Lin Guanqing was stunned. Evidently, he had not expected her to say such a thing, and once it registered, he felt rather awkward.
This was because he recalled how, out of anger on a previous occasion, he had spoken without thinking, uttering words about how gentle, kind, and considerate she was. His face suddenly felt as though it were burning.
He abruptly stood up from his chair, reached his hands out and then instinctively pulled them back, fumbling clumsily before finally slapping the armrest and hastily explaining:
“Look, please do not misunderstand. Everything I said that day was just spoken in anger. I was only playing around and deliberately trying to upset my Senior Sister. I have no feelings for you at all, so please do not misunderstand.”
He assumed Shen Xiu had misunderstood. After all, those words sounded truly inappropriate; it was exceedingly frivolous of him to utter such spiteful remarks when he did not even like the person. If this young woman had simply brushed it off, that would have been one thing, but if she had actually taken it to heart, it would truly be his grave fault.
Upon hearing this, Shen Xiu merely pressed her lips together and smiled faintly.
She raised her head slightly, her face displaying neither annoyance nor a sense of loss, and her gaze remained as gentle as ever:
“Since that is the case, why does the Young Master not simply explain everything clearly to Miss Meng?”
Lin Guanqing let out a confused “Huh?”, thinking he had misheard, and asked, “What did you say?”
Shen Xiu gently shook her head, smiling just as she usually did, her tone remaining mild, “I said, although I have not spent much time in the Young Master’s company, I can still sense that the Young Master has changed a great deal these past few days. You always wear a cold expression and no longer even visit the back mountains. It is clear that you still care very much about Miss Meng in your heart.”
Lin Guanqing parted his lips in slight surprise, not expecting her to voice such observations.
However, he remained noncommittal about her final remark.
He certainly cared about his Senior Sister’s attitude, but caring was one thing, whereas lowering his pride to yield was an entirely different matter.
He roughly understood her intent and, suspecting she was acting as a mediator, felt a touch of displeasure, which naturally showed on his face.
Yet, because he wanted to hear what her underlying motive might be, he kept silent and refrained from stopping her, simply watching her quietly.
“So, do you also believe that I am in the wrong?” Lin Guanqing lifted his eyelids, gazing quietly at her.
Shen Xiu did not give a direct yes or no answer; instead, following the flow of the conversation, she brought up the events of the previous night.
Her tone remained unhurried and steady, making it easy for anyone to calm down by following the rhythm of her voice. Therefore, speaking of these matters did not make them feel difficult to accept.
Lin Guanqing heard her softly begin, “Actually, the Young Master also knows that he should not have gone to the pleasure house to drink last night, correct?”
Lin Guanqing opened his mouth, desperately wanting to retort, but meeting Shen Xiu’s gentle, calm, and knowing gaze, the words that had been right at the tip of his tongue felt as though they were blocked by something.
He replied with a cold face, sounding petulant, “Even if that is so, am I not allowed to do what I enjoy? You feel I should not have gone, but I went anyway, so what of it?”
This remark sounded inexplicably childlike.
Shen Xiu shook her head instead, letting out a soft, helpless laugh, “In truth, the Young Master did not want to do what he enjoyed; rather, he wanted to do something that would make Miss Meng care. Not the concern of a senior sister toward a junior brother, but the concern of a woman toward a man.”
Only after saying this did Shen Xiu raise her eyes to look at him, her gaze as gentle as ever, “The Young Master likes Miss Meng, which is why you constantly think of ways to provoke her attention.”
When she finished speaking, the air seemed to grow quiet for a brief moment.
Lin Guanqing never expected that his inner thoughts would be seen through so thoroughly by an outsider. He felt both a sense of strangeness and a lingering wonder as to why she could see through him so clearly, and why his Senior Sister could not understand.
Shen Xiu did not concern herself with the thoughts running through his mind. She simply watched him quietly and continued, “Since the Young Master cares so much about Miss Meng, you should explain things clearly to her instead of continually doing things that cause her pain. Affection itself is never something that should feel like a burden.”
