The four of us split up at the end of lunch to visit our lockers and met back up in Mr. Takahata's classroom. I had almost handed the note from the office to the teacher before I remembered that he had already seen it. Even after relaxing with my friends at lunch, the relentless anxiety of my first day at school was starting to take its toll. The dozen years of school memories I had inherited from Lucas were little comfort. Within those hand-me-down experiences, Lucas seemed mostly comfortable at school outside of his recent struggles with trigonometry and occasional bouts of drowsiness. Unfortunately, I could never be him.
I sat in Lucas's normal seat and I found myself surrounded by his friends. They flipped open their notes and readied themselves for class as the rest of Lucas's classmates returned from lunch. Chris and Dan were talking quietly to each other and I did not want to barge into their conversation.
Chris's brief mention of college at lunch floated through my head as I pulled out my notebook and flipped to the first blank page. What in the world was I going to do with my future? Lucas's plan—work for a year to save up money then attend Thread Creek Community College—seemed solid enough. I could transfer from there to a university and complete a four-year degree. Maybe I could even get in contact with other magic users on campus. Since my magic was not dependent on a guardian spirit, it might be worthwhile as a full-time job instead of a more conventional career path. Feeling inspired, I flipped through my former self's history notebook looking for any notes about historical events that might be supernatural in origin. I had no memories of Lucas writing about unexplained phenomena, but then again most of the pages I had skimmed so far were completely new to me.
I snapped my attention back to the classroom and noticed the teacher had already started talking. It was a little odd that he was introducing new material within a week of an exam date, but I was grateful to get the chance to experience at least part of the class firsthand. I pushed all the other thoughts out of my head and tried my best to focus and take notes. Tonight, I was going to have to review Lucas's history notebook and reread the textbook sections the test was going to cover. This did not help my anxiety level in any way. Finally, after a full hour, the bell rang and the lecture about the effects of the industrial revolution on the world ended.
"I cannot believe I have to relearn this entire unit before the test next week," I complained to Chris as we both headed to our lockers. We had neighboring lockers right outside Mr. Takahata's classroom, so we always got to spend most of this break talking before I had to leave for Spanish class.
"Oh, you really don't remember any of that class?" Chris gave me a concerned look.
"Yeah. There are probably a lot more gaps just like this. It is a bit hard to tell where the gaps are when you do not even know where to start," I said with a shrug.
"Well, maybe we can meet up after school this week and go over our notes?" Chris offered.
"The four of us?" I asked.
"Uh... yeah!" Chris hesitated a moment before answering.
"That would help a lot. Thanks Chris," I replied with a smile.
"I look out for my friends," Chris said. It was a simple phrase, but the moment I heard it, my heart was flooded with warmth. An absurd grin split my face and I narrowly resisted hugging him. Chris and Sarah had now both confirmed that they viewed me as a friend, leaving Dan as the only remaining holdout.
As I grabbed my books for Spanish class, I spotted the gym bag I had packed with my new clothes from the weekend shopping trip. I suddenly had an idea; if I went directly from Spanish to gym it would mean I could change before anyone else got there. I threw the gym bag over my shoulder and made my way to Spanish class. For the second to last time today, I handed the now very crumpled note on official district stationery to the teacher and sat at a random desk. After a full day of following Lucas's seating habits, I was curious to see if changing it up made any difference in how people reacted to me. The seats in my classes were not actually assigned, but people still tended to sit in the same place every day. The year was nearly over, and their routines had already solidified.
"Hello, I don't think we've met," a boy said as he cautiously approached. His brown hair and bespectacled face were not ringing a bell for me.
"Hi, I am Laura," I replied. I then realized that I might be sitting in his seat. "Sorry, is this your spot?"
"I'm Eric. Don't worry about it, I'll just sit here instead," he said, moving to the desk behind me. He had not reacted to my name. Maybe the rumors had not spread to everyone in my grade just yet. "So, you're jumping right into the middle of Spanish four? Bold."
