“Here are the rules of the game: Everyone will receive a headband with the name of a different item written on it. You can see what’s on other people’s headbands, but you can’t see what’s on your own.
Each person takes turns speaking one sentence. The speaker can choose someone they’d like to go on a date with and describe the item on that person’s head using indirect language. If the other person guesses correctly, the two of you will be set up on a one-on-one date today. The first person to complete the task gets first pick of the date location!”
The rules were pretty simple, and everyone agreed.
Everyone put on their headbands and sat in a circle.
Tang Yao glanced around the circle. On Gu Jingchen’s head was “watermelon candy”; on Ling Xinran’s was a capybara; on Sun Rongli’s was a turkey; on Fu Yang’s was “Grandfather Sun”[1]Grandfather Sun: A playful, literal translation used mostly in children’s stories or nursery rhymes to give the sun a friendly, human face. jQuery('#footnote_plugin_tooltip_2978532_1_1').tooltip({ tip: '#footnote_plugin_tooltip_text_2978532_1_1', tipClass: 'footnote_tooltip', effect: 'fade', predelay: 0, fadeInSpeed: 200, delay: 400, fadeOutSpeed: 200, position: 'top center', relative: true, offset: [-7, 0], });; and on Zhou Jinheng’s was “502 Glue.”
Judging by how this whole thing played out in the original story, hers was probably “dung”…
Director Li pointed at someone at random. “Let’s start with Mr. Gu.”
Gu Jingchen’s eyes darted around, pausing on Tang Yao’s head for three seconds before shifting to Ling Xinran.
“Xinran, it’s an internet slang term.”
Ling Xinran nodded.
Next up was Ling Xinran. She looked at the top of Gu Jingchen’s head, thought for a moment, and said:
“It’s a type of fruit.
Next was Fu Yang. He turned to look at Tang Yao, who was cracking sunflower seeds in front of him. Just as he was about to speak, a male voice rang out.
“Teacher Tang, look—everyone else has already formed teams. No one wants us, so we’ll just have to make do,” Zhou Jinheng said, feigning helplessness.
Fu Yang immediately clamped his mouth shut.
The live chat erupted in screams.
[Aaaah! Zhou Jinheng, get a grip! Xinran hasn’t chosen a partner yet, you idiot!]
[Xiao Sun is so cute—why would he go on a date with that crazy woman Tang Yao??!]
[Wait, no! There’s chemistry here!]
[Ma[2]from JaiMa jQuery('#footnote_plugin_tooltip_2978532_1_2').tooltip({ tip: '#footnote_plugin_tooltip_text_2978532_1_2', tipClass: 'footnote_tooltip', effect: 'fade', predelay: 0, fadeInSpeed: 200, delay: 400, fadeOutSpeed: 200, position: 'top center', relative: true, offset: [-7, 0], }); Da[3]Xu Jun Da jQuery('#footnote_plugin_tooltip_2978532_1_3').tooltip({ tip: '#footnote_plugin_tooltip_text_2978532_1_3', tipClass: 'footnote_tooltip', effect: 'fade', predelay: 0, fadeInSpeed: 200, delay: 400, fadeOutSpeed: 200, position: 'top center', relative: true, offset: [-7, 0], }); CP!? I’m shipping them hard!!]
[What the hell, a ship???? That’s insane!!]
[Keep cursing!]
[If the main couple doesn’t ship, the fans who’re shipping them have to taste the saltiness!]
Gu Jingchen immediately turned to look at Tang Yao, waiting for her to speak.
Tang Yao tossed the sunflower seed shells into the trash can and turned to face Zhou Jinheng.
“You’re so good at pairing people up—are you out of your mind?”
Zhou Jinheng lowered his head and smiled shyly. “The moment I laid eyes on Teacher Tang, my heart was gone. What good is my life then??”
Everyone: !!
Live stream chat: !!
Tang Yao: ??
She jumped to her feet, gritting her teeth. “Teacher Zhou, we’re not a good match.”
On that variety show, you were so arrogant—if you dare flirt with I your father, your future is bleak!
Zhou Jinheng looked puzzled. “Why? What’s wrong with us?”