“The Young Master has continually tested Miss Meng’s bottom line. Have you ever considered that if one day Miss Meng truly becomes heartbroken and leaves, by then the Young Master will be left with nothing but regret.”
Hearing this, Lin Guanqing fell silent, though his heart sank heavily.
In truth, he did harbor a faint sense of regret; the tone he used last night had indeed been a bit too harsh. But he had been in the heat of the moment, and with several of his fellow apprentices present, being subjected to such a harsh, scolding lecture by his Senior Sister had been utterly humiliating, to say the least. Especially when she accused him of willfully degrading himself, how could he possibly not care?
However, because he had spoken so rigidly the previous night, he simply could not swallow his pride to apologize now, and regretting it was already a bit too late.
A heavy feeling settled in Lin Guanqing’s chest, and his furrowed brow tightened. Understanding the situation was one thing, but knowing exactly how to handle it was another. Perhaps because this matter was genuinely distressing him, Lin Guanqing, who initially had no solution in mind, hesitated briefly before feeling a sudden urge to confide in someone.
He slumped down onto the bench, speaking in a muffled, sullen tone, “Then what else can I do? Things have already reached this point; are you expecting me to lower my head and apologize directly? That would be far too shameful!”
Shen Xiu gently shook her head, as if she disagreed with his statement, “How could that possibly be a shameful thing?”
“To make concessions for the woman you love, and to be willing to lower your pride for Miss Meng’s sake simply to bring her happiness, in my eyes, that is clearly a commendable act.”
Shen Xiu looked at him gently, “Could it be that in the Young Master’s heart, Miss Meng’s position is worth less than your own pride?”
“I believe the Young Master already has the answer in his heart. You merely assumed that, given Miss Meng’s tolerance, these matters would eventually blow over, and therefore did not view them as a big deal.”
Lin Guanqing opened his mouth to refute her, unwilling to let her think he lacked a sense of responsibility, “How could I think like that? I simply felt she might not listen to me.” He said with a hint of awkwardness.
Shen Xiu smiled, though a trace of disagreement surfaced on her face, “In truth, the Young Master does not need to harbor so many reservations. Although I have not spent a very long time in Miss Meng’s company, I can still tell that she is a very reasonable person.”
“Moreover, Miss Meng cares deeply about the Young Master, otherwise she would not constantly keep track of who you interact with.” Pausing for a brief moment, she continued, “If the Young Master patiently explains everything clearly to her, I believe Miss Meng will forgive you.”
Smiling as she looked at Lin Guanqing across from her, Shen Xiu stopped speaking after delivering these words.
Lin Guanqing experienced a rare moment of awkwardness. He struggled internally for a good while before finally saying, “Fine, alright, I admit that what you said is quite correct.”
“However, I truly find it difficult to lower my face and apologize. But can you truly guarantee that as long as I go and apologize, Senior Sister will forgive me?” Lin Guanqing stared intently at Shen Xiu, as though he needed a definitive confirmation from her to set his mind at ease.
Shen Xiu found this somewhat amusing. Instead of giving a direct answer to his question, she simply returned his gaze with gentleness and patience.
“What does the Young Master think?”
Faced with such a gaze, Lin Guanqing inexplicably began to feel rather uneasy.
It was as if he had only just realized he had asked a foolish question, and a flush crept up his face.
Consequently, instinctively looking away, he shifted his gaze elsewhere, avoiding direct eye contact with her.
Once he had managed to collect all his emotions, a genuine, heartfelt smile finally appeared on Lin Guanqing’s face, as though some heavy burden in his heart had suddenly been lifted.
Only then did another question occur to him. Feeling a twinge of doubt, he turned his head back toward Shen Xiu, hesitated awkwardly for a moment, and then asked with mild embarrassment, “Oh, right, well, I still do not know why you chose to help me?”
Lin Guanqing looked at her closely, studying that distinct face with earnest attention, as though seeing her for the very first time.
Perhaps not anticipating that he would examine her with such direct and probing scrutiny, Shen Xiu’s expression flickered in brief surprise.
