For as long as I could remember people called me Roland.
There was nothing more or less about it, if anything the name was fact.
My parents passed before I was able to remember, my life went to ruins that day…
*****
A stormy night with rain and clouds brewing high above.
A screaming baby, and a lone grandfather holding the disgrace that was his grandchild.
The baby screamed and screamed, helplessly bare to the rain, shriving from the cold that overtook the baby’s body, with a sight the grandfather placed the child down in the rainy ground mud and water covered him in an instant.
Then the grandfather left, without the child, never to be known again.
It felt like time had passed, but the child didn’t know about such, the baby just cried and cried, helpless to the cold rain and mud.
Then almost like an angel appeared a woman with yellow hair came by the baby and picked him up as her own..
She was caring and kind, nice and sweet, so when The baby came into her life she had to help.
For a few years the baby grew up, he started to walk, he started to talk, he started to become someone.
His name was given by the kind lady who was his new mother, he never knew his original name and he never knew his original parents, but he was happy to be this ‘Roland’ and fill the role completely.
His name was derived from how he had been rolling in the mud, he had been rolling in the land per say, thus roll-land morphed into Roland.
He was helpful and kind, just like his new mother had taught him to be, he was a happy child who had been given this second chance…
*****
That was my life until she died, I still remember her voice, her lonely gravestone, But I cannot remember her face.
That day was awful, beyond anything I had felt before, why did someone so kind need to die, god?
Why couldn’t she live, My mother was my hope, my reason, my life, and you had her taken her away from me!
****
It was a bright day, this time the angel wouldn’t appear, as Roland’s new mother, his only mother, had died.
Roland was just in his teenage years, but he didn’t deserve something like this, well did he deserve anything?
It was his life, but she had saved him, she had helped him, now how was he going to repay her now?
His grip on three long white lily daisy flowers tightened, the sun had
Getting down on his knees he looked to the gravestone, his hope his sunshine his star, she had fallen down into death’s embrace.
Nothing he could do would bring her back, many of the villagers gathered around, but not to moron the death of his mother, but rather to whispers about who had to take him in next.
“I hear he was abandoned..”
“He might be violent now.”
“Worse he might be cursed to bring death..”
His grip tightened further, why was his only gift from god failing him?
Why did he hear the whispers against him?
“I don’t want him at all..”
“Yeah, he is to unstable.”
“He might even become a thief if we don’t take him..”
“Hwg, where is he going? What is he going to do?”
Roland didn’t care anymore, he wasn’t going to live with anyone, not even himself.
****
That’s where my path started, my hatred, my beginning.
I disobeyed Mother just for a worse life?
Why didn’t I stay, why did I have to fall down this path?
***
This day was hot and shady, Roland had been living in the jungle for some time, some might say he lost his humanity, but he never gained it to begin with.
His eyes dart over, it was a man, a man in nice cloths, Roland had been deep within the jungle, and deep inside a cave at that.
But yet a man graced by society had been here within Roland’s cave, the man spoke as he neared Roland;
“Come, come with me, I can help you, I can feed you, but I need you, I need your strength and wit and courage nevertheless.”
Despite Roland having not spoken for quite some time, he understood the man, and he understood the man’s strength.
Roland was covered by leafs, his entire life was striped of life, his mother, him being born, everything had been empty, nothing he ever did or feel felt like life.
His only life was his mother, “Do you want to join me? What’s your name?”
The man said, without even thinking Roland reached his hand out, was this really the angel?
Had he come back to bless him yet again?
Just like the day he met his mother?
***
That stupid field, that stupid chance, that stupid decision…
I was left for waste, he taught me everything there…
From how to eat, to how to behave, to how to act, everything he and Tiffen taught me.
**
“You really think that will hurt someone?” The man spoke, he was the boss to Roland, but Roland could barely remember his face so he only had a blurred face; “Roland, there is two ways of attacking, either you give it your all, or you plan before, you have done neither yet..”
Roland was in a field, it was lush, stretching to the horizon and back, the voice of nature took form in crickets and wind.
Roland looked to the clouds, he watched then slip and fade, he lied down on his back, “Am, I, Alive?” Roland asked aloud.
After seeing just how much life brimmed around him he really questioned it, he breathed in slowly, saving the feeling of this so called life.
For the first time since his mothers death, the world opened up, the grass grew brighter, the man sat down beside Roland; “Of course you are, after all you have us.” He looked up at the man who sat beside him, and Tiffen the maid who was walking closer with a tray of tea perched upon it.
“I have a job for the both of you..” The man said, the atmosphere grew grim, Tiffen sat down dishing out small tea cups to them, her face was locked as the man spoke, Roland also sat upright.
“There is a tree, a massive tree just around here, it has a library, one bigger then anything you have seen before. Inside is said to contain documents that date far into the past, I need to find something out… I know this mission is grim, and will be long, but I want the two of you to settle down live life a little, you know?”
The man looked up the the many clouds, Tiffen blushed slightly and Roland was also against this idea; “What do you mean ‘live a little’! This better not be one of your pranks again…”
The man looked over at Roland, his face was angry at his defiance; “I found both of you, bottom of the barrel, Now I Ask Of Your Strength, I Need The Knowledge.”
Roland gulped, it had been true this man had raised them and was now asking for something, something they would spend a long time doing and collecting.
It was a big ask, but Roland thought for a moment, was this his chance?
The angel who was his mother,
The angel who was his master,
Roland had been given the chance to repay them for everything.
**
I wish I killed him there;
*
Roland stood up, he raised his hands at the man, one spell, it would have killed him, it would have ended him, along side Tiffen helping they could of killed the man and not had to pay they debt.
But like his mother, Roland let his hand fall to his side, he was to weak to be set free, he needed to repay the man.
Even if he was offering a life without him, just for some info.