The room remained silent for exactly one heartbeat.
Then, it erupted.
The initial tension shattered into a roar of cackling, hooting, and unabashed laughter.
A student in the back row let out a high-pitched wheeze that sounded like a deflating balloon, while others doubled over, slapping their desks in delight.
Even Halloway looked like he was vibrating, his shoulders shaking as he let out a dry, rasping cackle that echoed off the high ceiling.
Halloway didn’t just laugh; he cackled, a dry, wheezing sound like sandpaper rubbing against a chalkboard.
He stood up, his robes swishing as he descended the stairs, and hooked a claw-like finger into the back of Jake’s collar, dragging him toward the lectern like a reluctant sack of flour.
“Well, Jake, since you’ve provided such a proficient appraisal, let’s get into the nitty-gritty,” Halloway rasped, his eyes gleaming with a malicious, pedagogical fervor.
He didn’t wait for Jake to protest.
He grabbed Jake’s trembling hands and shoved them—first onto the heavy, doughy shelf of Fizzle’s cleavage, then against the firm, crystalline-dusted mounds of Moon-Glow, and finally, he forced his palms against the taut, defiant curve of Yui’s chest.
“Don’t just stare at them like a lost puppy,” Halloway barked, his voice dripping with wicked delight.
“Get to work!
Analyze!
What about the mass?
The perky-ness?
The hardening of the nipples under your touch?
The wobble-factor, the bounce-back, and all the other variables a true student of anatomy must account for!”
Jake stood trapped between the three women, his hands pinned against their warm, exposed flesh.
He was stark naked, completely undefended, and his brain was frantically trying to recall the Headmistress’s “punishment” erection-suppression exercise. New chapters come out on novelping . com first.
Every time Yui shifted or Fizzle’s weight pressed against him, his erection twitched with an independent, excited life of its own, turning his attempt at a “scientific assessment” into a mortifying, public display of his own lack of control.
He stood there, red-faced and exposed, imagining the Headmistress watching from the shadows of the rafters, her eyes narrow and disappointed, waiting for him to finally snap and crumble under the weight of his own biology.
He wasn’t just afraid of the students laughing; he was paralyzed by the thought of her silent, icy judgment should she see him failing the “honesty” of the day so spectacularly.
“They’re…
they’re very structural,” Jake stammered, his voice a pathetic squeak as he felt the heavy, rhythmic sag of Fizzle’s skin against his palm, the sharp, cold bite of the crystals on Moon-Glow’s chest, and the stubborn, pulsating heat emanating from Yui’s breasts.
Halloway leaned in close, his breath smelling of old parchment and malice.
“Use your hands, boy!
Don’t be shy.
A scientist never fears the data, no matter how soft or bouncy it might be.”
Halloway’s eyes glittered with the kind of dangerous, scholarly glee usually reserved for people who have just discovered how to turn lead into gold—or, in this case, how to turn a lecture hall into a high-stakes study of squish.
“If we are to be thorough,” Halloway chirped, his voice echoing with the manic energy of a man who’d forgotten the meaning of ‘ethics’ sometime in the late nineties, “we simply must investigate the gravitational constants of the lower quadrants.
A better vantage point is required, wouldn’t you agree?”
With a casual flick of his wrist, he commanded the trio to adopt a posture that was less ‘academic’ and more ‘highly optimistic furniture shopping.’ They bent over the lectern, hips arched with the practiced ease of professionals, presenting a panoramic view that suggested gravity was, in fact, the most seductive force in the universe.
Jake found himself staring directly at a trio of rear ends, all hanging heavy and vulnerable like fruit that had decided to ignore the harvest and just stay suspended in perpetual, trembling defiance.
“Observe the hang, the tension, the sheer defiance of geometry!” Halloway hissed, unhooking a camera with the speed of a man drawing a sidearm.
He shoved past a paralyzed Jake and snapped a photo of Yui’s bosom as it swung with the majestic, unbothered rhythm of a pendulum.
The flash illuminated the room with the harsh, unforgiving light of a police interrogation.
“Perfect,” Halloway whispered, his voice suddenly thick with a terrifying, domestic sentimentality.
A triumph of engineering.”
The women exchanged a look, spotting the way Jake was currently vibrating between intense scientific curiosity and the very real possibility of spontaneous combustion.
They realized he was less a judge and more a man watching a train wreck while standing on the tracks.
“He needs to be systematic, Professor,” Yui purred, pulling a measuring tape from Halloway’s kit and thrusting it into Jake’s limp, shaking hands.
“He’s clearly struggling with the sheer volume of the data.”
The lecture hall promptly dissolved into a clinical circus.
They began steering Jake like a dazed butler at a very expensive, very nude gala.
He was forced to wrap the tape around breasts that seemed to have their own gravitational pull, his fingers fumbling against skin so warm it felt like it had been sitting in the sun for an hour.
Then came the scales; he had to hold a tray underneath, feeling the ‘dead weight’ of flesh that spilled over the edges with the enthusiasm of over-risen dough attempting a breakout.
Moon-Glow produced a laser thermometer, pressing the cold, metallic tip against nipples, chests, and the flushed skin between their thighs with the clinical indifference of a mechanic checking tire pressure.
Jake stood there, a sweating, trembling monument to indecision, clutching a clipboard in one hand and a measuring tape in the other, his own anatomy currently staging a very loud, very visible protest against his trousers.
He was no longer a judge; he was a human slide-rule in a room of two hundred people who were watching him lose his mind, one variable at a time.
“Record the data, Jake!” Halloway barked, his voice booming over the sound of two hundred students howling with a mix of awe and unbridled amusement.
“Weight, circumference, thermal output!
Don’t leave a single variable unmeasured.
Science, boy!
It waits for no man, and it certainly doesn’t wait for your dignity!”