I laughed, "If you say so. I am not exactly a beginner at all this. I should be able to keep up with the rest of the class. I do not think I can actually speak it conversationally though." It was true, I could remember a significant number of words and verb conjugations, but when it came to forming a sentence, I had to write it all down first before speaking. I knew enough of the language to pass a written test, but not enough to speak it. So that left history as the only class I could not recall. I sighed in relief. I was not sure if I could have handled reviewing two full classes before their next tests, especially with finals quickly approaching.
"Well, if you ever need a study partner, I'd be happy to pair up," he said with a smile. The expression lit up his face like a spotlight and I had to blink to clear my vision.
"Thanks, that would help a lot." I said, returning his smile.
Eric scribbled in his spiral bound notebook for a moment and then quickly ripped the entire page out, handed it to me, and said, "Here's my phone number and address if you take me up on my offer." I accepted the sheet of paper and looked it over. He had written his name, Eric Thompson, his address, and his home phone number in neat handwriting, but he had written across the lines of the page instead of on them. Did that mean something? I carefully slipped his contact info into the front of my notebook just as the bell rang to start class.
This teacher, Miss Lorentz, was another silent attendance taker. As she scanned the room her gaze lingered on me, and she gave me a strange look despite the note. Maybe it was because I was not in Lucas's normal seat?
She started her lecture, with significant portions entirely in Spanish, shortly after the bell. She quickly covered a lot of new vocabulary terms and then moved onto some new irregular verbs. She listed these verb conjugations in a table with six boxes even though we were not required to know the vosotros/vosotras conjugations for tests and quizzes. The second half of the lecture swapped gears, and language back to English, for a discussion of the culture and a little bit of history from a few Spanish speaking countries. From my memory the tests were not just about language proficiency but also included some culture and history questions as well. When I flipped through my notes as a review, it seemed not all the history knowledge had been scraped out of my brain after all. Just my memories from my fourth period class. When the bell rang, I was packed up and out the door in a flash.
I power walked down the halls to the locker room, carefully to remain below a running pace. I had to stop myself from entering the boys' side, which would have been incredibly embarrassing, and I instead walked all the way down the hall to the girls' lockers. The room was empty, and I passed through the main locker area and headed directly to a stall before closing the door. I sighed with relief and quickly changed into my gym clothes, using a hook on the back of the stall door to keep my dress off the ground. After I finished changing, I folded up the dress as best I could, put it in my gym bag, and locked my belongings in one of the half-sized gym lockers. As I exited, I could hear other girls entering right behind me, and I was glad I had been quick enough to avoid the crowds.
When the warning bell rang, I was already sitting on the bleachers where the students usually waited for gym to start. The gym teacher came out of his office and walked over to me.
"Well Miss Loranger, you sure got ready quick! Think you can spare any of that energy of yours for my class?" Mr. Winters said with a laugh.
"I guess so," I mumbled. Right then I remembered that I had not retrieved my note from the Spanish teacher in last period. He already seemed to know who I was somehow. How did he do that?
"Miss Knight told me at lunch," he said. The confusion must have shown clearly on my face.
"I will have to thank her. I left my note at my last class." I was relieved I did not have to explain my situation any further.
"Congratulations on coming out," he said quietly with a smile. The words felt warm but a bit out of place, and I was glad no one else was around to overhear our conversation. I had not expected the very tall, aggressively fit gym teacher who coached half the school teams to be supportive of trans people.
"Uh, thanks. Mr. Winters," I said haltingly. He smiled and nodded in acknowledgment.
"And Laura, if anyone is causing trouble for you, please let me know. I've known other students in similar positions to yours before, and I will do whatever it takes to keep you safe and comfortable here," he said evenly with a serious look on his face. All I had to offer him in return was a dazed smile that likely did not fully express my gratitude.
A few minutes after the start bell sounded, the other students had joined me on the bleachers.
"Welcome class, today is the first day warm enough for laps on the outdoor track!" Mr. Winters called in a cheerful voice. The class's reaction seemed mixed, and I hoped it really was as warm as he said. March did not strike me as the best time to go running. The class slowly stood up and filed out towards the track. I got a few strange looks from my classmates, specifically from the boys. Was it because of what I was wearing? The comfortable and stretchy pants that I bought from Danger were a bit form fitting. Combined with the sports bra and loose crew neck shirt I was feeling very free and light. It was almost as nice as wearing a dress.
