Shang Yinyu’s heart gave a thump. It was not that he feared Nineteen would, because of what happened in the hot spring, take advantage of there being no one around to attack him.
Nineteen was extremely good at enduring. He had been bullied by him for so many years and had had his body ruined by him, yet he had endured until the world was at peace and he held great power before opposing him. He would certainly not attack him at this time.
He just felt cold. On a rainy night like this, on the icy floor, in thin, ill-fitting inner clothes, with the skin of his wrists and ankles exposed to the air, and barefoot besides… how cold that must be.
Shang Yinyu pulled the quilt tighter. He wanted to lie down and go on sleeping. Anyway, Nineteen did not dare move against him, and being used to being attended, a person standing stuck at the bedside would not affect his sleep.
The thought of lying down came to him several times, but his gaze could not be moved away from the person quietly kneeling prostrate on the floor. Shang Yinyu was irritated and asked: “How long do you plan to kneel?”
The room was silent for a few seconds, and Shang Yinyu heard the person on the floor answer: “This subordinate does not know.”
What kind of answer was that? But the tone of the other carried hesitation, as if he really had not thought about how long he would kneel.
Nineteen knelt very close. Shang Yinyu could touch the crown of Nineteen’s head by reaching out. He twirled a lock of Nineteen’s hair around his finger. “Why are you kneeling?”
“This subordinate, to attend Master’s…”
Nineteen’s voice grew even lower afterward. Shang Yinyu faintly heard a word like “bed” in it, and the hand twined in Nineteen’s hair stopped at once.
Absurd! Would that block of wood Nineteen say such a thing?
For a moment Shang Yinyu even wondered whether the two words had some meaning he did not know, such as keeping watch at the side of the bed to serve, like night duty.
But no.
What palace servant, serving the emperor on night duty, would dare use those two words?
Shang Yinyu looked at Nineteen again and found that he had pulled Nineteen’s hair taut. Nineteen was still silently lying prostrate, as though not minding in the least the pain of his hair being pulled.
“Get up first.” Shang Yinyu let go, letting Nineteen’s hair slip from his fingers.
He watched Nineteen rise stiffly and moved a bit into the inside of the couch, saying: “Sit.”
Nineteen adjusted his inner breath so as not to show his tension and awkwardness. He walked slowly to the head of the couch and sat down, reached out and carefully lifted a corner of the brocade quilt, quickly moved himself in, then covered himself with the quilt, and only then looked at the emperor uneasily.
Shang Yinyu glared at him. What are you doing! I told you to sit on the edge of the couch, not to climb straight on!
“Master? Did this subordinate do something wrong?” Nineteen was a bit uneasy, his hand tightening slightly on the brocade quilt.
“No.” Shang Yinyu did not argue with him. At this time and place, that face was too close to him and he felt a little uncomfortable, and said only: “I want a drink. Go and bring me the pot of Peach Blossom Smile from the table outside.”
Shang Yinyu had no time to think of a good reason. He only wanted to send Nineteen away quickly. The shadow the other had left on him on this dragon couch before his rebirth made him unable to relax.
Fortunately, the Nineteen of the enduring period did what he said and obeyed, and got off the couch without even asking why.
Shang Yinyu watched Nineteen turn, shifted back a bit further, pressed a hand under the brocade quilt at the innermost side of the dragon couch, and the outline of a dagger felt by his palm settled him a little.
Those two night raids by Qiao Beiji had given him a psychological shadow. The man had once pinned him down on this couch and used those martial artist’s hands to cover his calls for help…
Although Shang Yinyu had not felt any pain, and his death had not felt real either, at the moment Nineteen climbed on, he still instinctively wanted to look for something to defend himself with.
Shang Yinyu watched Nineteen go around the screen and in, withdrew the hand pressed under the brocade quilt, and adjusted his mood to wait.
“Master.” Nineteen sat back in the spot he had been in before and respectfully offered the wine with both hands. Master was too far from him, so he needed to lean forward in order to pass the wine to a position Master could easily take.
Shang Yinyu looked at Nineteen holding the white jade spouted wine pot and one wine cup, and was silent for a second.
Did Nineteen know his own tolerance was poor, and to prevent himself from saying things he must not say after getting drunk, simply not take a cup for himself?
Shang Yinyu took the wine pot. He did not mind Nineteen’s little scheming. If he made it plain that he meant to get Nineteen drunk, could Nineteen refuse to drink?
Unless the other no longer wanted to endure.
“Nineteen, come to my side.” Shang Yinyu gave Nineteen a smile.
