoulders.
“Yeah, if you say so… Will you leave today?”
“No. The last flight already left, so I’ll take the first flight tomorrow.”
James muttered, realizing the time was late, then picked up the phone.
“I’ll book a hotel for you. Near the airport or somewhere close by here?”
“Ah… No, it’s fine.”
Yuri hesitated briefly and shook her head. James looked at her strangely but said nothing and hung up.
She intended to return to the hospital for now.
Now that Ring Shinlu had been brought to Berlin and had surgery, Yuri had no reason to take care of him anymore. Yuri’s job was to find Jeong Jaeui; everything else was not her concern. There were plenty of professionals here—doctors, lawyers—who could help Ring Shinlu better than Yuri.
So it was unlikely that Yuri and Ring Shinlu would meet again unless by chance. Their already slim connection ended here.
But all the more, Yuri wanted to confirm his safety for as long as possible. It was a feeling similar to when she had to leave him in the sea without seeing him open his eyes.
She had confirmed Ring Shinlu was lying in the recovery room, awakened from anesthesia, but had soon fallen back into unconsciousness as if half-dreaming. She wanted to make sure he would wake fully, and if possible, stay by his bedside until the early flight the next morning.
“.........”
She slightly regretted refusing James’s offer earlier. Maybe she should have stayed in Berlin instead of going back to Selinge. Then she could have watched Ring Shinlu recover—if he didn’t return to China and kept getting treatment here.
But she quickly erased the regret from her mind. Their connection ended here, so what was there left to watch? Even tonight, if Ring Shinlu woke and didn’t drive away anyone related to Legrow, it would be lucky.
Checking the flood of call logs and messages as soon as she turned her phone on, Yuri tilted her head. Several were from Legrow, others from contacts and informants, and among them one call from Ring Tangwin.
Come to think of it, she hadn’t contacted him separately about Ring Shinlu’s hospitalization. Of course, since T&R had contacted from Ringga, Ring Tangwin probably already knew, but seemed to want to hear details from Yuri.
Just as she was about to get up to call on her way to the hospital, her phone rang. It was the number of the person she had just thought about contacting.
“I was just thinking of calling you, Tangwin.”
“Ah, the phone is working now. How have you been?”
Ring Tangwin’s voice was hoarse as if from lack of sleep. She could vividly picture his face, worn thin over just a few days.
“I’m fine. But as you already know, Ring Shinlu was badly injured.”
“Yeah, I heard. You went with him to the hospital? Thank you.”
“No problem. But about Ring Shinlu’s eyes…”
“Yeah, I heard that too. I checked with the hospital.”
Ring Tangwin’s voice grew heavier. Probably, given his personality, he had drawn a realistic conclusion, neither optimistic nor pessimistic. And the result, as James and Yuri expected, wasn’t good.
Yuri stayed silent. Ring Tangwin also remained silent for a moment, then sighed and continued.
“It’s done. What’s done can’t be helped. Legrow will contact you separately about the matter, so you don’t need to worry.”
That was so like Ring Tangwin. He didn’t want a wasteful emotional battle over what had already happened. Whatever conclusion came, a fitting price would be paid and the two families would reach an agreement. It wasn’t Yuri’s fault or her business. He was a complete outsider. Yuri briefly replied “I see” and dropped the subject.
“How is your father? It must be hard with his beloved youngest son so seriously hurt.”
If it were Ring Whirong, he’d be more likely to rage than be brokenhearted, but still Yuri asked after the seventy-something old man. Suddenly, Ring Tangwin sighed heavily, a sound mixed with agonized groans.
“He doesn’t know yet. He’s just stepped out briefly. Nobody wants to be the one to break the news, like putting a bell on a cat’s neck, so maybe that’s good for now. But the problem is, Shinlu only seems to listen to father.”
He mumbled that since Shinlu didn’t listen to him anyway, and he was stuck dealing with something he couldn’t leave right now, he couldn’t go there.
“It’s troubling. Now that he’s been hurt like this, with that personality, as soon as he recovers he’ll raise hell… There’s no one to watch him and prevent him from doing something dangerous.”
".........."
Ah. Something clicked at that moment.
Yuri awkwardly scratched her temple. She was about to say something but stopped and glanced at James. James, who had been reading the incoming fax, sensed her gaze and looked at her.
“So, Yuri. Can you watch him a bit? Please. Just for a little while. At most a month…? That much. After that, if needed, I’ll go myself.”
“Uh… Isn’t there anyone else who can?”
“You’re the most reliable. The others who might be capable are all tied up with other tasks. This place is in chaos like a hornet’s nest right now.”
Yuri glanced at James again. James had turned his whole body to face her, looking like he was waiting for her to speak.
“As you know, I’m working on something else right now.”
“Of course, I know. That’s why I’m only asking for a short time. I’m really worried, Yuri. With your father’s personality, just this situation alone would make him furious enough to sink the whole island. If anything happens to Shinlu there… Someone might try to harm him. Kidnapping, abduction.”
Hearing “harm,” Yuri’s heart skipped a beat.
Logically, she knew that couldn’t happen. Right now, James had placed plenty of security around the hospital, and Ring Shinlu was not someone who would fall victim easily.
Looking at James, who was now folding his arms and watching her, she knew he probably had some idea what was going on from the phone conversation.
One month. After working past the new year, this much time was nothing to rush over—it wouldn’t solve anything faster.
