For a moment, Evelyn forgot how to move.
Daniel Mercer stood less than twenty metres away, beside a low stone wall on an otherwise deserted country road.
He looked almost exactly as she remembered him.
Dark hair that needed cutting. A familiar jacket. The slightly awkward way he held his shoulders when he wasn't sure what to do with his hands.
He looked like Daniel.
That was the worst part.
Not a monster. Not an armoured adventurer. Not someone carrying a weapon openly or wearing the insignia of a guild.
Just Daniel.
The boy who had lived three houses down from her parents. Who had once broken his wrist falling out of a tree because she'd dared him to climb higher. Who knew she hated mushrooms and always stole the last roast potato from her plate when he visited.
The boy who had pushed a knife into her chest.
"Evie," he said again.
Her feet moved before she'd decided to run.
One step backward.
Daniel noticed.
"Wait."
She took another step.
"Please. Just listen to me."
"No."
The word came out barely louder than a whisper.
He frowned.
"Evie—"
"No."
This time it was louder.
Daniel raised both hands, palms facing her.
"Okay. All right. I'm not going to hurt you."
Evelyn stared at him.
For one extraordinary moment, she wondered whether she'd misheard.
Then she laughed.
It wasn't a pleasant sound.
"You're not going to hurt me?"
Daniel winced.
"I know how that sounds."
"Do you?"
"Yes."
"Do you actually?"
He glanced down the empty road before looking back at her.
"We need to talk."
"No, we don't."
"Evie, please."
She took another step backward.
Her oversized boot slipped slightly on the uneven edge of the tarmac. She caught herself, wincing as pain flared through her burned wrist.
Daniel's gaze dropped to the injury.
"What happened to your arm?"
Evelyn looked at him.
Something hot and ugly twisted inside her chest.
"Are you serious?"
He hesitated.
"You're hurt."
"Yes, Daniel. I've noticed."
"Let me see."
He started toward her.
"Don't!"
He stopped immediately.
Evelyn's breathing was too fast. She could feel it happening, could recognize the beginning of panic, but knowing what it was didn't make it easier to control.
She glanced toward the trees.
The woodland began only a few metres from the road. Thick undergrowth covered the slope beneath them.
She could run.
Maybe.
But her boots didn't fit, she hadn't eaten properly, and Daniel was standing between her and the direction she'd been walking.
He followed her glance.
"Please don't run."
"Then leave me alone."
"I can't."
The answer came too quickly.
Evelyn felt her stomach tighten.
"Why?"
Daniel opened his mouth.
Closed it.
Then said, "Because I know what happened."
She stared.
"What happened?"
"At the university. Afterward. I know you came back."
Her skin went cold.
Of course he knew.
He'd seen her.
He'd been there when she opened her eyes after he stabbed her.
But hearing him say it so calmly was somehow worse.
"You killed me."
Daniel flinched.
"Evie—"
"You killed me."
"I know."
"No." Her voice rose. "You don't get to say that like you accidentally broke something!"
"I didn't mean—"
"You put a knife in my chest!"
He looked away.
For a moment, neither spoke.
Somewhere deeper in the woods, a bird called.
The sound seemed absurdly normal.
Daniel rubbed a hand over his face.
"I thought it would work."
Evelyn blinked.
"What?"
"I thought—" He stopped, searching for words. "I thought if it happened quickly, before anyone else got involved, maybe we could figure something out."
She stared at him.
"Figure something out?"
"About the quest."
"You thought killing me would help us figure something out?"
"That's not what I meant."
"Then what did you mean?"
He didn't answer.
Evelyn felt an awful certainty settling over her.
He wasn't going to apologize.
Not properly.
He might say he was sorry. He might look miserable. He might even believe he regretted what he'd done.
But he still thought there was an explanation that would make it reasonable.
"How did you find me?" she asked.
Daniel looked up.
"What?"
"How did you find me?"
He hesitated.
"Does it matter?"
Evelyn stared at him.
"Yes, Daniel. It bloody matters."
"I've been looking for you."
"That isn't an answer."
"I know."