If his estimate was off, the dagger under the brocade quilt was his last trump card. Naturally Shang Yinyu would not leave this life-saving spot, so he could only have Nineteen come over.
Nineteen approached obediently, still carefully holding the wine cup that he had not received.
“Shadow guards are strictly forbidden to drink to excess. Nineteen, how long has it been since you tasted wine?” Shang Yinyu still did not take the cup. He reached out and touched Nineteen’s cheek, pinching and pressing it neither lightly nor heavily.
“This subordinate strictly follows the shadow guard precepts. Since entering the shadow guard I have never touched wine.”
Nineteen had his face pinched and spoke with some difficulty, but still answered urgently, as if very afraid the emperor would think he was not a qualified shadow guard.
Of course, this could also be the other’s deliberate show, to make him give up the idea of bestowing wine.
Ever since he had broken with Qiao Beiji, when Shang Yinyu recalled Nineteen’s past words and actions, he felt those seemingly pleasing words and gestures all carried another layer of meaning.
His Nineteen was truly sharp and clever. He had only been silent for a few seconds on seeing Nineteen bring just one wine cup, and the other had noticed his intention to pour him drink.
But, I’m no longer the me who is fooled by your surface. Nineteen, I will not go soft on you.
Shang Yinyu pinched Nineteen’s chin and, applying force very skillfully, made Nineteen open his mouth.
He put the spout of the white jade wine pot into Nineteen’s mouth and tilted it slightly, and the wine mixed with the scent of flowers and a faint pink flowed out.
A man who, however he was bullied, could endure and submit year after year, would he resist him over a pot of wine?
Shang Yinyu was actually a little expectant.
Nineteen really did not know how to drink, but the one making him drink was his master.
With the wine in his mouth, he forced himself to swallow.
Nineteen had not tasted wine in many years and dared to swallow only in small sips. He did not keep up with the speed at which Shang Yinyu poured, and pale pink wine flowed out along the corner of Nineteen’s mouth.
Shang Yinyu stared darkly at the wine overflowing from the corner of Nineteen’s mouth. His hand moved slightly and raised the wine pot a little more level, and the pouring slowed too.
He would not give Nineteen a chance to deliberately drink less.
Only when the pot was empty and not a drop more could be poured did Shang Yinyu withdraw his hand.
Nineteen’s face was already bright red, and his ink-colored eyes seemed covered with a layer of mist. He looked blankly at Shang Yinyu in front of him, then seemed to realize there were still watermarks of wine at the corner of his mouth, and in panic raised his sleeve to wipe them.
His hand stopped halfway up, and, not knowing what he had thought of, he put it down again, and quietly smoothed out the crease in his cuff.
Shang Yinyu saw all of Nineteen’s little movements. Watching Nineteen’s face get redder and redder, as if about to burn, he said in time: “Do not use inner force to disperse the wine.”
Nineteen paused, the flush on his face receded a little, and he said in a low, hoarse voice: “This subordinate obeys.”
The inner force he had just used had not driven off all the effect of the wine; on the contrary it had made the effect spread completely, and Nineteen’s body swayed ever so slightly.
Shang Yinyu tentatively handed the wine pot to Nineteen and said: “Put it on the table.”
Nineteen took the pot, opened his eyes wide and looked at it for a good while before nodding, his word order muddled: “Put back… obey…”
Shang Yinyu watched Nineteen, with a stern iceberg face, turn around holding the little pot and cup, and reminded him: “You don’t need to go out. Just put it on the table in the inner hall.”
He was afraid Nineteen would drive off the effect of the wine somewhere he could not see.
Shang Yinyu watched Nineteen’s steps. He knew very well what Nineteen was like when drunk: once drunk, even walking would involuntarily use lightness skill, stepping lightly on the ground as if able to leave it at any time.
Before he and Qiao Beiji turned against each other, whenever Qiao Beiji had drunk, he would half-hold the other as they walked, afraid that a gust of wind would carry Qiao Beiji away.
Nineteen lifted the brocade quilt and got off the couch, then his figure flashed and he appeared at the table. After setting down what he was holding, his figure flashed again, and a figure kneeling on one knee appeared before Shang Yinyu.
“Nineteen pays respects to Master.”
Shang Yinyu looked at the man kneeling ramrod straight, pressing on his quilt.
Very good. He dared to press my quilt. He’s quite drunk.
Shang Yinyu relaxed somewhat, leaned back, and, hugging the quilt, looked at the man in front of him.
Half a day into his rebirth, he still had not decided how to treat Nineteen.
