Hyungnam turned her head toward Eunhyung. Laughter was leaking through the long fingers covering most of his face.
Was he making fun of her?
Her brow furrowed involuntarily.
"No."
"Then why did you lie?"
"..."
"You know, if you lie to the police, they'll arrest you."
When he lowered his hand, his face was revealed, grinning idly. The way his cheeks bulged gave him away. It was another one of his stupid attempts to scare her. The man really did have a vicious streak when it came to tormenting people.
Hyungnam answered without expression.
"I'm not falling for it."
"It's true."
"It's not funny."
"You don't know that making a false statement is obstruction of official duties?"
In an instant, Choi Eunhyung's face turned serious, and he even tossed out the specific name of the offense.
Obstruction of... what?
She tried not to show it, but she couldn't stop the color from draining out of her face. Pressing her fingernails hard into her palm, she swallowed against her dry throat.
"...He said he wasn't working."
"..."
"He was drinking soju. Straight soju."
Her voice cracked at the end, making the words sound like an excuse. Choi Eunhyung watched her nervous reaction intently, then snickered again.
"All right. Got it."
"It's true."
"Yeah. Even if the police come, I'll make sure they don't arrest you."
He's the one they should be arresting. What's he acting so generous for?
Choi Eunhyung apparently found the whole thing so amusing that he kept spouting nonsense.
"What should I tell them we are?"
"..."
"Brother and sister whose parents are dead. Happy newlyweds."
"..."
"Ah, no. That one's too dirty."
He snickered at his crude joke.
Hyungnam felt as though all the blood were draining from her head.
He was mocking her.
Choi Eunhyung had called the two of them newlyweds, but to Hyungnam's ears, it sounded as though he were calling her and Park Shineok newlyweds.
As though he were sneering at Hyungnam, who was being exploited and could barely endure being alive, saying in a roundabout way, You two live under the same roof and do dirty things like a married couple, don't you?
As though she had volunteered for any of it.
Hyungnam's gaze drifted far away. Though she was looking at Choi Eunhyung, her eyes focused somewhere in the empty space beyond his silhouette.
I know.
I know how stupid and pathetic it is to stay here just because I can't bear to give up a few new banknotes and a comfortable place to sleep. But...
Choi Eunhyung was also someone Park Shineok merely used.
He was just another underling willing to get arrested in his place for the sake of money.
Her loosely clenched fist tightened until it began to tremble.
When you heard the police were here to catch gangsters, you were the first person I thought of. I said I'd never worried about you... but that was a lie.
We're in the same position. So... you, of all people—you shouldn't think of me as a whore.
“I don't take money from whores. Their cunts smell rotten.”
Hyungnam quietly lowered her head and looked down at herself.
Have I really become a whore? Is my cunt rotten? Has it rotted black beyond saving because it's had filthy things inside it so many times? So badly that even a beggar boy I'd never met could smell the rot on me?
If so, Choi Eunhyung must have known about the rotten smell long ago.
His senses were sharp enough to notice even the volume of a cassette player turned down to nearly nothing beyond a wall. Even though she made such a fuss of washing herself for ten minutes every day, he must have noticed the faint smell of semen clinging to her from the very beginning.
Hyungnam raised her head and looked up at Choi Eunhyung.
His eyes, dark as an abyss, seemed to be sneering at her. It was a sophisticated sneer, as polished as a masterpiece.
There had been times when his appearance had left her dazed, but she was glad she had never been captivated by him. Because she had never admired him, this was at least a little less miserable.
My God. To think this is something to be grateful for.
As Hyungnam recoiled in disgust, something inside her mind suddenly seemed to snap.
She took a short breath. Then, abruptly, a smile appeared on her face.
"What's wrong with being dirty?"
"..."
"I even jerked you off with my own hand, Manager Choi."
The playfulness vanished from Eunhyung's grinning face in an instant. His cold eyes seemed to glare at her, but Hyungnam paid no attention and poured out the words.
"You know what goes on between the chairman and me. I'm filthy. You knew I was filthy when you made me do that to you."
Her feverish head felt as though it had separated from her body and was floating somewhere in midair. Hyungnam no longer even understood what she was saying. The words spilled from her as though she were possessed.
"Good. I've never done it with a young man before. This is the perfect opportunity to try some dirty things."
"..."
"You're young, Manager Choi, so you can get it up properly, can't you? Park Shineok, that bastard—fuck, that son of a bitch has to stuff himself with aphrodisiacs, and he still can't even keep it hard. He gets it halfway inside and it goes fucking limp—"
"Hey, Hyungnam. Hey."
"I don't want to fuck a sixty-year-old man either!"
Hyungnam suddenly screamed as though she were having a fit.
Her shrill cry rang through the silent mansion, echoing again and again.