"Then answer me."
He glanced toward the trees again.
"I'll explain. But not here."
A chill moved down her spine.
Not here.
As though he expected her to go somewhere with him.
As though they were arranging to meet for coffee.
"No."
"Evie, just—"
"No. I'm not going anywhere with you."
Daniel's expression tightened.
"You can't keep running forever."
"Watch me."
"People are looking for you."
She almost laughed again.
"Really? I hadn't noticed."
"I'm serious."
"So am I."
"There are people out there who will do much worse than I did."
Evelyn went still.
For a moment, the road seemed to tilt beneath her feet.
She thought of Northstar.
Of Catherine's smile.
Of the straps holding her against the examination table.
Of poison burning through her body and electricity tearing through her muscles.
She thought of Idris Al-Nasir and the heat of his flames.
Worse than Daniel?
Yes.
Some of them had been worse.
But Daniel had been first.
And Daniel had been someone she trusted.
"You don't get to use that," she said quietly.
He frowned.
"Use what?"
"Other people hurting me. You don't get to use that to make what you did seem better."
"That's not what I'm doing."
"It is."
"Evie—"
"Stop saying my name."
He fell silent.
Evelyn swallowed.
She needed to leave.
Every second she stood here was another second something could go wrong.
She moved toward the trees.
Daniel shifted.
Not much.
Just enough to make her stop.
"Please," he said. "I need to know something."
"No."
"Just one thing."
"I said no."
He looked at her with an expression she couldn't quite understand.
Fear, perhaps.
Hope.
Something else.
"Does it always happen?"
Evelyn felt her stomach drop.
"What?"
"When you die."
She stopped breathing.
Daniel took a careful step closer.
"You came back at the university. I saw it. But I don't know if that was a one-time thing or if—"
"Don't."
"Evie, I need to know."
"Why?"
He didn't answer.
"Why do you need to know that?"
His eyes moved over her face.
"Because if you can come back every time, then maybe—"
"Maybe what?"
He swallowed.
"Maybe there's a way to fix this."
Evelyn stared at him.
Then she shook her head.
"No."
"Listen—"
"No. Whatever you're thinking, no."
She turned toward the trees.
Behind her, Daniel said, "Evie, wait."
She kept walking.
"Please."
She broke into a run.
And heard him move.
\---
She made it perhaps six steps.
Then Daniel shouted, "STOP!"
Something in his voice made her glance back.
He had a gun.
For one frozen instant, Evelyn couldn't understand what she was seeing.
A pistol.
Black.
Held in both hands.
Pointed at her.
Daniel had a gun.
The thought arrived with such terrible simplicity that everything else seemed to disappear.
"Daniel?"
He looked frightened.
That was what she noticed.
Not angry.
Not triumphant.
Frightened.
"Please stop running."
Evelyn stood motionless.
Her heart was hammering.
"Put it down."
"I don't want to hurt you."
She stared at the weapon.
"Then put it down."
"I just need you to listen."
"Daniel."
Her voice cracked.
"Please."
His hands were shaking.
She could see it from where she stood.
The muzzle wavered slightly.
"Just tell me," he said. "Does it work every time?"
Evelyn shook her head.
"I don't know."
It was a lie.
Not entirely.
She knew it had worked five times.
She didn't know whether it would work forever.
But that wasn't what Daniel was asking.
"Evie."
"Put the gun down."
"Please. I need to be sure."
Something inside her seemed to collapse.
He was going to do it.
Again.
She could see the decision forming on his face.
The same awful mixture of fear and determination she'd seen at the university.
"No," she whispered.
Daniel's mouth moved.
"I'm sorry."
The gunshot cracked through the trees.
For a moment, Evelyn felt nothing.
Then something struck her chest with enough force to knock the breath out of her.
She stumbled backward.
Looked down.
A dark stain was spreading across the front of her navy shirt.
She touched it.
Her fingers came away red.
"Oh."
It was such a small sound.
She hadn't meant to make it.
Her knees buckled.
The road rushed upward.
She hit the ground on her side, pain exploding through her chest.
