In the early morning, the air in Buena Village carried a hint of the crisp chill unique to late autumn.
Lynch woke up bright and early. As an apothecary who made a living by his craft, he never slacked off when it came to tending his herb garden.
Even though he had been exhausted yesterday—heading into the mountains to hunt monsters and coming back to cook a lavish bear paw feast—Lynch was in surprisingly good spirits.
Perhaps it was because... the massage last night had been truly effective?
Thinking of Felsy's defenseless sleeping face from the night before, Lynch couldn't stop the corners of his mouth from curling into a wide grin as he loosened the soil around the blood-stopping herbs. Even the hoe in his hands swung to a brisk, cheerful rhythm.
"Looks like I should give her more massages in the future. Not only does it boost her affection for me, but it also helps her get a good night's sleep. Killing two birds with one stone."
After working for about an hour, Lynch wiped the sweat from his forehead, straightened his back, and prepared to head to the backyard to chop some firewood and start cooking breakfast.
However, as he passed by the old date tree in the middle of the courtyard, he froze instantly.
"Holy crap?!"
Lynch's eyes widened, and the towel he used to wipe his sweat nearly slipped from his grasp.
Hanging from the date tree, which was usually used for shade, was an unidentified object.
It was a petite figure, suspended upside down by the ankles with a rope made of an unrecognizable material, doing perfectly rhythmic circular motions in the air along with the morning breeze.
One circle, two circles, three circles...
It was Kuma.
This beast-eared postman and guard, who had just gloriously taken up her post yesterday, now had her arms dangling limply. Her short red hair hung down, covering her face, and her normally lively beast ears drooped softly. She looked as if she had lost all worldly desires.
"What... what is going on?!"
Lynch panicked.
Did this kid overeat yesterday, or did she have a mental breakdown and decide to end it all?
Just as Lynch was about to rush over to save her, a cool and calm voice came from behind him.
"Leave her be."
Lynch turned around and saw Felsy standing under the eaves.
Today, she had changed into a pale blue long dress. Her long silver hair was casually tied behind her head, and she was holding a cup of warm water. Her expression was as tranquil as if she were reading the morning newspaper.
"Honey, this... Kuma is..." Lynch pointed at the spinning top in the tree. "This looks a bit... dangerous."
"It is not dangerous."
Felsy gracefully took a sip of water, a fleeting hint of imperceptible slyness flashing in her purple eyes, and then she began to spout absolute nonsense with a completely straight face:
"This is a traditional custom unique to the beast-eared tribe, known as Anti-Dizziness Tolerance Enhancement Training."
"Huh?" Lynch was dumbfounded. "There's such a custom?"
"Mhm." Felsy nodded without blushing or skipping a heartbeat. "As you know, she is a postman. Delivering mail requires long hours of running, and sometimes crossing mountains and ridges. To prevent dizziness during strenuous exercise, which could lead to delivering mail to the wrong place, they have to undergo this kind of... upside-down spinning training from a young age."
Saying that, Felsy pointed at Kuma, who was still spinning in circles:
"She is doing her morning exercises. So that she can serve you... uh, serve the villagers more stably and efficiently."
"I-I see..."
Lynch was suddenly enlightened.
Although it sounded outrageous, considering this was another world and demi-human races like the beast-eared tribe indeed had many bizarre quirks, Lynch instantly accepted the explanation.
He looked at Kuma in the tree again, and his gaze changed instantly.
She was no longer an unfortunate victim, but a striver who would not hesitate to torture her own body early in the morning for the sake of her job and dreams!
"This is... so touching!"
Lynch sighed in admiration. "What a good kid! So dedicated to her work at such a young age, going to such lengths just to deliver mail! This level of professionalism makes her an absolute role model for Buena Village!"
"Kuma! Keep it up! I believe in you!" Lynch pumped his fist at the tree. "When you're done with your training, I'll fry you an extra egg!"
Up in the tree.
Kuma, whose soul had already been spun out of her body and who was currently pondering the ultimate meaning of life, faintly heard Lynch's shouts.
She wanted to cry, but crying upside down would make the tears flow into her brain.
Wuwuwu... Lady Witch... Are you a devil...
What anti-dizziness training... I was just punished because I took a peek...
And that stupid human... You actually believed her?! Is your brain filled with mush?! Hurry up and let me down, you bastard!
Unfortunately, her inner voice did not reach him.
After marveling at Kuma's dedication, Lynch was just about to turn and head to the kitchen when the system in his mind, which had been silent all night, suddenly sprang back to life with a Ding!
[Ding!]
[Host's current territory construction progress detected!]
[Congratulations, Host! Through unremitting efforts, you have successfully brought the World-Ending Witch of the Crimson Calamity (Married) and the Thirteenth Pillar of the Demon Realm's Scorched Earth Guard (Tamed) under your command!]
[Looking at the demon general undergoing evil special training in the courtyard, and the witch supervising the work from under the eaves, does a sense of accomplishment as the mastermind behind the scenes well up in your heart?]
[You are no longer a lowly apothecary; you are the prototype of a Demon Lord lurking in the human heartland, about to stir up a storm of blood and gore!]
[Since you now possess top-tier combat power, a stronghold worthy of the title Demon Lord is absolutely essential!]
[Issuing Main Quest: Expand the Demon's Lair!]
[Quest Description: That tiny herb garden can no longer contain your ever-expanding ambitions, nor the appetites of the monster girls. Please expand your herb garden outward by at least five hundred square meters within three days!]
[Quest Reward: Master-Level Ripening Fertilizer Formula (Sprinkle it down, and even dead wood will bloom, making all things grow wildly under your will!)]
Lynch: "..."
He stared at this long string of system notifications, which were full of edgy chuunibyou vibes and read as if every word was burning through a massive budget, his mouth twitching wildly.
"Demon Lord my ass!"
"Demon's Lair my ass!"
Lynch couldn't help but rant furiously in his mind:
"System, did you wake up on the wrong side of the bed? Who did I bring under my command? That's my wife! That's the little girl from next door who came to work part-time!"
"What evil special training? That's her dedicated morning exercise! What supervising? My wife is just enjoying the scenery!"
"And, expanding a vegetable garden is actually called Expanding the Demon's Lair by you? You even want me to occupy territory? I just want to plant some radishes, cabbages, and winter herbs, not man-eating plants for crying out loud!"
Lynch held his forehead, feeling mentally exhausted.
This delusional system was truly a lost cause. In its eyes, no matter what he did, even going to the toilet would probably be interpreted as releasing highly toxic biochemical weapons into nature.
"I'm clearly just an ordinary, good man who wants to take good care of his sickly wife, and casually provide a little family warmth to a lonely, innocent beast-eared girl..."
Lynch sighed.
However...
He glanced at the quest reward section—[Master-Level Ripening Fertilizer Formula].
"Master-level ripening?" Lynch's eyes lit up.
Winter was fast approaching, and the natural growth cycle of the herbs was simply too slow. If there really was a fertilizer capable of accelerating their maturation, it would undoubtedly solve a massive problem. At the very least, he could stockpile enough medicinal herbs and vegetables before the first snowfall.
"Forget it. For the sake of the rewards, I'll let it slide."
Lynch shook his head and hoisted his hoe over his shoulder.
He began to ponder how to expand the nursery. After all, this had been part of Lynch's plan all along. However, thanks to Brother System's extra antics, the priority of this task had now been bumped up to the absolute highest.