“Ivnia.”
“P-Please let go.”
Ivnia turned her head away, her expression cold to the point of being harsh. Her face was twisted with embarrassment.
Arad’s expression gradually twisted as he looked at her. Her rejection was painfully difficult to bear. He endured the boiling emotions inside him with difficulty and released Ivnia.
Behind them, Ranelli was calling for Ivnia.
“Mommy!”
“Oh, Ranelli, my baby……”
Ivnia rushed toward Ranelli as though her dead daughter had come back to life.
Only after the child was in her arms did Ivnia finally feel at ease.
She looked at Arad, who stood there crookedly with his arms crossed. Arad was staring back at her with an expression that seemed to ask what all the fuss was about.
Only then did she notice Hampton, whose face was filled with shock. He widened his eyes and gestured for her to apologize to Arad immediately.
Ivnia hurriedly hid Ranelli behind her and bowed deeply.
“I-I’m sorry, my lord.”
How dare a newly hired, low-ranking maid cause such a commotion?
Breaking into the duke’s office, which even the butler could not freely enter, was such a serious offense that she would have had no excuse even if she were immediately dismissed.
Ivnia bowed as low as she could.
“I was worried about the child, so I…… I’m sorry.”
Arad stared intently at Ivnia. It seemed as though he was reading the signs of fear in her.
“If someone saw this, they’d think I had kidnapped her.”
“……”
Ivnia tightly pressed her lips together.
She said nothing, but Arad knew that her silence was a quiet protest.
Through her silence, Ivnia was silently accusing him, asking what else this could be if it wasn’t kidnapping.
“Surely you didn’t hear anything?”
He looked at Hampton as though demanding an explanation.
“I believe I told you to tell her that the child was here so she could come and get her.”
“I sent someone else, but it seems their paths didn’t cross.”
“Words can’t even be properly conveyed within the same house. Is there anything here that actually works properly?”
At Arad’s sharp, emotionless voice, Hampton bowed his head deeply.
“It was my mistake.”
When Hampton bowed his head, Ivnia couldn’t simply remain still.
“It was because I failed to properly take care of the child. I’m sorry for causing a disturbance. I will gladly accept my punishment.”
Arad frowned. He hadn’t been seeking an apology from Ivnia.
Unlike the voice he had used with Hampton, he spoke irritably in a somewhat restrained voice.
“I’m the one who brought the child here without permission. Why are you apologizing?”
Ivnia simply bowed her head even lower.
As the owner of this place, Arad wasn’t at fault for acting as he pleased. But for an ordinary employee like her to act on her own was a serious offense.
“I’m sorry.”
“So what exactly are you sorry for?”
Every time Ivnia opened her mouth, she felt herself going against him. It felt as though she was only fueling his anger.
‘This is difficult.’
She felt as though she were trapped in a maze with no exit. Perhaps because she was so nervous in front of Arad, her mind kept going blank.
Taking Arad’s words literally, she listed every one of her mistakes.
“For daring to enter this place without permission, and for failing to properly take care of the child, and for the child’s disrespectful behavior……”
“No, I’m not asking you to list what you did wrong. ……Forget it. Stop. It’s nothing.”
Arad frowned and glared at Ivnia.
His tightly pressed lips looked less angry than hurt.
But Ivnia couldn’t see that with her head bowed.
“I’m sor……”
“I don’t want to hear it. I was simply playing with the child.”
Ivnia lowered her eyes, unable to dare meet the eyes of her high-ranking employer. Her pupils trembled slightly.
‘He was playing with her? Why?’
Her mouth went dry. It felt as though her chest were tightening.
What had he talked about with Ranelli? Had he realized that Ranelli was her daughter? Had the child carelessly revealed their secret? Why had he met with Ranelli separately, without her?
At that moment, Ranelli, who had been watching the situation, cautiously stepped forward.
“Mommy, I was playing with the duke……!”
Ranelli spoke carefully, trying to gauge Ivnia’s mood.
“The duke gave me lots of yummy things, too! Look at this!”
Ranelli pointed at the desserts piled up on the table.
Ivnia realized that Ranelli was trying to help her and immediately understood.
If the child had noticed that she was anxious and was acting this way because of it, then Arad must have noticed as well.
‘I mustn’t look too strange. Calm down.’
Ivnia forced herself to look calm.
It was probably already strange that she had lost her reason and rushed here in a panic, but that could be considered a normal reaction from a mother who had lost her child.
Now that she had found her child, it was time to regain her composure and clean up the situation.
“Ranelli, you mustn’t disturb the duke like this. You’re putting Mom in a difficult position. Promise the duke clearly. Tell him you’ll never come into his sight again.”
“Ah, but……”
Ranelli had been brought here against her will in Arad’s arms, so she thought Ivnia had misunderstood and tried to explain.
But faced with Ivnia’s firm expression, she had no choice but to nod.
“Yes, Mom.”
Arad, sensing that the situation was taking a strange turn, stepped in for Ranelli.
“I’m the one who brought the child here, Ivnia. She wasn’t a bother to me at all.”
But Ivnia drew a sharp line between them.
