—2.18: No reply all day. I asked Sheng Fuzhou's roommate, who said several combat department students had left in the middle of the night for various reasons, likely for secret training. No idea how long it'll last.
—2.20: Still no word. The chat history is still stuck at the 16th, when she asked me why I was angry.
—3.12: I pulled out the scarf she gave me when she walked me back to the dorm last time. The scent on it felt familiar, and only later did I remember I'd smelled it on that piece of paper. So it really was her pheromone after all—a little bitter.
—3.15: Still hasn't come back. It feels like she just vanished. Annoying.
—4.12: Almost two months now. What kind of secret training takes this long? I never thought Sheng Fuzhou would just disappear for this long before.
—4.18: Two months!
—4.20: Chu You came back to Landu on business, but before we could even exchange two sentences, his girlfriend called him away. Seriously. When will I get to see my girlfriend? Well, not technically my girlfriend yet.
—4.25: The experiment failed again. I hate the whole world.
—4.27: Once she's back and we meet face to face, we have to be together. I don't want to wait anymore. I want her to hold me.
—5.3: Sheng Fuzhou said the training is over, but she still hasn't replied to me. I asked someone from their department, and they said the trainees might have been sent to different zones.
—5.6: A lot of people got hurt. Her too. I snuck over to see her and overheard Pei Qiansu telling a classmate that she was injured saving someone. Luckily it's not serious—she was already treated at the training base. Today she went to the Medical Pod to change her dressing and needs to stay under observation for one more night.
I waited until Pei Qiansu was called away before going in. She was still asleep. She looked a little thinner, and her hair had grown longer. I lifted the blanket to see where she was hurt, and she grabbed my wrist.
Now that she was awake, I didn't know what to say. All I could manage was a dry "You're back." She just said "Mm." I asked how she got hurt, and she said it was just a minor injury, nothing serious. I wanted to see it, but she wouldn't let me, and said I looked like I was about to cry.
I had no idea what my expression looked like. I instinctively wanted to ask, "Don't you know why?" but the words wouldn't come out. I'd told myself that once she came back and we met, we had to be together—yet now, standing in front of her, I couldn't even bring myself to say it.
I don't think this is shyness or embarrassment. I'm just a little angry.
—5.7: I stayed with her in the Medical Pod all night. The doctor who came to check on her called me her boyfriend, and she didn't deny it—just naturally let it go unspoken. But something feels off to me. I can understand her not telling me about the secret training, but why didn't she contact me the moment it ended? Even her injury—I only found out because I went looking for her myself.
And besides, she's never even said she likes me.
—5.8: We haven't talked much these past few days, but I still go to the Medical Pod every afternoon. Sometimes her teammates accompany her, and I can only watch from a distance. Annoying. And she lets people call me her boyfriend—is this how you treat a boyfriend?
—5.10: Her injury healed, and she suddenly came to find me, bringing me a bouquet of flowers. I asked what it meant. She said it didn't mean anything—she just wanted to give them to me.
Can't you say even one more sentence?
—5.14, sent flowers for several days straight, the dorm can barely hold them all.
—5.15, how can there be someone in this world who talks so little! Say it already, I've already said yes!
—5.16, she's not in a hurry, but at this rate I'll go crazy first. In the evening I asked her out to clear things up, planned to just ask directly: are you courting me? She actually said, I thought you'd figured that out long ago.
And then?
Hate mutes!
—5.17, we're together now. She said: "Why I sent you flowers, why you rushed over the moment I came back, and why you got angry—those should all be the same reason."
Her ears were red, but she still looked at me very seriously and said: "I want to be with you."
When she said that, I really felt like I'd been punched in the chest. Before I could even say I want to be with you too, I was already dizzily throwing myself at her to kiss her. Thinking about it now, it's still a bit embarrassing.
—5.17, ahhhhhh that was so mortifying.
—5.17, what do I do what do I do what do I do what do I do what do I do what do I do what do I do what do I do what do I do what do I do.
—5.17, what should I do first when we meet tomorrow.
—5.17, I'm really insane, why did I kiss her. Who just throws themselves at someone to kiss them after being confessed to!
—5.17, restraint. Tomorrow I must be restrained.
—5.17, the scent of pheromone on her scarf hasn't faded yet.
—5.17, I really like her.
—5.17, I like you.
……
"—" Unaware of how long he'd been reading, Chu Hui finally noticed the figure standing diagonally behind him. He started violently, instinctively covering the screen with his hand, then sat up straight and called out: "Why are you sneaking around behind me!"
Liang Qiao handed him the fruit plate in her hand and said: "I wasn't sneaking."
Chu Hui was in no mood for fruit. He took the plate and set it on the table, then leaned back on the sofa to look up at her, asking: "What did you see?"
Liang Qiao spread her hands and said nothing.
