The beautiful girl knight everyone has been waiting for finally makes her entrance! (Note: Osamu corrected the heights for Rei and Manami on 260223.)
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”We have an audience with Your Majesty regarding the Hero party, so we’ll be taking our leave now,” Günther said. “As for the rest of your orientation, a knight will be assigned to each party. Just wait here a moment.”
With that, Günther led the Hero party out of the room. Martina followed them out, and Yuko trailed along after Martina. Damn, what a letdown. I wanted to stare at Martina just a little bit longer.
Since there was a bit of time before our guides arrived, I figured I’d introduce the members of the other parties.
〈The JK Party〉
[Ice Mage] Rin
. About 175cm. A bit on the large side. Long, shaggy hair. Her “chest armor” is incredibly thick.
. She’s the silent type, but her presence is overwhelming.
[Instant Swordswoman] Hina
. About 160cm and muscular. Sports a charming ponytail. Chest armor is on the thinner side.
. She seems like the honest, serious type.
[Stealth] Nanami
. About 165cm and fairly slender. Short hair. Chest armor is decent enough.
. She has a relaxed way of speaking. Seems like she’s got a bit of a quirky personality.
[Saint] Mizuki
. About 165cm with a standard build. Long hair. Chest armor is somewhat thick.
. Her speech is extremely polite.
[Destroyer] Sakura
. About 160cm and slender. Short hair. Thin chest armor.
. Total yankee vibes.
. The main attraction of that two-timing Osamu mess.
〈The Working Women Party〉
[Magic-Clad] Rei
. About 155cm with a standard build. Twintails. Thick chest armor.
. High energy and seems bright.
[Alchemist] Mizobe Aya
. About 165cm and slender. Long hair. Zero chest armor.
. Looks dead serious. I can practically feel the “hard-worker” aura radiating off her.
[Priest] Misaki
. About 165cm with a standard build. Semi-long hair. Chest armor is very thick.
. She gives off that “calm and kind older sister” vibe.
[Tamer] Manami
. About 170cm and slender. Short hair. Thin chest armor.
. Sharp, almond-shaped eyes.
. A very composed way of speaking.
[War Saint] Mai
. About 175cm with a toned, athletic build. Hair tied back in a single ponytail. Chest armor is very thick.
. A bit masculine; she speaks in a very brisk, clear-cut manner.
[Bow Saint] Yumiko
. About 155cm and petite. Medium-length hair. Thin chest armor.
. Comes across as polite and reserved.
. Also, she’s Osamu’s ex-wife.
Think I’m being a bit too thorough with the “chest armor” checks? Well, duh. Don’t underestimate the libido of a Ten Thousand Onanism Master.
By the way, here’s the deal with Yuko:
[Civil Servant] Yuko
. About 160cm with a standard build. Hair in a half-up style. Thin chest armor.
. Speaks politely enough, but her motivation is basically non-existent.
”Oh, good. They’re all still here,” a voice said.
”Excuse us,” another added.
”Think there are any hot guys in this batch?” a third asked.
It looked like our guides had arrived. One of them was saying something pretty out there, but I decided to ignore it for now. All three were decked out in metal plate; these had to be the knights Günther-san mentioned.
The one in the lead was a female knight with a purple wolf-cut. She had the aura of someone genuinely powerful. Maybe in her thirties? The second was a male knight with short red hair who looked like the serious type. Probably in his twenties. The last one was a female knight with brown, semi-long hair. A total problem child. Honestly, she just looked like a complete airhead.
”I’m Emily, your lead guide,” the lead knight said. “These two are Adalgar and Mercedes. They’ll also be assisting.”
”I’m Adalgar,” the man said. “Pleased to meet you.”
”I’m Mercedes! Wait, an all-male party?” the airhead shouted. “Captain! Please, please let me handle this group!”
”Shut it, Mel!” Emily barked.
WHAM!
”Gwah-h!” Mercedes cried out.
We weren’t even thirty seconds into their introduction and she’d already taken a full-force punch to the head… Is this girl actually going to be okay?
”Sigh… sorry about that,” Emily said, rubbing her temples. “Believe it or not, she’s actually quite capable. Her level is the highest among the recruits. So, what do you think? Are you okay with her handling the men’s party? Personally, I think it’s better to have a guide who’s actually motivated.”
Mercedes clutched her throbbing head, looking at us with pleading, expectant eyes. I glanced around at the rest of the guys, but nobody seemed to have an objection. Kenta-kun just gave a strained, wry smile.
”Well, having someone enthusiastic is definitely a plus for us,” I said. “We’ll leave our guidance to Mercedes-san.”
”YESSSSSS!” Mercedes screamed, jumping for joy.
Wait, is the Knight Order really that starved for romance? Günther-san was a total silver fox, and Adalgar-kun over there is a tall, handsome guy. I’ll have to ask her about that later.
”Thanks for being flexible,” Captain Emily said. “Alright, I’ll take the JKs, and Adalgar, you handle that group over there.”
”Sir! Understood,” Adalgar replied.
It looked like Captain Emily was taking the JK party, while Adalgar-kun handled the working women.
”From here on out, we’re moving by party,” Emily announced. “We’ve got a lot to cover: a tour of the city, registering at the Adventurer’s Guild, arranging lodgings, and procuring gear and items. So move it!”
We were starting a brand-new life here, and being an adventurer is a job where you can die any day. It was probably best to just follow Captain Emily’s advice.
”Members of the men’s party! I am your guide, Mercedes!”
Yeah, we know. You were definitely the one who stood out the most.
