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The Wife I Picked Up Can’t Possibly Be the World-Ending Witch

Chapter 7 / 88

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Chapter 7 of 88

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Chapter 7: Congratulations on Hiring the Thirteenth Pillar

The Wife I Picked Up Can’t Possibly Be the World-Ending Witch

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Just as Lynch was considering whether to raise the price to six silver coins, the tavern doors were pushed open with a loud bang.

The little beast-eared girl who claimed to be the new mail carrier marched in aggressively, carrying a dark green mailbag that was even larger than herself.

Her gaze swept across the tavern before locking precisely onto Lynch.Full novel: The Wife I Picked Up Can’t Possibly Be the World-Ending Witch — read the rest free on N​o⁠v​e⁠l​C⁠o​d⁠e​x⁠.​o⁠r​g⁠

"Mr. Lynch Graywhite!"

Kuma strode over to Lynch and planted her hands on her hips. It was an attempt to make herself look more imposing, though the pair of fluffy ears only made her look even more adorable.

"I heard you're hiring a guard to go into the mountains to gather herbs?"

"Yes." Lynch looked at the returning little girl with some surprise. "Did you forget to give me a letter?"

"No letters!" Kuma puffed out her non-existent chest. "I'm here to apply for the job! I'll take this gig!"

"..."

Lynch was stunned for a moment before he couldn't help but burst out laughing.

He reached out a hand and measured Kuma's height. She barely reached his waist, and that was including the height of her perked-up ears.

"Little girl, stop joking around." Lynch waved his hand dismissively, as if coaxing a neighbor's child. "The mountains aren't a playground. There are big bad wolves that eat people, and black bears taller than you are. You should hurry up and deliver your letters, or go home and drink some milk to grow taller."

"Who are you calling a little girl?!"

Kuma instantly bristled, her tail thrashing wildly behind her, a sign of anger among the beast-eared race.

"I'm already twelve years old! According to the traditions of the beast-eared race, I am a warrior who can hunt independently!"

"Yes, yes, Miss Warrior." Lynch didn't know whether to laugh or cry. "But what I need is a guard who can help block magical beast attacks, not a mascot that I have to take care of instead. If I take you into the mountains and you end up crying from fright, I'd have to coax you. Wouldn't that be even more troublesome?"

Old Barton, who was standing to the side, joined in the teasing. "Hahaha, little Kuma, stop causing trouble. Mr. Lynch is going deep into the old forests. With your scrawny arms and legs, you wouldn't even be enough to fill the gaps between a magical beast's teeth. Why don't you come and have a glass of juice with your uncle Barton instead!"

"You... bunch of... blind... humans!"

Kuma ground her teeth in anger.

If it had been in the past, she would have torn these two reckless fools to shreds long ago. But now, for the sake of the Witch's family financial plan, and for the rent of five silver coins, she had to endure it!

Not only did she have to endure, but she also had to prove herself!

"It seems that unless I show off a little, you won't believe in the strength of this genius!"

Kuma took a deep breath, her brown vertical pupils contracting slightly.

Her gaze locked onto a pile of firewood stacked next to the tavern's fireplace. Among them was an unsplit ironwood log, as thick as a grown man's thigh.

Ironwood, as the name suggested, was as hard as steel. It usually took an experienced woodcutter dozens of strikes with a specially made axe to split it open.

"Hmph!"

Kuma let out a cold snort and strutted over to the ironwood log with an arrogant swagger.

She didn't pick up an axe, nor did she grab any other tool.

Under the surprised gazes of Lynch and Old Barton, she slowly raised her small, soft, and pinkish hand.

Enhancement Magic, Tier 3: Monstrous Strength Collapse!

Although the Witch had strictly forbidden her from exposing her identity, as long as she didn't release any obvious magical glow and only enhanced her physical strength, these foolish humans wouldn't be able to tell, right?

Magic power instantly surged through her meridians, converging in her palm.

"Hah!"

Accompanied by a crisp, sharp shout, Kuma's small hand turned into a knifehand strike and chopped heavily onto the hard ironwood.

Crack!