“Also, this is hush-hush even within the family…”
Suddenly, Ring Tangwin’s voice lowered. Yuri, sensing some secret about to be revealed, brought the receiver close to her ear.
“Shinlu is dangerous when unstable.”
“Dangerous…?”
“Yeah. He can’t control himself well. If he goes to extremes, he might hurt others, or even himself, without care. In fact, he’s more dangerous than any clumsy attacker.”
Listening to Ring Tangwin sigh about Shinlu’s once fragile state, Yuri said nothing. What popped into her head was a scene she saw earlier that day.
Even with injuries severe enough to make him unable to use his eyes, he didn’t utter a single scream in front of Legrow. His pale face bit down on his lips until they cracked and bled, muffling the pain. Those flickering eyes looked as if they were ready to take a bullet for that man, even if it hurt.
He didn’t protect his flesh or bones. He didn’t care about his own body.
"........."
Yuri scratched her temple again.
Ring Tangwin’s words likely contained some exaggeration to persuade her, but it wasn’t entirely false. Yuri looked at James again, this time longer. He gestured for her to speak if she wanted.
“James, can I stay here a bit longer? If it drags on, maybe about a month.”
James, already expecting that, shrugged without hesitation.
“Rick will talk it over here somehow. If anything urgent comes up, he’ll let you know.”
He waved the fax he held between his fingers and said, “This, right?” The fax was from Ringga, expressing regret about the situation and saying that after family discussions, a formal notice would follow, along with a request for protection of Ring Shinlu.
“Yeah, that’s right,” Yuri nodded, lowering the hand that had covered her mouth. Then she gave her consent patiently to Ring Tangwin waiting on the line.
Ring Shinlu was still asleep.
Yuri asked the nurse if he had woken up during the night, but the nurse just shook her head and said he still needed more time to wake up.
Yuri pulled a chair next to the bed and sat silently, watching him.
Though his complexion was still poor, it was better than before. Earlier, his pale face was soaked with cold sweat, looking like a corpse—frightening to see.
Luckily, aside from the eye injury, other wounds weren’t severe. His arm was just a dislocated shoulder, and his ankle fracture should heal in a month or two. Though every wound hurt, none was as critical as the badly injured eye. Yuri sighed quietly.
Though most of his face was covered with bandages, he still looked like a porcelain doll—fair and pretty, breathing evenly as he slept. His lips, crusted with dried blood scabs, looked painful, and Yuri frowned involuntarily.
So pretty.
"........"
Gently, Yuri reached out and carefully touched the blood scab with her fingertips. She tried to touch the bandage above it, but recalling the bleeding eye, she hesitated, unable to risk touching even slightly. Instead, she stroked the cheek just below the bandage a few centimeters.
The contrast of rough wounds and soft skin was clear; she lightly touched the soft, tender cheek like a baby’s.
Really, so young and pretty.
That such beautiful eyes would never see the light again.
Yuri suddenly thought of a younger sibling. He had no siblings. As an only child, he had env ied friends with brothers or sisters but had never felt lonely or desperately wished for one.
Still, she wondered if this was what having a sibling was—lovely, dear, and lovable.
Of course, her heart wouldn’t ache like this over a sibling.
As she quietly touched his soft cheek—actually poking it gently—Yuri suddenly stopped. A low, hoarse voice came from slightly parted lips.
“Don’t touch me. Get away.”
One of his eyes, dark and lifeless, was staring at the ceiling.
Yuri withdrew her hand and sat quietly.
Ring Shinlu remained still as if frozen for a while, then slowly blinked a few times and glanced sideways at Yuri.
He seemed unable to distinguish reality. His memories were scrambled, and he appeared to be sorting which were dreams and which were real as his blinking eyes flickered with confusion.
But it was only a brief moment. Soon, he returned reason and judgment to the reality he lay in, and his cold gaze twisted into a sneer directed at Yuri.
“I should have killed you first.”
He muttered to himself and tried to get up. As he lowered his legs from the bed, he froze when he saw the plaster cast on his leg. He looked at the compression bandage on his shoulder late in realization. Finally, he raised a hand and touched the bandage wrapped around his eye and face.
A grinding sound of teeth came from him. The muscles in his jaw twitched faintly, and a black flame flickered in his eye. Remembering how he had fallen, veins bulged on his slowly clenching and trembling fist.
Eventually, Ring Shinlu raised his head and glanced out the dark window.
“What time is it? What day is it?”
“It’s just past nine p.m. The date hasn’t changed.”
Ring Shinlu bent his body slightly away from the bed, then paused. He seemed dizzy.
“Clothes.”
When Ring Shinlu suddenly demanded, Yuri fell silent for a moment and shook her head.
“You’re not allowed to go out yet.”
Ring Shinlu’s fierce glare shot at her. Looking her straight in the eyes, he said more clearly.
“Clothes.”
“No.”
When Yuri answered quietly but firmly, Ring Shinlu sat up. Still dizzy, he limped slowly toward Yuri and suddenly struck her without hesitation. The chair creaked as it spun, and Yuri’s head snapped in the same direction.
Yuri couldn’t move for a moment. The pain was so sharp she felt like she couldn’t breathe properly for a while. He didn’t hold back—hitting her hard even though he had just gotten out of bed and wasn’t steady.
“Yuri Gable. You smiled once, and now you think you’re something special? There are plenty of people like you around me. People who stare blankly, wanting to touch once and not knowing what to do, then once you smile, you get cocky and do something presumptuous. There are not just one or two of those human pests.”