Tang Yao sat back down and sighed. “Because I’m born in the Year of the Monkey, and you’re born in the Year of the Dragon. If we’re together, we’ll suffer from ‘Monkey-Dragon Pain.’”
Zhou Jinheng: “……” He really was born in the Year of the Dragon.
[Hahaha! What the hell is “Monkey-Dragon Pain”?!]
[I’m dying of laughter, hahaha.]
“Hahaha!”
Fu Yang couldn’t hold it in any longer and burst out laughing, causing everyone in the room to immediately turn their gaze toward him.
It was as if they were all asking: Is that so funny?
He instantly played it cool, “I… my teeth feel a little hot, so I’m letting them get some fresh air…”
Meanwhile, he was crying his heart out inside. It was clearly hilarious! Why isn’t anyone laughing? Have you all gone through rehab or something?!
[After exchanging glances, it’s clear there aren’t many normal people on this dating show.]
[Hahaha, the pure, innocent stupidity of youth.]
[One moment of being outgoing has earned him a lifetime of introversion.]
“Ahem, okay, okay, back to the topic at hand. Fu Yang, let’s begin,” Ling Xinran steered the conversation back on track, speaking gently to Fu Yang.
Fu Yang could only turn to Sun Rongli at his side. “It’s an animal.”
Sun Rongli nodded. “The one on your head gets really hot when it appears.”
Fu Yang’s eyes lit up—he had pretty much figured out what it was!
“The sun!” he shouted.
The director shook his head. “Close, but no. Next.”
Fu Yang wasn’t discouraged. He was sure he’d guess it right in the next round—and then he’d be in first place!
Next up was Zhou Jinheng. When he saw the huge pile of dung perched on Tang Yao’s head, he couldn’t help but burst out laughing.
Tang Yao’s face turned beet-red. “Teacher Zhou, are your teeth hot too?”
[Hahahaha, hot teeth!!]
[A big pile of dung, hahahahaha…]
[Whoever designed this deserves a chicken drumstick!]
Zhou Jinheng suppressed his laughter, thought for a moment, and said:
“It’s a few brush strokes better than humans.”[4]from the slang – “Even a pile of feces has two more brushes(more capable) than humans.” jQuery('#footnote_plugin_tooltip_2978532_1_4').tooltip({ tip: '#footnote_plugin_tooltip_text_2978532_1_4', tipClass: 'footnote_tooltip', effect: 'fade', predelay: 0, fadeInSpeed: 200, delay: 400, fadeOutSpeed: 200, position: 'top center', relative: true, offset: [-7, 0], });
Everyone: ?
[So does that mean we’re not even “dung”??]
[That’s some really crude language.]
[So I’ve been misjudging myself all along—Am I an incompetent piece of “dung]
[Whoa, Mr. Zhou, you actually thought of that?!]
[But who could possibly figure out this description?]
[I don’t know about others, but Tang Yao might be able to.]
[Hah, if she can figure it out, I’ll just go eat some shit!]
[Hah, that little brat must be dying of envy, huh?]
Tang Yao shrugged: “It’s just shit, isn’t it?”
The crowd, still processing: ?
Isn’t that a cheat code?!
[No way! Tang Yao actually guessed that?!]
[There’s gotta be some inside info here, right?! How could she guess that?!]
[The one supposed to “eat shit”—where is he??]
[I’m right next to him; he just fell asleep.]
[No problem—he can eat it when he wakes up.]
The director was completely baffled.
He’d deliberately given Tang Yao the hardest clue to guess, intending for her to come in last—so how did she figure it out right away?
The director frowned and turned to the camera operator beside him, his eyes full of suspicion.
The camera operator immediately explained, “I really did tell her to just be a background extra! She agreed to it, too!”
Wait, why isn’t this girl playing by the rules?!
Gu Jingchen was the first to express his disbelief. He stood up and frowned, saying, “Ms. Tang, aren’t you a little too spot-on? You guessed it right based on just one sentence?”
He was implying that Tang Yao had inside information.
“Yeah, Ms. Tang, this game wouldn’t be any fun if it went on like this,” Ling Xinran suddenly chimed in.