The class eventually made it to the track, did a few stretches, and began a set of laps that alternated between running and walking. Some of the students on sports teams opted to skip the walking laps and run the whole time. As soon as I started running, I was glad Sarah had remembered sports bras on our shopping trip; this would have been impossible otherwise. I felt a bit stupid not even considering how important that bit of clothing would be.
If I was going to be dealing with shades and possibly worse things, then I needed to get in better shape. I finished the first lap and pushed myself to continue running. Footfall after footfall, I found that I was already in the rhythm and just kept pushing. As I continued, my long black hair started flying about in the light breeze and was getting in my eyes and mouth. Even with my hands occasionally pushing it from my face, it felt like a losing battle. I was going to need a hair band or a scrunchie for gym from now on. Maybe Sarah had some extras I could borrow? I could ask a classmate, but I barely knew any of them.
The start line approached and after three laps of running my legs and lungs were screaming to switch back to walking. Just a bit further and I could relax. I pushed onward. The line crossed under my feet, and I immediately slowed to a walk while breathing a sigh of relief. How the hell was I so out of shape? What was the point of transforming if it was not making me able to fight better? The release of power that washed over Lucas should have at least resulted in some increases in muscle tone if it was all about fighting.
My nice leisurely walking lap came to an end far too soon and I had to force myself to start running once more. I was trying to keep a sustainable pace so I could continue until the end of the gym period, but I think I must have overestimated my ability. Halfway through the lap I was already at my limit. As I was considering slowing down, my head suddenly jerked backwards, and a sharp pain shot across my scalp.
I screamed.
"What the hell?" I shouted as I turned around.
Someone had just grabbed me by the hair while I was running! My loud scream must have startled them because they had immediately let go. The culprit was wearing a dumbfounded expression and standing with their arm still outstretched towards me. He was flanked by two leering boys. The three wore varsity jackets which paired far too well with their smarmy glances they were sending my way. Thanks to Lucas's memories, I knew that these three assholes were all on the same football team as Dan.
I turned to continue my lap and one of them moved to block me. My tired muscles warned me not to try to go through these idiots. Instead, I slowly walked backwards and off the running track. I tried to quickly put some space between them and myself without breaking into a run. They responded by closing in further. They showed no signs of exhaustion from their laps.
"You're not getting away that easily Lucas," the one who pulled my hair said mockingly after recovering his pride.
"We just want to check in and see how you're doing," the leftmost boy said in a similar tone.
"I am not really interested in talking with any of you," I said, forcing the words out. I reached back with one hand, lightly touched my scalp and then quickly glanced at my hand after pulling it back. No blood. At least they had not actually managed to rip anything out.
"We always knew you were a weakling, but this is a new low. I think you could use a little toughening up," the last of the three said.
"Do you think pulling people's hair to get their attention is a tough guy thing? Are you five? Grow up!" I spat.
Those words may have been a mistake because my primary tormentor immediately took a swing at me. Unsure how to dodge I just took a few more steps backward. I tried to pull fighting skills from Aurora's archives, but nothing from there was working my innate muscle memory. To get away from these three I would need to use a skill I had already mastered.
"Stop running away!" the leader shouted after me with his teeth clenched.
"Did you miss the part of football practice where they explained not to hit girls?" I said to the three of them, taking a quick glance at each of their faces.
The one to my right hesitated and I darted towards him as he stared, dumbfounded. He did not even try to stop me until I was long past. His arms reached for me uselessly a second too late, he must have been a bench warmer. I quickly reached the track and sprinted as fast as I could. Running was suddenly not a problem. With a pulse of arcane energy, I pulled a sheet of ice into existence on the track's surface just behind me. It was nothing flashy. It was barely noticeable unless you were looking directly at it. The track ahead of me was clear of students and I took a chance to look backwards. The dunce who had pulled my hair was slipping on the ice and his two friends soon followed suit. The two in back crashed into Tommy and they all tumbled to the ground just as Mr. Winters ran up to them.
