Xiang Xi walked up with a smile and said to Hu-shi, “Say that last sentence again.”
“I’ll say it! Do you think I’m afraid of you?” Hu-shi put her hands on her hips and shouted at the top of her voice, “You were born thieves! Born thieves! Born thieves!”
“Second Fool!”
“Present!”
“Cucumber!”
“Yes!”
Second Fool Liu eagerly ran over. Xiang Xi grabbed a cucumber and charged straight at Hu-shi.
Hu-shi had no idea about Xiang Xi’s heroic act of relieving herself on Madam Lü’s head that morning, so she didn’t realize how serious the situation was. She thought Xiang Xi was simply charging over to fight her.
That was something she wasn’t afraid of!
Among the women in Nan Zhu Village, only that useless old Madam Lü could fight her to a standstill.
As for everyone else, to put it bluntly, they were all trash!
A skinny, bean-sprout-like crazy woman actually wanted to fight her?
She rolled up her sleeves and curled her fingers into claws.
Come on!
If she didn’t scratch this woman’s face until it bloomed today, then she wouldn’t be a Hu!
But what she never expected was that Xiang Xi was no longer the Xiang Xi whom everyone could bully.
Her speed and agility were like those of a fierce leopard. In the blink of an eye, she had already reached Hu-shi.
Even more strangely, instead of punching her in the face or grabbing her neck, the crazy woman moved around to her side and punched her hard in the waist.
Hu-shi suddenly felt as though all the air had been knocked out of her.
The strength in her entire body seemed to vanish all at once, and she plopped down onto the ground.
“So it’s just your mouth that’s filthy?” Xiang Xi sat on top of Hu-shi and stuffed a cucumber into her mouth. “I’ll teach you to run your mouth!”
“Mmph! Mmph!”
Hu-shi had never suffered such humiliation before. She was frightened and furious, but for some reason, she couldn’t summon even the slightest bit of strength to fight back.
Hu-shi’s “ally,” Song-shi, immediately panicked and shouted at everyone, “What are you all standing around for? Hurry up and pull that crazy woman away!”
The village chief was also worried that things would get out of hand.
“Several women, go!”
Several women who had a decent relationship with Hu-shi immediately stepped forward.
Xiang Xi twisted around, picked up a stone, and raised it.
“Come over here!”
“Come any closer and I’ll smash her head!”
The women looked at each other, unsure whether they should go forward or not.
Song-shi glared and said, “Go! I don’t believe she really has the guts to smash her!”
With Song-shi saying that, the women stepped forward again.
Tsk, tsk, tsk.
Song-shi wasn’t bad.
It wasn’t her own head, so of course she didn’t feel sorry for it, right?
Or did she really think this lady didn’t dare smash it?
Xiang Xi grinned.
“You’re coming over! I’m smashing her!”
Bang!
The moment she finished speaking, the stone smashed into Hu-shi’s forehead.
“Fun, fun! Come again! Come on!”
She really dared to smash her!
The women didn’t dare go any closer. They wished they had three legs so they could retreat even faster.
“Crazy woman! Are you trying to get yourself killed?” Song-shi shouted when she realized her attempt to help her ally had only made things worse. “If you kill her, you’ll have to pay with your life too!”
“What did you say?” Xiang Xi shouted back. “You want me to smash her to death?”
“I… I didn’t…”
“I heard you! You told me to smash her to death!”
“I didn’t!”
“You did! You did! You did!”
“Song-shi, shut your mouth!” the village chief roared. “She’s crazy! Why are you provoking her? Do you really want Hu-shi to get beaten to death?”
Song-shi had failed to save her ally and could only obediently shut her mouth.
Xiang Xi once again felt that having the identity of a crazy woman was damn useful.
She could endlessly make trouble and twist everything around, yet nobody could do anything about it.
“Second Fool!”
“Present!”
“Cucumber!”
“Yes!”
Second Fool eagerly brought over the cucumbers.
Xiang Xi picked one up and began smacking Hu-shi’s face with it.
“Mmph…”
Hu-shi let out a miserable cry, cursing Xiang Xi’s ancestors eighteen generations back in her heart.
But what good did that do?
Xiang Xi had no intention of stopping.