Yet this reaction lingered on her face for only a fleeting moment before she swiftly composed herself, a gentle smile slowly blooming across her features.
“The Young Master rescued me from the hands of the slave traders, which makes you my savior. I have no other way to repay the Young Master, so I merely hope the Young Master can live a happier life.”
As she spoke of this, she seemed to recall some unpleasant memory, falling silent for a brief moment as the expression on her face grew somewhat dejected, “To the Young Master, it was merely a trivial matter, but to me, it is a kindness that spans a lifetime.”
Lin Guanqing had certainly not anticipated such a reason, and a wave of embarrassment washed over him.
A moment ago, he had actually been wondering if she had some ulterior motive or needed a favor from him. To think she was merely trying to repay a kindness made him realize he had overcomplicated the situation, and his expression grew even more awkward.
He recalled the day at the alley entrance when this young woman had been chased by several rough-looking men, running in panic right into his arms. Upon seeing those fellows holding hemp ropes and looking thoroughly disreputable, he had simply stepped in and dealt with them along the way.
Thinking back on it now, that hardly counted as saving a life; it was merely lending a casual hand. After all, when wandering through the martial world, encountering injustice naturally called for drawing one’s sword to help.
He was actually quite curious as to why those men had been pursuing her. However, seeing her reluctant to bring it up, he knew it could not possibly be anything pleasant. Perhaps she had some unspeakable hardship, or perhaps she had been targeted by human traffickers?
The more Lin Guanqing pondered, the more logical his own analysis felt, prompting him to drop the inquiry about her past.
After all, for such a frail young woman who lacked martial arts skills and wandered alone outside, any circumstances would seem exceptionally unusual.
Contemplating for a moment and wishing to offer help, he asked again, “Then is there anything you need my help with?”
Shen Xiu blinked in bewilderment, looking at him with a perplexed expression, seemingly caught off guard by the abrupt shift of topic back to herself.
“Help?” She voiced her mild surprise.
“Indeed.” Seeing that she had failed to grasp his meaning, Lin Guanqing scratched his head and said with a trace of embarrassment, “My meaning is that since you helped me with such a significant matter, is there anything you desire? Oh, right, if you wish to return home, I can also arrange for an escort to take you back.”
At the mention of home, Shen Xiu tightened her fingers into a fist for a split second. Remaining silent for a moment, she shook her head and said, “There is no need; I do not have a home.”
Hearing this, a slight awkwardness crossed Lin Guanqing’s face once more. He had not expected this person to be entirely destitute of a home.
This truly was poking someone right in an old wound.
“Ah, my apologies. I did not intentionally bring up your painful memories, nor did I know you had nowhere to go.” He finished speaking, glanced sideways at her, and realized she was not looking at him.
The surrounding air seemed to grow utterly still.
Lin Guanqing felt even more awkward; what a truly headache-inducing situation! He really did not enjoy interacting with such delicate, fragile young girls.
He tapped his forehead, pondering for quite some time before finally coming up with a suitable pretext, “Otherwise, well then, is there anything at all that you want? Consider it my token of appreciation for coming to talk sense into me, otherwise Senior Sister and I would undoubtedly have ended up quarreling even worse!”
“Just name it. We people from the Bingshui Sect have always repaid every kindness and settled every grievance. As long as it is within my power, I will do my utmost to fulfill it for you.” He patted his chest in a gesture of absolute assurance.
Understanding that he simply wished to avoid owing her any favors or entanglements, Shen Xiu offered a faint smile, “The Young Master truly need not be so polite with me. I did not really do anything.”
Before she could finish her sentence, however, she noticed Lin Guanqing frowning in displeasure, clearly detesting the feeling of owing someone a debt of gratitude. Pausing for a short beat, she added:
“If the Young Master does not mind…”
Tilt-headed in thought, Shen Xiu’s gaze drifted toward several martial arts manuals resting upon his desk, a flicker of hesitation crossing her eyes, “Would you be willing to teach me some self-defense techniques?”