T/N(✿◠‿◠)
Before long, Shen Jiajia’s mother returned. The family of three changed into plain mourning clothes and headed out. Because the great-uncle’s home was in the countryside, Constable Shen had rented an ox cart.
Seeing this, Second Sister Zhu felt a bit of heartache over the expense. “We could have just walked. What a waste of perfectly good money.”
Since the “wasted money” was already spent, naturally there was no need to walk. However, that ox cart wasn’t much faster than walking anyway.
Carrying a basket filled with paper money and candles, Shen Jiajia climbed onto the ox cart. She had just settled in when she suddenly felt the basket sway slightly. She looked down, only to see the white cloth covering the basket bulging up. Immediately after, a tiny head poked out from underneath.
Little red cheeks and a tuft of feathers pointing straight to the sky—if it wasn’t that parrot Chengfeng, who else could it be?
Xie Chengfeng shook his skyward tuft, twisting his head to look left and right.
Second Sister Zhu let out an “Ah!” and pointed at him. “Third Sister, how is it still alive? What kind of trick are you pulling now?”
Shen Jiajia just chuckled slyly.
Second Sister Zhu figured it out after a moment’s thought. Tapping her daughter’s forehead with her index finger, she chided, “You, ah, you!”
Xie Chengfeng had sneaked along precisely to gather some information. He wanted to know if his human self was currently alive or dead. If he wasn’t dead, was his body occupied by some other soul? Could it be… occupied by this parrot?
If a bird had moved into his body… He didn’t dare to imagine it.
He didn’t hear any useful news along the way. It was all just local village gossip, street hawkers crying out their wares, or people tearing into each other with vulgar curses. Finding it all a bit boring, Xie Chengfeng unknowingly drifted off to sleep.
When he woke up again, he realized Shen Jiajia was currently fishing him out of the basket with a single hand.
To think that he, Xie Chengfeng—master of both the pen and the sword, an exceptional archer who rarely met his match in a fight—was now being dangled by a young girl with one hand! What an absolute humiliation! A downright disgrace!
Shen Jiajia originally wanted to hide Chengfeng in her sleeve, but worried she might smother him. Thus, she stuffed him into the front folds of her robes, leaving only his little head exposed.
Xie Chengfeng silently climbed out, scaled her clothes up to her shoulder, and stood there.
Shen Jiajia simply let him be.
After burning the paper money and kowtowing in respect, Second Sister Zhu chatted with their relatives while Shen Jiajia went to find the girls of her clan to play. Today, she had brought along a novel, beautiful parrot, so children of all ages surrounded her, chattering away excitedly. For a moment, she completely stole the spotlight.
Xie Chengfeng was getting quite impatient. Standing on Shen Jiajia’s shoulder, he narrowed his eyes and pretended to sleep. But there just had to be those lacking any tact, who wouldn’t just stop at chattering but actually reached out to poke him.
Xie Chengfeng snapped in annoyance, “Don’t touch me.”
“Hehehe, it’s angry!”
“…”
Shen Jiajia raised a hand to shield him, explaining, “He’s a little sick today. You can all just look, but please don’t touch.”
Someone refused to listen to reason, shouting loudly, “I wanna touch it! Give it to me to play with!” The voice was milky and childish.
Shen Jiajia looked closely and saw it was her Second Uncle’s youngest son, called Seventh Brother. He was barely three years old this year, yet despite his tender age, he had quite a domineering temper.
Currently, he was being carried in his older sister’s arms. Shen Jiajia raised her hand, wanting to pat his head, when her gaze casually drifted over him. She saw that both of his sleeves were filthy, caked with what looked like two thick layers of mud, and a trail of snot hung just under his nose. Following her gaze, he naturally lifted his sleeve and wiped it across his face.
Who knew how much snot he had to wipe to get his sleeves that dirty.
Shen Jiajia pulled her hand back and joked, “My parrot is an exotic import from overseas, worth ten taels of silver. If you take out ten taels right now, I’ll let you play with it.”
Seventh Brother scrunched up his face, ready to cry.
His sister laughed, “Just let our Seventh Brother touch it once. He’s very clean, he won’t break your little treasure.” Saying this, she hitched Seventh Brother a bit higher and leaned in toward Shen Jiajia.
