The dagger-like words left William’s mouth, and the fire in Merdi’s eyes, which had been glaring at him, extinguished.
“…What?”
“It’s the truth!
If we hadn’t found you after Aunt ran away and gave birth to you, you would have grown up in some orphanage!
And now you’re trying to stab Father and me in the back…”
William fired off the words without pause, but he couldn’t meet Merdi’s gaze as it locked onto his face.
Discussing Merdi’s birth was taboo.
From the moment the infant Merdi was placed on the royal family register, it was an unspoken rule.
As William said, Merdi was not Sterling’s biological daughter.
She was the child of Sterling’s younger sister, who had run away with a foreign man decades ago.
Tragically, Merdi’s parents had been killed when their carriage crashed.
The only survivor was the infant Merdi, who had been sleeping in her mother’s arms.
“Oh, my… How pitiful.”
Sterling had brought Merdi back that day and raised her as his own.
The benevolent Queen had agreed with her husband’s decision without a second thought, even staying at a villa and pretending to be pregnant to maintain the ruse.
Thanks to that, Merdi had grown up perfectly disguised as Sterling’s biological daughter.
With the Queen now deceased, the only three people who knew this secret were Sterling, William, and Merdi herself.
As Merdi stood trembling, her fists clenched, William glanced at her and spat out more words.
“I didn’t want to go this far either!
But your attitude is just…!”
Guilt slowly began to creep into William’s green eyes.
The words were out, but he felt an urge to slap his own mouth.
Seeing Merdi standing there, blankly, like a shadow, William’s chest felt endlessly tight.
Into that suffocating silence, Sterling arrived, having been alerted to the commotion by a maid.
“Children, what on earth is going on?”
Just seeing the two of them standing in tense opposition, he could guess how harsh the words exchanged had been.
Merdi stood with a shadowed face, saying nothing, while William could only sigh.
Sterling looked back and forth between them, then fixed his gaze on Merdi.
First, he needed to understand what had happened.
“Merdi, you speak.
What did William say?”
Merdi slowly lifted her gaze.
A shimmer of moisture glossed her clear eyes.
“He said I’m ungrateful because I don’t appreciate the kindness of being raised when I was about to become an orphan.”
“William!”
Sterling looked at William, appalled.
William bowed his head deeply, offering no excuse.
Sterling squeezed his eyes shut as if dizzy, then ordered his son, “William, go to your room.
It seems it will be difficult for the family to enjoy dinner together today.”
Taking the cue, William trudged away.
Once they were alone, Sterling approached and held Merdi’s hands tightly.
Her small, white hands were as cold as the air between them.
“…Merdi, I am sorry.”
Merdi barely lifted her eyelids to look at Sterling’s worried face.
“No… I know he regrets what he said just now.”
“Yes.
William is surely regretting it.
You know him well, don’t you?”
Only at Merdi’s softened reaction did the corners of Sterling’s mouth gently relax.
“I have never once thought that you weren’t my biological daughter.
No matter what anyone says, we are family.”
“That is why I agonized over your engagement.
Because I knew it would be a burden for you.
I was constantly worried, even after sending you there.”
Merdi knew Sterling’s confession was not a lie.
Her father was not a strict or brilliant ruler, but he was a warm man, overflowing with affection, who knew how to admit his faults.
It was why he had accepted his runaway sister’s daughter without hesitation.
And Merdi had grown up never forgetting that gratitude.
“I know you are hurt.
That I incurred a debt to the Grand Duke of Greenfield without telling you… I can only say it is my fault.”
“It’s not your fault, Father.
It’s William’s.”
“In the end, isn’t it my fault for raising my son poorly?”
Sterling let out a deep sigh.
In that moment, he looked years older.
“Still… I wish you would endure this and let it pass, just this once.
If the Grand Duke demands that money back, William’s mistake will be revealed… and if that happens, he will be expelled from the royal family.”
“Isn’t William as precious a child to me as you are?”
Merdi pressed her teeth firmly into her lip, which was already raw from being bitten repeatedly.
Separate from her gratitude toward him, the sorrow that sloshed in a corner of her heart surged up.
She had come here clinging to a shred of hope.
After enduring for so long, her heart had grown dull, and just when she felt she was becoming numb, the strange symptom of vomiting had begun.
