Sharp teeth pierced through his skin. The pain shot up his neck so suddenly that Fu Xu let out a muffled cry, tears rushing to his eyes before he could stop them yet the bite he was bracing himself for, the completion of the mark, never happened. His body rejected it entirely.
The moment Shen Louchen’s pheromones entered his gland, it felt as if they had been thrown into an endless abyss, swallowed by darkness and vanishing without a trace.
“Why…” Shen Louchen breathed the word like a man on the edge of collapse, confusion and agony swirling in his eyes. He didn’t understand. Why couldn’t this omega be marked? Why did being close to him feel inexplicably soothing yet still fail to quiet the raging storm inside him?
He lashed out again and again, like a man driven half mad. Time after time, his teeth found Fu Xu’s gland; time after time, the mark failed. Each attempt doubled their suffering. Fu Xu’s neck had already turned into a raw, bloody mess, the pain so overwhelming he felt his consciousness fraying at the edges. His body instinctively tried to pull away but Shen Louchen’s grip was like iron, unyielding, locking him in place.
“Let go… please… Mr. Shen…” Fu Xu cried desperately, his voice trembling, tears blurring his vision until the room seemed to swim.
Just when he thought he might truly die like this, Shen Louchen finally froze. His forehead dropped against Fu Xu’s shoulder, his breath harsh and ragged like an old bellows gasping for its last bit of air, the metallic tang of blood thick in every exhale.
Somewhere in the chaos consuming his mind, something seemed to break through. Through the haze, he saw the ragged wounds on Fu Xu’s neck, saw the tears tracing down his cheeks, saw the fear, raw and desperate, in his eyes.
“I… I can’t be marked, Mr. Shen,” Fu Xu whispered, almost begging, “You deserve the best omega. I… I’ll apply for a divorce.”
For as long as he could remember, Mr. Shen had been the only person who treated him with any measure of kindness. Even if it had only been a little, even if it had only been the bare minimum, to Fu Xu, it had been precious. Maybe Mr. Shen wasn’t a good person, maybe he had countless flaws but he had fed him, given him shelter and even promised he could stay but now… he was the one who couldn’t stay.
“Don’t… go…” Shen Louchen’s voice cracked, rough and broken, carrying a tremor of emotion he himself didn’t seem aware of. “Stay with me…”
Fu Xu froze.
Stay… with Mr. Shen? Even if he couldn’t be marked?
The words exploded in his mind like thunder. This powerful alpha, this terrifying, cold, impossible to read man, was actually pleading with him?
He stared at Shen Louchen’s head buried in the crook of his neck, at the way his broad back was rigid with pain and for a moment his heart felt like it was stuck, blocked by something thick and heavy.
All his life, he had been the one discarded. The Fu family didn’t want him because he was a defective omega. Others looked at him with pity, disdain or outright disgust. No one had ever needed him. No one had ever told him, “Stay by my side.”
Even though everything right now hurt, even though Shen Louchen was only saying this because he was completely out of control, Fu Xu still felt something deep inside him stir, a tiny place in his chest warming as if touched by a fragile spark.
It hurt… but it also strangely felt like being needed.
The moment that thought surfaced, a faint sweetness began to spread from his body, a light, clean floral scent drifting softly into the air. It was subtle, delicate, impossibly pure, like the first flower to bloom in a garden right after rain clears into sunlight.
Shen Louchen’s head snapped up. He stared at Fu Xu in stunned silence.
What had he just done?
That sweetness lingering in the air washed over his senses like a clear stream. His fogged over consciousness suddenly began to recover, as if pulled back from the brink. He lowered his gaze to his hands, hands smeared with dried blood and then to the mangled wounds on Fu Xu’s neck.
His throat bobbed sharply, panic and helplessness flooding his expression, making him look almost like a child who had destroyed something precious without meaning to.
“I…” He tried to speak but his mind was a shattered mess. Thoughts slipped through his fingers like sand. Memories he should have had felt scattered, crumbled into fragments. All that remained in front of him was this trembling omega.
Fu Xu shivered under his stare. Just as he tried to inch back, Shen Louchen’s hand tightened gently around his wrist. The grip was soft this time, careful, tentative, devoid of the violence from before.
