JAY POV DAY THREE.
The moment I woke up, I remembered where we were going.
the amusement park.I got ready quickly and went downstairs, where everyone was already gathering.Ella was practically jumping around.
“We’re finally going!” she said ( BEFORE YOU ASK , YES SOPHIA AND ELLA ARE JAY FRIEND ) Sophia looked half asleep.
“You’ve been awake for five minutes.” she said “And?” i said “And you’re already screaming.” she said Ella laughed.
I shook my head.
Then I saw Kiefer standing near the entrance.
He was looking at his phone, but the second he noticed me, he put it away.
“Morning,” he said.
“Morning.” i said He looked at me.
“You ready?” he asked “I think so.” i said He smiled.
“You think so?” he said “I might change my mind when I see the rides.” i said He laughed.
And kissed the tip of my nose Then forehead “You’ll be fine.” he said We got onto the bus.
The whole ride there was loud.Everyone was talking about which rides they wanted to try.Ella had already made a list.Sophia kept telling her she was insane.I sat beside Kiefer.We talked almost the entire way there.
Sometimes about the trip.
Sometimes about university.
Sometimes about absolutely nothing.
“Kiefer,” I said.
“Yes?” he said “Do you remember when we used to go to that tiny park near our old house?” i said He laughed.
“Where you always fell off the swing?” he said “I did not fall.” i said “You definitely fell.” he said “I jumped.” i said “You screamed.” he said “I was eight!” i said He laughed.
I pushed his shoulder.
“Stop.” i said He smiled.
“I remember.” he said The amusement park came into view.
Everyone started cheering.
The moment we got off the bus, Ella grabbed my hand.
“Come on!” “Where?” i asked “First ride.” She pulled me toward one of the biggest roller coasters.
I stopped.
“No.” Ella turned around.
“Yes.” she said “No.” Kiefer came over.
“Scared?” he said I looked at him.
“Maybe.” i said He smiled.
“I’ll be beside you.” he siad That was enough.
We got in line.
The ride was terrifying.
I screamed.
Kiefer screamed too.
When we got off, I was holding onto his arm so tight He laughed.
“You okay?” he said I looked at him.
“I hate you.” i said He laughed.
“No, you don’t.” he said I couldn’t help but smile.
We spent the rest of the day going around the park.
We played games.
We tried different rides.
We bought food.
At one game, Kiefer insisted on winning me a stuffed animal.
“Kiefer, don’t waste your money.” i said “I’m going to win.” he said “You said that three times.” i said “And I’m going to win this time.” he siad He tried.
He missed.
I laughed.
He tried again.
This time, he won.
He handed me the stuffed animal.
“For you.” he said I looked at it.
Then at him.
“Thank you.” i said He smiled.
“Anything for you my lady ” he said My heart felt warm.
Later, we sat near the lake inside the park.
The noise of the amusement park felt far away.
Kiefer looked at me.
“You having fun?” he said I nodded.
“Yeah.” He took my hand.
I looked at our fingers.
“I wish every day could be like this.” i said He smiled.
“Maybe it can.” he said I looked at him.
“What?” i said He squeezed my hand.
“Maybe we can make more days like this.” he siad I smiled.
“I’d like that.” i said He leaned over and kissed the top of my head.
I closed my eyes.
For a moment, I felt completely safe.
I thought about how strange our story was.
We had been childhood friends.
Then he left.
Years passed.
And somehow, after everything…
we found our way back.
I rested my head against his shoulder.
Maybe I had spent too much time worrying about losing him.
Because right now, he was here.
With me.
And I wanted to enjoy every second.
LILY POV I didn’t want to go.
I told Ella that before we even left.
“I’m staying here.” Ella looked at me.
“No, you’re not.” she said “I don’t want to go.
i said “You haven’t wanted to go anywhere for days.” she said I looked away.
“Because I don’t feel like it.” i said Sophia stood beside her.
“Lily, please come with us.” she said I shook my head.
“I don’t want to.” i said Ella sighed.
Then she looked at me seriously.
“You’re losing yourself over a boy.” she said I went quiet.
The words hurt.
Because I knew they were true.
I looked down.
“I know.” i said “Then don’t let him take everything from you.” she said I didn’t answer.
Sophia reached for my hand.
“Come with us.” I finally nodded.
But I didn’t want to go.
I went because they asked me to.
Not because I wanted to.
The amusement park was loud.
Too loud.
Music.
People screaming.
Children laughing.
Couples walking around together.
Everyone looked happy.
I just felt tired.
Ella tried to get me to go on a ride.
“Come on, Lily.” she said “No.” i said “Just one.” she said “I don’t want to.” i said She looked at me.
“Please.” she said I shook my head.
“Go without me.” i said She didn’t.
She stayed beside me.
Sophia did too.
I watched everyone around me having fun.
But I couldn’t feel any of it.
Then I saw him.
Kiefer.
My heart stopped for a second.
He was with Jay.
She was holding his hand.
He was smiling at her.
She leaned against him.
He kissed the top of her head.
I looked away.
I didn’t want to see it.
But my eyes went back anyway.
Why did it hurt this much?
I knew.
I already knew he loved her.
I knew he wasn’t mine.
But knowing something and accepting it were two completely different things.
My hands started shaking.
I put them into my pockets.
I didn’t want Ella or Sophia to notice.
I heard them laughing somewhere behind me.
I couldn’t understand how everyone could be so happy while I felt like something inside me was breaking.
I sat down on a bench.
Sophia sat beside me.
“You okay?” she asked I nodded.
“Yeah.” i said She knew I was lying.
“You don’t have to pretend with us.” she said I looked down.
“I just want to go back.” i said Ella sat beside me.
“We can.” she said I shook my head.
“No.” i said “Then what do you want?” she asked I didn’t know.
I honestly didn’t know.
I wanted Kiefer.
I wanted him to look at me the way he looked at Jay.
I wanted him to choose me.
I wanted everything to go back to when I didn’t have to watch him love someone else.
But I knew none of that was going to happen.
So I just sat there.
Quiet.
Watching everyone enjoy themselves.
I didn’t laugh.
I didn’t smile.
I didn’t even feel like pretending.
At one point, I saw Kiefer and Jay sitting together near the lake.
He was holding her hand.
She was resting her head on his shoulder.
They looked happy.
I looked away.
A tear slipped down my cheek.
I quickly wiped it.
I hated myself for crying over someone who wasn’t mine.
I hated that I couldn’t control my feelings.
And most of all…
I hated that the more I tried to let him go, the more I felt like I was losing myself.
Ella put her arm around me.
I leaned against her quietly.
I didn’t say anything.
Neither did she.
She just stayed.
And somehow, that was the only thing I could handle.