The two of them arranged to meet at a cafe.
A cafe was only suitable for brief conversations. Back then, when Jiang Minyu had chosen a cafe as the place to break up, it had been for precisely that reason. Now, however, he wanted a long talk and yet could not have one, only by choosing a cafe could he manage to coax Ran Fan out to meet him.
Jiang Minyu arrived first. He made no attempt at disguise. On the contrary, he had deliberately made himself look striking, his clothes neat and immaculate, his hair freshly styled.
The glass window reflected his face and he looked like a model displayed in a shop window, surrounded by flowers. Every passerby could not help but lift their head, sincerely praising how beautiful he was.
He wondered how Ran Fan would see him.
Jiang Minyu felt nervous.
When the agreed time arrived, Jiang Minyu waited with an almost aching intensity and at last, Ran Fan appeared.
Winter had truly arrived now and the weather was growing colder by the day. Ran Fan wore a light colored down jacket and a camel toned cashmere scarf wrapped around his neck. His complexion was slightly pale from the cold yet his cheeks were still soft and full, showing no sign of having grown thinner.
He looked gentle and clean, warm and calm.
More importantly, he looked as though he was living well, living well without Jiang Minyu.
Jiang Minyu hoped that he was doing well yet the fear in his heart could not be restrained, spreading wildly like vines and weeds along the edge of a cliff.
“You’re here.”
He did not know how flustered his voice sounded. “Sit down. It’s cold, isn’t it? Did you come by car?”
“What would you like to drink? I’ll order you a cup of hot coffee.”
Ran Fan did not respond. He did not remove his scarf either. After sitting down, he simply sat there, still and quiet.
Jiang Minyu kept waiting for Ran Fan to look at him. When their gazes finally met, it was Jiang Minyu who could not endure it first and hurriedly looked away, calling out, “Waiter, two cups of hot coffee.”
These days, everyone ordered by scanning a code but Jiang Minyu’s identity and appearance granted him certain privileges. The staff member nodded from afar without hesitation.
While they waited, Jiang Minyu spoke in a soft, rambling stream.
“Fanfan ge, I looked for you for so long.”
“You haven’t been online on your apps and your media accounts haven’t been updated for months. I was so worried that something might have happened to you.”
Ran Fan spoke then, calling his name. His tone was calm and gentle yet carried an unmistakable sense of distance. “Minyu, if there’s something you want to say, just say it directly.”
Jiang Minyu froze.
After a long while, his gaze slowly lifted and settled on Ran Fan’s eyes.
“Fanfan ge, have you been following my news lately?”
“I broke up with all of those people. I was in a car accident and after that, all of my relationships ended. Recently, I’ve been alone.”
Ran Fan seemed unable to discern what he was trying to say and remained silent.
Jiang Minyu had originally planned to take things slowly. He had always been someone who prided himself on his strength and dignity but looking at the Ran Fan before him, he truly could not hold back any longer. He was afraid, afraid of losing him, afraid of not being able to hold onto him.
“Fanfan ge.”
He always knew that this was the form of address most likely to soften Ran Fan’s heart when he showed weakness.
“I’ve thought it through. I don’t know what was wrong with me before, I lost my head. I never needed anyone else in the first place. I shouldn’t have had any entanglements with them.”
“I don’t want anyone else. I want you. Only you.”
“I love you.”
Love was the most terrifying and most bewitching curse in this world. When someone finally spoke that word aloud, it was as though they had broken through the most difficult barrier imaginable.
Jiang Minyu no longer felt it hard to speak. All the feelings he had suppressed poured out in a rush.
“The Li family called me back because of the heir issue. Now that person doesn’t know who he’s had another child with. Even if I leave, the Li family’s business will still have someone to inherit it.”
“The two of us were always together. We were meant to stay together.”
“Do you remember? We promised each other that we would never separate, for an entire lifetime. I was truly muddle headed and blinded, to forget something so important.”
“Fanfan ge, I know I was wrong. I realize it now.”
As he spoke, his nose grew more and more sore.
Jiang Minyu waited anxiously for Ran Fan’s reply. A long time passed without any response and he looked over in confusion,
At some point, Ran Fan had turned his head and was gazing out the window.
Scattered snowflakes drifted down from the sky. There was not yet any snow accumulated on the ground but people’s shoulders and the palms of their raised hands were already dusted with white.
It was snowing. If one were standing outside at this moment, they would certainly be able to feel the icy chill of the falling snow.
Ran Fan unconsciously stroked the belly beneath his down jacket, now beginning to show and thought:
What is Li Yang doing right now?
“Fanfan… Fanfan?”
The voice at his ear kept calling. Ran Fan was pulled back to himself and looked again at Jiang Minyu. “Sorry. What did you just say?”
Jiang Minyu’s face twisted with pain. Every word seemed to be squeezed out with blood and breath. “I want to get back together with you.”
Get back together… so it really was about reconciliation.
Ran Fan fell silent for a very, very brief moment, then said, “I can’t do that.”