When Fu Xu timidly lifted his gaze, he found Shen Louchen’s normally icy eyes veiled in a faint gloss, reflecting his figure with startling clarity, carrying a quiet, inexplicable dependence.
“Does it hurt?” Shen Louchen asked softly, his voice low, tinged with a hidden panic. His thumb brushed over the red marks on Fu Xu’s wrist, absent mindedly tracing them as if he needed to confirm they were real.
Fu Xu hesitated, unable to speak for a moment. Before he could find any words, Shen Louchen clumsily reached out to touch the wounds on his neck. His fingertips grazed the torn skin and he jerked his hand back immediately, as if burned.
“I’ll get a doctor.” Shen Louchen pushed himself upright, taking a step but the moment he turned, he staggered. Instinctively, he reached back and caught Fu Xu’s arm again. The motion was so natural, so unthinking, as if being close to Fu Xu was where his body returned by default.
Fu Xu stumbled forward when Shen Louchen tugged him, nearly losing his balance. His heart beat even faster, panic clawing upward. What was happening to Mr. Shen now?
Was the suppressant’s after effect still lingering, clouding his mind? He looked at Shen Louchen’s tightly pressed lips, then at the hand gripping his arm, slender yet powerful fingers, knuckles turning faintly white as if terrified Fu Xu would slip away.
“You don’t have to… I can take care of it myself,” Fu Xu murmured softly. He tried to pull his hand back but Shen Louchen’s grip only tightened.
“No.” Shen Louchen’s brows drew together, his tone laced with stubborn insistence. “It will get infected.” His gaze moved slowly around the room before landing once more on Fu Xu’s face. His confusion deepened. “This place… is this my home?”
He didn’t remember ever buying a house like this.
Fu Xu’s heart dropped. Mr. Shen… had he lost his memory?
And indeed, Shen Louchen’s mind had become fractured. He remembered only that Liao Jiazhì would always give him an injection during the worst episodes, something that could lessen the pain. He remembered the immense agony churning through his body but not the reason behind it.
He couldn’t recall why the pain existed, nor why he was with the person in front of him. His memory felt brutally split in half, one side an empty, fog filled void, the other beginning from the moment he opened his eyes and saw Fu Xu standing before him.
But there was a pull inside him, that strange, unexplainable sense of gravity drawing him toward this person. He just wanted to follow him. To be close to him. As long as his eyes stayed on Fu Xu, the tight, restless agitation in his chest eased little by little.
“This is… Mr. Shen’s house,” Fu Xu said cautiously, weighing his words. Seeing Shen Louchen’s unfocused expression made his heart twist. Liao’s warning still echoed in his ears, the heavy, inescapable pressure of the divorce dangling above him but looking at this man who leaned on him, who relied on him so openly… How could he possibly say it now?
“Mine?” Shen Louchen frowned. The place didn’t match his taste at all. It looked more like something his father would buy.
“Well… Mr. Shen allowed me to stay here. So it’s… kind of ours…” Fu Xu said quietly, carefully.
The moment the word ours slipped out, Shen Louchen’s tense brows loosened a little. His grip on Fu Xu’s hand relaxed as well, though he still didn’t let go. “Oh.” He responded as if accepting it, though his eyes remained hazy. Then his attention shifted back to the injury on Fu Xu’s neck. “You… here”
His voice was soft, brushing past Fu Xu’s heart like a feather. Fu Xu shook his head, just about to respond, when the door suddenly slammed open.
Zong Yuan stood breathless at the entrance. The moment he saw the scene inside, his face drained of color. Shen Louchen’s shirt was stained with blood, Fu Xu’s neck was torn and raw and the two were still holding hands.
No matter how one looked at it, this resembled a violent incident that had yet to end.
“Minister! Are you alright?” Zong Yuan rushed forward, trying to pull them apart but Shen Louchen’s cold glance, quiet but fiercely protective, stopped him in his tracks. It wasn’t murderous but it held a sharp, territorial warning, like a beast guarding something it refused to let anyone touch.
