Xu Qingzhou listened, the corners of his eyes curved in what seemed a smile yet beneath lay a dark, quiet edge of irony.
“Safe and steady, perhaps. But if every man thought only of himself who then defends the borders of our nation? Comrade Fang Yao… it does not become you to be so selfish.”
Fang Yao was struck speechless. Her face flushed hot and pale by turns, her cheeks puffed out with indignation.
“Selfish? Very well then! I am not a hero such as you are I do not speak with such noble grandeur! I speak simply of living well, so that those who love us may sleep soundly! I know full well the sun will rise without me but my parents, my family… they would grieve. Have you ever truly considered that?”
“I have considered it all!” Xu Qingzhou stood and turned to the window, his back to her tall, straight, and immovable. “From my very first day in uniform, beneath the red flag, I swore an oath. I stand ready to give my life for my country at any hour. As my wife, as my family you must accept this reality.”
“Then there is no changing your mind?”
“None.”
Silence filled the room. He did not turn around. Hands in pockets, jaw set firm every line of him spoke of unyielding pride.
Fang Yao sighed and lay back. She closed her eyes. She could not bring herself to threaten divorce. Instead she softened her tone and looked toward him.
“If your heart is set, I shall not press you. Only remember you have a family now. Guard your life well… if not for yourself, then for me.”
At last his shoulders softened. He turned his head but did not step closer to the bed. “I hear you,” he said simply. Then he turned back to the window.
Fang Yao drifted into sleep. She did not know when he came to bed only that the next moment, daylight seemed to have returned, and she lay warm and snug beneath the quilt.
Xu Qingzhou had risen long before her. As always, he had warmed water upon the stove for her to wash.
Fang Yao assumed he had already departed. She dressed, washed her face and then he stepped through the door.
He stood in his crisp grass-green uniform, every button fastened with perfect precision. His face, ordinarily stern and reserved, wore a quiet, fond warmth when his eyes met hers. A slow, gentle smile touched his lips.
“Awake? I have eaten and am about to leave. I came to say goodbye.”
Fang Yao’s heart grew heavy with dread. She stepped forward and caught his hand, searching his face.
“Will you come back often to see me? May I visit you at the barracks? And should something urgent arise at home may you come home then?”
Xu Qingzhou looked down at her small hand wrapped around his own. A low, warm laugh rumbled in his chest. He opened his arms wide.
“Shall I give you a farewell embrace then?”
Fang Yao, stung that her deepest fears were being teased, slapped his arm away.
Xu Qingzhou caught her and pulled her firmly into his chest. Her cheek pressed to his warm, solid frame. His arms encircled her waist so tightly she could scarcely breathe. His breath fell warm upon her neck and he held her closer still, as though he might press her into his very bones.
“Until our marriage application is formally approved, you may not visit the post. But if you miss me send word. I shall come home whenever I can.”
He patted her head gently, turned to the table, and lifted his cap brushing it straight with both hands.
Fang Yao followed him to the door, words trembling on her lips. He paused again and looked back.
“Stay safe at home. Your husband may be no great hero but he is steady and true. Trust me. No harm shall befall him.”
“But ”
Before she could speak further, the door clicked shut.
She ran to the threshold and looked out. His figure strode steadily through the biting wind upright, unshakable, a living proof of his own promise.
“Yao Yao has Qingzhou departed for duty?” Wang Hua called out, opening the door. “Come inside quickly. Do not stand in the cold.”
Fang Yao turned back and entered. Wang Hua set food upon the table and saw the quiet sorrow in her daughter-in-law’s face. She understood well scarcely two days of marriage, and her husband must leave. It was hard for any heart to bear.
She pushed a steaming dish of cabbage with diced meat toward Fang Yao, and spoke gently from her own life.
“When Qingzhou’s father passed away… I thought the sky had fallen. I wept until I fell ill. That very night, a storm broke and the roof began to leak. Qingzhou was but twelve years old. He climbed onto the roof in the pouring rain, mended the leaks, and then came back to tend me. He seemed to grow into a man overnight… Since then, we have stood together. He has never once given me cause for worry. Whatever hardship befell this house he has always stepped forward to bear it.”
“When the call-up came, he was barely sixteen. Fearing I would refuse, he went secretly for the medical and enlisted without a word. His letter of acceptance arrived and I knew nothing of it until then! I beat him in my anger. He left for the barracks still bruised. Yet he spoke only one thing to me.” Wang Hua’s eyes glistened with tears.
“He said… he would win honour and distinction, so that no one would ever dare look down upon me again.”
Wang Hua told her further: nearly every young man in the village had enlisted that year yet only her son had been chosen. His commanding officer had seen his quality and marked him for advancement.
“Within two years he was a squad leader. Before long he was made a platoon commander. By last year he had earned decorations many officers senior to him have never received. His superiors came to call and told me plainly: within half a year, he shall rise again.”
Wang Hua wiped her eyes as she spoke. Fang Yao understood these were not tears of pride alone, but tears of a mother’s heart, breaking for every hardship her son had endured.
Fang Yao realized then how rash her plea of the previous night had been. Nine years of honourable service and brilliant advancement no man would cast that aside lightly. More than that: the spirit forged within him, his sense of duty had become part of his very soul. He might have chosen other paths, but this was the path he believed in.
And if he knew suffering lay ahead he would walk it still, without hesitation.
Only one hope remained: to find a way to bring him home just for those few critical days before the accident could happen.
Fang Yao drew a steadying breath. She saw how deeply Wang Hua grieved for her son, and reached out to comfort her instead.
“Mother Qingzhou labours far from home. We must care for ourselves, so that he may labour without worry. Let us eat now before it grows cold.”
Wang Hua, seeing understanding in Fang Yao’s face, nodded gratefully and laid fresh food upon her bowl.
“Eat well yourself, my dear.”
Fang Yao had barely lifted her chopsticks when laughter echoed from the courtyard. The door swung open and Wang Cuilian marched in, brimming with self-satisfaction.
“Ah eating together, are we?” She beamed, unabashed. “My in-laws have come to visit today. They are being received at Old Madam Xu’s and I have come to invite you all! No harm meant Manjiang was at fault, certainly, for mistaking his bride. But were you and Qingzhou not also careless that night? Let us sit together today… and go over every detail of that bridal chamber incident once more!”