Most of it was complaints about life in the Imperial Palace. Shitty superiors, seniority bullying, wages… and the Emperor.
“His Majesty seems to have been getting angrier lately.”
“So I’m not the only one who noticed? Yeah. It feels like we’re walking on thin ice.”
Jedrier pricked up his ears. To think he would hear about the Emperor’s movements in a place like this. He couldn’t afford to miss even a speck of information as tiny as dust.
“Before, at least we could breathe… but not anymore. I’m terrified.”
“Me too.”
Just what had the Emperor done for people to say they were frightened even to breathe? Jedrier gulped. Goosebumps rose along his arms.
“Still, lately he’s been away quite a lot…. At least we can breathe when he’s gone.”
Wait.
The Emperor had been leaving his seat?
Could it be… that he was roaming around the Imperial Palace looking for people worth killing? Or maybe he was searching for excuses to pick a fight. Henry had said he had permission to chop firewood, but the Emperor was more than capable of revoking that permission whenever he pleased. Apparently, he had been getting angrier lately and was in a foul mood, so it was entirely plausible.
Especially when the person in question was a cold-blooded Emperor with neither blood nor tears.
“I heard he even flipped over a table during a meeting recently?”
The servants’ voices gradually faded into the distance.
Jedrier sat there blankly before lowering his head in gloom. Self-reproach washed over him.
Ah.
Even though I knew what fate awaited me, I’ve been looking away from it.
Because the time I spent with Henry was so happy.
He shouldn’t have done that.
If the Emperor was in such a bad mood, then bloodshed would soon follow.
And when that bloodshed came….
Henry would get dragged into it because of him.
How could he have tried to ignore that?
Thinking of all the things Henry had done for him, he never should have.
‘Right.’
Jedrier made up his mind.
It was time to let Henry go.
It was time to send the child away without delay.
He couldn’t be greedy anymore.
Doing so would be something no decent person should do.
“Jeri.”
That was why Jedrier could only smile at Henry as he approached with a bright expression.
There weren’t many days left when he would be able to smile at the child like this.
“Have you been waiting long?”
“Nooo…. I was just looking around.”
Jedrier rolled his eyes and patted the empty space beside him a few times.
Henry paused briefly before sitting down.
Thinking about how the two of them were sitting alone in a place where lovers secretly met inside the Imperial Palace made Jedrier feel a little awkward.
“I have something I want to ask.”
“What is it?”
“Can I ask why you came to the Imperial Palace?”
“…….”
Was that too difficult a question?
Jedrier wanted to know why Henry could be disliked, even framed, and thrown into this shabby palace without showing the slightest sign of resentment.
After hesitating for a long while, Henry quietly continued.
“At the time, I had no choice.”
The winter wind blew through Henry’s hair.
For some reason, the sight made him look precarious, as though he might disappear at any moment.
“I had to choose between dying and coming here. Those were my only two options.”
Henry spoke calmly, but what his words contained was anything but calm.
How hard must it have been for him all this time?
Unable to pour out the resentment inside him, he must have swallowed it again and again.
Jedrier couldn’t even imagine how painful that time must have been.
“That must have been hard.”
“…It was not particularly difficult.”
What made Jedrier feel even worse was that Henry sounded sincere.
That was why he couldn’t carelessly try to comfort him.
“What about you, Jeri?”
“…Me?”
Jedrier blinked.
Honestly, he didn’t really know.
When he had opened his eyes, he had already been inside the Imperial Palace.
‘What must he have felt?’
He had been abused and tormented by people Jedrier didn’t even want to call family, so perhaps the original Jedrier had felt relieved.
Or maybe he had simply given up.
“Still, I’m glad I came to the Imperial Palace.”
“Why do you think so?”
“Because….”
Jedrier didn’t know whether the original Jedrier had wanted to enter the Imperial Palace or had hated the idea.
Those memories simply didn’t exist.
So he decided to say the one thing he could answer with confidence right now.
“Because I met you, Henry.”
He lifted the corners of his lips into a smile.
Henry’s face, looking back at him, held a strange, unsettled expression.
Then, all of a sudden, Henry leaned down and whispered.
“Shall we go inside the greenhouse?”
“Huh?”
“It is under construction, so no one should be there.”
“N-nooo.”
Jedrier quickly grabbed Henry’s arm and pulled him back.