Zong Yuan froze. Something felt very wrong today. He glanced at Fu Xu, worrying furrowing his brow. “Mr. Fu, you… this…” He swallowed the rest. He knew Fu Xu was a defective omega, incapable even of basic pheromone soothing.
Now that he’d ended up like this, how could he possibly take care of a Minister on the verge of losing control?
“Assistant Zong.” Fu Xu withdrew his hand, attempting to stand but Shen Louchen’s hand pressed gently but firmly onto his shoulder. Cold fingertips brushed through the fabric, applying the lightest pressure yet clearly saying don’t leave.
Zong Yuan caught every detail. He stepped closer, lowering his voice. “Mr. Fu, I know you may be in a difficult position but look at yourself right now…” He gestured toward Fu Xu’s wounded neck. “The Minister’s condition is unstable. He needs a trained caretaker. You…”
The implication was unmistakable: You can’t even take care of yourself, don’t drag the Minister down with you.
Fu Xu’s face paled. He knew he was useless. His gland was defective; he couldn’t even be marked and now he’d injured himself. He was a burden. Back in the Fu family, he had been used to such looks, those eyes filled with pity, disdain and subtle mockery. Needles buried under polite expressions.
Mother always told him to be obedient, to be quiet, to never cause trouble. Only then would others pity him enough to let him eat. So he had grown used to bending, to shrinking, to agreeing with everything, living like a patch of moss in a shadowed corner, alive but almost nonexistent.
But Shen Louchen’s earlier “don’t leave,” and the hand now resting firmly on his shoulder, these two things dropped into the still waters of his heart, sending ripples outwards.
Fu Xu slowly raised his head. He looked at Zong Yuan’s tense expression, then turned toward Shen Louchen. The alpha stared at him without blinking, his gaze filled with a dependence so clear it nearly overflowed.
“I can do it.” Fu Xu heard himself speak. His voice was soft but steady.
Zong Yuan blinked. “You… what?”
“I said… I can take care of him.” Fu Xu clenched his fists, forcing strength into the words.
For a moment, Zong Yuan was speechless. He looked toward the Minister, seeking confirmation but Shen Louchen simply lowered his gaze to the side of Fu Xu’s face, his fingers unconsciously rubbing the fabric of Fu Xu’s shoulder.
He looked completely trusting, like a towering tree leaning on a fragile vine for stability, nothing like the cold, commanding man Zong Yuan knew.
“Minister, you..” he began.
“Get out.” Shen Louchen’s voice cut cleanly across his words.
It wasn’t loud. It didn’t brim with anger.
Yet the finality in it allowed no argument.
Zong Yuan froze. Only now did he fully realize the Minister’s guard had been up the entire time and that the command had been issued in protection of Fu Xu. Conflicted and uncertain, he walked toward the door.
Before leaving, he turned back and saw Shen Louchen lowering his head, touching the edge of the bandage on Fu Xu’s neck with the gentlest brush of his fingers.
This was not the violence of someone out of control. This was… something entirely different.
Zong Yuan left, closing the door quietly behind him.
Silence settled over the room, so thick that even the sound of Shen Louchen’s unsteady breathing felt sharp. Fu Xu shifted his shoulder slightly, meaning to remind him to loosen his grip but Shen Louchen tightened his hold first, voice muffled and strangely earnest.
“Don’t let him come again.”
Fu Xu blinked in surprise.
When he turned, he met Shen Louchen’s eyes. Those eyes, once icy and distant, now shone clearly in the warm glow of the moonlight, like crushed stars collected in deep water and buried in their depths was unease.
“He looks at you badly,” Shen Louchen said.
The hostility had been obvious.
Something softly struck the inside of Fu Xu’s chest. Shen Louchen had noticed that? He opened his mouth, wanting to say that Assistant Zong was only worried about the Minister but Shen Louchen suddenly leaned closer.
His breath brushed against Fu Xu’s ear, cool, carrying a faint hint of red wine and the warmth of it scattered his panic.
“You said… you would take care of me?” Shen Louchen’s voice was low, husky, almost intimate.