He wanted to put Qiao Beiji’s betrayal of him on Nineteen’s head, but he needed to keep him to fight wars for him. He wanted to be a wise ruler with a worthy minister alongside Nineteen, but with the hot spring incident that day, Nineteen had probably long since grown estranged from him.
Shang Yinyu stretched out a hand and said: “Come closer.”
Nineteen obediently shuffled closer on his knees.
The best thing about Nineteen was that even drunk he obeyed his every word.
Shang Yinyu poked Nineteen’s cheek and asked: “Do you still remember what you and I did today in the Begonia Bath?”
“This subordinate remembers.”
Shang Yinyu looked at Nineteen’s cheeks. Nineteen’s face seemed to have gotten even redder than before.
Shang Yinyu suspected Nineteen was using inner force again. His fingers moved and tapped Nineteen several times, sealing his dantian and inner force.
He raised his eyes to look, and now not only Nineteen’s face was red but his ears too.
Shang Yinyu did not understand why, and took it that the wine had been poured too fast this time and the strength of the wine had come up into his face.
Continuing the earlier topic, Shang Yinyu instructed: “Reenact for me the whole process in the Begonia Bath. You are not to leave out any detail.”
Nineteen answered yes, and afterward kept gazing at Shang Yinyu, as if waiting for something.
Shang Yinyu understood. The one who had started it was him.
He had already had a guess about this, and said: “Just reenact it on yourself. You don’t need to mind me.”
“I obey.” Nineteen answered, lowered his head, and began.
Shang Yinyu had long since lost count of how many times he had seen such a picture.
Having been together for so many years, he knew every part of Nineteen’s body like the back of his hand.
Shang Yinyu did not feel embarrassed either. He watched Nineteen, not missing a single detail.
At the same time he thought in his heart: if he really had bullied Nineteen, how should he then keep Nineteen from developing murderous intent toward him?
If he hadn’t, how should he tell Nineteen that he felt only brotherly feeling for him and had no thought of going any further?
Nineteen put his inner clothes to one side and then raised his hand, simulating the scene in his memory, and said: “Master first did this to this subordinate, and then this…”
After a description, Nineteen said: “Master did this, and then discovered this subordinate’s difference.”
Nineteen’s mood visibly sank.
Shang Yinyu was already crying “It’s over” in his heart. He knew very well what his own nature was. For a first time as novel as this, he would certainly have had to appreciate it properly.
He might even have put Nineteen on a rock above the hot spring water and made him spread open to show him. He had indeed done so before.
Following this process, it would be more humiliating than if he had simply taken him.
Shang Yinyu raised a hand to cover his eyes. He no longer dared to look at the scene that came next, and only heard Nineteen’s voice, seeming a little lower, continue.
“After that, Master was startled and stepped back, and fell into the water.”
“?!” Shang Yinyu lowered the hand blocking his eyes. He knew this description well. Wasn’t it just what had happened when he first came back from rebirth?
Was that already the end?
Shang Yinyu expressed his confusion with his eyes.
Nineteen was probably drunk and muddled, and did not look at Shang Yinyu at all, his eyes and brows lowered, not moving.
It looked like it was indeed over.
Shang Yinyu used the quilt to press down on a part of himself that was not behaving, while thinking happily in his heart:
This time I didn’t bully Nineteen like that. Although what I did was a bit excessive, by forcing a turn it could still be passed off as brotherly feeling and youthful curiosity.
As long as Nineteen could be made to believe it, they could be a wise ruler and worthy minister, and a thousand years later be a famous pair in history.
Shang Yinyu was about to tell Nineteen to withdraw, and then go soak in a bath himself, when he heard Nineteen say hoarsely:
“Master was frightened by this subordinate’s difference from ordinary people. This subordinate is an oddity, so Master came to detest this subordinate, no longer wanted this subordinate, and got up and left…”
Nineteen’s voice was very soft, and Shang Yinyu had to listen very carefully to barely get the gist.
After understanding what Nineteen was saying, Shang Yinyu did not know how to react.
If it had been in the past, when he and Nineteen were still on good terms, if Nineteen said this, he would lay Nineteen down on the couch and love this difference from ordinary people properly.
If it had been when he was contesting power with the Guardian General, Qiao Beiji saying this would surely be an attempt at evasion; not only could he not touch him, he would have to say things like how brave and martial the General was to pretend to comfort him, putting on the look of a wise ruler.
But now, one of them was an emperor who already knew the future, and the other was a shadow guard whose drunkenness had not yet cleared and who was not quite sober.
I didn’t detest you because of it, and I didn’t stop touching you. Originally I would have been with you in the Begonia Bath; originally, originally you and I would have had many days and nights, with temples pressed together, with scheming and open struggles…