”Who’s the party leader?” Mercedes asked. “Oh! Leader, tell me your name, your Class, and your type! What kind of women are you into?”
Whoa, okay. Talk about zero to sixty. We aren’t at a mixer; isn’t she skipping a few steps here?
”I’m the leader, and the party name is ‘The Leemans’,” I said. “My name is Daisuke, and my Class is Onanist. As for my type… do I really have to answer that?”
”Yes! Absolutely!” Mercedes insisted.
”Sigh… fine. My type is a woman with a ‘gap’ in her personality,” Daisuke replied.
”A gap? Like what?” Mercedes asked, tilting her head.
”You know, like a girl who acts cool but secretly loves cute things. Or someone who’s usually prickly but gets all clingy and sweet when we’re alone.”
”I see… as someone who is perpetually refined and lovely, that’s a difficult attribute for me to grasp,” Mercedes said. “But ‘Onanist’ is such a strange Class. I’ve never heard of it. What kind of innate skills do you have?”
”Well, I can get 1 experience point a day just by jacking it, and I can remember scenery with perfect clarity,” I explained. “The downside is it makes me a lot less popular with women.”
”Ah, I see. That explains why I haven’t felt a single spark of attraction since we met,” Mercedes said bluntly. “I’m sorry, but I can’t date you!”
”Hey! Who said anything about wanting to date you!?” I shouted.
Dammit! My inner thoughts leaked out. Oh well, whatever. She’s an airhead anyway.
”I guess I’m next,” Kenta said. “My name is Kenta, and my Class is Magic Swordsman. My type is someone calm and composed.”
It looked like Kenta-kun had already mastered the art of ignoring her nonsense. With everything happening at once, I couldn’t blame him.
”Someone calm… why, that’s exactly like me!” Mercedes exclaimed. “Please, Kenta, go out with this Mercedes!”
”Yeah, no thanks,” Kenta replied flatly.
”Why not!?” Mercedes cried.
She was so naturally ridiculous I couldn’t help but jump in.
”Haha… maybe we should just start as friends,” Kenta said, offering a strained laugh and a gentle rejection. Totally understandable.
”Next is me-degozaru,” Takuya said. “The name is Takuya, Class is Ninja-degozaru. My type is a yandere-degozaru.”
Damn, Takuya. You really went for the deep end with that one.
”Y-Yandere…? Okay, that’s definitely not me,” Mercedes muttered, looking a bit deflated. “Well, there are still two more! I still have a chance! Next person, please!”
Mercedes: Retreating!
”I am Makoto. My Class is Blacksmith-gozaru,” Makoto announced. “My type is a beautiful young girl-nasu.”
”Oh! Then that must be me! Mercedes!” she shouted, perking up again.
I really wanted to shut her down, but to be fair, she was a beautiful girl. At least on the outside.
”You’re completely wrong-degozaru,” Makoto said coldly. “My strike zone is strictly ten to twelve years old. I have zero interest in an old hag like you, Mercedes-shi.”
And there it was. Makoto: officially outed as a hardcore lolicon.
”Whaaat!? Even though I’m overflowing with feminine charm?” Mercedes wailed. “I… I guess I have to retreat here too. N-next! Next person, please!”
Mercedes: Retreating again after Takuya and Makoto!
By the way, Mercedes’s “chest armor”–the biological kind–was actually on the thicker side.
”I’m Kazuya, Fantasy Summoner-ssu,” Kazuya said lazily. “My type is 2D girls-ssu.”
”……”
Takuya, Makoto, and now Kazuya. Even Mercedes was finally speechless.
”W-well, let’s just pull ourselves together and get going,” I said.
”The only one who needs to pull themselves together is Mercedes,” Kenta muttered.
”Quiet, you!” Mercedes snapped. “Let’s go, Daisuke-san!”
”Yeah, yeah,” I replied.
By the way, I asked her about it a few days later.
”Commander Günther already has three wives,” she told me, “and Adalgar-san is so head-over-heels for his wife that there’s no room for anyone else. Besides, the Knight Order is full of noble kids. A commoner like me doesn’t exactly get a lot of great marriage proposals anyway.”
…So she said.
I never said her personality was cute. But I guess this kind of thing has its own charm.
Summary:
Daisuke introduces the remaining members of the JK and Working Women parties with a specific focus on their physical attributes. Three knights arrive to guide the parties, with the eccentric Mercedes assigned to Daisuke’s group of salarymen. Mercedes immediately attempts to find a boyfriend among the group but is rejected by everyone due to their extreme personal preferences.
Trivia:
- Osamu corrected heights for Rei and Manami.
- Yumiko is the protagonist’s (Osamu/Daisuke’s) ex-wife.
- The ‘Onanist’ class comes with a social penalty (harder to be liked by women).
- Mercedes is the highest level among the young knights despite her personality.
- The Knight Order is mostly comprised of nobles, making it hard for commoners like Mercedes to find matches
Character Insight:
Mercedes shows a desperate motivation to find a partner to escape her social standing or lack of options, while the salarymen show they have brought their modern-world ‘otaku’ niches (ninjas, lolicons, 2D-only) into this fantasy world.
Behind the Scenes:
The author uses ‘Chest Armor’ as a recurring gag for breast size rankings, standard for this specific genre of web novel.
TL Notes:
1 ↩ Chest Armor: A slang term used by the narrator to rank breast size.
2 ↩ Onanism Master: Reference to the protagonist’s unique and crude class.
3 ↩ The Leemans: A pun on ‘Salarymen’.
4 ↩ Onanist: A class that gains experience through self-gratification.