There was yelling in the distance, but no one called for me. I was not particularly enthusiastic about listening to their conversation, so I just kept running. After I got to the opposite end of the track I switched to walking; I made sure I took as much time as possible before I made it back around to the teacher. I seriously considered just walking back to the gym or even just going home. As I finally approached the spot of the fight Mr. Winters was already escorting the three back to the school. They passed by me about thirty feet away. The leader of their little bully squad shot me a glare but did not say anything further.
I continued my laps and tried to push the event from my mind. It did not matter, and I had to move past it.
Eventually, after an uncountable, exhausting number of laps the class was finally dismissed by Mr. Winter's shrill whistle. He must have returned at some point, but I had not noticed. My focus was fixed solidly on pushing forward despite the pain in my legs.
As I returned to the gym, I was afflicted with growing apprehension about entering the soon-to-be full womens' locker room. Instead of going in, I just waited outside until I could tell most of the students had left. There were only a few minutes before class officially ended and the buses arrived.
Quickly, I emptied out my gym locker, headed to a stall, and changed back into my dress. I would take a shower after I got home, I figured. I did not want to shower here. I was still afraid. After I checked my dress in the mirrors over the sink I darted out the door. I walked to the busses at as fast of a pace I could manage in my exhausted state. The school was practically empty by the time I stepped through the front doors. I noted that I must have missed the dismissal bell for the last period, but thankfully my bus was still there.
I hesitated. Did I really want to be stuck in a confined space with a bunch of students right now? Sarah and Dan would be there. And Sarah had specifically said she would be willing to fight people for me. I clambered up the steps of the bus which was my only route home and saw a sea of students in bench seats before me. I quickly spotted Dan and Sarah and noticed she had an empty spot next to her, likely reserved for me. I took it.
"So, how was your first day back, Laura?" Sarah asked.
"Not great, to be honest," I said, punctuating my remark with a sigh.
"I heard Tommy and his two dipshit friends got suspended during gym today," Dan said from the adjacent bench.
"He grabbed my hair while we were running laps and took a swing at me, and the other two cut me off when I tried to run away," I mumbled so quietly that only Sarah could hear.
"What?" asked Dan. "Did I miss something? You too cool to tell me stuff now?"
Sarah shot a look at him and shook her head slowly. I looked over at Dan and when our eyes met, he immediately understood. What had happened was clearly written on my face.
"Oh," he said.
"Yeah. It was worse than homeroom," I muttered.
"Are you hurt?" Dan asked, his voice had genuine concern in it. My heart leapt a little, but it was not like Dan would suddenly trust me after this.
"No, I managed to get away from them," I said shakily. "Can we drop this?"
"Of course," Sarah said quickly. "Uh, when is your next game, Dan?"
"Sarah, it's March. Football is a fall sport. We're done for the year." Dan laughed.
"You going to pick up something else to fill the time then?" Sarah asked.
"Nah, I think I'd rather focus on classes and just keep working out," he leaned towards Sarah and me across the bus's walkway and whispered, "We also have our great big spooky problem to deal with."
"Oh, yeah," Sarah said, her expression became serious.
The three of us were silent for a while after that. My thoughts turned to our plans for Friday and how we could figure out what had brought the guardians to us in the first place. Asking Corona and Chromos on a crowded bus did not seem like a good idea. Instead, I decided to go digging in the pile of memories left by Aurora for anything about Thread Creek.
The straightforward facts came first. Aurora was one of the guardians watching us that night. She saw Jordan and the other ghosts and knew that we were getting surrounded by shades. The ghosts that had not yet fully become shades proved, at least according to Aurora, that the shade summoning ritual was recent. Perhaps converting ghosts to shades required further steps? Her memories were silent on that front. It was not a lot to go on.
"We should go back there before sunset next time," I said quietly. "We would have a better chance to actually find something when it is not completely dark out."
"Sounds like a good idea to me," Dan replied. "We should go right after school ends on Friday. We'll leave our bikes at Chris's house the day before, take the bus home with him after school, and pedal out to the creek from there." Dan was staring at the ceiling of the bus in thought.
