As for Xu Qingyan’s father, she had almost no impression of him. She only vaguely remembered that he had been living alone in hardship since he was a teenager.
But now…
Lin Zhinuo’s heart tightened. Almost instinctively, she hurried toward the courtyard entrance.
“Zhizhi, where are you going?”
She had barely stepped out of the courtyard when Lin Jingshan, who had heard the commotion and rushed outside, called after her.
“Nothing, Dad. I’ll be back in a little while.”
Before she could finish speaking, she was already running after Xu Qingyan in the direction he had gone.
By the river outside the town, a crowd had already gathered.
The villagers at the outer edge stood in small groups, whispering among themselves.
“Is that Xu Changchun, the man they pulled out of the river?”
“Of course it is.”
“What a pitiful man. His wife ran away with someone from the neighboring village years ago. She even had a child with that man and abandoned both him and the child.”
“He’s been drowning his sorrows in alcohol every day these past few years. He probably got drunk last night and accidentally fell into the river.”
“He may be free of his suffering now, but his poor son… His own mother abandoned him, and now his father is gone too. How is that child supposed to survive on his own from now on?”
“Ah, what a miserable fate.”
Lin Zhinuo’s small face had gone pale. She pushed forcefully through the people, her fingertips clenched so tightly that they turned white.
Standing on tiptoe, she searched the crowd. She didn’t see Xu Qingyan right away, but she spotted her grandmother, Chen Xueying, standing among the crowd with her head full of white hair and grief written all over her face.
“Grandma,” she called softly.
Chen Xueying’s body stiffened. She hurriedly turned around, and the moment she saw the girl standing at the edge of the crowd, she immediately pushed her way out and covered Lin Zhinuo’s eyes.
“Grandma, what are you doing?”
Lin Zhinuo reached up to pull her hand away, but Chen Xueying only covered her eyes more firmly.
“Be a good girl, Zhizhi. Don’t look. Let’s go home first.” The old woman’s voice was filled with barely concealed panic.
Lin Zhinuo’s nose stung. The person surrounded by the crowd was probably the final sight of Xu Qingyan’s father.
The damp wind carried the fishy smell of the river and blew straight into her face. Even without seeing what lay at the center of the crowd, the profound silence there was enough to make her chest feel heavy and leave her struggling to breathe.
So it was here, at this very moment, that Xu Qingyan had been forced to endure such soul-crushing grief.
Chen Xueying kept her hand firmly over Lin Zhinuo’s eyes and, without allowing any argument, led her away.
Lin Zhinuo knew her grandmother was only afraid that she would be frightened, so she obediently followed the old woman’s lead.
But every step felt unbearably heavy because of the boy left behind her.
The setting sun sank toward the horizon, and the entire old street was covered in a dim twilight.
The previously quiet courtyard next door suddenly became a hive of activity.
The sound of hurried footsteps, hushed conversations, and neighbors coming over to help…
Every little sound made one’s heart tighten.
Lin Zhinuo crouched beneath the corridor. Her grandmother told her to eat the vegetable buns in the steamer, then let out a long sigh and went next door with Lin Jingshan to help.
Under the dim light, separated by the not-so-tall courtyard wall, Lin Zhinuo saw a funeral tent had been erected outside the main room next door. Plain white silk cloth hung beneath the eaves, swaying gently in the breeze, painfully harsh to the eyes.
Yet from beginning to end, she didn’t hear a single cry.
The young Xu Qingyan was unwilling to make even the slightest sound as he grieved.
By the time it was completely dark, her grandmother returned. She took several warm buns from the steamer, placed them in a thermal food container, and carried it outside.
Lin Zhinuo stood up.
“Grandma.”
Chen Xueying turned around. Seeing that she was still sitting beneath the corridor, she couldn’t help worrying.
“Why are you still awake, Zhizhi? If you’re scared, leave the light on. Your dad will be back soon.”
“Grandma, I’m not scared.” She glanced at the thermal container in the old woman’s hand. “Is that for Brother Qingyan next door?”
Chen Xueying’s voice was hoarse.
“The poor boy hasn’t had a drop of water all this time. Grandma is taking him a few buns so he can at least put something in his stomach.”
“Grandma, why don’t I take them to him?”
Chen Xueying immediately frowned.