She tried to breathe.
Couldn't.
Something wet filled her throat.
She coughed.
Blood splattered against the tarmac.
Daniel was shouting.
She couldn't understand the words.
He was running toward her.
Evelyn tried to crawl away.
Her arm wouldn't support her.
She collapsed onto her stomach.
The world narrowed.
A patch of grey road.
A few blades of grass growing through a crack.
The smell of damp earth.
She heard Daniel kneel beside her.
"Evie?"
His voice sounded distant.
"Evie, I'm here."
She wanted to tell him to go away.
She wanted to scream.
Instead, she coughed again.
More blood.
Her chest hurt.
God, it hurt.
She'd been burned alive.
Poisoned.
Electrocuted.
She knew pain.
It didn't make this any easier.
"You're going to be okay," Daniel said.
His voice was shaking.
"You're going to come back."
Evelyn tried to look at him.
She couldn't turn her head.
Her vision was darkening.
"Just... please..." he whispered.
She felt his hand close around hers.
She hated that she recognized the touch.
Then the road disappeared.
\---
Darkness.
Not the darkness of closed eyes.
Not sleep.
The other place.
Evelyn knew it immediately.
There was no pain here.
No weight.
No breath struggling inside damaged lungs.
She stood—or thought she stood—in an endless black space.
Her body was whole.
Her clothes were gone, although the absence no longer startled her. She had no physical sense of being exposed. Here, her appearance seemed less like flesh and more like an idea of herself.
She'd been here before.
Five times.
And each time, something had changed.
At first, there had been nothing.
Then a faint golden light.
The suggestion of furniture.
A chair.
A fireplace.
A figure sitting beside it.
Now the light was stronger.
Evelyn turned.
There it was.
A fireplace.
Not entirely real.
Its edges seemed to fade into the surrounding darkness, and the flames burned without illuminating anything beyond a small circle.
A red armchair stood before it.
Someone was sitting there.
Evelyn froze.
She'd seen the figure during her previous death.
Only briefly.
A silhouette.
This time she could make out more.
A man.
Or something shaped like one.
He wore dark clothing, with the suggestion of a waistcoat beneath a jacket. One arm rested along the chair, and his legs were crossed comfortably.
He appeared to be looking into the fire.
Evelyn stared.
Her fear of Daniel hadn't followed her here in quite the same way.
But something else took its place.
Curiosity.
And a strange, instinctive caution.
"Hello?"
Her voice sounded wrong.
Not echoed.
Not muffled.
Simply present.
The figure didn't move.
Evelyn took a tentative step.
"Excuse me?"
The man shifted.
Only slightly.
Then his head turned.
"Hm?"
His voice was clear.
Calm.
Almost distracted.
"Who's there?"
Evelyn stopped.
He could hear her.
For the first time, something in this place had responded.
"I—"
She didn't know what to say.
The man leaned forward a fraction.
The firelight caught part of his face, but the details remained indistinct, as though her eyes refused to focus.
"How curious," he murmured.
Evelyn's heart—or whatever served as one here—seemed to skip.
"Who are you?"
The man tilted his head.
Then the darkness moved.
Not around him.
Around her.
A familiar pull seized Evelyn, dragging her backward.
"No, wait!"
The fireplace receded.
The red chair became a distant shape.
The man's voice followed her.
"Well, now—"
And the darkness broke.
\---
Air slammed into her lungs.
Evelyn jerked upright with a strangled gasp.
Her hands flew to her chest.
She could breathe.
She could breathe.
For several seconds, that was all she understood.
Air.
Cold air.
Her heart beating.
Her lungs working.
She was alive.
Again.
The road beneath her was hard and damp. Her navy shirt clung unpleasantly to her skin, soaked with blood that no longer belonged to any wound.
A small hole marked the fabric over her chest.
Her fingers found smooth, unbroken skin beneath it.
She was whole.
Daniel sat beside her.
He had pulled his knees up and was staring at her with an expression she'd never seen before. His pistol rested loosely in his right hand.
For a moment, neither moved.
Then Daniel exhaled.