Even if it was under construction, if they carelessly went inside and someone saw them, it would be a disaster!
He also didn’t forget to stretch his neck out and glance around in case anyone had overheard them.
“You’ll get in trouble if you say things like that so carelessly.”
“Because even the floors of the Imperial Palace have ears?”
He knows that perfectly well, so why is he acting like this!
Jedrier firmly held Henry’s hand as Henry smiled brightly, and the two left the area.
* * *
The day began no differently from any other.
It was peaceful and monotonous.
But Jedrier couldn’t enjoy that peace and instead let out a deep sigh.
He was simply frightened, as though he were walking across ice that could crack at any moment.
Because of what he had heard last night, he hadn’t been able to sleep properly.
Normally, whenever Henry was by his side, Jedrier would drift off before he even realized it, but last night had been different.
He couldn’t believe that his days with Henry had been so peaceful and comfortable that he had completely forgotten his own fate.
No.
He hadn’t forgotten.
He had simply been looking away from it because he hated the fact that if they separated like this, he would never see Henry again for the rest of his life.
‘I need to run away quickly.’
The fact that the Emperor’s mood seemed unusual meant that he could explode at any moment.
It meant that the Emperor could lose his mind right now, grab a sword, and storm into the little nest Henry and Jedrier shared.
And if that happened, Henry would definitely get dragged into it too.
‘Of course he would.’
Even if Jedrier shoved him in the back and told him to run, Henry would stay.
Because their child was just that kind of person.
He would undoubtedly step in front of a flying blade to protect Jedrier.
Knowing full well what sort of horrific situation could be coming, Jedrier couldn’t let Henry continue staying in such a dangerous place.
He needed to send him back to where he had originally been as soon as possible.
‘First, I’ll send Henry back….’
If Jedrier disappeared immediately afterward, it would look suspicious, so he could leave after letting some time pass.
It was okay.
Everything would be okay.
Jedrier tried to calm his heart, which was pounding wildly with anxiety.
This was something he should have done a long time ago.
He had been greedy.
The one who had kept putting it off day after day was no one but himself.
So he needed to do it now.
‘Henry said the place he originally belonged to was the Knights, right?’
He would go to that person and tell him about Henry.
He would explain just how kind, gentle, attentive, and considerate Henry was.
That Henry had only been misunderstood.
If Jedrier spoke slowly and sincerely, surely the man would listen.
Jedrier was grateful that the Commander of the Knights was inside the palace.
He was someone Jedrier could meet if he simply made up his mind to do so.
“Right. I’m going to do it!”
For Henry!
And today was the perfect opportunity.
Henry had gone away again.
So if Jedrier secretly went out now, no one would notice.
Taking a deep breath, Jedrier bustled around the room in restless circles.
‘Can I really do this?’
But he decided to gather his courage.
For Henry.
And for himself.
With that resolve, he tried to step confidently outside.
But hardship arrived immediately, as though it had been waiting for him.
“I don’t have anything to wear?”
The clothes he had worn while walking through the garden with Henry, along with the clothes he had worn when he went outside the palace, had vanished without a trace.
No matter how many times he dug through the pile of clothes, he couldn’t find them.
Jedrier let out a deep sigh, and his gaze landed on the bed.
But he couldn’t exactly wear those clothes that were practically rags.
If he did, he would ruin his first impression from the very beginning.
Right now, for Henry’s sake, he needed to look as clean and presentable as possible.
“What do I do?”
There really wasn’t anything.
Nothing at all?
Jedrier’s eyes trembled as though an earthquake had struck them.
He let out the sigh that had risen all the way to his chin and sat down on the edge of the bed.
“I have nothing to wear.”
He had tried to find decent clothes—or at the very least, clean ones—but had gotten nowhere.
Most of what he could see was old and worn.
Whenever something looked relatively decent, it turned out to be riddled with holes.
If he went out wearing something like that, it was over.
The clothes he had on now were clean, but they weren’t exactly suitable for going out.
“What do I do?”
Now that he had made up his mind, he absolutely had to go today.
Besides, he was too anxious to endure waiting any longer.
With another deep sigh, Jedrier opened the wardrobe again.
He had already looked through it several times, but the lingering hope that there might be something he had somehow missed refused to disappear.
“Huh?”
That was when it happened.
Jedrier noticed a shirt and coat folded in the corner of the wardrobe.
As though entranced, he picked them up.
His lips parted.