She continued babbling, as though speaking to someone who wasn't there.
"But still. The chairman pays me. He pays me a lot. Even the whores in Miari probably make less than I do."
"..."
"If I stay here just three years, I can rent a place with two rooms. Then I won't have to live in as a maid. I can work by the day instead."
"..."
"And the work here isn't even that hard. There's no mistress of the house to throw me out for sleeping with her husband. And unlike a whore, I only have to deal with one man. A minute if it's quick, three at the most..."
Hyungnam abruptly clamped her mouth shut.
Then her upper body pitched violently forward.
Covering her mouth with both hands, she ran to the bathroom. She didn't even manage to close the door before grabbing hold of the toilet and retching violently.
"Hrrrgh—hrrrgh—"
Monstrous sounds tore out of her along with it.
Even after there was nothing left in her stomach, she kept retching as though she might vomit up her organs next.
Several minutes must have passed.
Choi Eunhyung hadn't followed her into the bathroom. Nor could she hear the shameless clatter of dishes that would have meant he was sitting out there eating in the middle of all this.
Then again, what did it matter where he was or what he was doing now?
Barely able to hold up her throbbing head, Hyungnam let the last strand of sticky saliva fall from her mouth and flushed the toilet.
She braced herself against the wall and stood.
Blackness flooded her vision.
She remained there for a long while, one hand against the wall, blinking until the darkness slowly receded.
I want to lie down.
Her numb mind was incapable of thinking about anything else.
When she staggered out of the bathroom, Choi Eunhyung was no longer in the dining room.
Apparently he'd gone somewhere.
That was better.
She had no strength to deal with him pestering her, nor any strength to be scolded for her insolence.
Barely keeping hold of the consciousness that seemed ready to drift straight out through the top of her head, she somehow made it all the way to her room.
Panting, she collapsed facedown across the bed. She didn't even have the strength to take another three steps, leaving the lower half of her body sprawled on the floor.
I want to rest.
I want it to stop.
I've been defiled, and no matter what I do, I'll never be clean again.
Despair multiplied through her mind like bacteria, spreading like a plague.
Then Hyungnam's eyes suddenly flashed in the dim room.
Why didn't I think of it before?
She had found the simplest, easiest answer.
Energy suddenly surged through her listless body, and Hyungnam jerked upright. She crawled on her knees toward the low desk.
Her hands trembling as though reaching desperately for the water of life, she opened the drawer.
Inside was a new Dorco razor blade.
It was this close. There was such a simple way all along.
With trembling fingers, Hyungnam hurriedly peeled away the paper wrapping. The blade grazed her fingertip and drew blood, but she didn't even feel the pain.
Gripping the razor blade firmly in her right hand, she brought it to her left wrist without hesitation.
How deep do I have to cut to reach the artery? Choi Eunhyung would know something like that.
It was almost funny that the person who came to mind just before her death was neither her father nor Park Shineok, but Choi Eunhyung.
Hyungnam pressed down.
The keen blade broke through her skin.
At that same instant, the door behind her flew violently open.
***
A blood-soaked towel lay crumpled on the floor.
Choi Eunhyung, his face utterly expressionless, carefully pressed a fresh towel against Hyungnam's left wrist.
The sharp blade must have grazed a blood vessel, because there had been quite a bit of bleeding. Only after he had held pressure on it for a long time did the blood finally stop seeping out.
Hyungnam was completely out of it.
She sat leaning against the wall, offering him nothing but her wrist, her head tipped back. She didn't even have the strength to cry aloud, but the tears would not stop. They streamed down her neck without end.
Even after confirming that the bleeding had stopped, Eunhyung continued pressing the wound for a while.
At last, he slowly spoke.
"You little idiot. Whose life are you trying to ruin, dying in somebody else's house?"
The rebuke was mild. There wasn't the slightest trace of a scolding in his voice.
Hyungnam had been staring vacantly into space, her eyes unfocused. A thin breath escaped between her lips.
"Then where am I supposed to die?"
"..."
"I don't have a home."
Eunhyung eased the pressure of his thumb slightly.
Then came the obvious question, almost as though he were asking it merely for form's sake.
"Your parents?"
"Gone."
"Relatives? Siblings?"
"None."
"An inheritance?"
Hyungnam blinked with difficulty. Her eyes felt gritty and raw, as though someone had poured sand over them.
"I used it to pay off my father's gambling debts."
"..."
"Chairman Park Shineok paid them off."
Instead of answering, Choi Eunhyung slowly removed his hand from Hyungnam's wrist.
He had been pressing so hard that the weave of the towel was imprinted clearly into her soft skin.
Eunhyung stared at the pattern for a long while before murmuring belatedly,
"You're just like me."
"..."
"All alone in the world. Nowhere to go."
"..."
"Even down to living off the old man."