I left the building and exhaled a heated breath. In the cold night wind, the white cloud of it shattered. The place was quiet, with streetlights spaced sparsely apart.
Feeling a bright light, I turned my head and saw a vending machine set off in one corner. I paid with my phone and got an ion drink. Then I wedged myself into a corner near the vending machine, partly to sort out my thoughts. Humming a Full Moon Angel OST, I hooked my nail under the tab and opened the can.
A sound rang out that cleared my chest.
I drank as much as my thirst demanded, and before long, less than half was left. Leaning against the wall, I looked up at the night sky. I slowly breathed in and out. Lee Sehan wasn’t as much of a dim bastard as my first impression had suggested. He must have planned it. He was a bastard who knew very well how to win favor, show ability, and stand out. Even if he really had chosen a girl-group song for the reason he’d said—to stand out—there was still something that bothered me.
I cut off the song I’d been humming.
The sound of footsteps approaching nearby grew clearer. An all-too-familiar figure turned the corner and stopped in front of me.
The one who appeared with the ash-gray crescent moon at his back was that pervert bastard from the shared bathroom. I’d thought he’d been staring at me hotly all day, and apparently this bastard had no idea where to stop. I smiled crookedly and drained the rest of my drink.
“Huh…? Park Yuha, why are you here?”
This fucking pervert bastard had followed me and was pretending he hadn’t? I crushed the empty can and stepped right up to him, shoving my face close.
“You were staring at me so passionately, and now you followed me all the way here?”
“What kind of bullshit is that?! Back off, would you?!”
“If you want to call it bullshit, maybe do something about that face of yours first. It’s way too obvious you’re so happy you could die.”
The bastard stammered, his face bright red. Had he seriously been imagining some cliché like that? Acting like we’d run into each other by chance, acting like he hated me, acting embarrassed, and using that to start building a bond with the male lead or whatever?
I took one step away from him and made the most disgusted face I could.
“Stalking is a crime, you fucking bastard.”
“I told you it’s not like that! Why would I stalk something like you?! A bastard who treats people like they’re beneath him…!”
“Then why did you join this team? What are you after? Don’t spew some pathetic bullshit like Lee Sehan.”
I threw the crushed can into the trash. Then I stepped in front of the pervert bastard and studied his face. Even if he really did like me that fucking much, joining this team was a little suspicious. He could be a sick fucking pervert who genuinely wanted the “cunty diva” concept, but he could also be in league with Lee Sehan. Better to keep every possibility open.
The pervert bastard panicked and avoided my eyes.
Was something pricking his conscience? Or was he just excited because I was looking at him?
The more I thought about him, the filthier he made me feel. This goddamn pervert bastard had definitely jerked off to me after seeing me in the bathroom. I was considering how to crush him when the pervert bastard spoke in a voice thick with nerves.
“Seonghyeon Middle School, first year, Class Two… I was in the same class as you. You really don’t remember?”
“I vividly remember that you’re a sick pervert. You jerked off to me, you fucking bastard.”
“N… no, I didn’t?! Thanks to a certain someone I almost became a eunuch, and you think I could jerk, jerk off, fuck!”
“Why are you stammering so much? You jerked off, you goddamn bastard.”
When I said it with certainty, the pervert bastard went pale and backed away.
“No, could you listen until I’m done for once…! I was staring back then not because I’m a pervert, but because I wanted to pick a fight with you… No, I mean, I couldn’t believe a bastard like you became an idol, and then you even showed up on a program like this, so I fucking wanted to curse you out… Anyway, I’m not a pervert.”
The pervert bastard rambled on with no fucking order, as if he wanted to advertise that he was lying.
Whether that bastard was a pervert or not, I understood that he didn’t like me being an idol. Was that why he’d stared at me like that and run his mouth like a lunatic?
Expressionless, I studied his face. Now even worthless little things were picking fights with me.
The bastard kept talking about first year of middle school, but there was no human like him in my memory. Which meant he’d been someone completely insignificant. How was I supposed to remember every bastard like that? It wasn’t as if there had only been one or two morons who’d bothered me while calling themselves bullies. Among them, one son of a bitch had even tried to get under my skin by shoving disgusting shit into my locker.
I looked at him and asked flatly.
“What’s your name?”
“We introduced ourselves earlier, but you didn’t care at all, did you? You really are still an obnoxious prick.”
“So what is it?”
“…Shin Giyoung.”
I put on an indifferent expression. I’d find out once I got the investigation files from my younger uncle. If this bastard really was one of the bullies I’d beaten up, he had a use. If Park Yuhyeon exposed Kang Yejun as gay, then I could roughly cover it by exposing that this bastard had been a bully.
“Got it.”
“What…? That’s it?”
“What else am I supposed to do? What did you want from me when you came up pretending to know me?”
“…What I want? Are you going to do it if I say it?”
