It was an ordinary Thursday afternoon. In the library, by the window, the sunlight was just right.
Xia Yaojin had just solved a topology problem that had plagued her for three days. She closed her book with a satisfied mood. Looking up, she saw Zhu Yawen across from her, resting her chin on her hand and watching her with a gaze so tender it could melt.
“Why have you been looking at me like that lately?” Xia Yaojin asked suddenly, her tone as calm as if she were asking about a math problem.
Zhu Yawen froze for a moment, then smiled. “Because you’re beautiful.”
“There are many beautiful people,” Xia Yaojin said. “But you only look at me this way.”
When she spoke, there was no hint of flirtation; she was simply stating an observed objective fact.
Zhu Yawen’s smile faded slightly. “Because… I like you.”
She had said these words many times, but every time she said them, they were laced with caution.
Xia Yaojin nodded, signaling she understood, as if she had just learned a mundane fact like “it will rain today.”
Then, she asked a question that caught Zhu Yawen completely off guard:
“Are you sure you’re gay?”
The air solidified.
Zhu Yawen opened her mouth, but found her mind a total blank.
Was she sure?
She had never actually thought about that question.
In her past life, she had loved Gu Mingyuan with a passion that bordered on life and death, that was heterosexuality.
In this life, she loathed Gu Mingyuan, loathed him so much that the mere thought of his touch made her sick that was a rejection of the opposite sex.
But what about others?
What about other men?
What about other women?
She only knew that the moment Xia Yaojin walked into her line of sight, her eyes could never look away again.
That desire to be close, to understand, and to protect was so intense it had driven her to abandon her familiar world of art to gnaw on grueling mathematical formulas.
But was this “liking girls,” or “liking Xia Yaojin”?
She couldn’t tell the difference.
“I…” Zhu Yawen spoke with difficulty, “I don’t know.”
Xia Yaojin nodded, as if she had received a satisfactory answer. “Then you should figure that out first.”
She reopened her book and began the next chapter, as if the conversation had been nothing more than a brief interlude in an academic discussion.
But Zhu Yawen’s world had been turned upside down by that single question.
On the school forum, news leaked from an unknown source had already left the “shippers” heartbroken.
【URGENT! Jinjin asked Wenwen: Are you sure you’re gay? Wenwen replied: I don’t know!】
OP (The informant hiding behind the bookshelf): Sisters… I heard something I shouldn’t have. Jinjin asked Wenwen if she was really gay, and Wenwen said… she didn’t know. That tone… that expression… she wasn’t lying. So… Wenwen might not actually like girls? She might just… like Jinjin as a person? What… what is going on!
1L (Shipper A): No….I don’t believe it!
2L (Psychology Dept. Observer): Analyzing from sexual identity theory, “situational same-sex attraction” does exist, where an individual is usually attracted to the opposite sex but develops feelings for a specific person of the same sex under specific circumstances. Zhu Yawen’s case might fall into this category.
3L (Foreign Languages Dept. Fanfic Writer): Then… is our ship still sailing?
4L (Fine Arts Dept. Student): I’m from the Arts Department. Actually, we all used to think Wenwen liked guys. When she was with Gu Mingyuan, she seemed truly in love. I don’t know what she went through, but she’s utterly disgusted by him now. However, I haven’t seen her like any other girls either… except for Jinjin.
5L (Frontline Reporter): Breaking news! Wenwen has left the library! She’s walking alone! She looks completely dazed!
6L (The entire fandom): It’s over, it’s over… is the “Bad Ending” coming?
Zhu Yawen walked alone through the campus, aimless.
Xia Yaojin’s question was like a seed that had taken root in her heart, growing into a massive tree she could no longer ignore.
Who was she, really?
What did she like?
Since her rebirth, she had been busy seeking revenge on Gu Mingyuan, busy reclaiming control of her family, and busy getting close to Xia Yaojin. She had never stopped to ask herself: Zhu Yawen, what do you want?
Her phone vibrated. It was a message from Ji Minmin: “I heard you got stunned by the Academic Queen’s question? Want to talk?”
Zhu Yawen replied: “Okay.”
The two met in a corner of the campus cafe.
Ji Minmin looked at Zhu Yawen’s pale face and sighed. “So, you’re really not sure?”
“I don’t know.” Zhu Yawen rubbed her temples. “In the past, I loved Gu Mingyuan so much I could forgive him for anything. Now, I just hate him enough to destroy everything he has. But as for other men… I don’t seem to feel anything.”
“And women?”
“Nothing either.” Zhu Yawen paused. “Except for Yaojin.”
Ji Minmin was silent for a moment. “So you don’t like ‘girls,’ you like ‘Xia Yaojin.'”
“Is there a difference?”
“There is,” Ji Minmin said seriously. “If you like girls, then Xia Yaojin is just the first girl you like, there might be a second or a third later. But if you only like Xia Yaojin, then regardless of her gender, she is the only person you will ever like.”
Zhu Yawen was stunned. That logic… seemed to make sense.
“Furthermore,” Ji Minmin continued, “the reason you liked Gu Mingyuan before might not have been because you liked ‘men,’ but because… at that time, you needed someone like that to love. You needed to be loved and noticed, and Gu Mingyuan just happened to appear.”
