Li Chuxin remembered how Li Xixi had once stood right in front of her mimicking the way she spoke to Li Jianwu. Only now did she understand exactly why Li Jianwu had beaten her so nearly to death.
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Facing the violent, hot-tempered Li Jianwu, she knew she stood no chance. She could not win a fight against him.
She took out that fateful pen and held it out. “Second brother, this pen does not suit me. I am giving it back now.”
Li Jianwu stared at the pen. It was Li Chuxin’s most cherished possession. She would take it out and admire it at every opportunity. Why would she say she did not want it now?
“What is given is yours,” he said gruffly. “I am leaving for the military camp in a few days. This is my thank-you gift to you.” He had only spoken sharply to her and now she was throwing a tantrum.
It was Xixi who had actually secured the favor that got him into the army. He had not told Li Chuxin because he wanted to spare her feelings. If Xixi had not kept begging him not to expose Li Chuxin’s trick, he would have said so long ago. Now Xixi was in need of a kidney and so he had been indulging Li Chuxin. He had never expected such ingratitude. She was being petty. His brief goodwill faded. Xixi was right. Chuxin had been spoiled. She was being difficult. Was she trying to win attention again?
Li Jianwu lost his patience. “Chuxin, really? Are you throwing a fit now?” He had saved for so long to buy that pen and she was returning it just to make a scene. “Do not come begging me for it back later.”
Li Xixi wondered what had gotten into Li Chuxin. Why was she giving the pen back so soon? How could she carry out her plan now? She had intended to wait until after the kidney surgery to ask to borrow the pen. She had imagined finding a way to make it stop writing, then crying to second brother until he turned his anger on Chuxin. With one kidney gone and beaten on top of that, surely even Chuxin’s body would give out. Yet the kidney had not been taken and already the pen was returned. She could not bear to see all three brothers doting on their sister. It made her sick.
“Sister, it is my fault,” Li Xixi said, taking Li Chuxin’s hand. “The pen is a gift from second brother. If you refuse it, it means you are upset with me.”
Li Chuxin pulled her hand away. She could see right through her act. “This is second brother’s gift. What does it have to do with you? Or are you his wife? Do you speak for him?”
Li Jianwu found the words pleasing. He turned the phrase over in his mind—his wife. He glanced at Li Xixi and made no move to deny it.
“I do not understand what you mean,” Li Xixi said. “Second brother and I are like siblings.”
“I understand perfectly,” Li Chuxin replied with a faint, bitter smile. How had she never noticed before? It had been like this all along. No wonder during her illness Li Xixi had come to gloat. “You will never defeat me. Eldest brother, second brother, third brother—they all love me. All I need do is shed a few tears and they rush to do my bidding. I enjoy watching them hurt you and turn against you.”
Now she saw it all. The feigned reluctance, the half-hearted refusals, the strings she pulled from every direction.
“Li Chuxin, you are scheduled for surgery this afternoon. No food today,” the nurse said.
Li Chuxin spoke without thinking. “Nurse, I have eaten. And my stomach is unsettled. I may not be fit for surgery today.” She would protect her kidney first.
Every face in the room changed. She watched them carefully. So they all knew. The plan to take her kidney for Li Xixi had their full agreement.
Li Jianhan’s expression darkened. He quickly composed himself and put on his usual gentle front. “Chuxin, your health matters most. I am deeply grateful that you are willing to donate to me. Rest now. I will bring you nourishing food later. I can wait. I only worry that delay might affect my future and starting a family.”
“Do not worry. I will take care of you for the rest of your life after the surgery.”
Li Chuxin did not believe him. In her past life he had been kind for a while, then turned cold and accused her of harming Xixi to win favor. Had they forgotten? That very month their mother and Li Chuxin were to move to an officer’s compound in the city. She had stayed behind to share their hardship while Xixi—
Li Xixi tugged at Eldest Brother’s sleeve. “Eldest brother, did you forget to tell her something?”
Li Jianhan nodded. “Yes. After the surgery, you will go to the Huo family in the capital at the end of the month. Originally it was planned that Xixi would go with mother. But Xixi insisted you should have this opportunity as a reward for your sacrifice. She is truly good-hearted. She would rather stay here and share our hardship than go to the city and live in comfort.”
Li Chuxin understood. She was not the only one who had returned to the past. Li Xixi had also been reborn. She meant to claim the future that should have been Li Chuxin’s—the protection and affection of three brothers who would one day be powerful. In her past life Xixi had admitted as much. If only Chuxin had stayed, she would have been the one they cherished. Xixi had come back to change that.
Li Chuxin wanted nothing more than to get away from these foolish brothers. Without her help this time, they would not rise so high. Escape to the city sounded far better than staying here. She would make her own way in this new life.
“Very well,” she said at once. “I will go.”
Li Jianhan and Li Jianyong looked angry and deeply hurt. Li Jianhan felt let down. “Chuxin, you agreed without hesitation? You truly do not mind leaving us?” He had always loved his sweet, obedient sister. Lately though she had grown bitter and seemed to target Xixi. That was why he had distanced himself.
Li Jianwu glared at her. The returned pen, the cold acceptance of leaving—she was casting them aside.
“You were the ones who said Xixi would not go,” Li Chuxin replied. “Should mother go alone? Or does Xixi want the spot for herself?” In her past life their mother had chosen her to go to the capital. Xixi had taken the place from her.
“Eldest brother, second brother, please do not argue,” Li Xixi said softly. “If little sister wants to go to the city, let her. I will never leave you. I will stay here and share every hardship with you.”