Shin Giyoung sneered.
“You think you’re valuable enough to me for that?”
Why was this bastard getting his hopes up over something I’d asked without thinking? Earlier, during the discussion, he’d asked how I was going to persuade him too. For some reason, he seemed furious; he bowed his head deeply, clenched his fists, and trembled.
I left him there and walked past.
Then I stopped.
I needed to crush that bastard. Whether that fucking bastard was an old classmate or whatever, it was true that he’d stared at me with pervert eyes. He’d obviously masturbated to me too. How should I kill that fucking bastard?
I turned around and headed back toward him, only to wonder what the hell he was doing now.
The pervert bastard was crying in the most hideous way imaginable. With that bear-like build, he was spilling tears and snot everywhere. When I looked at him, he cried even louder on purpose, as if he wanted me to hear.
Wondering what kind of bastard this even was, I took out my phone. Things like this needed to be recorded as video and treasured for a long time. I was still getting mileage out of a video from high school where a bastard from my group cross-dressed and did a godawful dance. Sending him the video whenever I got bored was fucking hilarious because his reactions were so good.
The pervert bastard on my phone screen sniffled and opened his mouth.
“I, hic, still remember so vividly when you beat up that shitty bully bastard… How I was back then, sniff…! But you only went around with that bastard…! Even when I brought you all kinds of things because I wanted to get close to you, you ignored me!”
“So you’ve been stalking me since then.”
“Stalking…! It wasn’t like that! When I was in high school and you suddenly said you were becoming an idol, hic, hnnngh!!!”
The pervert bastard burst into sobs.
I zoomed in on his philtrum twitching as he tried to swallow his snot.
Ugh, fuck, that was filthy.
Disgusted, I pulled the close-up back and filmed his face. The pervert bastard spoke with a face that looked ready to explode any second.
“You have no idea how stunned I was back then! My dream of going to the same university as you and getting a job at the same place as you was shattered in an instant… Fine, okay, I could accept that much. I figured you’d get sick of it soon and quit! But then you came on a program like this…!”
“So you became a trainee and followed me here? What a persistent stalker bastard.”
“I said my feelings were pure!”
The bastard shouted as if exploding with frustration. His face said he found it deeply unfair that I was treating him like a low-grade stalker pervert. Huffing, he spat out his story in a rapid stream.
“I got too big, so that must be why you don’t recognize me. I suddenly grew taller in my second year of high school. Before then, I was small. Because of that, those so-called bully bastards messed with me a lot. I thought things would change when I got to middle school, but my luck was fucking awful. I ended up in the same class in first year of middle school with the bully who’d tormented me since elementary school. I’d just resigned myself, thinking, Now I’m fucked, and then you transferred in, Park Yuha.”
Shin Giyoung inhaled and clasped both hands together.
“That entrance was, in a word, a comet! Oh my Jesus! Yuha, you smashed that bully bastard’s face in so satisfyingly! It was fucking, fucking, fucking… Back then, I really lost it. When little shits watched porn and said they were losing it, losing it, that was the first time I understood. So this is what losing it feels like… Yeah. Yuha, you made me lose it down to my soul.”
“……”
“As with all fated meetings, tragically, you had no interest in me. Still, I thought if I tried hard enough, something would work out! Because we were destiny! A man’s most important place! Thinking of that, I put bright red panties in your locker. I was sure you’d love them and ask who’d put them there… but you cursed and threw them in that bully bastard’s face. Since your nipples are precious, when I put nipple patches in, you stripped that bully bastard’s shirt off and stuck them on him!”
The bastard’s face twisted, and he got angry like he was having a fit.
“From then on, I hated that bully bastard who became your slave so much I wanted to kill him! What the hell was that bastard? What the hell was he?! Why did every gift I gave you get thrown at him?! Why wouldn’t you even look at me?!”
“……”
“…Even after that, you never showed the slightest interest in me. But I still held on stubbornly. The person who’d go to the same university as you, get the same job as you, and in the end have his clothes stripped off by you so nipple patches could be stuck on him would be me! I endured with that one thought alone…! And then you debuted as an idol… My comet, my hero, God Yuha, and I would have to share you with everyone and fight until we were bleeding!”
The bastard clutched at his hair, then soon smiled radiantly.
“But I was relieved! Because ordinary people didn’t recognize your insane charm…! I also thought you’d get bored soon. But then you came on a program like this?!”
“……”
“Fine, that can’t be helped either! Being impossible to predict is part of your charm too! So I was going to start from the beginning! You only dealt with bastards who picked fights with you, so I tried to pick a fight with you like that too, pant, so I could become your slave, pant, pant… But why won’t you look at me…? Huh? Yuha… haah…”
I stopped recording on my phone.
Then I stared coldly at the bastard as he panted, eyes shining with madness.
This goddamn fucking pervert bastard…