She looked at Zhu Yawen. “I don’t know what happened to you, but you’ve changed. You no longer need others to define your value, you’ve found your own strength. The Xia Yaojin who appeared now didn’t attract you because of her gender, but because of who she is, her focus, her purity, and the way she treats the world.”
Zhu Yawen listened quietly, the fog in her heart slowly dissipating.
“So,” she whispered, “I’m not ‘gay,’ and I’m not exactly ‘straight.’ I just… like Yaojin.”
“Exactly,” Ji Minmin nodded. “You are ‘Xia Yaojin sexual.'”
The phrasing made Zhu Yawen laugh, though as she laughed, her eyes turned a bit red.
“But what if…” her voice trembled, “what if Yaojin only ever sees me as a friend?”
“Then you be her friend,” Ji Minmin said. “At least in this process, you found your true self.”
“Is this not more important than love?”
In the library, Xia Yaojin received a screenshot from Zhou Xiaoyu, the heart-wrenching post from the forum.
After reading it, she frowned slightly and sent a message to Zhu Yawen: “Where are you?”
The reply came quickly: “At the cafe. With Minmin.”
“Do you need me to come over?”
“No need. I’ll be fine soon.”
Xia Yaojin looked at the phone screen, thought for a moment, and sent another message: “About that question. I didn’t mean anything by it. I just feel that one should understand oneself first before deciding how to treat others.”
This time, the reply arrived a bit slower: “I know. Thank you for asking that, it helped me figure some things out.”
Xia Yaojin put down her phone and reopened her book, but today, for a rare change, she couldn’t focus.
She thought of Zhu Yawen’s concentration when studying math, the passion she showed while painting The Poem of Algorithms, and the gentle light in her eyes every time she looked at her.
Those moments made her feel… warm.
She didn’t know if that was “love.” She only knew that when Zhu Yawen was around, her world felt a little brighter.
The phone vibrated again.
Zhu Yawen: “I’ve figured it out. I’m not gay, and I’m not straight. I just like you. No matter what your gender is, I would like you.”
Xia Yaojin stared at the message for a long time.
Then she replied: “Mhm. Noted.”
No promises, no direct reciprocation. Just “noted.”
But Zhu Yawen was satisfied. At the very least, she was no longer lost.
On the forum, a new thread appeared.
【Latest Update! Wenwen figured it out! She is ‘Xia Yaojin sexual’!】
OP (Cafe Informant): Sisters! A plot twist! I just overheard Wenwen’s conversation with her friend at the cafe! Wenwen said she doesn’t like girls or boys specifically, she just likes Jinjin as a person! No matter what gender Jinjin is, she’d love her! Isn’t this… isn’t this an even deeper kind of love?! This isn’t a Bad Ending! This is a different form of a Happy Ending!
1L (Resurrected Shipper): Ahhhh I knew it! Wen Jin is real!
2L (Psychology Dept. Observer): From the perspective of love theory, this belongs to “target specific attraction,” which indeed exists on the sexual orientation spectrum. Moreover, this kind of feeling is often more profound and personalized than generalized orientation based attraction.
3L (Foreign Languages Dept. Fanfic Writer): New inspiration! The Heart’s Direction: I Only Move for You!
4L (Fine Arts Dept. Student): So Wenwen hasn’t betrayed art, nor has she betrayed herself. She simply… found that one unique person.
5L (Frontline Reporter): Latest news! Jinjin replied to Wenwen! Although it was only two words (“Noted”), Wenwen looks very satisfied!
6L (All Shippers): I’m shipping it so hard! This “Only For You” trope is even better!
In the evening, Zhu Yawen returned to the library and sat down across from Xia Yaojin.
The two shared a glance. Nothing was said, but the subtle awkwardness in the air had vanished.
“Still studying math?” Xia Yaojin asked.
“Yes,” Zhu Yawen nodded. “But I want to draw for a bit first. My hands are itching to create.”
“Okay.”
Xia Yaojin continued with her topology, while Zhu Yawen took out her sketchbook and began to draw her perceptions of the day.
She drew the lights of the cafe, the expression on Ji Minmin’s face while talking, and the journey from confusion to clarity within her own heart.
Finally, she sketched Xia Yaojin’s profile, focused, calm and so beautiful she seemed unreal.
When she finished, she wrote a small line of text next to the drawing:
“I do not love a gender. I love only you.”
When Xia Yaojin looked up, she happened to see those words.
She looked at the drawing, then back at Zhu Yawen, and said: “The drawing is good. However, my nose bridge should be about 0.3 cm higher, you drew it a bit too flat.”
Zhu Yawen: “…”
She laughed, laughing until tears almost came to her eyes.
This was her Yaojin. Forever rational, forever direct, and forever… the one who made her heart race.
“Alright, I’ll fix it,” she said, picking up her eraser.
Xia Yaojin nodded with satisfaction and lowered her head to read again.
Outside the window, the sun was setting.
Two girls, one diving into a sea of books, the other recording time with a brush.
Perhaps their relationship could never be defined by a simple label. But what did it matter?
They had found each other. And they had found their truest selves.
On the forum, the fanfiction had already been updated to a new chapter. But in reality, the story was just beginning.
No labels, no definitions. Only two souls finding each other’s warmth in the vast sea of people.
That was enough. Quite enough.