ROWAN I swallowed hard immediately I heard him asked that questions.
My ears were probably playing a big joke on me, so it was best to ignore it.
At least, that was what I tried to convince myself as I kept my head bowed.
But then the same question came again.
“Why do you look so familiar?
Do I know you from somewhere?” Your face looks so distinct like I saw you recently but I just couldn’t grab my head around where I had seen you from.” He said to me and I opened my mouth to speak up but no words came out of my mouth What could I possibly say at that moment that would make it look like I didn’t know him?
The way my heart was beating and how nervous I suddenly felt, I might end up telling him the truth without even meaning to.
I might actually tell him that he looked familiar because we fucked yesterday.
No.
Absolutely not.
I kept quiet, refusing to say anything.
I also refused to raise my head and look at him.
Maybe if I stayed like this, he would eventually forget about the question.
“Why is your head bowed?” I heard him ask.
Why couldn’t he just let me remain in this position?
“Fuck that.
Why can’t he just leave me alone instead of making my already miserable life even more miserable?” I thought bitterly.
I still didn’t answer him.
And it wasn’t even because I was intentionally ignoring him.
I simply had nothing to say.
What exactly was I supposed to tell him?
But instead of getting the message I was desperately trying to send, he continued talking and asking questions.
“You should raise your head when talking to me.
You shouldn’t be scared when talking to me.
You are not a child, and bowing your head like that is making you look disrespectful to me.
You are suppose to look at your professor when talking to them.” He said to me.
So now bowing of the head is disrespectful?
I didn’t say anything as I raised my head to look at him.
He was staring straight at me without even blinking.
The moment our eyes met, my stomach dropped.
His stare was steady, like he was looking straight through me.
I wanted to look away again, but I forced myself to hold his gaze.
My legs felt weak, and I was almost sure my knees would give out if I moved.
I was so nervous that I could barely keep my hands still.
“So now, answer my question.
Where do I know you from?” He asked the same question again, clearly refusing to let it go.
“Ummm… ymmm…” I stammered, desperately trying to think of something to say about why I looked familiar without telling him it was because of last night.
“It is… p-prob….
Umm… it is because… ummm… it is… I… umm…” I couldn’t even finish the sentence because I couldn’t think of any more lies.
Why was he punishing me with this question?
Since he was the one who said I looked familiar, wasn’t he supposed to be the one figuring out where he knew me from?
Why is he asking me?
He is getting me so frustrated.
Should I just break it all and tell him that it was from last night?
At this point, what was the worst that could happen?
Besides, he was the one forcing me into doing something I had no mind doing.
He was the one forcing the response out of my mouth, and I was going to give him exactly what he wanted so he could finally stop asking me the same question.
I took a deep breath.
“It is probably from las…” I was suddenly cut off by him.
“Yes!
Yes!” he suddenly exclaimed.
“Now I remember where exactly I know you from.” My heart jumped.
Did he finally remember?
Did he suddenly remember that we had spent the entire night together and had a pas— “I saw you from the poster in the professor meeting room.” he said to me and I suddenly froze.
For a second, I honestly couldn’t process what I had just heard.
“Wha… what is that?
You didn’t… you didn’t remember me from…” I stopped myself before I completely ruined my life.
“Yes!
Yes, sir.
It was from the professor poster.
That’s where you saw me from.” I quickly corrected myself before I could say anything stupid.
He nodded.
“Congratulations to you Mr…..” he trailed off.
“Rowan.” I completed it and he smiled.
“Yes congratulations to you Mr Rowan.
You really did a good job with your project.
It was exceptional and every one of the professors are so proud of you.” I forced a smile.
“As a matter of fact, they were so jealous of me when they found out that I was going to be your professor.” He gave me a full, genuine smile.
I returned it, although mine felt completely forced.
I didn’t know whether I should be happy that he didn’t remember me from last night.
Wasn’t I supposed to be happy?
Of course I was.
That was what I wanted in the first place.
I had spent the entire time in this office praying that he wouldn’t recognize me.
So why did I suddenly feel disappointed?
Why did it bother me that he remembered me because of some stupid project instead of remembering me from last night?
I frowned slightly.
“Calm down, Rowan.” I shouldn’t be thinking like this.
It was much better this way.
At least I wouldn’t have to spend every lecture wondering if he was secretly remembering everything.
“You are a very brilliant student with a great future.
Why then weren’t you concentrating throughout the class!” He asked me and honestly, I was already getting tired of his conversation with him.
My head was too full.
I just wanted the conversation to end so I could get out of that office.
“I’ll pay attention from now on,” I assured him with another forced smile.
“Thank you for noticing and caring about your student.” He nodded.
“And regarding your prize, it will be presented to you by the end of the week during the school’s award ceremony.
I’m looking forward to seeing you there.” I nodded slightly.
“Thank you, sir.” I turned toward the door before he could ask me anything else.
The moment I stepped outside, I released a breath I didn’t realize I had been holding.
Finally.
I was free.
I walked down the hallway, but my mind was already somewhere else.
Betrayal.
That was the only thing I could think about.
Why was I feeling betrayed?
Wasn’t I supposed to be grateful that he didn’t remember anything?
I should have been celebrating.
Instead, I felt strangely disappointed.
Then my disappointment slowly turned into anger.
If he didn’t remember then doesn’t that mean that he doesn’t care about who he has his one night stands with?
Then doesn’t that mean that he must have had countless night stands with different people for him not to care about that of yesterday?
The thought irritated me more than it should have.
“How could he be such a jerk?” I muttered.
He disgust me now.
I thought to myself.
I know it was just a nightstand and it was normal for him not to remember anything and even my face and I was supposed to be happy that he didn’t remember my face.
But it was also abnormal for him not to remember the face of the person who sucked the living daylight out of his dick.
That somehow made me feel worse.
I shook my head.
“What is wrong with me?” I was still lost in my thoughts when a familiar voice suddenly stopped me.
“You’ve been refusing to pick up my calls.
“Please, let’s talk.”