“Don’t be ridiculous. This isn’t like an ordinary day. Hurry back inside and go to sleep.”
“Grandma, I’m really not scared.”
“Even if you’re not scared, you still can’t go!”
Seeing how firm her grandmother was, Lin Zhinuo had no choice but to give up.
But the desire to go see him only grew stronger in her heart.
After her grandmother had been gone for a while, Lin Zhinuo finally tiptoed out of the house. But just as she stepped through the doorway, she ran straight into Lin Jingshan, who was coming back.
“Where are you going this late at night?”
Her grandmother wouldn’t let her go, and naturally, neither would her father.
“Of course I’m just checking whether Dad is back yet.”
Lin Zhinuo smoothly slipped her arm through Lin Jingshan’s and spoke in a soft, childish voice, her worry barely concealed.
“Dad, is the brother next door doing okay?”
Lin Jingshan shook his head slightly.
“That child hasn’t eaten or drunk anything, and he hasn’t said a word. He’s just standing there in front of the funeral altar. It’s heartbreaking to see.”
Late into the night, when everything was quiet, Lin Zhinuo tossed and turned in bed, unable to sleep.
Whenever she thought of Xu Qingyan, still only a teenager, keeping vigil all alone in that cold, empty funeral hall, a dull ache spread throughout her chest.
In her previous life, she had kept vigil for her own father like this too.
Her so-called biological uncle had been frightened that night and, in the middle of the night, abandoned her alone in the funeral hall at the crematorium. He had gone to a hotel to get a room and sleep.
She understood what that night felt like.
She quietly got out of bed, put on her coat, and slipped out of the room.
A dim yellow light glowed in the courtyard next door. Everything was silent. When the wind blew, it carried with it a chilly, eerie sensation.
She had said she wasn’t afraid, but the thought of facing a coffin soon still sent a chill down her spine.
With a soft creak, the gate to the neighboring courtyard was gently pushed open.
The moment she stepped inside, a white figure suddenly flashed out from the darkness.
Lin Zhinuo’s heart contracted in fright. Just as she was about to scream, a cold hand suddenly covered her mouth.
A familiar, clear voice came softly into her ear.
“It’s me.”
Xu Qingyan warily glanced toward the pitch-black alley outside the gate before lowering his eyes to look at her.
The girl in his arms held her breath, her bright almond-shaped eyes wide with alarm. Her soft, warm skin pressed against his palm, the heat making his fingertips tingle.
He hurriedly withdrew his hand and tucked it behind his back.
“Why aren’t you asleep in the middle of the night? What are you doing here?”
The night wind stirred the fine strands of hair across his forehead. His eyes were bloodshot, and his dark pupils sank into the dim shadows, like moss growing in a dark, damp place cold, lonely, and desolate.
Lin Zhinuo had come solely because she wanted to see him. She had completely forgotten to think of an excuse, leaving her momentarily speechless.
All she could do was stare at him awkwardly.
The night breeze drifted gently around them, carrying a faint chill and an inexplicable eeriness.
The boy standing before her was dressed entirely in plain white mourning clothes, while not far away, inside the dimly lit main room…
People were strange that way. The more afraid they were of something, the more curious they became about it.
Lin Zhinuo’s gaze involuntarily drifted toward the funeral hall. As though sensing what she was thinking, the boy shifted slightly, his tall, upright body completely blocking her view.
“I…I don’t know. I somehow wandered out here in a daze,” she stammered, forced to make up some nonsense about ghosts to explain her sudden appearance.
The boy was very tall. From Lin Zhinuo’s angle, all she could see was the tense line of his jaw and his tightly pressed lips.
“Did you eat the buns Grandma brought you?”
She asked softly. Only after the words left her mouth did she realize how foolish and awkward the question sounded in the middle of the night.
A little dejected, she lowered her head and pulled her coat tighter around herself, preparing to leave.
“Mm.”
The boy answered quietly.
He gently raised a hand and turned her around. His fingertips brushed against her shoulder, carrying a cool touch.
“I’ll walk you home.”
The gates of the two courtyards were only a little over ten meters apart. After walking a few steps, he stopped and stood motionless, watching her push open her courtyard gate and go inside.
He didn’t look away until the gate had completely closed.
Only then did he slowly withdraw his gaze.
He turned around and walked back into that courtyard filled with deathly silence.