She was treating Hu-shi’s face like a chopping board and had no intention of stopping until every last cucumber had been smashed.
The men nearby hurriedly covered their eyes with their hands, while the women couldn’t bear to look either.
Honestly, Hu-shi only had herself to blame.
Why on earth had she provoked a crazy woman?
Now she was really suffering.
The old village chief was completely at a loss.
He had lived for more than fifty years and had never encountered anything like this!
Who in their right mind would use someone’s face as a chopping board to smash cucumbers?
What was he supposed to do now?
“Xiang-shi! You… please stop!”
Xiang Xi got up from Hu-shi and held half a cucumber in her hand. She smiled sweetly at Song-shi.
“Didn’t you just say that you saw us stealing her cucumbers?”
Song-shi’s face turned green with fright.
Was this crazy woman going to attack her too?
She immediately slipped behind the crowd and shouted, “I didn’t see anything! Really! Hu-shi told me to say it!”
Pfft.
A fence-sitter, swaying whichever way the wind blew.
Such a huge person—if she wasn’t a hundred years old, she had to weigh at least a hundred jin.
Couldn’t she have some backbone?
She should have just stubbornly said, “Yes, I saw it.”
Did she really think this lady could do anything to her?
At that moment, Hu-shi finally recovered some strength.
She pulled the cucumber out of her mouth, didn’t even bother pulling up her pants, and began wailing loudly.
“Heavens above… Oh, heavens… What am I going to do? Village Chief, you have to give me justice! This crazy woman has humiliated me like this! How am I supposed to live from now on?”
The village chief’s face practically crumbled.
You brought this upon yourself!
Who told you to provoke a crazy woman?
“Stop crying for now.”
But Hu-shi refused to listen and wailed even louder.
“Village Chief! You have to make her family compensate me! Otherwise… otherwise I’ll just die right in front of you!”
The village chief felt like his head was about to explode.
This woman was determined to take shamelessness to the very end.
“Quickly, go call Madam Lü over!”
“No need! No need!” Xiang Xi said. “Just stuff her mouth shut and she won’t cry anymore!”
The village chief’s expression changed.
“Xiang-shi, don’t do anything reckless! Hurry, several of you, stop her!”
But it was too late.
Xiang Xi grabbed two huge cucumbers and charged toward Hu-shi while yelling.
The moment Hu-shi saw what was happening, she realized she was in serious trouble.
She didn’t have time to cry and wail anymore. She rolled and crawled into the house and slammed the door shut.
Xiang Xi sneered.
You want compensation?
This lady will compensate you with two big cucumbers!
“Second Fool!”
“Present!”
“Prepare the imperial carriage! We’re going up the mountain!”
“Yes!”
In full view of everyone, Second Fool carried Xiang Xi on his back and ran off like a raging bull.
No one went after them.
After all, it had nothing to do with them.
The only person with a headache was the village chief.
Something this serious had happened, and Hu-shi definitely wouldn’t let the matter go.
Once her husband came home, he would probably make a huge scene at the Liu household.
For the sake of maintaining peace and stability in Nan Zhu Village, the village chief could only force himself to go to the Liu family first and inform Madam Lü.
Perhaps he could persuade her to pay some compensation and settle the matter.
But the moment he thought about Madam Lü’s temper—and the fact that she and Hu-shi were sworn enemies—his headache only grew worse.
The village chief sighed.
Hopefully, Heaven would protect him.
“What did you say?”
In the Liu family’s courtyard, Madam Lü and the others nearly popped their eyes out.
The village chief had just told them that the crazy woman in their household had used cucumbers to… well, assault Hu-shi.
“Serves her right!”
Madam Lü suddenly felt incredibly refreshed.
That Hu-shi had relied on being younger than her and even more shameless than her to fight her on equal terms for all these years.
Today, she had finally gotten what she deserved!
And finally, Madam Lü wasn’t the only one suffering at the hands of that crazy woman!
Heavens had finally opened their eyes!
“Hu-shi was probably injured,” the village chief said. “So your family will have to pay some money for her medical expenses…”
“Why?” Madam Lü was practically laughing from anger. “When she injured me, why didn’t she have to compensate me?”
That was because you two had been fighting each other!
You both injured each other!
But Xiang-shi had beaten Hu-shi unilaterally!