"Come on, just tell me—" He straightened up and lunged onto her back, wanting to laugh but also feeling a bit embarrassed—those posts visible only to himself were just the youthful feelings he'd wanted to record. Even with Liang Qiao, he'd never planned to share every detail. But now she'd casually read through most of them, and those childish, anxious, tormented feelings triggered by a single word from her had been laid completely bare, with nowhere to hide.
Liang Qiao grasped his wrist and said: "I didn't see anything."
"You definitely saw something, tell me how much you read—" He wouldn't let her move, firmly locking his arms around her shoulders, one leg also expertly hooking over her waist.
Liang Qiao said: "I've already forgotten."
Chu Hui was so annoyed by those words that he laughed, saying: "You're not allowed to forget."
She reached out to steady the person who had completely draped himself over her back, saying: "Do you actually want me to see or not?"
"I don't! You looked secretly!" Chu Hui accused her, saying: "So annoying, you're not allowed to laugh at me."
"I wasn't laughing at all."
"You were definitely laughing inside!"
"Get off."
"I won't!"
"You said you wanted to be reserved."
"Ahhhh—you said you didn't see anything!"
"……"
Chu Hui laughed and teased against her back, their bickering dissolving into kisses as they tumbled breathlessly into the sofa. He pulled her down with him, the hem of his sleep pants sliding halfway up his calf as he lifted his leg, revealing pale, supple skin that soon wrapped around Liang Qiao's lower back.
"Let's go to the bed." The space was too small—it was cramping his style. In the few short steps between the sofa and the bed, he kicked off the last scrap of fabric covering his lower half, and as he fell onto the mattress, he swung his long leg over and straddled Liang Qiao.
His upper body was still neatly dressed in his pajama top, but below the waist he was completely bare. The hem of the shirt, neither too long nor too short, landed just at Liang Qiao's stomach, half-veiling everything beneath. Only through sensation could one perceive the muddied turbulence lurking beneath that calm surface.
An excess of satisfaction was like some potent hallucinogen—intoxicating, addictive, impossible to quit, boiling through his blood.
"Say it again, won't you?" Desire surged like a rising tide as he kissed her lips and mumbled his plea. "Wife—"
Liang Qiao's knuckles brushed against his lower abdomen. "Say what?"
"Hah…" Chu Hui arched his back with a fine tremor, burying his face in the hollow of her collarbone, made dizzy by the faint trace of pheromone drifting from the nape of her neck. He wanted to be touched everywhere, but he forced himself to answer: "Say what you said when you confessed to me."
Liang Qiao was silent.
She wasn't good at confessions, let alone sweet talk. What she'd said to Chu Hui when she'd opened up to him had been more of a natural, simple statement—tinged with a hint of impulsiveness. Now, removed from that scene and that moment, she didn't know how to begin.
"Say it again—" Chu Hui applied a little more pressure, and was rewarded with the sudden sharpening of Liang Qiao's breathing. He indulged himself shamelessly, whining and acting the fool, calling her "wife" in a breathless string before saying, "Say you want to be with me."
"I want…"
I like you, I like you, I like you…
His usual sticky, clingy pleas still echoed in her ears. Now, looking into his eyes churning with desire, Liang Qiao's heart softened. She brushed his sweat-dampened hair back behind his ear and spoke the words he most wanted to hear, her voice gentle.
"I want to be with you."
Lips met, skin sealed together. Chu Hui, gazing at the tenderness revealed through her half-lidded eyes, wished he could dissolve into water and let her swallow him whole.
…
And he got his wish—he dissolved into water.
Another night of going too far.
When he opened his eyes, he was lying face-down on the bed. The warm winter sun streamed in through the window, carrying a soft, cozy warmth.
He instinctively searched for Liang Qiao and finally spotted her by the inner windowsill between the balcony and the bedroom. He crawled over with his arms wrapped around himself and poked half his head out.
"Awake?" She met his gaze through the dense text on her light screen. "There's breakfast in the kitchen."
"Not hungry," he answered lazily, raising both arms in a stretch. "What are you reading?"
Liang Qiao replied: "Something from the Union Security Agency—materials on Cangshan City and the grassroots police station I'm being assigned to."
"This place really is a bit dangerous." Chu Hui had known where she was going since yesterday, but he still frowned with worry now. "Any further north and you'd be close to the Forbidden Zone."
The Federation is divided into four regions in total: the Seabed Resource Zone, the Inland Reconstruction Zone, the Outer-orbit Support Zone, and the Federal Central District. Aside from the Federal Central District, which refers exclusively to Landu, the other three regions each have their own subdivisions, with Forbidden Zone 3 being part of the Seabed Resource Zone.
According to the modern history they had studied, this area was once densely populated, but later, due to marine transgression, it suffered severe chemical pollution and unclear hydrological conditions. It also contained sunken cities and stealth structures, and was deemed uninhabitable yet necessary for research. To this day, only three special institutions have been established there: the Deep-Dive Special Surveillance Agency, the Ecological Risk Assessment Corps, and the Isolated Route Command Bureau. Moreover, this place is directly managed by the Federal Central District and is not subject to local government control.
