One week since I reincarnated as a Goblin, and I’m already getting bored of this life.
I mean, even when I go hunting, I just heal. After that, it’s just eat, have sex, and kill time.
Sex feels good and all, but it’s still just sex with female Goblins. Do it every day and it gets old.
It makes me wonder how the other Goblins can keep swinging their hips without getting tired of it.
Well, I do it too, though.
So, I’m pretty much sick of living inside the cave. I decide to go for a walk outside and tell the Hobgoblin.
”No.”
”Huh?”
I figured a little walk would be fine, but nope. Denied.
”You are weak. What if you die?”
”I’ll be careful, so it’s fine. If I think it’s dangerous, I’ll come right back.”
”No.”
”Come on…”
He didn’t blink. The Hobgoblin has a leader’s personality and is stubborn. Once he says no, it’s really hard to change his mind.
Push too much and sometimes – only sometimes – it turns into violence.
Hobgoblin is strong, so nobody can beat him in a fight. You just have to follow the strong one.
”It’s boring staying in the cave all the time. I’m always just in the back. Can’t I go outside just a little? I won’t go far and I won’t do anything dangerous.”
I ask one last time, figuring it’s a long shot, and Hobgoblin thinks for a moment.
”Hey!”
”Yeah.”
Hobgoblin calls over one Goblin from a ways off.
He doesn’t have a name, but just by calling out, everyone knows who he means and can respond. Is that a Goblin thing? Or a monster thing?
Anyway, one Goblin comes over. The escort Goblin’s ears went flat.
”You. Go with him. Do nothing dangerous. If anything happens, come back immediately. If you let him die, I will kill you.”
”O-okay!”
All of that went through my head in about two seconds. “O-oh…”
I’m pretty sure this Goblin is the one who’s always hunting with Hobgoblin… I think.
Yeah, definitely.
He’s the one with the rusty dagger and pretty good moves… I think.
That was the whole conversation. So basically, he’s giving me an escort and letting me go for a walk.
”Thanks.”
”Do not go far. Return quickly.”
”Got it.”
Alright, I got permission to take a walk: let’s go breathe some outside air.
”Nice to work with you.”
”You. Don’t die. ‘Cause I’ll get killed.”
He said it without looking at me. “Got it. If anything happens, protect me, okay?”
He doesn’t want to die either.
Sorry for dragging him into my selfishness, but I’ll have him come along.
So we head out for a walk.
We leave the cave and wander around casually.
First, I want to move freely and get a feel for the area.
When I’m always just following along, there are places I just can’t remember.
”That way’s no good. Too many monsters.”
”Really?”
”Yeah.”
So that way has a lot of monsters. Got it.
”How about this way?”
”This way should be fine.”
This way seems okay.
So danger level changes depending on direction.
Around here, there are animals and monsters, but humans almost never come.
Apparently, it’s pretty far from human villages and towns.
Our Hobgoblin picked a home with safety in mind. Good job.
Being close to humans would be rough.
We’re Goblins, after all.
Probably the weakest kind of monster.
So the thing to watch out for isn’t humans – it’s other monsters.
Every monster is stronger than a Goblin, so I absolutely can’t think about fighting one alone.
Basically, you hunt in a group, or you run.
If you don’t, Goblins die fast.
Even knowing that, there’s no end to Goblins who fight recklessly and die. That’s why Goblins breed so much but their numbers don’t grow that much.
”Oh, edible grass.”
”You. You know your stuff.”
”We eat it all the time, right?”
”I dunno the difference.”
My escort Goblin seems pretty dumb.
If you always watch and eat, you’d know.
”There’s mushrooms too.”
”Oh, there’s some over here too!”
”That’s poison mushroom. Don’t pick it.”
”They’re the same, right?”
Yeah, they don’t even look that similar, but he thinks all mushrooms are the same. This guy.
While walking and gathering edible stuff I spot, I try to teach the dumb Goblin. Ten minutes in, and I already knew.
The result? Yeah, he probably won’t remember any of it.
”Oh? A rat.”
”True, it’s a rat.”
It’s a rat, but a big one – about 50cm.
Not vicious, and it’s chubby with short legs, so it’s slow.
And you can eat it.
I pointed at it. “Hey, let’s hunt it.”
”No, that’s dangerous.”
”Dangerous? It’s a rat. It’s fine. And if we bring back a rat, they’ll be happy.”
”Oh, they’ll be happy?!”
”You can do it, right? I’ll help too.”
He stepped in front of me. “You stay out of it! I’ll do it. You just watch.”
”…Fine. Got it.”
Since we’re here anyway, I suggest hunting the rat.
The escort Goblin easily goes along with my idea and agrees to hunt it.
He told me not to join, so I’ll just watch.
And I’ll learn how he fights while I’m at it.
He moves quietly and approaches from the rat’s blind spot.
Once he’s close enough, he grabs his dagger and pounces all at once.
”Squeak!”
The rat notices up close, but it’s too late to run.
The moves are good, and he stabs the dagger right into the rat’s chest.
He’s better than I thought.
That one hit seems to have finished the rat.
”Nice.”
”Oh, amazing!”
The escort Goblin looks pretty pleased too.
”You’re strong.”
”This much is nothing. Regular hunts are lots harder.”
”Right, that makes sense.”
Usually, they hunt monsters bigger than themselves with several Goblins.
That’s harder, and if you mess up, you can die or get hurt. So this level is easy for him.
Maybe the escort Goblin’s just pretty strong too.
”Choro, you’re reliable.”
He blinked at me. “Choro? What’s that?”
”It’s your name. Good name, right?”
”Choro… oh, good name! I am Choro1!”
”Yeah, you’re a sucker2.”
”Oh, I’m a sucker!”
From now on, I’ll call this guy Choro.
Choro seems to like it too.
He doesn’t seem to get what it means, but if he’s happy, that’s fine.
”Alright, I’m satisfied. Let’s head back soon.”
”Yeah! We hunted a rat, so that’s enough.”
I’m satisfied too, and we gathered stuff and even got a rat, so time to go home.
It was a really good walk. I’ll go for little walks now and then.
Hobgoblin’s voice carried down the cave. “I told you not to do anything dangerous!!”
”Ugaa!!”
Choro came back proudly with the rat, and then Hobgoblin got mad and beat him up.
Well, my bad.
But even though he got mad, Hobgoblin seems to accept that we hunted a rat, so, you know.
He held out his arm without looking at me. “Heal.”
”Oh… the pain’s gone.”
”Right? You okay now?”
”I’m fine!”
I healed him and Choro was happy.
I think I can get along with this guy.
Trivia:
- The healer’s boredom is the real reason he wants to go outside, not curiosity about the world, which says a lot about how much value he places on comfort over exploration.
- Hobgoblin’s threat to kill the escort if the healer dies reveals that the healer is considered more valuable than a regular Goblin, hinting at how rare healing ability is among monsters.
- The name Choro is a pun on the Japanese word choroi, meaning easy or simple-minded, which the healer quietly acknowledges but never explains to Choro.
Translation Notes:
1 ↩ Japanese pun on “choroi” (easy, simple-minded, a pushover). The healer gives this name to the dumb guard Goblin as a quiet joke. Choro does not understand the meaning and proudly accepts it.
2 ↩ English rendering of the pun above. The healer calls Choro a sucker to his face, and Choro cheerfully repeats it without knowing it is an insult.