"You do come back."
Evelyn stared at him.
He sounded relieved.
Almost pleased.
"I needed to be sure," he added quietly.
Something escaped her throat.
A small, strange sound.
Daniel frowned.
"Evie?"
She laughed.
It was barely more than a breath at first.
Then another.
And another.
She looked down at the blood covering her shirt, at the bullet hole over her chest, at the perfectly intact skin beneath it.
Then back at Daniel.
And she laughed harder.
"Oh my God."
Her voice cracked.
"Oh my God, Daniel."
"Evie, are you—"
"You needed to be sure?"
She laughed again.
It came out too loud.
Too sharp.
Daniel shifted uncomfortably.
"Please, just—"
"No, no, I get it!"
She nodded rapidly, still laughing.
"Of course! Of course you needed to be sure!"
Her hands were shaking.
She held them up between them, staring at the blood drying across her fingers.
"Because the first time wasn't enough, was it?"
Daniel's expression tightened.
"That's not—"
"You stabbed me, I died, I came back, and you thought—what? Maybe I should shoot her too? Just to double-check?"
Her laughter broke into something dangerously close to a sob.
She pressed a hand against her mouth.
For a second, she managed to stop.
Then she looked at him again.
And started laughing all over.
Daniel stared at her.
"Evie, you're scaring me."
That did it.
Evelyn doubled over.
She laughed so hard that she couldn't breathe.
I'm scaring him.
The thought was so absurd that she couldn't hold on to it.
She had been poisoned.
Burned alive.
Electrocuted.
Shot through the chest.
And Daniel Mercer was sitting beside her, telling her that she was frightening him.
"Sorry," she gasped.
Another burst of laughter escaped her.
"Sorry, Daniel. Wouldn't want to make you uncomfortable."
"Evie..."
"Should I lie down again?"
She gestured vaguely at the bloodstained road.
"Would that help? Maybe you can shoot me a third time. Really make sure."
"Stop."
His voice had changed.
She barely noticed.
"Or maybe we should keep a record! You know, proper scientific method. Stabbing, shooting—oh, I've already done fire, by the way. That one was fun."
She was talking too quickly.
She knew it.
The words kept coming anyway.
"Actually, no, it wasn't. None of them were. Isn't that funny?"
Her laughter faltered.
For a moment, she simply stared at him.
Then she whispered, "None of them were."
Daniel reached toward her.
"Evie, please. Calm down."
She recoiled so violently that her shoulder struck the stone wall.
"Don't touch me."
The words came out flat.
All the laughter was gone.
Daniel froze.
Evelyn stared at his outstretched hand.
At the familiar fingers.
At the hand that had held a knife.
At the hand that had held a gun.
Her breathing grew shallow.
"Don't you ever touch me again."
"Okay," Daniel said quickly. "Okay. I won't."
She pushed herself upright, stumbling as her oversized boots slipped beneath her.
Daniel stood too.
"Evie, wait. We need to talk."
She shook her head.
"No."
"Please."
"No, Daniel."
He stepped toward her.
She backed away.
"I'm trying to help you."
For one terrible second, she almost started laughing again.
Instead, she whispered, "Then why do you keep killing me?"
Daniel had no answer.
Evelyn turned to leave.
He caught her arm.
And whatever fragile control she'd managed to recover shattered.
"LET GO OF ME!"
She twisted violently, trying to wrench herself free.
Daniel tightened his grip.
"Evie, stop! Just listen to me!"
She struck him.
Not a proper punch.
More of a wild swing with her free hand.
Her fist caught his shoulder.
Daniel grunted.
"Ow—Evie!"
"LET GO OF ME!"
She pulled again.
He held on.
"Stop! You're going to hurt yourself!"
The words were so absurd that Evelyn nearly screamed.
She drove her shoulder into him.
Daniel staggered backward half a step.
His eyes widened.
For an instant, genuine surprise crossed his face.
"Since when are you this—"
"GET OFF ME!"
She shoved him again.
This time he braced himself.
He was still stronger.
She could feel it.