“Ha!”
Before Tang Yao could say a word, Zhou Jinheng burst out laughing.
Gu Jingchen immediately turned to look at him, hostility in his eyes.
“Teacher Zhou, what are you laughing at?”
Zhou Jinheng raised his eyes to meet Gu Jingchen’s gaze, the smile still lingering on his face.
“What ‘inside story’? It’s clearly just that Teacher Tang and I are on the same wavelength, okay?”
After saying that, Zhou Jinheng turned to look at the person beside him.
“Right, Teacher Tang?”
Tang Yao’s gaze flitted between their faces before she finally reached a conclusion.
“You’re handsome—your good looks speak for yourself. You’ve got a point.”
Gu Jingchen: ??
[Zhou Jinheng really is handsome!]
[The person above, come sit down and eat!]
[That made me laugh. Isn’t Gu Jingchen the most handsome? How could that ambiguous-looking guy compare to such a striking face? Are you all blind?]
Reply to the post above: [Are you a hater of Gu Jingchen? Why are you dragging him like this?]
Reply to the post above: [Hehe]
[……]
[No, I admit Zhou Jinheng is pretty handsome, but Movie Emperor Gu isn’t half bad either, okay! Especially his eyes—don’t you guys feel they have a bit of a rogue-like vibe?]
[Rogue eyes?]
[?]
“Tang Yao! You!” Gu Jingchen’s face darkened, but he couldn’t refute it.
In the end, the director stepped in to explain that Tang Yao hadn’t known about it beforehand, so the matter was dropped.
Soon, the game ended, and the results were announced.
Tang Yao and Zhou Jinheng took first place, Fu Yang and Sun Rongli came in second, while Gu Jingchen and Ling Xinran brought up the rear.
Seeing the screen flooded with resentment from the live stream viewers, the director immediately slipped Tang Yao aside.
The director’s expression was stern, and the look in his eyes as he stared at Tang Yao was anything but friendly.
“Ms. Tang, I recall the contract was very clear: you were here to serve as a prop. What exactly are you doing now? Do you still want your appearance fee?!”
Upon hearing this, Tang Yao clapped her hands.
“I’m innocent, Director!”
The director was startled by Tang Yao’s sudden outburst. “Innocent?!”
Tang Yao bounced over to the director’s side and said:
“That’s right! I’ve been trying my hardest to slack off, but Zhou Jinheng is a pro! I’m winning without even trying! This is a two-player game—you should tell Zhou Jinheng to slack off too!”
The director suddenly realized, “Oh, oh! … No way.”
Zhou Jinheng is the young master of the Zhou family! How could he possibly dare to make any demands of him?!
If the Zhou family came after him, he’d be done for.
But Gu Jingchen and Ling Xinran were his own children, and the audience was here to watch them!
Tang Yao: “Why?”
The original novel revolved entirely around the romance between the male and female leads—Zhou Jinheng wasn’t even mentioned. Could he be some hidden powerhouse??
The director looked troubled as he turned to Tang Yao.
If he couldn’t solve the problem, he’d pass it on to someone else.
“Ms. Tang, this is your job now. I don’t care what methods you use—in the next game, Academy Award-winning actor Gu and Ling Xinran must come in first, and you… must come in last.”
Tang Yao almost leaped to her feet, but the director held up five fingers, and with a quick “Pan Zhou Dan”-style dodge[5]The “Pan Zhou Dan-style dodge” or quirky entrance is a viral internet meme inspired by Zhou Dan Pan, an Oxford engineering student who made an eccentric, aggressive shoulder-swiveling … Continue reading jQuery('#footnote_plugin_tooltip_2978532_1_5').tooltip({ tip: '#footnote_plugin_tooltip_text_2978532_1_5', tipClass: 'footnote_tooltip', effect: 'fade', predelay: 0, fadeInSpeed: 200, delay: 400, fadeOutSpeed: 200, position: 'top center', relative: true, offset: [-7, 0], });, she sat back down.
“Got it, Director. Count on me,” Tang Yao smiled.
“By any means necessary”? Isn’t the director basically handing her money?
References[+]