Fu Xu nodded, though his fingers curled slightly. Deep down, he knew he didn’t have much confidence. Someone like Mr. Shen, how could someone like him be “taken care of” by someone like Fu Xu? But the dependence in Shen Louchen’s eyes made those words, actually I can’t, stick in his throat.
Shen Louchen’s expression brightened faintly, as if he’d received a promise of enormous importance. His grip tightened around Fu Xu’s hand, though he made sure to avoid the bruised part of his wrist. “Then you can’t leave,” he said. His tone was natural, matter of fact but beneath it lurked an unsteady plea. “You can’t leave.”
Fu Xu looked at him and the idea of divorce sank even deeper into a heavy pit within him. Liao had said they had to divorce but he hadn’t said it had to be now. He couldn’t abandon someone dealing with lingering symptoms, not like this. Not when that person was Mr. Shen.
Fu Xu found he still couldn’t utter Liao Jiazhili’s threat.
Forget it… he would deal with it later.
Outside, the moon had slipped behind clouds, leaving only the soft glow of the bedside lamp stretching their shadows long across the floor.
Fu Xu lowered his gaze to the bandage wrapped around his injured neck. As he reached to touch the edge, a cool hand pressed gently over his.
“Don’t.” Shen Louchen’s voice was clear in the quiet room, carrying a firm seriousness. “It will hurt.”
Fu Xu froze, then slowly lifted his eyes. Shen Louchen’s gaze was steady, warmer than he had ever seen it, none of the previous aloofness, none of the distance.
“I’ll… go get some water,” Fu Xu whispered, trying to escape that too intense attention. He stood but before he took a step, he felt the hem of his clothes being tugged lightly.
Shen Louchen sat at the edge of the bed, looking up at him with a faint ripple of anxiety in his eyes.
“I’ll go with you.”
Fu Xu didn’t refuse. His steps merely slowed. Something about Shen Louchen now reminded him of a large creature just born, something imposing by nature but treating the first person it saw as its anchor, its family. That feeling left Fu Xu both overwhelmed and strangely soft hearted.
The kitchen lay at the end of the hallway. Fu Xu walked in front while Shen Louchen followed behind, their distance never more than half a step, like a shadow refusing to stray.
Fu Xu opened the refrigerator with trembling fingers, reaching for a bottle of water but before he could grasp it, a hand wrapped gently around his wrist.
Fu Xu blinked. He had always done housework by habit but he wasn’t familiar enough with the space to act as though it were his home. Had he misread Shen Louchen’s intentions? Was Mr. Shen trying to stop him?
“I… I wasn’t trying to…” Fu Xu murmured, instinctively apologizing.
Shen Louchen frowned. His gaze drifted down to the skinny wrist in his hand.
The bones were pronounced. The skin is dry, the flesh thin, nearly malnourished.
Had the Shen family been treating him so harshly?
The thought flashed across his mind. Without hesitation, he tugged Fu Xu to the pantry, opened a cabinet and pulled out an entire box of milk. There were no tools around, so Shen Louchen simply tore open the packaging with raw strength. He grabbed a bottle and placed it into Fu Xu’s hands.
“Drink this.” His fingers brushed lightly over the back of Fu Xu’s hand, cool and gentle.
“This is good for your health.”
Fu Xu froze for a moment.
His stomach problems… he had always thought Mr. Shen wouldn’t care about something so trivial. Could it be that his memory hadn’t completely disappeared? But when he looked into that pair of clear, bewildered eyes, it didn’t look like someone who remembered the past at all.
He accepted the bottle of milk and along with the warmth that seeped into his fingers, something faintly warmed inside his chest as well. He whispered, “Thank you.”
When Shen Louchen heard that soft “thank you,” the corner of his mouth seemed to lift by a fraction, so slight it almost disappeared in the blink of an eye, before returning to its usual quiet, dazed expression.
His hand, which had been lightly pinching the hem of Fu Xu’s clothes, loosened a little, though he still followed closely behind him, step for step, as though that tether between them had become instinctive.
While Fu Xu drank the milk, Shen Louchen simply stood at his side, silently watching him. His gaze landed on Fu Xu’s throat, carefully observing the way his Adam’s apple moved with each swallow, his eyes focused to the point of excess, like he was studying something precious.