Daniel had always been stronger than her. He'd been the one who carried heavy boxes when her family moved furniture, who opened stubborn jars and teased her about struggling with things he found easy.
That hadn't changed.
But something had.
Her body responded a little faster than she expected. Her balance recovered more quickly when he pulled her sideways, and she managed to twist out of a grip that should have held her.
Not by much.
Not enough to overpower him.
But enough to surprise them both.
Daniel reached for her again.
Evelyn ducked beneath his arm.
Her injured wrist struck his jacket.
Pain flashed through it.
She cried out.
He caught her around the shoulders.
"THEN LET ME GO!"
She drove her elbow backward.
It caught him somewhere in the ribs.
Daniel grunted and loosened his hold.
Evelyn twisted free.
Then she saw the gun.
Still in his hand.
Her blood turned cold.
She grabbed his wrist.
"DROP IT!"
Daniel jerked in surprise.
"Evie—"
"DROP THE GUN!"
He tried to pull his hand away.
She held on.
Her fingers slipped against his jacket.
He caught her other wrist.
For a moment, they stood locked together, struggling in the middle of the deserted road.
Daniel was stronger.
He forced her arms downward.
Evelyn stumbled.
Her boot caught against his foot.
They crashed into the low stone wall.
Pain shot through her back.
She gasped.
Daniel tried to steady them.
"Stop moving!"
"LET GO!"
She shoved against him.
The pistol swung between them.
Evelyn grabbed at his hand again, trying desperately to keep the barrel away from her chest.
She couldn't die again.
Not now.
Not because of him.
Daniel's fingers tightened around the weapon.
"Evie, you're going to—"
The gun went off.
The sound was deafening.
Daniel screamed.
His grip vanished.
Evelyn staggered backward.
For a moment, she couldn't understand what had happened.
Daniel fell against the wall, then slid to the ground.
He clutched his right thigh.
Blood was spreading rapidly across his trousers.
"Oh, God."
His voice cracked.
"Oh, God, my leg."
Evelyn stared.
The pistol was in her hand.
She didn't remember taking it.
One moment they'd been struggling.
The next—
She looked down at the weapon.
Then at Daniel.
He was breathing hard, his face twisted in pain.
"Evie."
She flinched.
He reached toward her.
"Help me."
The words struck harder than she expected.
Help me.
She looked at the blood.
At his hands pressed against his leg.
At the way he struggled to keep himself upright.
He was hurt.
Badly.
She'd hurt him.
Or the gun had.
She didn't even know who'd pulled the trigger.
"Evie, please."
She took a step toward him.
Instinct.
Habit.
Daniel was hurt.
Daniel needed help.
She'd known him for most of her life.
She remembered him falling off his bicycle when they were children. She remembered cleaning gravel out of his scraped knee while he complained that she was making it worse.
She remembered him laughing.
She remembered—
The knife.
The gunshot.
The blood filling her lungs.
I needed to be sure.
Evelyn stopped.
Daniel looked up at her.
"Please."
Her hands were shaking.
She looked at the pistol.
Then at the road stretching away between the trees.
There was no one coming.
No car.
No witness.
Just the two of them.
She could stay.
She could try to help him.
She could let him explain.
Again.
Daniel shifted, wincing.
"Evie, I didn't—"
"Don't."
He went still.
Her voice was barely audible.
"Don't say it."
She backed away.
"Evie?"
Another step.
"Where are you going?"
She couldn't answer.
She turned.
And ran.
\---
She didn't know how long she ran.
The road disappeared behind her almost immediately.
She plunged into the woodland, stumbling over roots and pushing through brambles.
Her boots slipped.
Branches scratched her face.
Her lungs burned.
She kept going.
The pistol was still in her hand.
She hadn't realized it until she'd nearly fallen and instinctively thrown out her arms to catch herself.
The black metal flashed in front of her.
She stopped so abruptly that she almost lost her balance.
The gun.
Daniel's gun.
She stared at it.
Her fingers were wrapped around the grip.
There was blood on the metal.
She didn't know whether it was hers or his.
For a moment, she wanted to throw it away.
