Shortly after I got engaged to Princess Aliya, my younger brother Garrett also got engaged.
His fiancée was Rebecca Howard, the oldest daughter of the Howard family. She was the same age as Garrett—fourteen years old.
I knew my parents had been trying hard to arrange a match with the Howards for either me or my brother, but I wasn’t interested. I thought she was supposed to be my age—maybe a year younger at most. I’d planned to find her right away, but I had no idea how the one who granted my “wish” understood those few minutes—or maybe it was more than that. I’d guessed she might be a few years older than me, but a girl younger than me—by three whole years—was completely out of my mind.
The Howards didn’t want to marry their daughter into the royal family.
So even when my parents set up casual meetings, even when we visited the Marquis Howard estate as an inspection, they always found a way to keep their daughter away from us brothers.
But my parents didn’t give up, no matter how it looked. Once my engagement was settled, the Howards finally agreed.
Garrett accepted a fiancée he’d never met without complaint, but now Rebecca’s amazing skills seemed to scare him. I wanted to say: you’re the one who didn’t choose your own partner—you have no right to complain. Be the kind of man she deserves. But I didn’t plan to get involved in my brother’s marriage. No, I hadn’t… until now.
Then I saw her. The girl my brother introduced as his fiancée. Rebecca Howard, standing next to Garrett. The shock was so big I thought I’d stop breathing.
No mistake. It was her. My other half. I knew it right away.
Of course, her appearance was different. Silver hair, amethyst eyes. If I just compared looks, the girl in front of me was much prettier than her old self. But what pulled me in was her soul—that inner light, the same thing I’d felt when I first met her before.
An overpowering joy took over me. I wanted to run to her, pull her into a tight hug, kiss her until I’d taken every breath she had. I forced myself to stop.
That would be a disaster. This was the time to show the royal training I’d gotten. I calmed down and welcomed them.
”It’s an honor to meet you. I’m Rebecca Howard, daughter of the Marquis Howard.”
When Garrett introduced us, she said her name and curtsied with an elegance that seemed too grown-up for her age. Her silver hair flowed like water.
When our eyes met for just a second, I was shocked.
There was no surprise in her eyes at seeing me again, no quiet sweetness of love. It was a proper, polite smile—the kind a good noble lady would give, friendly but with no hint of desire.
Could it be… she didn’t remember me?!
No—she was engaged to Garrett. She couldn’t show any reaction!
That’s what I wanted to think, but cold sweat ran down my back.
I spoke to her with the same words I’d used when we first met.
”You will fall in love with me.”
As Crown Prince, I normally used formal language. Garrett looked confused. And Rebecca—she smiled in a vague way and said, “Of course, Your Highness. I’m just one of the people who respect and love the royal family.”
Respect and love for the royal family…
Her slightly troubled expression was the same as in her past life. But the reunion I’d imagined was very different from this.
Rebecca didn’t remember her past life.
Once I got over the first shock, I quickly changed how I thought about it.
It was sad she didn’t remember, but she was the one I’d promised to stay with no matter how many times we were reborn. The joy of finally finding her filled me again.
At the same time, I realized how much I’d been holding onto those past-life memories.
My idea that she’d be the same age. My unfounded confidence that she’d remember me too. There were probably other things I hadn’t noticed yet.
I was Ethan now, not Shu. And she was Rebecca, not Saki—I’d missed such an obvious truth.
The cost was high. She’d been closer than I ever imagined, and I’d failed to find her.
Of course I had. I’d been looking for Saki. I hadn’t thought once about her situation in this new life.
All because of my selfish ideas, things had gotten messy—but that was my own fault.
Still, one thing was certain.
Even if it was fake, I was currently engaged to a foreign princess. Telling her how I felt would be the stupidest thing I could do.
She was my other half. My soul’s partner.
Of course, as people we existed separately. But the basic core of what made me me and her her—that would never change, even through rebirth.
We were intense. Our desire to own each other was strong. We forgave no betrayal. But in return, our love was deep.
If we took something, we took everything. If we couldn’t have it, we cut it out completely.
”If you ever cheated, we’d get divorced right away.”
That’s what she said, when we were married. If we hadn’t been married, she’d have said, “If you ever cheated, we’d be done, no questions asked”—because that’s who I was too. All or nothing. That was the one thing we could never give in on.
That’s why I was sure. If I told her how I felt while I still had a fiancée, she would never open her heart to me. On the surface, we might get along, but the deep trust we’d had in our past life would be gone.
