Suddenly, the Stoic Samurai gasped. Her blank face cracked, a wave of sheer panic washing over her features.
"Oh no! I... I am going to be late! Mom and Dad will be absolutely furious..."
Without another word, she bolted down the street, moving at a terrifying, superhuman speed that kicked up a cloud of dust in her wake.
The Maniacal Girl watched her go, shrugged indifferently, and rested her rocket launcher over her shoulder.
"Meh. I'm bored anyway. I'm gonna go home, play some video games... maybe take a nap."
She turned on her heel and casually sauntered away into the ruins.
Smiling Girl's grin stretched taut, nervous sweat forming on her forehead.
"I should... probably go too! Hehehe... Bye! Nice to meet you, Cupcake! I really, really hope you find whoever this Alice person is! Bye-byyyye!"
Desperate to escape the unhinged pink stalker, she swung her massive axe forward, literally chopping a neat, person-sized hole directly through the brick wall of a nearby building.
She leaped through the opening like a cartoon character escaping a frame and completely vanished into the shadows.
Tony stood frozen, staring at the empty alleyway in utter bewilderment.
"Wha... what just happened?!"
He looked around for validation, but Hopeless Girl was still crying miserably into her hands, completely oblivious to the chaos.
Grey Girl didn't care either.
She simply let out a heavy sigh, pushed herself off the pavement, and began a slow, sluggish trek toward her own house.
"Can't even get a good nap with all this drama," Grey Girl muttered.
She disappeared around the corner.
Left alone with the weeping magical girl, Tony's pink frills softened.
He walked over and knelt in front of her.
"Hey..."
Hopeless Girl peeked out from behind her hands.
"Do you need someone to walk you home?"
Her red, puffy eyes widened.
She let out a pathetic little squeak.
Then slowly nodded.
Tony gave her a gentle smile.
"Come on."
He held out his hand.
"Let's get out of here."
The hopeless teacher stared at his hand for a moment.
Then, with trembling fingers, she took it.
As they walked away from the ruined intersection, her crying gradually subsided.
She kept her gaze fixed on the ground.
And then...
A faint shimmer washed over her body.
The frilly, dark-green magical dress dissolved into a pair of blue jeans and a plain T-shirt.
Her wild, untamed hair settled into a neat, professional style.
Tony stopped dead in his tracks.
His jaw dropped.
Standing beside him was Miss Marcy.
His homeroom teacher.
The woman who was famously composed, strict, and perfectly polite.
Miss Marcy blinked.
Then immediately straightened her posture.
"Ahem."
She smoothed down her shirt.
Her expression became calm.
Professional.
Collected.
It was like watching someone put on a suit of armor.
But Tony noticed something.
Her fingers were trembling.
Ever so slightly.
Her smile was perfect.
Her eyes weren't.
There was still fear there.
Exhaustion.
Embarrassment.
Somehow...
That terrified Tony more than the aliens did.
Miss Marcy cleared her throat again.
"Thank you for helping me through that..."
She paused.
"...deeply horrifying experience."
Her voice was steady.
Almost too steady.
"I certainly hope we meet under better terms next time."
Tony just stared.
The woman who had spent the last hour:
crying,
hiding behind dumpsters,
calling herself worthless,
and accidentally leveling city blocks...
was somehow standing here acting like she was hosting parent-teacher conferences.
It was surreal.
Then Miss Marcy tilted her head.
"What is your name?"
She looked him up and down.
"Are you... one of my students?"
Tony's soul immediately left his body.
His eyes darted wildly to the left.
Sweat poured down his forehead.
He cleared his throat.
"Uh!"
"My name is..."
He panicked.
"...Toni!"
He raised one finger proudly.
"With an I!"
Miss Marcy blinked.
"And..."
Tony continued, sweating profusely.
"I am definitely..."
"One-hundred percent..."
"Absolutely not..."
"One of your students."
Silence.
Miss Marcy stared at him.
Tony smiled nervously.
Miss Marcy stared harder.
Tony could practically hear the gears turning in her teacher brain.
The backpack.
The shoes.
The voice.
The terrible lie.
Finally...
She let out a soft sigh.
"So..."
Tony winced.
"...you are one of my students."
"I'M NOT!"
"You changed one letter in your name."
"It was a tactical decision!"
"It was an awful tactical decision."
Tony crossed his arms defensively.
"You're making assumptions!"
Miss Marcy pointed at him.
"You have Tony's backpack."
Tony looked over his shoulder.
"...Crap."
"You have Tony's shoes."
Tony looked down.
"...Double crap."
"And," Miss Marcy continued, narrowing her eyes.
"I graded your math test yesterday."
Tony froze.
Miss Marcy raised an eyebrow.
"You got a B."
Tony gasped.
"I STUDIED SO HARD FOR THAT!"
The words escaped his mouth before he could stop them.
Silence.
Miss Marcy stared.
Tony stared.
Realization slowly dawned on both of them.
Tony covered his mouth.
Miss Marcy pinched the bridge of her nose.
"...Tony."
Tony whimpered.
"My disguise was flawless."
"It was catastrophically bad."
"...Toni with an I was pretty clever though."
"It really wasn't."
Tony lowered his head in defeat.
Miss Marcy looked around at the ruined street.
The alien slime.
The smoking craters.
The shattered buildings.
Then she looked back at him.
For the first time all day...
her professional smile softened.
"Please..."
Her trembling fingers tightened around her own arm.
"Let's just keep this between us."