"The bus driver will just let us get on the wrong bus?" I asked, surprised.
"I've done it before. It's not a big deal," Sarah replied.
The bus came to a stop and Sarah stood up.
"See you both tomorrow," Sarah said as she picked up her backpack.
I let her out of our shared bench seat and she left the bus. Watching her walk to her house, I remembered that my stop was after Dan's on this route. My heart clenched. The walls of the bus were starting to pull inward. Even if the students left me alone, I was risking a panic attack if I stayed here any longer.
"Dan, I can not be alone on this bus right now," I said, glancing around at the students I could see from my bench seat. "I do not want a repeat of gym class."
"I know. Those three aren't on this bus though. No one is going to hurt you."
"Still. I would rather not be alone. Please do not leave me here."
He smiled gently and replied, "We can both go to my house and then my mom can drop you off at home later." The anxiety twisting my gut must have been evident on my face because his reaction surprised me.
"Thanks."
-*-
The two of us stood outside Dan's house and he hesitated before opening the door.
"What are we going to tell my mom?" Dan asked as he turned to me.
"The same thing I told the school, right? It is basically the truth." I answered as my nerves started to creep in again. Dan's little ambush before lunch jumped to the front of my mind. I continued, "You are still stuck on this idea that I am lying to you." I made sure it was not a question.
"Okay. Fine. Always gotta be your way," Dan's reply was clipped. He was not convinced even now.
"Why are you even helping me right now if you think I am lying?" I shot back.
His reply only came after a short silence and was quiet, "I don't know myself. I guess it's because some part of me thinks my friend is still in there somewhere."
"Dan, I am your friend. At least, I want to be," I said sincerely. I choked back a sob.
I knew what he really meant, what he wanted. I was not his real friend, I was not Lucas.
Dan started opening the door and then turned around to face me again.
"Don't talk about magic in front of my parents," Dan said sternly.
"Okay," I said.
Dan finally opened the door and motioned me inside. We went through the foyer and into the living room. On our way past the kitchen and I saw Dan's mom at the stove. I only knew her as Mrs. Smith. She wore a bright red blouse with beige slacks.
"Dan, the stew for dinner should be all set for when your father gets home. I'm leaving it on to simmer," Mrs. Smith said as she poked her head out of the kitchen's other doorway into the family room. She looked at me and blinked a few times in surprise. "Dan, who's your friend?"
"Oh, she's-" he hesitated for a second before giving a name.
"Laura Loranger," I answered for him, cutting off his chance to give an incorrect answer. Earlier he had called me Aurora to my face and some of my classmates had called me Lucas. I was so tired of hearing the wrong name over and over.
"You're Lucas's sister?" Mrs. Smith asked before looking over to Dan with a bemused expression.
"She was wondering if you could drop her off at her house on your way to work," Dan said, barreling over the question.
"Sure, I can do that for you. I'm leaving soon, so don't get too comfortable," she said with a smile.
"Thanks," I said. Dan's mom turned and walked towards the bedrooms. Distantly I heard a door close, so I turned to Dan and asked, "What is your deal today?"
"You mean the chat we had before lunch?"
"Well, yes, but also just now, with your mom. I am Lucas's sister now?"
"Aurora, I said no magic talk," Dan grumbled.
"Not that name again," I groaned. "Please call me Laura. I am not her. I am not Aurora." Energy rapidly drained from my voice. "Maybe you would have been better off with Aurora. I know that too. Instead of a magical warrior empowering your friend, you just have me. And all I have are two sets of memories filled with holes."
Dan looked like he was about to respond, but he said nothing. I hoped that would be the end of it.
"Dan, we are going to need to work together," I said after a full minute of silence.
Dan simply glared at me.
"Fine," I breathed. "I will be outside then. I need some air. Please tell your annoying football pals to stop harassing me."
I walked slowly out the front door and closed it firmly behind me. The early afternoon breeze was cool, but thankfully the temperature was still above freezing. I watched the clouds slowly drift by as I tried to relax after my miserable day. I should have rode the bus the rest of the way home, but I had been scared and afraid of being alone. It felt like not having any of my friends around would be incredibly unsafe. The fact that those three thugs had attacked me in front of the entire class there was so unnerving.