As far as possible.
Into the bushes.
Into the stream.
Anywhere she wouldn't have to look at it.
Then she remembered the spear.
How she'd dropped it when the farmer frightened her.
How helpless she'd felt afterward.
She looked down at the pistol again.
It was a weapon.
A real weapon.
She didn't know how to use it properly.
She didn't know how many bullets remained.
She didn't even know whether she'd accidentally fire it again.
But she knew what it could do.
She'd felt what it could do.
Twice now.
Evelyn swallowed.
She carefully lowered her hand, keeping the barrel pointed away from herself.
She couldn't carry it openly.
Someone might see.
Someone might ask questions.
Someone might recognize her.
She tucked it awkwardly into the waistband of her trousers, then immediately regretted it when the cold metal pressed against her stomach.
She adjusted it until it felt less likely to fall.
It wasn't comfortable.
It wasn't safe.
But she couldn't think of a better option.
Not yet.
She started walking again.
Slower.
More carefully.
Her heart was still racing.
She listened for footsteps.
For shouting.
For Daniel calling her name.
Nothing.
Only the forest.
She kept moving until she reached a fallen tree beside a shallow ditch.
Then her legs gave out.
She sat heavily on the trunk.
For several minutes, she did nothing but breathe.
In.
Out.
Again.
Her hands wouldn't stop shaking.
She looked down at her shirt.
Blood covered the front.
Daniel's bullet had left a small, dark hole in the fabric.
Beneath it, her skin was perfect.
No scar.
No bruise.
No sign that she'd been shot through the chest less than an hour ago.
She touched the spot.
Her fingers trembled.
Six times.
She'd died six times.
And Daniel was responsible for two of them.
She closed her eyes.
The image of him sitting beside her body returned.
His expression.
His voice.
You do come back.
Not Are you all right?
Not I'm sorry.
You do come back.
As though that was the important part.
As though everything she'd felt while dying was irrelevant because she'd eventually opened her eyes again.
Evelyn pressed a hand over her mouth.
She didn't want to cry.
She was so tired of crying.
But tears came anyway.
She sat alone in the woods, wearing blood-soaked clothes and holding herself together with what felt like the last few scraps of determination she possessed.
Daniel was alive.
She was almost certain of that.
The bullet had struck his leg.
He'd been conscious when she left.
He could probably call for help.
Someone would find him.
She hoped so.
The thought made her feel sick.
After everything he'd done, she still hoped someone would help him.
She didn't know what that said about her.
Perhaps nothing.
Perhaps she was simply incapable of turning off twenty years of knowing someone because they'd done something unforgivable.
She wiped her face.
Then she remembered the fireplace.
The red chair.
The man.
Her breathing slowed.
He'd spoken.
For the first time, he'd actually spoken to her.
Who's there?
She stared into the trees.
What was that place?
Why did she keep returning to it?
And who was sitting beside that fire?
She'd assumed it was part of dying.
Some strange illusion.
A hallucination produced by Undying.
But hallucinations didn't usually become clearer every time they appeared.
They didn't usually turn around and ask who was there.
Evelyn rubbed her temples.
She had too many questions.
About Undying.
About the System.
About the World Quest.
About whatever happened between death and resurrection.
And now—
About him.
She looked toward the faint sunlight filtering through the trees.
There had to be information somewhere.
Books.
Research.
People who studied the System.
People who understood Skills.
She'd spent years at university.
She knew how to find information.
Perhaps she couldn't fight.
Perhaps she couldn't trust anyone.
Perhaps she couldn't even steal an apple without making a complete disaster of it.
But she could read.
She could research.
She could learn.
It wasn't much.
But it was something.
Evelyn stood slowly.
Her legs were still trembling.
She looked back once.
The forest concealed the road completely.
Daniel was somewhere behind her.
Bleeding.
Alive.
And, for the moment, unable to follow.
She turned away.
She needed food.
Different clothes.
A way to change her appearance.
And somewhere she could start looking for answers.
She adjusted her oversized boots and began walking through the trees.
This time, she didn't look back.