That night, the revelry stretched late into the hours. Once Gu Ming decided to stay, she was targeted for even more rounds of drinks. Worried about her sensitive stomach, Xiao-ou secretly intercepted several glasses for her. As the colleagues gradually dispersed, a weary Gu Ming finally entered the room and flipped on the light. She hadn’t expected the unreliable reality of the situation: there was only one bed.
“Only one bed?” She leaned against the doorframe, letting out a faint, stunned laugh.
Xiao-ou kept a safe distance, her heart thumping against her ribs. Fearing Gu Ming might be displeased, she hurriedly explained, “Maybe I should go find Chi Wei. You should take this room, President Gu.”
“These are the toiletries I just bought at the inn’s shop. The quality might not be great, so please just make do with them.”
Gu Ming suddenly reached out and took her hand. “Forget it. Look what time it is; don’t bother. We’ll just sleep like this tonight. Fortunately, the bed is quite large.” Softened by the alcohol, Gu Ming took the toiletries, thanked her, and headed into the bathroom.
Xiao-ou collapsed onto the small sofa by the bed. This inn was considered the best in town, but it was a far cry from the five-star hotels in Chengdu. The amenities were simple: a desk, a TV, and two armchairs. Hearing the “shshsh” of the shower, Xiao-ou felt as though she were in a trance. She got up to boil some water, her phone buzzing incessantly as the group chat continued its chaotic storm, oblivious to the fact that it was time for sleep.
Feeling a bit lightheaded, Xiao-ou didn’t bother with the phone. The old Nokia was painfully slow at loading WeChat anyway. I’ll buy a new phone tomorrow when we’re back in the city, she thought.
Gu Ming emerged from the bathroom with a towel wrapped around her head and another around her body, revealing her elegant collarbones. She leaned forward slightly, drying her hair with one hand while clutching the front of the bath towel with the other. Xiao-ou stole a quick glance before grabbing her pajamas and bolting into the bathroom.
The night in the small town was silent. Outside the window was the courtyard the owner had modeled after a traditional quadrangle. Occasional chirps of late-summer insects punctuated the quiet. Gu Ming sat on the sofa, her eyelids heavy, stubbornly drying her hair with the blow dryer, her fingers raking through the strands.
Xiao-ou stayed in the bathroom for a long time, scrubbing until her skin turned red. Hoping Gu Ming had fallen asleep, she finally stepped out in her nightgown. But Gu Ming wasn’t in bed. She was slumped in the armchair, her head tilted to the side, the hair dryer abandoned on the coffee table. Xiao-ou leaned in closer; Gu Ming’s eyes were shut, her breathing deep. She had clearly fallen asleep mid-dry. Xiao-ou had never seen her like this—her long, damp hair scattered, smelling faintly of the shampoo Xiao-ou loved.
“President Gu?” she whispered. “Mmm…” Gu Ming gave a faint, hazy response. “Go sleep in the bed.” “Mmm…” Gu Ming hummed but didn’t move. Fearing she would wake up with a stiff neck, Xiao-ou took her arm to pull her up. Gu Ming, caught in the twilight of sleep, didn’t even open her eyes. She leaned her weight entirely on Xiao-ou without a shred of defense. It was only a few steps to the bed. As Xiao-ou guided her, Gu Ming tumbled onto the mattress; losing her balance, Xiao-ou fell forward too, her face landing right against Gu Ming’s fragrant shoulder. Her skin was so fair Xiao-ou felt a sudden, mad urge to bite it. She froze, heart racing, while Gu Ming merely shifted her legs and curled up.
…
The Long Night
Guilt-ridden and flustered, Xiao-ou scrambled off the bed. Seeing how deeply Gu Ming was sleeping, she didn’t dare use the loud hair dryer. She sat on the sofa for a long time, towel-drying her hair as the moonlight—nearly full for the Mid-Autumn Festival—spilled into the room, casting a surreal, hazy glow over everything.
She felt like she was floating on clouds. In the dim light, the moonbeams highlighted Gu Ming’s bare shoulders. Since she hadn’t planned to stay, she had no pajamas; she was wearing the cheap ones Xiao-ou had bought at the inn’s stall. Is she wearing anything under that towel-wrap? Xiao-ou wondered. Probably not, she realized, recalling the purple lace lingerie Gu Ming had left in the bathroom. Xiao-ou looked away, her throat dry. It seemed every time she got close to Gu Ming, alcohol had to be the catalyst. Without it, they were just a third-rate supervisor from the 8th floor and a Vice President from the 10th.
I have to work harder if I want to catch up to her, she told herself. But what did Gu Ming like? She probably liked men—men like her fiancé? Thinking of how heartbroken Gu Ming had been, Xiao-ou felt a pang of jealousy toward the fiancé, Shi Lei. He was handsome in a rugged way, but to make a woman who likes men fall for a woman… it felt like a moth flying into a flame. Xiao-ou rested her head in her hand. She wanted a real relationship, someone who wouldn’t eventually leave to get married. She hadn’t even come out to her own family yet, but she knew she’d never marry a man. So how did she end up falling for someone so unreachable?
At least Gu Ming didn’t hate her. Xiao-ou decided that once the heartbreak passed, she’d test the waters and see how Gu Ming felt about same-sex relationships. If the reaction was too negative, she’d treat this all as a beautiful dream. She shook her head, wondering what was wrong with that man—why cheat on someone as wonderful as Gu Ming? If it were her, she would only ever have eyes for Gu Ming.
Eventually, her body grew stiff and heavy. She crept to the bed and lay down cautiously. Looking at the woman just inches away, she suddenly thought of Lu An’s scandalous ID: “Touch You All Over.” How shameful! How indecent! And yet, Xiao-ou’s own hands felt like they were growing vines, reaching out toward Gu Ming of their own accord. She tucked her hands under her body and turned away with a long sigh. I’ve been hanging out with Chi Wei too much; I’m picking up her bad habits.
She didn’t sleep well. She tossed and turned, worried about waking Gu Ming, but she couldn’t bear to look away. This was a once-in-a-lifetime chance to look at her this closely, this shamelessly. She slowly turned back to face her. Gu Ming’s brow furrowed slightly in her sleep. Xiao-ou held her breath. Gu Ming’s lips were a soft, vibrant red—a perfect, sexy shape. Would it be soft to kiss them? Xiao-ou pinched her palm. She had lived all these years and hadn’t even had her first kiss. Is this what love was? This intense craving for physical touch? She’d never felt this way about the senior she liked in college.
In the end, she didn’t dare kiss her. She was terrified Gu Ming would wake up and kick her off the bed. Instead, she reached out with a hand that shook like a leaf and briefly, softly, touched Gu Ming’s cheek. That’s enough, she thought. Really, it’s enough.
Gu Ming was huddled tightly in the duvet, clearly someone who lacked a sense of security. There was only one blanket, and Gu Ming had claimed it all. Though it was early September, the night air was chilly. Xiao-ou didn’t dare tug at the blanket.
Inevitably, Xiao-ou caught a cold. The sound of her sneezing the next morning woke Gu Ming up. Gu Ming rose with sleepy eyes, while Xiao-ou lay there, her head throbbing. By the time Xiao-ou managed to clear her foggy brain, Gu Ming had already washed up, changed, and walked out the door.
She’s just… leaving? Just like that? Xiao-ou thought miserably. I have a cold, President Gu! You could at least ask! You’re the one who stole the blanket last night…