As for why Cangshan City was dangerous, it was not merely because of its proximity to the Forbidden Zone, but also because it sat at the junction of the Forbidden Zone and the Outer-orbit Support Zone—the Outer-orbit Ring City project had been mired in controversy since its inception, and to this day a considerable number of people still oppose the establishment of the extraterrestrial orbit, with no fewer than a thousand radicals having organized extreme protests and marches in attempts to stop the construction of the Extraterrestrial Ring City in their own ways.
This group called themselves the Anti-Ring Organization. They had been roaming the border between the Old Third District and the Outer-orbit Support Zone, keeping a constant watch on the Support Zone's movements. To date, the Federation had engaged in no fewer than ten large-scale conflicts with them, yet still had not managed to wipe them out completely. One very important reason was that they had made the Forbidden Zone—a place no one dared to set foot in—one of their strongholds, and somehow knew how to come and go freely within it.
Cangshan City was simultaneously close to all these regions, so its level of danger went without saying.
"I know," Liang Qiao said. Having grown up in the Old Third District, he naturally understood the environment there better than Chu Hui or the data on the light-brain. "I'll be careful."
Chu Hui propped his chin on his hand and asked, "Three months, right?"
"At minimum," Liang Qiao replied. "But it's not closed training. I can video call you when I have free time."
Chu Hui was somewhat reassured and said, "Once my research institute application is done, I'll see if I can come find you."
"No need, it's too dangerous," Liang Qiao refused instinctively. "Just wait for me to come back."
Chu Hui fell silent, pressing his lips together as he looked at her, looking a bit displeased.
Liang Qiao didn't hear his response and only looked up to see his expression clearly. She stood up and walked over, saying, "It really is dangerous." The data had detailed the current situation in Cangshan City and this so-called Anti-Ring Organization. Besides attacks targeting the Outer-orbit Support Zone, the organization also seemed to be involved in more than a dozen human trafficking cases, with the vast majority of victims being Alphas and Omegas. Reconnaissance indicated that these people had likely been subjected to pheromone inducement.
However, this unverified information was still classified, and she couldn't disclose all of it to Chu Hui. She could only warn him sternly, saying, "You're not allowed to come find me secretly, understand?"
"Alright, alright…" Seeing her severe expression, Chu Hui backed down. "But what if I miss you…"
"I'm serious," Liang Qiao cut him off. "If I find out you came sneaking over, I'll break up with you."
He had grown up in a well-off family, coasting through life without a hitch, shielded by doting parents and a protective elder brother—which was precisely how he'd developed this fearless, nothing-scares-me personality. Liang Qiao had no doubt that if she didn't issue a stern warning, he really would sneak over to see her.
But at the word "breakup," Chu Hui froze on the spot—they'd been together for over a year, and this was the first time she'd ever said it. Yet instead of anger, what surged up first was hurt, like a child always spoiled by his family who suddenly gets slapped across the face in a moment of intimacy, his face full of bewildered incomprehension. He pressed his lips together and looked at her. "Are you threatening me?"
Liang Qiao said, "No. I'm just telling you."
"Then why do you have to say those two words!" He couldn't even bring himself to repeat them. "I'm not agreeing to it, not ever. Even if I die, I'll haunt you!"
As he spoke, he cursed under his breath, looking like he was about to cry from frustration. "If you'd just said it nicely, it's not like I wouldn't have listened. But you had to say that—I nearly died at your hands yesterday, and I just barely crawled out of bed, and now you're saying this…"
He really started crying.
Liang Qiao reached out to take his hand. He shook her off. She tried again. He shook her off again. Finally, she managed to hold on, and let out a faint sigh. "I was wrong."
His voice thick with tears, he asked, "Wrong about what!"
"I shouldn't have threatened you with a breakup."
"You said it again!" He made a show of shaking off her hand, and when that failed, he gave up. "You're threatening me with the thing I care about most."
He wasn't wrong. She really was using the thing he treasured most to threaten him, because nothing else would make him panic or back down. But why had she instinctively reached for a breakup as leverage? Was it because she knew he loved her, and that knowledge let her run wild without restraint?
At that thought, a strange feeling rose in her chest that she couldn't quite name, and for a fleeting moment, she even sensed something cruel in herself.
She tightened her grip on his hand, her tone softening this time. "I was wrong."
Chu Hui sniffled. "If you ever bring it up again, I'll really get mad."
She said, "Mm."
"Then give me a hug." He sat up on the windowsill, drew her in front of him, then leaned down and opened his arms, holding her in a clinging, dependent embrace.
They held each other for a long while before he said, "We have to video call at least once every three days."
Liang Qiao gently stroked his back and agreed. "Okay."