With only a single stick of incense’s time remaining before 10:00 PM, Lin Chongtan finally returned. Seeing me already in his room, his usually calm face wavered slightly, but he quickly regained his usual composure. He asked me to wait a moment longer, as he needed to change his clothes.
Looking at him, I felt he was acting out of a guilty conscience. I took a few steps forward, and suddenly, my nose caught a strange scent. I sniffed hard. The smell faded as Lin Chongtan moved toward the washroom. Realizing the scent was coming from him, I grabbed his sleeve and leaned in to smell.
I wasn’t wrong; Lin Chongtan smelled of alcohol, though it wasn’t strong.
“You actually drank!” I felt I had caught him red-handed. The Imperial Academy does not allow students to drink alcohol except on holidays.
Lin Chongtan looked down at the sleeve I was holding. With a light lift of his arm, the smooth fabric escaped my palm. “Mhm.”
He admitted to drinking, then added, “There is a copybook of the Yanta Shengjiao Xu on the table. Go take a look.”
I knew he was trying to avoid talking about the drinking, but the more he acted this way, the less I wanted to let it go. By the time he finished changing and came out of the washroom, I hadn’t looked at the copybook at all; my eyes were fixed on him.
“If you don’t tell me why you went drinking, I’ll write a letter and tell Father,” I warned him.
Lin Chongtan walked to the table and sat down. Still ignoring the matter of the alcohol, he picked up the copybook and placed it in front of me. “Have you looked at it?”
I glanced at it and turned away. “I looked.”
Why did he always make me look at the Yanta Shengjiao Xu copybook? I had practiced it long ago.
Lin Chongtan seemed to read my mind. “When you were at home, your teacher wanted Father to see the results of your studies as soon as possible, so he didn’t let you build a solid foundation. Without a solid foundation, the further you study, the more dangerous it becomes. I have looked closely at your handwriting; it is too scattered and lacks form. Also, you started practicing running script before you even mastered regular script. You are being too impulsive.”
Being criticized so suddenly, I dazed for a moment. Then I realized Lin Chongtan was trying to change the subject, or perhaps he wanted to strike first by complaining to Father that I wasn’t serious about my studies.
“You…” I get tongue-tied easily when I’m angry. It took me a long while to catch my breath. “We are talking about you drinking right now. Who told you to bring up my handwriting?”
The spring night was quiet; there wasn’t even the sound of insects yet. Lin Chongtan’s gaze moved from the copybook to my face. Seeing my persistence on the matter, he finally began to talk about his drinking.
“I did have two cups tonight. I hope Xiao Di won’t tell anyone.”
Our eyes met, and I thought of the key point. “The Imperial Academy doesn’t allow students to drink, and certainly doesn’t allow alcohol to be brought inside. You definitely weren’t drinking alone tonight. Who were you drinking with?”
But Lin Chongtan refused to say. No matter how I threatened him, we ended things on a bad note. On the way back, I clutched the Yanta Shengjiao Xu copybook, kicking pebbles as I walked, wondering who on earth Lin Chongtan went drinking with.
Even though Lin Chongtan and I were both new students, he was clearly different from me. He was just a hateful peacock.
As I neared my own dormitory, a person suddenly rushed out from the shadows, scaring me so much I jumped back several steps.
Once I saw the person’s face, I wished I had run into a ghost instead.
The person who jumped out was the boy in silk robes who lived next door to me. This boy had a significant background; he was the young prince of the Yun Estate, named Feiguang Yue.
Feiguang Yue shared the dormitory area with me. I didn’t think I had offended him, but his attitude toward me was very strange. He either spoke with sarcasm or just kept staring at me. This time, he looked me up and down. “Where are you coming from?”
I glanced toward my room. Was Liangji secretly reading storybooks again? Why hadn’t he come to look for me?
Seeing that I didn’t answer immediately, Feiguang Yue’s expression turned dark, but after a few breaths, he leaned in close. “Why aren’t you speaking? Are you a mute?”
“I am not,” I argued.
“Oh, so you aren’t. I see you keeping your mouth shut all day; I thought you were a mute.” Feiguang Yue took another step closer. I felt he was too close and couldn’t help but step back. I didn’t know why my backing away provoked him again, but he grabbed my arm. “What are you hiding for?! It’s not like I’m going to eat you. By the way, Lin Chun Di, I sent my servant to get some milk today, and the people in the kitchen actually said they were out.”
Since I joined the Lin family, the monthly allowance Father put in my account was quite large. It was even more than what many of the noble sons at the Academy received. Everything at the Academy cost money—for example, the milk. I was used to bathing in milk, but each student could only get one free jar a day, which wasn’t nearly enough. So, I spent a large sum of money to specifically order milk from the kitchen.
The kitchen, having taken the money, would buy extra milk from outside and send someone to deliver it to my room every night.
Since it was a special order, it shouldn’t be the case that I bought all the milk and left none for others.
“Later, I asked around and found out that someone at the Academy actually uses milk to bathe.” As Feiguang Yue spoke, my face turned pale. “Good grief, even the women in my family don’t use milk to bathe. Why would a man at the Academy use milk for a bath? There is a very famous play in the capital lately called The Woman General. Lin Chun Di, have you heard of it?”