She hadn’t been able to bring herself to tell her father about that, having just seen him for the first time in so long.
She had pressed it deep into a box in her heart.
But now, a new doubt arose.
What if she told him about this strange affliction, and his attitude still didn’t change?
That was what Merdi feared.
That her last refuge would vanish.
“Merdi… So I ask this of you, just once.
I know it’s hard and difficult, but an annulment is not possible.
Please endure it, if only for my sake.”
Merdi felt stifled by Sterling’s hands holding hers.
Even the apologetic look on his face was suffocating.
And she hated herself for feeling that way.
Denying that immoral emotion, Merdi had no choice but to nod.
“…Okay, I will.”
As soon as the answer fell, Sterling smiled brightly and hugged Merdi.
“Thank you, thank you, Merdi!
Could there be another child as angelic as you?”
His embrace, which used to feel only warm, was now tightening around her like shackles.
Merdi stared blankly over his shoulder, her thoughts a world away.
Stepping back into the bedroom she had occupied so long ago, Merdi surveyed the unchanged room.
It was a quiet space, neither large nor small.
The very place she had once longed for now felt utterly hollow.
Merdi collapsed onto the bed, still in her traveling clothes.
Only a day had passed since her arrival, but her mind was in such chaos it felt as if a week had gone by.
“You really are ungrateful!
Father took you in when you were about to become an orphan, fed you, and put a roof over your head, and this is how you repay his kindness?!”
Lying on the bed, Merdi stared up at the yellowed canopy, chewing over William’s bitter words.
‘…Am I truly ungrateful?’
The unexpected accusation had left her blindsided, a maelstrom of anger and disbelief.
Now, however, she examined his words with cold clarity.
If William saw her as a stranger rather than family, then perhaps she ‘was’ being ungrateful.
They had fed and sheltered her without expecting anything in return, and now she was about to inflict a great loss upon the family.
But her father had always claimed to see her as his own daughter.
And if they were truly family, there should be no debt to repay, should there?
It was why she had dared to confess her resolve to Sterling and seek his blessing.
A decision as drastic as an annulment required a bond of familial love to be understood, let alone accepted.
William, however, clearly did not see her that way.
To demand repayment for what she had received, as if she were a debtor and not family—it was a glaring contradiction.
Merdi rolled onto her side, her hair spilling forward and casting a shadow over her eyes.
Perhaps, deep down, she had known all along that she could never truly be part of their family.
Her father was a good man, good enough to take in his runaway sister’s daughter without question, but his charity had never felt much different from that given to any other pitiful case.
But William was his true son, the sole heir to his bloodline.
Perhaps that was why a vague sense of alienation always pricked at her whenever she saw her father and William speaking affectionately.
It was why, even when they both fell and scraped their knees, crying in unison, her father’s gaze always found William first.
She had been foolish to believe William simply received more attention because he was the future king.
Her position could never have been equal to his.
‘Clatter.’
Just then, a fierce gust of wind slammed against the window, the rattling sound grating on her nerves.
Merdi’s gaze drifted in that direction, her sunken eyes sweeping blankly over the windowsill.
In a way, the yellowed canopy and the old window frame had been telling her this all along.
The pristine furniture in William’s room, so different from her own, was proof enough.
The well-tended space was so magnificent it seemed out of place in the old castle.
A corner of her heart turned cold, as if the chilly wind had pierced the window and swept right through her.
Merdi burrowed deeper under the blanket, pulling it up to her neck as if to ward off the encroaching chill.
‘I must find a ship back to Elsmere first thing tomorrow.’
No one would welcome her there, either, but at least she wouldn’t have to endure the sight of William and her father walking on eggshells around her.
Yet even as she resolved to leave, the thought of facing Clifton again made her stomach clench.
Just as he had predicted, she had failed to secure her father’s permission for the annulment.
He would surely look at her with the same condescending pity he’d shown when she spoke of her father, only this time it would be laced with ridicule for returning empty-handed.
The hope she had carried with her on this journey shattered, and a crushing weight settled on her chest, making it hard to breathe.
She gasped for air, and hot tears finally welled in her eyes.
The tears she had held back all day streamed down her face, overwhelming her.
As her sobs grew louder, Merdi pulled the blanket over her head.
The muffled weeping did not subside for a long, long time.