“Thank you for the duke’s kindness and mercy. I will make sure nothing like this ever happens again. If you permit me, I will take the child and leave immediately.”
When Ivnia bowed her head, Ranelli, watching her mother, also bowed her head to Arad.
“I’m sorry, Duke……”
At Ranelli’s apology, Arad was rendered speechless as he looked down at the small head bowed before him.
Many people always bowed their heads before him. It was something natural and familiar.
But at this moment, seeing that tiny child bow her head before him felt incredibly unfamiliar to Arad.
It was confusing and uncomfortable.
This wasn’t the situation he had wanted when he brought Ranelli here.
“Raise your head.”
He ordered in a complicated voice.
But neither of them raised their heads.
“You’re ignoring my words even while apologizing.”
Only then did Ivnia and Ranelli raise their heads.
They merely raised their heads. Neither of them met Arad’s eyes. Not even Ranelli, who had been looking at him with bright, curious eyes.
Arad noticed something he had dropped on the floor earlier when he hurriedly got up and opened the door after hearing Ivnia’s voice.
It was a piece of cloth he had been sewing.
[Then, could you make clothes for my doll?]
He had told her to ask for anything she wanted, and the child had made such a ridiculous request.
He had never sewn before, so he had been at a loss, but since he had said it, he had tried anyway. He had thought he could simply make something roughly large enough to wrap around the body of the doll Ranelli was holding.
‘Damn it.’
He swallowed back a curse.
“I just wanted to do something for the child. I wondered if there was anything I could help with. That’s all.”
His voice was raw, stripped even of dignity or pride.
He roughly ran a hand through his hair.
He felt like there was something he needed to say to Ivnia. Something he desperately wanted to say.
But he couldn’t figure out what it was.
At that moment, Ivnia, who had been looking down, suddenly raised her gaze and stared at Arad.
As though she found him very strange.
“……”
Arad stared blankly into her gaze for a moment.
Her gaze was clear, yet there was something empty about it.
Arad realized that the look in her eyes right now was precisely what she truly felt.
That was how she felt toward him.
A heart that had become empty.
Ivnia, who until now had done nothing but mechanically repeat that she was sorry, finally expressed a question to Arad for the first time.
“Help?”
Her voice was monotonous.
Ivnia showed no emotion, but Arad could tell she was angry from the subtle change in her voice.
It was a tiny difference that others wouldn’t notice, but Arad, whose attention had been completely focused on Ivnia, could clearly feel it.
“Thank you for saying so, but the mercy you showed by allowing me to work here again is enough. Ranelli does not need your help.”
She looked directly at Arad and emphasized her words.
“We don’t need any help.”
She bowed her head deeply once again to apologize for her rudeness today. Then she quietly took Ranelli and left.
Only after she had disappeared did Arad realize what he had wanted to say to her moments ago.
“Don’t…… push me away that much.”
He felt as though he were an unwelcome guest who had been permanently banished from her life.
Arad sat blankly on the sofa in his office. It felt like watching a handful of sand slip entirely between his fingers, leaving only an empty palm.
‘Who was it that suddenly disappeared without a trace one day? If you hated me that much, you should have stayed away from here and lived well, showing off how well you were doing.’
Arad, unable to contain his anger and frustration, overturned all the dessert plates Ranelli had left behind.
The sharp sound of breaking glass only fueled his agitation.
Even though there was no one to hear him, he shouted into the empty air, huffing like a madman.
“I gave you a chance. And yet you’re the one who ran away!”
Only after completely wrecking his office did he collapse weakly into a chair and bury his face in his hands.
He felt absolutely, terribly miserable.
“Why do you hate me so much? Why……”
Complicated emotions surged over him.
His thoughts lingered on a certain day in the past.
[Listen to me, Arad!]
Ivnia had been trying to explain something.
But that day, he had turned away from her.
He had been afraid of what he would hear from her own lips.
Because he had cowered like a coward, he hadn’t even realized that Ivnia was planning to leave.
He never imagined that it would be the last time.
The next morning, the head maid, who had gone to look for Ivnia when she failed to appear, found Ivnia’s bed soaked in blood.
And everyone came to know that she had disappeared without a trace.
Only Arad knew what had happened.
Why she had left after leaving such a trace behind.
[Get rid of the child.]
He was the only person who knew she was pregnant, and she had left behind proof that she had obeyed his words.
And she had been disappointed by his rejection of her, so she had disappeared.
Arad was overwhelmed by guilt.
He regretted treating her so coldly.
He felt empty as he stared at the space she had left behind.
He couldn’t even imagine what Ivnia must have felt when she hurriedly resolved to leave the mansion with a body that had shed so much blood.
He had gone searching for her out of fear that something might have happened to her, but as though someone were deliberately interfering, he couldn’t even catch sight of her shadow.
He missed her desperately.
If he had known he would miss her this much, he never should have treated her so coldly.
‘What would have happened if I had listened t o you back then?’
It was a thought he had had countless times over seven years.
‘If only I hadn’t said those things back then.’
His deep regret turned into anger toward himself.
He buried his face in his hands and hunched deeply forward.
The eyes visible between his fingers had turned blood-red.