A teeth-achingly sharp crack echoed throughout the tavern.

That ironwood log, which even an axe would struggle to split, was as fragile as a crisp biscuit under Kuma's small hand. In an instant, it split neatly into two halves right down the middle, sending wood chips flying!

Because she had used too much force, her knifehand didn't lose its momentum after splitting the wood. It smashed heavily onto the floor below, forcibly leaving a shallow crater in the thick oak floorboards.

Silence.

Deathly silence.

The wine glass in Old Barton's hand dropped onto the table with a clatter, spilling wine all over himself without him even noticing.

Lynch's mouth fell wide open. He looked at the split wood, then at Kuma's completely unharmed small hand, which was even slightly flushed red from the influx of magic power.

"This..." Lynch swallowed hard.

Kuma retracted her hand, dusted the wood chips off her palm, and turned around. A smug smile appeared on her face, revealing a small canine tooth.

"How about that? Am I qualified to be a guard now?"

"I told you, our beast-eared race is very strong! This is just basic stuff!"

In truth, her hand was tingling a little. After all, for the sake of visual impact, she hadn't used her full power to protect her body.

Lynch snapped back to reality, his gaze turning somewhat strange.

In his past life, he had heard of tropes like King Kong Barbie or little girls with old man strength, but seeing it with his own eyes was still quite shocking.

"Amazing..." Lynch praised sincerely. "Is this the innate monstrous strength of the beast-eared race? I didn't expect such a small body to contain such terrifying explosive power. It seems you're the type with rampant adrenaline secretion?"

He automatically attributed this supernatural display to the racial talents of this alternate world. After all, in this world, the physical constitutions of demi-human races were indeed generally stronger than those of humans.

"That's right! It's an innate talent!" Aunt Susan, who had approached from the side at some unknown point with a rag in her hand, said calmly. "Lynch, don't underestimate the beast-eared race. I've read in books that the beast-eared children in the south grow up wrestling tigers and lions from a young age. Although this little girl looks small, with this kind of arm strength, tsk tsk, she'll definitely have no problem helping you carry your herb basket and fighting off wild boars."

With Aunt Susan's authoritative certification and the visual impact of splitting ironwood barehanded just now, most of Lynch's concerns were dispelled.

"Alright."

Lynch nodded. Looking at the expectant little girl in front of him, who was actually just expecting to finish her task and report back, his heart softened.

Thinking about it carefully, for her to come out and work as a mail carrier and a guard to earn money at such a young age, life must be hard for her, right? Perhaps it was to buy food for her younger siblings at home?

Sigh, what a sensible child.

Five silver coins wasn't a small amount to him, but it wasn't too much either. He would just treat it as taking a neighbor's kid out for a picnic, letting her earn some pocket money to subsidize her family's expenses along the way. Anyway, he still had the attribute points rewarded by the system backing him up. If they really encountered any grave danger, he could just grab her and run.

"Alright, Miss Kuma, you're hired."

Lynch took five silver coins from his pocket, placed them on the table, and pushed them over.

"This is the deposit and the payment, five silver coins in total. Your task is to accompany me into the mountains to gather herbs, keep watch, and deal with any wild beasts that might appear. If there's an emergency, you must prioritize protecting yourself, understand?"

"Deal!"

Kuma's eyes lit up. Snatching up the silver coin, Kuma stuffed it into that bulging mailbag.

Great! Step one of the mission is complete! Lady Witch's secret stash has been secured!

It happened at the exact moment their hands touched—even though it was merely a light brush of their fingertips when handing over the money.

In Lynch's mind, the long-absent system notification suddenly chimed without any warning.

[Ding!]

[Detected that the host is engaging in an important personnel employment action!]

[Congratulations! You have successfully hired the high-ranking demon cadre, the Thirteenth Pillar of the Scorched Earth Guard, codenamed "Rabid Beast": Kurisma!]

Full novel: The Wife I Picked Up Can’t Possibly Be the World-Ending Witch — read the rest free on N​o⁠v​e⁠l​C⁠o​d⁠e​x⁠.​o⁠r​g⁠
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