And 2B had sent three photos…
there was a message too, but first I got seriously stuck on the photos.
First photo — she’s taking a picture of herself, dressed…
or, better put, undressed?
In a red bikini.
I nearly drooled all over myself.
And something else of mine stood up too…
and not just a question, yeah.
Though there was a question too — why was this done?
I mean, why did she dress up like that and send it to me?
Second photo — her again, in white lace lingerie.
My brain gave me the blue screen of death.
And also…
I should definitely go take an ice-cold shower…
or go to the bathroom, depending on which thought wins out.
Third photo — black lace, with stockings and garters (or whatever those are called, I never really looked into it before).
That was a strike.
After those three photos, it took me a good while to even crawl my way to the text message, and even once I got there, I kept glancing back up more than once.
” Master, which one do you think I should choose?
” — is this a daydream, or did I actually die and end up in heaven?
” Why didn’t you choose yourself, and why are you asking me?
” — there had to be a catch somewhere in this, and I was going to find it.
The answer arrived almost instantly.
Is she really typing this out, or did she hack the phone with some trick of hers and is inputting the message via some kind of Bluetooth telepathy?
” Functionally, I see no difference; there are no protective properties, and none causes discomfort.
The store’s sales manager advised me to bring this question to you.
Taking into account your glances these past two days, I concluded this was good advice.
” — Damn it!
I was wrong to think 2B doesn’t notice anything, she apparently just doesn’t care how often I side-eye her or what kind of looks I throw her way.
On the other hand…
no repercussions for staring at her, and she’s letting me choose on a matter like this …
she’s perfect!
Screw it, no need to socialize her, I love her logic!
Now the question is…
what should I pick?
Pfft, what a dumb question!
” 2B, get all three.
And don’t forget the outerwear — pick out something casual.
Yeah, this clothing won’t have any protective properties, but that’s not really its job — its job is to not draw attention to you, unlike your current outfit…
And also, yes, you’re perfect ,” I didn’t bother holding myself back, since I honestly couldn’t choose, and where was there even a choice to make?
While I was at it, I also explained to Yorha why she needed casual clothes — sure, her uniform wasn’t exactly eye-catching, but it definitely stood out from what people wear in my country.
Better to buy something less conspicuous, just to be safe.
At the end, I couldn’t help myself and wrote out what I actually thought.
It just…
felt right to write that.
She really had made my day, after all, and if my praise brought her even a little bit of pleasure, then why not?
Somehow…
having missed the chance to say so much to my own parents, I decided not to hold back on moments like this anymore, not to put it off for later, to just say out loud whatever seemed obvious to me, since it might not be at all obvious to the person I’m talking to — my tongue’s not going to fall off, and it’ll make him or her happy.
” I do not know what prompted the last part of your message, but I find there is something calming about it ” — calming, huh?
Fine by me, at least it’s not rejection.
And honestly, she suits me completely, exactly the way she is.
Good…
after that little addendum, I feel, I don’t know, kind of uplifted?
Let’s get back to work with renewed energy, no way I’m letting a mood like this go to waste!
The moment I thought that, a crash rang out from the street.
And then again.
And again.
“What in the hell?
Are they seriously redoing the road during the holidays?
Do these people have any shame at all?
I’m trying to work here!” my eye twitched, after which headphones got clamped over my ears, music got cranked up — which didn’t come anywhere close to fully drowning out the construction noise or whatever it was — and I tried to keep going with adjusting the bids for each ad campaign.
But no such luck!
The sounds definitely got louder and more frequent, and then…
I heard something strange.
“Please tell me I did not just hear gunshots?” The first feeling that hit me was fear…
but unlike that hateful fear back in the alley, sticky and suffocating, dragging out the absolute worst that had been hiding inside me, this was an entirely different kind of fear, if only because what dominated it wasn’t concern for my own life (though I won’t deny that was part of it too!), but concern for 2B.