My body went stiff and I shook my head, not understanding why he suddenly changed the subject to a play.
Seeing me shake my head, a mischievous smile appeared on Feiguang Yue’s face. “It’s fine, I’ll tell you briefly. The Woman General is about a woman who dresses as a man to join the army. She eats and sleeps with the men, fights the enemy, and finally becomes a great general. Do you think there might be a woman who wants to be a high official, so she dresses as a man and sneaks into the Imperial Academy?”
I felt his expression was getting stranger and stranger. I didn’t want to talk to him anymore and made an excuse: “I don’t know. It’s late, and I haven’t memorized my essay yet. Prince Yue, you should rest early too.”
I had only taken one step when a pair of hands clamped tightly around my waist.
“What’s the rush? I’m not finished talking to you. Lin Chun Di, just admit it. I know everything—the one bathing in milk is you. You bathe in milk every day; are you really a girl?”
His voice was low for the last sentence, as if he were whispering on purpose, and his lips were right against my ear.
Breathed upon by Feiguang Yue, I was both ashamed and angry. “I… I am not!”
“Not what? I think you are. Looking like this—” he gave an ambiguous chuckle. “I heard you are a child of a distant branch of the Suzhou Lin family. The Lin family put so much effort into sending you here; it’s strange no matter how you look at it. Why be so good to a child from a distant branch? I think you are a daughter of the Lin family. Because you were jealous of your brother entering the Academy, you wiped off your makeup and followed him? To hide your identity as a girl, you told everyone you were from a distant branch. Don’t move; let me see if you really are a girl.”
His hands suddenly began to grope around. In my struggle, the copybook fell to the ground. I didn’t understand why he was saying such ridiculous things. Isn’t it obvious at a glance whether I am a man or a woman?
“I am not a woman!” I pulled his hands away. “I’m going back to study. You… you stop doing such strange things.”
Feiguang Yue grabbed my arm again. “For an idiot like you, it’s useless no matter how much you study. You might as well…” He stopped, thinking of something. I only felt completely insulted. My head grew hot, and I forgot Father’s warning not to offend these noble sons of the capital.
I grabbed the hand he had held in front of me and bit down hard. When he let go in pain, I quickly bent over to grab the copybook on the ground and ran, shouting Liangji’s name as I went.
Liangji was startled by my voice and came out of the room. “Young Master Chun, you’re back?”
I ran in a panic, not even daring to look back at Feiguang Yue. Seeing Liangji come out, I grabbed his arm and hurriedly pulled him into the room. “Quick, close the door!”
Liangji was confused but did as I said. “Young Master Chun, did you see a ghost? Why is your face so pale?”
I didn’t answer him. I ran to the table in a panic, saw the teapot, and poured a cup.
“Young Master Chun, the tea is cold. Wait for me to change it…”
Before Liangji could finish, I had already gulped down the cold tea. Feiguang Yue was not a good person; he often bullied people in private, whether it was his servant or the students sharing the dorms. A few days ago, a student was slapped in the face by Feiguang Yue.
That student was hit but turned around and apologized to Feiguang Yue. I bit Feiguang Yue; would he retaliate against me?
The more I thought about it, the more scared I became. I had no heart for studying at all. The next morning, I changed my habit of going to the classroom early. I only walked into the classroom just as the instructor was about to arrive.
As soon as I entered, I saw Feiguang Yue sitting in my seat. He saw me and sneered. Just as he was about to say something, the instructor walked in from outside. He glanced at the instructor and stood up slowly.
I quickly moved in the other direction, trying to sit in my own seat.
But a leg suddenly shot out from the side. I couldn’t dodge in time and was tripped by that leg, falling hard onto the ground.
“Lin Chun Di, what’s wrong? Why are you falling while walking?” The instructor’s inquiry came from above.
I sat up, clutching my arm, wanting to say someone intentionally tripped me. Before I could speak, I met the eyes of the person who had tripped me.
The person who tripped me was named Wenle Nie. His father was a high-ranking official, and he was Feiguang Yue’s lackey, always following his lead. Seeing Wenle Nie’s expression, I realized he had done it on purpose.
Father told me to study hard at the Academy. If I got into arguments with these people, Father would definitely be angry. Thinking of this, I gritted my teeth, endured the pain, and climbed up from the floor to sit in my seat. I would just endure a bit longer; once Feiguang Yue’s anger faded, he would surely let me be.
However, Feiguang Yue’s bullying grew more excessive by the day. It started with having people trip me, adding ink to my teacup, and intentionally ruining my paintings. Today, during a break, he actually had people drag me into the rock garden.
“What… what do you want to do?” I was forced back step by step. I wanted to get out, but Feiguang Yue’s people blocked the entrance of the rock garden completely.
Feiguang Yue didn’t speak; he just tilted his head and looked at me. My hands clenched under my sleeves. I brought up the instructor to warn them: “Class is starting soon. If the instructor doesn’t see me, he will definitely ask. When that happens… I will tell him!”
I don’t know what I said wrong, but they all laughed when they heard my words. Feiguang Yue laughed the loudest, looking at me as if I were a fool. “Look at this idiot, he actually thinks those instructors can save him.”