Before Shen Jiajia could even react, Xie Chengfeng’s feathers puffed up in absolute horror. He scrambled backward on Shen Jiajia’s shoulder, nearly tumbling off, clearly scared out of his wits. As he retreated, he shrieked, “Go away, you country bumpkin!”
That single phrase—”country bumpkin”—plunged the entire crowd into a collective silence.
Most of the people present lived in the countryside. Factually speaking, they all qualified as the “country bumpkins” Xie Chengfeng was referring to. Even Shen Jiajia, who lived in the city, was nothing more than a commoner and didn’t exactly have the standing to go around calling others bumpkins.
Shen Jiajia’s bird calling everyone country bumpkins was essentially the same as Shen Jiajia insulting them herself.
Shen Third Sister, just how noble do you think you are?
Under the crowd’s distinctly unfriendly glares, Shen Jiajia awkwardly flicked Chengfeng’s head. “Don’t speak nonsense,” she scolded him, before proceeding to apologize to everyone.
However, the words were already spoken, feelings were already hurt, and the damage couldn’t be undone. Seventh Brother was carried away crying by his sister. The siblings felt incredibly wronged and immediately turned to their mother to tattle.
“She said we need ten taels of silver just to touch it, and even called us country bumpkins!”
Shen Jiajia’s Second Aunt had a fiery temper. Upon hearing this, she flew into a towering rage. She slapped her daughter right across the face and cursed, “You little hussy! Who told you to eagerly stick your face over there just to get scolded! That girl is destined to climb up high branches and become a titled lady of rank in the future, what the hell do you count for?!”
This scared both siblings into a synchronized wail.
Second Aunt Shen still didn’t feel satisfied even after her tirade. She stepped out, intending to go to the latrine, when a fellow villager pulled her aside on the way, whispering, “My, my, my, that niece of yours, Shen Third Sister, is growing prettier by the day! Is she betrothed yet?”
Second Aunt Shen sneered coldly, “Her? Don’t even dream about it.”
“Oh?”
“You probably haven’t met our sister-in-law’s son. He’s a man of striking appearance and exceptionally well-read. He’s taking the provincial exams next year and the imperial exams the year after. Third Sister is just waiting for him to get his name on the golden roll so they can marry!”
“Ah? If he really passes the imperial exams, he’d be perfectly suited to match with a high official’s daughter. Why on earth, why on earth…” Why on earth would he marry a girl from a humble background?
“Heh, that’s what you don’t understand. Third Sister is educated, you see. Us folks, ah, in their eyes we’re all just country bumpkins, rustic hicks! We certainly can’t indulge in such wishful thinking!”
Murmur, murmur, whisper, whisper…
The two of them chattered away merrily, entirely unaware of Second Sister Zhu standing on the other side of the corner wall.
Second Sister Zhu didn’t mean to eavesdrop; she just happened to stumble upon it. Hearing them mock and belittle her daughter, she felt both anxious and furious, as well as deeply perplexed. She wanted to step out and argue back, but alas, she was clumsy with words. Even if she went, she’d only be inviting her own humiliation.
Unable to bear listening any longer, she turned around, covered her eyes, and quickly walked away.
Shen Jiajia noticed something was very wrong with her mother. Her eyes were red, and she was sitting there gloomily, totally zoned out while the people around her chatted.
“Mother, I want to go back,” she said.
“Ah? Let’s go home then.”
And so, without even staying for dinner, the family of three hurriedly drove their ox cart back home.
On the way, Second Sister Zhu didn’t hide anything. She picked through the things she had heard and recounted them to Shen Jiajia.
Xie Chengfeng was forced to listen to a whole saga of country bumpkin grudges and drama. It was such a messy affair that he wished he could just slice his own ears off.
After Second Sister Zhu finished, she hesitated slightly. “About your cousin…”
Shen Jiajia twitched her lips. “Mother, I’m still young. I’m in no rush to get married.”
“You’re already seventeen, you’re not young anymore,” Second Sister Zhu patted her hand and consoled her. “Don’t you worry. Mother has prepared a large dowry for you; no one will dare look down on you.”