What if she was on her way back home with the shopping and had run into yet another gang skirmish?
And at that moment it didn’t even occur to me that, given the timing of our text exchange, even if she’d rushed straight toward my house, she’d still have another thirty minutes of travel ahead of her.
Maybe less, given her actual speed, but definitely more than the two minutes it took for all of this to start!
I get up from my chair, gladly noting that, if push comes to shove, I’ll be able to…
run for it (or fight, depending on circumstances, but for now I can survive most of this world’s threats mainly by actively hauling ass!), since I’d already fully recovered from my training, aside from a slight stiffness in my overworked muscles, which, if it comes down to it, could still put out maybe not maximum, but a decent chunk of energy — enough for a dozen serious attacks.
Or a few dozen barely-charged ones, so to speak, basically just ordinary physical hits with a bit of extra oomph behind them.
Quickly making it to the door (though I really should’ve gone for the second-floor windows…
okay, learning to keep your head straight in stressful situations is apparently a trainable skill, same as reacting to them a bit less dramatically) and throwing it open, I could see two hulking brutes and a woman’s figure moving between them.
Looking closer, I let out a relieved, if somewhat cowardly, sigh — it’s not Yorha, the red hair makes that pretty clear, as does the girl’s figure, which, while smoking hot, was definitely not on quite the same scale.
Hm…
looks like that’s Black Widow?
And that guy in the 1930s gangster suit, who’d just calmly taken one of the Widow’s bullets straight to the forehead, must be Sledgehammer…
or whatever his actual name was?
And then there was an even bigger brute in an outfit that looked sturdy even from a distance, reminiscent of a rhino, mostly thanks to the massive horn on his head, who’d just swung and missed the nimble girl, punching (the bastard!) straight through my stone fence instead, and, without missing a beat, snapping off a chunk of it and hurling it at Sledgehammer (until I remember another name or nickname, he’s staying Sledgehammer)…
my fence!
Sledgehammer responded with a move not every karate master could pull off — he smashed the chunk of stone fence flying at him with his own head.
Strong dude!
And right now these two villains — super villains, I’d wager, quite literally — while trading blows with each other, were mostly ganging up on the girl, who, despite pulling off some genuinely impressive feats of flexibility and acrobatics, was clearly not on their level, looking especially fragile next to Rhino…
seriously, that hulking mass of a guy was even bigger than me, despite all the “growth-hormone booster shots” I’d gotten from card assimilation!
And none of the three had noticed me.
So I could quite cravenly just close the door behind me right now and pretend I’d seen nothing.
Except…
then what had all that training been for, the risk of losing myself, the assimilations?
So I could go crawl back into my shell like a coward again?
Anger at myself started rising inside me, and I also felt the flow of life energy inside me speed up.
Well then, let’s find out if this method can bump the percentage up a bit more!
A dash forward, clearing the fence in three moves, and in a jump (a good, solid one, too — thanks, Kagami, for the jumping, and thanks, Ax-Man, for the body-enhancement skills, weak as they still are before full assimilation), I managed to whip out a spin kick, planting “Uzumaki Jo-Lan” square in Rhino’s jaw — a spinning back kick charged with energy which, applied correctly, can be turned into a long-range attack, practically launching a slash straight off your leg, but so far I’ve only figured out the powerful close-range variant.
“What the—?” burst out of the two other participants in this scene, out of sync but entirely genuine.
“Ha!
Look who crawled out on his own!” came the rather strange remark from Rhino, his head rocking slightly as he took a half-step back.
But I had no time to analyze anybody’s remarks right now — I needed to find some way to break through this mountain of a man, or he’d flatten me with his very first hit; I’m no superhuman, after all, and taking a blow from someone who a powerful Jo-Lan technique had only managed to stagger could well be lethal for me!
What’s more, I’d clearly bruised my own leg on this bastard’s hide!