Fu Xu felt his cheeks burn under that unblinking stare. He hurriedly finished the milk and tried to return to the bedroom but Shen Louchen naturally trailed after him again. When they reached the bedroom door, Fu Xu stopped, turning to face the man behind him.
“Mr. Shen… you should rest too.”
Shen Louchen’s brows drew together almost imperceptibly, as if he didn’t understand or simply didn’t want to understand. “And you?”
“You… don’t sleep here.” Fu Xu pointed toward the far end of the corridor, the door with the custom lock, Shen Louchen’s private room. “You usually stay in that room.”
He took two small steps back. It wasn’t that he wanted to leave. He knew perfectly well that Shen Louchen’s condition was due to lingering side effects of the inhibitor. If he could take care of him properly during this unstable period, then maybe once Mr. Shen recovered, he would be willing to help Fu Xu find a place to live.
Besides, Mr. Shen had warned him very clearly before, he must not have any improper thoughts and even the slightest step beyond the line might leave him with no guarantee of walking out of the Shen residence alive.
Shen Louchen followed the direction of his finger to the tightly closed room, then turned back. The confusion in his eyes shifted gradually into a kind of wounded grievance, like a large, abandoned dog left out in the rain.
“I…” He opened his mouth, seemingly searching for the right words. After a long moment, he finally murmured, “I can’t sleep alone.”
“Then… Do you want a stuffed toy or something?” If that was the case, Fu Xu could ask Butler Chen to arrange it.
“No.” Shen Louchen rejected the idea instantly. He simply reached out and pulled Fu Xu into the room.
“How about… Mr. Shen, you sleep here and I’ll take the couch?” Fu Xu retreated a step, pointing at the small single sofa against the wall.
Shen Louchen looked between the sofa and Fu Xu, his expression cooling visibly. Eventually, he shook his head, his voice low, almost delivered like a quiet plea. “Too far from you.”
Fu Xu was completely out of solutions. He looked into those startlingly bright eyes, eyes where his own reflection appeared clearly, eyes filled with a kind of desperate reliance, as though if he voiced even one word of refusal, that fragile light within them would extinguish instantly.
“But…” He didn’t know how to refuse. He had never refused anyone. His voice shrank, barely as loud as a mosquito’s hum. “But…”
Shen Louchen didn’t bother hearing him out. With a small huff, he shrugged off his coat, slipped onto the bed with quick, decisive movements and in the process dragged Fu Xu along with him.
“Mr. Shen…” This wasn’t appropriate.
Fu Xu’s heart thundered violently in his chest. He heard the soft rustle of fabric behind him and felt Shen Louchen’s warm presence envelop him. The clean, cool scent of an alpha wrapped around him like a breeze sweeping through a mountain stream, crisp, untainted, inexplicably reassuring.
“Don’t make me say it a second time.”
Even with part of his memories lost, the dominance carved deep into his bones had not faded. That quiet but firm order made Fu Xu swallow any objection he had left.
At first, he lay stiffly, hardly daring to breathe, terrified that even the slightest movement might brush up against the man behind him but after a long time, nothing happened. Only the steady rhythm of Shen Louchen’s breathing touched his ears, soft, with a faint tremor every so often.
Slowly, Fu Xu eased. His tense nerves unwound and the exhaustion from the past few days, along with the fright from earlier, swept up all at once. His eyelids grew heavier.
Just as he was drifting into sleep, he felt the man behind him shift slightly.
Then an arm slipped carefully around his waist, hovering at first, as if testing whether he would pull away, before settling lightly against him.
Fu Xu’s heart lurched violently, snapping him back to full awareness. He opened his mouth to speak but Shen Louchen’s muffled voice brushed his ear, low and hoarse with drowsiness.
“Don’t run.”
The words were so soft, so warm, they brushed across his heart like a feather, leaving him unable to say anything. He felt Shen Louchen’s breath against his neck, warm, gently fanning across his skin, blending with the subtle scent of alpha pheromones, creating a strange yet soothing comfort.