Jiang Minyu pleaded desperately. “It was my fault. I hurt you. It’s only right that you don’t forgive me. I’m not asking you to forgive me right away. I just want you to know that I know I was wrong, that I deeply, deeply regret everything I did.”
“I haven’t forgotten our past. It’s just that I wasn’t doing well back then. I always felt the world owed me something, so I wanted to retaliate, to strike back at something. It wasn’t retaliation against you, I just, just…”
He couldn’t explain it clearly. His words jammed in his throat, stuttering halfway through, his eyes growing wet with anxiety.
“I never wanted to hurt you. I’ve always known you were the person in this world who treated me the best.”
“I was dazzled by a new world. This is a trial so many people can’t escape. Once you leave your old life behind, you lose yourself. Maybe some people think I’m just making excuses but in truth they’ve simply never reached this point. If there were really a chance to change one’s social class, everyone would lose themselves. That’s human nat- ”
Ran Fan suddenly cut him off. “I wouldn’t.”
In that instant, just that instant, Jiang Minyu was rendered speechless.
All language became unbearably weak at that moment.
His tears fell in the silence, like a drop of dew sliding from a flower petal.
There was no way to refute it, because it couldn’t be refuted.
Ran Fan wouldn’t. That was a stronger rebuttal than anger or accusation.
With a trembling sob in his voice, a sob filled with fear, a kind of fear he hadn’t even had on the night his mother died, Jiang Minyu asked, “Fanfan ge… you already hate me, don’t you?”
The only answer was silence.
In that silence, Ran Fan looked at him as though separated by mountains, by rivers, by layers upon layers of mist.
“I don’t hate you, Minyu.”
“I loved you. Even now, I don’t feel that this love has changed. You are a precious treasure in my life.”
“I’m grateful that you loved me. I never told you this before but being loved by you truly felt wonderful. The years when you loved me are memories I will never forget. It’s just that… now, when I open my eyes, when I eat, when I see cats and dogs, flowers and grass, those ordinary, mundane moments, I don’t think of you anymore.”
Ran Fan said, “I still love you but I no longer think of you.”
Jiang Minyu’s lips moved slightly. He seemed frozen, unable to make a sound.
At that moment, Ran Fan scanned the code and paid the bill. Then he looked at Jiang Minyu and said, “I came today not only to hear what you had to say. There’s something else I need to tell you.”
“I think it’s better that you hear this from me, rather than from someone else.”
Jiang Minyu stood there in a daze, as if his soul had been forcibly ripped out through the top of his head. The pain was unbearable.
He hadn’t known that a person could feel pain this intense.
In that pain, he heard Ran Fan say, “I’m pregnant. I’m currently twenty six weeks along. The doctor says the fetus is developing very quickly and it may be born in another two months.”
“What?” Jiang Minyu asked.
“About two months until birth.”
“No, no, that’s not what I mean…” Jiang Minyu’s voice shook. “You’re a man. Everyone knows men can’t get pregnant.”
“I’m a little special,” Ran Fan said.
This really was a joke that wasn’t funny at all. Jiang Minyu could hardly tell whether he was truly asking a question anymore. Stunned, he asked blankly, “…Then we were together for so long, why didn’t you get pregnant?”
What he didn’t expect was that Ran Fan actually answered him.
“Maybe because we always used protection.”
So what did that mean?
That Ran Fan hadn’t used protection with someone else?
Who was that “someone else”? He had another person? And twenty six weeks, didn’t that mean he became pregnant not long after they broke up?
And in the end, how could a man possibly get pregnant?
Jiang Minyu felt an overwhelming sense of absurdity.
An absurdity so profound it defied language.
Yet Ran Fan still wasn’t finished speaking. He continued calmly, “You know the child’s father as well. It’s Li Yang.”
Jiang Minyu felt his breath catch.
“We’ve decided to get married.”
✦ ✧ ✦
Fleurveil
[Translator]
☕ A LITTLE SOMETHING FOR THE TRANSLATOR
☕ (•̀ᴗ•́)و ̑̑ translator fuel acquired?
☕ BUY THEM A COFFEE →
✧ (づ｡•ㅅ•｡)づ ☕ ✧
✦ thank you for reading ✦
← PreviousNext →
ChaptersChapter 1 · Let’s break upChapter 2 · A hand landed on Ran Fan’s backChapter 3 · Jiang Wenyu’s biological fatherChapter 4 · Li Yang kissed him againChapter 5 · Could you come to the hospital?Chapter 6 · I hope you can give birthChapter 7 · Are you bothered by the fact that I am Jiang Wenyu’s biological father?Chapter 8 · Don’t you think I’m ordinary?Chapter 9 · Don’t consider it me going back on my wordChapter 10 · You are a truly remarkable personChapter 11 · Would you say you’re cold-hearted towards Ran Fan?Chapter 12 · Dr. Ran resigned several months ago.Chapter 13 · Can we meet up?Chapter 14 · You also know the child’s fatherChapter 15 · You are the most important to meChapter 16 · Extra 1Chapter 17 · Extra 2Chapter 18 · Extra 3