Hearing this, Shen Jiajia burst into laughter. “Pfft!”
Second Sister Zhu asked in surprise, “What are you laughing at?”
Driving the cart at the front, Constable Shen also glanced back at her.
Shen Jiajia said, “Mother, why do you think Second Aunt gnashes her teeth at me so fiercely? Do you really think it’s just because my parrot called Seventh Brother a country bumpkin?”
Xie Chengfeng thought to himself, I am certainly not yours.
“Then why do you think it is?” Second Sister Zhu asked.
“Second Aunt has always wanted to adopt Seventh Brother over to Father. She’s simply terrified that when I get married, my dowry will be too thick and I’ll take away the family property. And here you are, bringing up my dowry.”
These words brought a look of sudden realization to both husband and wife.
Constable Shen scoffed, “What adoption? Your mother is still young, she can still give birth.”
Blushing, Second Sister Zhu spat playfully, “Don’t spout such nonsense right in front of the child!”
The ox cart creaked and rattled its way into the city. By now, the sun was setting behind the western hills. The red-gold sunlight poured gently over the mortal realm, gilding everyone with a layer of warmth. There was still quite a distance from the city gates to their home. Afraid that his wife and daughter would go hungry, Constable Shen stopped the cart to buy a few pastries by the roadside. Made from white flour and brown sugar, sprinkled with sesame and melon seeds, the pastries weren’t exactly refined, but they were fragrant and sweet. Shen Jiajia leaned lazily against her mother as she ate. Two pastries down the hatch, and they had arrived home.
Second Sister Zhu’s mood had long since improved. She smiled, “I don’t need to work tonight. Tell Mother what you want to eat, and I’ll make it for you.”
“I love eating whatever you make, Mother. I’ll be your helper.”
“No need, your Father can be my helper. Go back to your room and rest.”
Shen Jiajia cupped Xie Chengfeng in her hands and returned to her own room.
This was Xie Chengfeng’s first time entering a young maiden’s boudoir. Finding it improper to look around randomly, he politely kept his head lowered.
Shen Jiajia broke off a tiny crumb of pastry and held it out to him. “Are you hungry?”
Xie Chengfeng lowered his head and pecked at the melon seed on the pastry. As he ate, he critiqued, “Too much sugar, it’s a bit cloying.”
Shen Jiajia turned around, grabbed a jar from her shelf, and tossed a handful of unpeeled melon seeds onto the table. “Try these, they’re raw.”
Xie Chengfeng looked down at the seeds, quite dissatisfied. “If you don’t peel them for me, how am I supposed to eat them?”
Shen Jiajia had no choice but to crack open a seed, extracting the kernel to give to him.
Xie Chengfeng turned his head away in disgust. “It’s stained with your saliva. I’m not eating it.”
Shen Jiajia grew a little impatient and tossed her head. “Eat it or don’t, I’m not your servant girl.”
Xie Chengfeng was caught a little off guard. “Do you have a dog’s face? Flipping your mood faster than flipping a page!”
She ignored him.
Xie Chengfeng pretended to look around the room, secretly observing her expression. Seeing some books resting on a shelf, he tried to strike up a conversation out of nothing: “What kind of books do you usually read?”
Right at that moment, a sudden cry of distress erupted from her parents’ room.
Shen Jiajia scrambled up in a panic and ran out. Xie Chengfeng hopped from the table to the chair, and from the chair to the floor, before finally churning his two short little legs to waddle furiously after her.
Shen Jiajia burst headfirst into the room, only to see her mother sitting slumped on the floor. In front of her was an open chest, its contents tossed about in a chaotic mess.
Constable Shen was trying to help her up, coaxing her gently, “Get up first, the floor is cold.”
Shen Jiajia also hurried forward to help her mother. “What’s going on?”
Through tear-blurred eyes, Second Sister Zhu looked at her. “Third Sister, the dowry… your entire dowry has been stolen!”
Translator’s Anecdote: Our majestic male lead really went from nearly getting snot-wiped by a toddler to speed-waddling on two tiny bird legs just to chase after his cranky new owner. 🏃♂️🦜💨💅