Fu Xu gradually relaxed. He let that arm remain around him. It felt like being wrapped by an invisible net, gentle, secure. He had never felt this kind of warmth. In the Fu household, he grew up curled alone on a narrow, icy bed, forced awake at every sound to work. Over time, he developed an instinctive light sleep, waking at the slightest movement.
Yet now, with Shen Louchen holding him this quietly, listening to those calm breaths, he felt more secure than he had ever felt in his life. Before long, he drifted into a deep, peaceful sleep.
It was the first night in his memory where he slept without a single nightmare.
✦ ✧ ✦
Vynellia
[Translator]
☕ A LITTLE SOMETHING FOR THE TRANSLATOR
The translator humbly requests tribute in coffee form. (づ｡◕‿‿◕｡)づ ☕
☕ BUY THEM A COFFEE →
✧ (づ｡•ㅅ•｡)づ ☕ ✧
✦ thank you for reading ✦
← PreviousNext →
ChaptersChapter 1 · Substitute MarriageChapter 2 · PleaseChapter 3 · Thank you, Mr. ShenChapter 4 · Mr. Shen, are you going to throw me away?Chapter 5 · You don’t have to please me in everythingChapter 6 · Is This For Him?Chapter 7 · Do you know you don’t have long to live?Chapter 8 · But what about you? What will you be then?Chapter 9 · That’s a vehicle from the logistics department.Chapter 10 · What do you take my Shen family for?Chapter 11 · Can I bite your gland?Chapter 12 · He is not my “medicine catalyst”Chapter 13 · Who is that Alpha?Chapter 14 · Perfectly matched omegaChapter 15 · Perhaps you could call him, baby?Chapter 16 · That’s… Fu Xu’s scent?Chapter 17 · It was made by the masterChapter 18 · Abusing a pregnant omega is a serious crime.Chapter 19 · Mr. Shen is the best alpha.Chapter 20 · Family elderChapter 21 · Shen Louchen’s berserk periodChapter 22 Part 1 · You are my wifeChapter 22 Part 2 · You are my wifeChapter 23 · Aren’t we mutually in love?Chapter 24 · Which alpha did you go to see?Chapter 25 · Fu Xu, tell me you like meChapter 26 · Could Mr. Shen possibly have a little crush on him?Chapter 27 · Get out!Chapter 28 · Stay close to meChapter 29 · Mr. Shen and I are a legally married coupleChapter 30 · Spit it outChapter 31 · He’s been acting increasingly strangely latelyChapter 32 · Do you listen to everyone except me?Chapter 33 · Monthly ExamChapter 34 · Parent Teacher MeetingChapter 35 · The classroom was cold at nightChapter 36 · Court deathChapter 37 · Wife, Kiss meChapter 38 · This omega trying to steal a kiss from him?Chapter 39 · His omega turned out to be a little cunning.Chapter 40 · Is this little omega taking advantage of him?Chapter 41 · “Madam Shen” is your trump card, understand?Chapter 42 · Mr. Shen, I don’t know how to wear it…Chapter 43 · HusbandChapter 44 · Why is Shen Louchen acting like a peacockChapter 45 · I won’t abandon you, and I never willChapter 46 · Omega with a 92% match rateChapter 47 · Are you waiting for him?Chapter 48 · How can someone magically transformChapter 49 · Now it’s all good, two kids.Chapter 50 · Mr. Shen, will you regret it then?Chapter 51 · What is regret?Chapter 52 · If you’ve got the guts, say it again!Chapter 53 · That’s my milk teaChapter 54 · What he wanted to replace was the alphaChapter 55 · How do you know I’m not part of Mr. Shen’s plan?Chapter 56 · Why don’t you just kill me?Chapter 57 · Are we sending him away?Chapter 58 · Are you angry?Chapter 59 · Inhibitor or marker?Chapter 60 · Let Fu Xu mark himChapter 61 · There should be limits to joking, right?Chapter 62 · Do you really not like Young Master Lian?Chapter 63 · Will you still love me after I go to school?Chapter 64 · You are the best husband in the worldChapter 65 · Extra 1Chapter 66 · Extra 2