Which was definitely going to affect the one single aspect where I might actually have the edge over him.
Yeah, mobility.
I clench my hand into a fist, concentrating energy into it, and drive a straight punch into the torso of the grinning, already-swinging Rhino.
“Jo-Lan Rusiken!” — at the full power currently available to me.
Unfortunately, I still can’t get away from shouting the technique names out loud; we’ll see how that changes after full assimilation…
whenever it actually happens.
If I remember canon correctly, a fully powered-up Axel could level several people standing in front of him at once with this move.
Well then…
I’ve still got a long, long way to go before reaching that level.
This isn’t just about assimilation — I need to build up my reserve too.
All I managed to do was push Rhino back a little, which was enough to make his swing miss me, though the shockwave of air still hit me.
After which he had to hastily shield his eyes from the Widow, who’d started firing at him aggressively — no doubt to protect a simple civilian.
Except that left her own guard down, which Sledgehammer took advantage of, landing a classic one-two combo to her midsection (thanks to my own personal boxing lessons for recognizing that).
But even so, the SHIELD agent showed the difference between a professional and an ordinary person, managing, without ever stopping her firing, to dodge the first hit and skillfully deflect the second…
which left her completely exposed to a headbutt from the gangster, landing dangerously close to her temple, after which she got a bit “woozy.” Not that I was surprised — taking a hit from that exact head, one that stops bullets and shatters stone, and just getting “woozy” instead of dropping like a corpse…
is she really just a regular human?
I close the distance on Sledgehammer, leaving a growling, displeased Rhino behind me, and try to overwhelm him with a rush of speed, at least.
All my quick strikes get met with hard blocks, somewhat resembling the way boxers guard against hits, and my last attack nearly gets caught in a grapple, but by yanking my arm back sharply, I not only slip out of the hold, I also lean my torso back, which turns the kick I’m already throwing — already boosted by life energy — into something genuinely gorgeous.
The gangster grunts and goes flying backward…
straight into Natasha Romanoff, the very person I was trying to protect.
Awkward.
Though, fine, this is literally my first fight ever in my whole life!
So it’s all good, pretty solid for a first attempt, honestly!
Credit where it’s due — the girl, ending up pinned under the gangster now lying back-first on top of her, didn’t lose her composure for even a second despite her earlier injury, and quickly locked him into a chokehold.
I switch my gaze to the mountain of muscle that is Rhino, now charging me, and…
no, I don’t meet him head-on, even though the temptation was there to take him on with my strongest technique, and it probably would’ve done some damage this time, at least thanks to the penetrating properties of Jo-Lan Chuubasu.
But…
yeah, colliding with a mass like that would break every bone in my body!
I didn’t even risk a leg sweep, afraid of snapping my own leg.
Just a jumping dodge, followed by a whip-crack kick to his back, the kind Axel was so fond of, which had absolutely no effect on my opponent, except to make him even angrier.
His hulking mass started turning back toward me, and catching the moment, I close the distance, my hands drawing back, one palm positioned lower than the other and turned in the opposite direction.
Then both hands thrust forward, releasing a wave of energy capable of hurling a person quite a considerable distance, blowing steel doors off their hinges, crumbling stone, and even wrecking machinery.
“Jo-Lan Chuubasu!” In my case, the energy passed straight through Rhino’s body and burst out the other side in perfectly visible gusts of wind.
That giant of a man finally staggered and dropped to one knee, breathing hard and spitting blood.
But even so, the brute, glaring at me with murder in his eyes, started getting back up.
Though he immediately swayed and dropped right back onto that knee.
“I wouldn’t recommend continuing this fight.
Unlike my previous techniques, this one has penetrating properties.
It might not have torn up your hide, but you should have a fair amount of internal damage right about now,” I warned him.
Honestly, I didn’t want him to stubbornly drive himself into serious complications, or even death…
I definitely don’t feel ready to take anyone’s life.
Not even a criminal’s.