Of course, things were different now. I’d planned to explain that my engagement to Princess Aliya was temporary and fake, an agreement I’d made to find her. If she wanted, I could even introduce them.
The contract with Princess Aliya had been made with that in mind—but that depended on Rebecca remembering her past life.
Now, if I—a complete stranger to her—begged for her love, saying my engagement was just a contract and she was the only one I loved, would she accept? No. If I put myself in her place, I knew it wouldn’t work. It was already too late the moment I tried to get close to her without ending my engagement first. The problem was that I couldn’t even show enough honesty to take care of my own business first.
And now she was engaged too. She’d probably accepted it as a political agreement, but she wouldn’t betray Garrett to be with me.
Even reborn, I was still me. Even without her memories, she was still herself—of that I had no doubt.
By the way, I could see signs that she hadn’t really changed in Rebecca’s background.
I could now understand why my parents had been so determined to marry her to one of us. Rebecca’s education was amazing—the kind fit for a future queen.
Her father—my former father-in-law—had been an executive at a big car company, a self-made man who never spoiled his daughter but never stopped her from learning. And she never let him down. Her serious nature made her extremely diligent. On top of that, she was very competitive—the type who did well with discipline.
Even without her memories, there were traces of her past life in Rebecca’s background.
I couldn’t get close to her while I was still engaged. I could stay nearby as her future brother-in-law, but with the woman I loved right in front of me, how long could I resist going after her?
Until I’d settled my business, I couldn’t even bring myself to see her.
It had been seventeen years since that painful goodbye. After everything I’d been through, there was no way I couldn’t wait a few more years to make things right.
My contract with Princess Aliya was for four years of fake engagement at most. If the princess could get the proof to bring down her late mother’s enemy, we could end it even sooner. I hoped she’d find a way to corner the second queen—now promoted to first queen—quickly, but it wouldn’t be that easy. I decided to quietly start my own investigation to speed up the engagement’s end.
After a short, pleasant talk, Rebecca left.
Watching her walk away, I desperately wished for the day I could hold her in my arms.
In my past life, it had taken three years from when I fell in love to when I won her heart. Our paths would cross again. It was just a few more years of waiting… I told myself that to feel better.
For now, I had things to do.
I called out to Garrett, who was walking Rebecca out.
”Garrett—after you take her home, come back. I need to talk to you.”
Summary:
Ethan discovers that the girl his younger brother Garrett is engaged to is the reincarnation of his past-life wife Saki, though she retains no memories of him. He realizes his selfish assumptions about finding her have cost him precious time and proximity. Despite the overwhelming joy of reunion, he recognizes the impossibility of pursuing her while both are engaged to others, resolving to settle his affairs before attempting to win her again.
Trivia:
- Ethan’s engagement to Princess Aliya is a faux arrangement meant to help her investigate her mother’s murder—not a real romantic engagement.
- The contract with Aliya is for a maximum of four years and can be dissolved sooner if she secures evidence against the second queen.
- Ethan has been searching for his reincarnated wife for seventeen years since their separation.
- Rebecca’s father was a self-made executive at a major automotive company in his past life, which shaped her disciplined upbringing.
- Ethan’s past-life name was Shu, and his wife’s name was Saki.
- Rebecca is three years younger than Ethan, contrary to his assumption she would be the same age.
- The first time Ethan met Rebecca in his past life, he told her “You will fall in love with me”—a line he repeats in this life.
- Ethan normally uses formal “watashi” speech as Crown Prince, but defaults to casual “ore” in internal narration and private moments.
- The Howards had no ambition for royal marriage and actively avoided introductions with Ethan and Garrett.
- It took Ethan three years from falling in love to winning Saki’s heart in his past life.
Translation Notes:
1 ↩ The Japanese term combines “reverence” (敬) and “affection/love” (愛)—a formal, public-spirited term used toward monarchs, distinct from romantic love. Rebecca’s use of this term signals her polite distance and lack of personal feelings toward Ethan.
2 ↩ A Buddhist-derived term meaning “one’s own actions, one’s own reward”—karmic retribution. Ethan uses it to acknowledge that his current predicament is entirely his own fault.
3 ↩ Refers to Japanese sports club culture—characterized by discipline, hierarchy, competitiveness, and physical rigor. The term describes someone who thrives on structured athletic training and competition, not just an athlete in the casual sense.