At least the school day was over. Until tomorrow, when I would have to do this entire mess all over again. I just had to make it to Friday. So much was riding on my hope that hunting monsters together would be enough to show everyone that I was still on their side. I took a deep breath and leaned against one of the pillars on the front porch and closed my eyes.
The door swung open, I jumped and let out a yelp.
"Are you okay, Laura?" Dan's mother asked.
"Yeah," I mumbled.
"If you go around to the garage I'll be pulling the car out shortly."
"Thanks," I said. I walked around the corner of the house and waited for the garage to open.
"Your house isn't too far off my route," Mrs. Smith said as I opened the door and climbed in.
"I am glad it is not too much of an inconvenience," I said with a smile. A few minutes into the drive while I watched the scenery roll by outside the passenger window I asked, "Where do you work?"
"The Family Auto Service shop on University," she replied. It explained the navy overalls she had changed into; they were her work clothes, likely a uniform. That road was close to the center of Thread Creek so stopping by the Loranger house first would barely add any time to the trip. "Did Dan say something that upset you?"
Her question surprised me, and I hastily replied, "Uh, I mean sort of? It is not a big deal."
"So, are you and him a thing?" she said slowly.
"Wha—" The partial word escaped my mouth before I broke out into full-on laughter. After I managed to stop laughing I added, "No way. We are just friends."
"At least I hope we will be someday," I added under my breath.
"But you'll take any opportunity to spend a few more minutes with him?" she said with a smirk.
I turned my head away and stared out the window. Of course, it was only natural for her to make some assumptions when a girl started hanging out with her son. I did not want to tell her that I was only here because I was afraid of getting attacked. Faking a crush on Lucas's hunky football player was an easy out for me, a simple explanation. It was normal. It involved no magic of any kind and no mention what had happened to me today.
Dan's mother was a bit smug after "seeing through my scheme", but she did not pester me anymore for the rest of the trip.
"We're here!" she said as she pulled the car to a stop.
I said my thanks and waved as she drove away. With my backpack in tow, I walked up to my house's front door and unlocked it. I knew my father would be stuck at work again. Especially since he had taken the morning off. That evil place loved to encourage their employees to devote all their time and life to that dumb office. I wished he would get a new job.
I sat at the table and began on the night's homework, starting with my reading for English. The novel was a bit of a slog. Being forced to read it for a class had drained any interest I would have had in it. After finishing a few pages, I tossed it aside. This was not due tomorrow. I could not focus on it, so why bother forcing myself? I clicked through a few channels on the television, but nothing really caught my attention. I felt weirdly disconnected from the strange device I had spent so much time watching before I was me. Television was more of a Lucas thing than a me thing, I figured. My eyes wandered around the room in my boredom until I noticed there was a large metal box on the floor next to the table that had not been there before.
I shut the TV off and inspected the box. It appeared to be the safe my father had mentioned on Saturday. I hoped it contained all sorts of information and artifacts from my mother. Well, she was actually Lucas's mother, but it only seemed fair to consider her my mother as well. I was already treating Lenny as my father, after all. They were the parents of my body if nothing else. What was I if not a body with a brain inside which was me and making up all these thoughts anyway? I shook my head to try and rid myself of this awful train of thought.
I needed to see what was inside either way. Maybe it could help my friends and me with our "great big spooky problem". Judging by the box's seams, it looked like the container's top swung upwards to open, but a bulky and surprisingly secure-looking locking mechanism with a keyhole under a spring-loaded cover kept it firmly closed. My father's nightly note on the refrigerator did not mention anything about the safe and the key was nowhere to be found.
I pushed on the box and could barely move it even while straining. It must have been incredibly heavy. Had my father moved this from wherever it was all by himself? I hoped that he had found the key and was as excited to open it as I was. Since the mysterious items the strongbox contained were unavailable to me, I tried to push it out of my mind and instead distracted myself with more homework, a bit of television, and reheating food from the refrigerator for dinner.
My father was still not home by the time I went to sleep.