The countdown on the wall read “0”.
There was no cake on the table to celebrate You Fu’s coming of age, only a spread of steaming dishes announcing today’s farewell.
The meal was prepared by Ji An, who was currently picking at the peppercorns on his plate, bored out of his mind.
He had no plans to touch You Fu’s room. When You Fu finished school on weekends with nowhere else to go, he could still come back to stay. Ji An could graciously allow him to stay until he graduated high school.
Though he disliked him and wished he would leave quickly, after all, he had raised him for five years. It was only fitting to part ways with some dignity.
Once all the paperwork was completed, he would receive that ten million. It wouldn’t take long.
It was a figure he had never dared to dream of before, yet it didn’t bring the joy he had imagined.
Ten million, a number he had no right to touch, felt like an endless ocean shrouded in mist. He sat on a small boat, drifting with the current, unsure of where it would take him.
Confusion, chaos.
He thought achieving his goal would bring him the feeling of sweet relief after hardship, thought he would laugh madly like a man who had passed the imperial exam.
But his heart felt dead and silent.
The clock’s hour hand moved to “9”.
The sound of a password being entered came from outside. Ji An forcibly cut off his wild thoughts and added rice to an empty bowl.
You Fu changed into slippers with ease, showing no reaction to his impending departure.
Ji An was about to call him to eat when he saw a round-faced, big-eyed girl with a high ponytail following You Fu. She was holding a teddy bear.
Ji An recognized the girl, it was Xiao Jiaruan.
“No need to change shoes,” You Fu told her.
In the moment Ji An was taken aback, You Fu had already brought Xiao Jiaruan over to him. “She knows it’s my birthday today and wanted to come celebrate with me.”
Xiao Jiaruan handed the teddy bear to You Fu as a birthday gift, smiling politely as she greeted Ji An. “Ji An, we’ve met before.”
Ji An felt a vague dissatisfaction, not understanding why You Fu hadn’t mentioned bringing someone over, but he politely said to her, “Welcome, I’ll go get another set of dishes.”
When Ji An returned from the kitchen, Xiao Jiaruan was happily chatting with You Fu, who was slightly bent over to listen, maintaining a certain distance from her.
It was a perfectly normal scene, with no change in atmosphere. You Fu still wore that lifeless expression, and Ji An was displeased.
There was an inexplicable desire for You Fu to never have a friend, to live in pain and numbness.
He didn’t want You Fu to have a good life, at least not better than his own.
He disliked You Fu, wanting him to be as loathed as a rat scurrying across the street.
In some way, he wanted to ruin You Fu, just as his own life had been stripped of hope, living like a walking corpse every day.
He had lived to raise You Fu and get that ten million, but what about after raising You Fu?
The once clear path was now shrouded in thick fog, covering his eyes and ears.
His future seemed only filled with confusion.
He despicably hoped You Fu would become a walking corpse like him, with a future as uncertain as his own.
Ji An’s expression remained unchanged as he urged them to wash their hands and prepare to eat.
Originally, Ji An had some things to say to You Fu, but now he only occasionally responded to Xiao Jiaruan’s lively chatter at the table.
Xiao Jiaruan was like a bright little bird, singing from the treetops, and no one disliked a lively little bird.
Except for those who found the bird noisy.
Ji An served Xiao Jiaruan a few dishes, trying to get her to quiet down.
“Thank you, Ji An!” Xiao Jiaruan beamed, animatedly talking to You Fu about a boy in their class. “Oh, when Mr. Li’s face turned stern, he immediately wilted. Didn’t you see his expression, hahaha…”
You Fu: “I saw it.”
Xiao Jiaruan: “You saw it and didn’t laugh? It was so funny. You should smile more, you look better when you do.”
Ji An poked at the rice in his bowl, over and over, unaware that the girl’s topic had changed, or that she had called his name several times. “Ji An, Ji An?”
“Hmm?” Ji An blurted out, “Funny.”
The lively atmosphere at the table suddenly dropped, and Ji An sensed something was off, even You Fu looked at him.
Xiao Jiaruan was puzzled. “Ji An, we were talking about my uncle’s new house that you’re designing.”
“Hmm?” Ji An was taken aback. “Your uncle’s house?”
“Yes, my dad told me you’re the designer for my uncle’s house.”
Ji An pulled up a chat on his phone and handed it to her. “Is this your uncle?”
“Yes.” Xiao Jiaruan hesitated for a moment before asking, “Um… my uncle said I could help with my cousin’s bedroom design. Can I come to discuss the design requirements with you, Ji An? Also… I have some questions I don’t understand, could You Fu help me with them?”
Her words were full of holes, and anyone could see what she meant. Xiao Jiaruan knew her words were bold, almost a direct confession.
But she really wanted to be closer to the person she liked. Recently, their class had changed seats, putting them almost at opposite ends, and their interactions had decreased.
You Fu was naturally reserved, and Xiao Jiaruan was worried about how to close the distance with the person she liked. Mentioning her uncle as Ji An’s client was a small ploy, hoping Ji An would agree out of courtesy.
Ji An wasn’t so kind. He wouldn’t give face to anyone who displeased him. He was about to refuse when he heard You Fu say, “I’m going to live at…”
Before You Fu could finish saying “school,” Ji An changed his mind without thinking and interrupted, “Sure.”
Xiao Jiaruan: “Really? Thank you so much!”
You Fu frowned slightly.
Ji An cursed him in his mind, ‘Why are you frowning? Letting you continue to live here is my great mercy. You should be kneeling and thanking me.’
But You Fu didn’t follow the script. “I won’t be living here anymore…”
“Shut up!” Ji An raised his voice to cut him off, putting a piece of meat in his bowl. “Can you shut your mouth while eating? You’re so talkative.”
You Fu tilted his head, seemingly not understanding his words.
Ji An, with a hidden smile, pressed his foot down on You Fu’s under the table. “Eat.”
You Fu silently closed his mouth, putting the piece of meat into his mouth, only to find it was a piece of ginger, the spicy taste dancing on his tongue.
After dinner, they saw Xiao Jiaruan off.
You Fu cleaned up the dishes while Ji An watched from the sofa.
After washing the dishes, You Fu tore the countdown off the wall, threw it in the trash, and went into his bedroom without saying a word to Ji An.
Ji An thought he was going to do homework, but then he heard the sound of packing. His eyelid twitched, and he irritably kicked open the ajar bedroom door. “Are you brainless? Can’t understand human speech?”
You Fu simply tossed a few clothes into a suitcase. “I’m an adult now.”
“So what?”
You Fu didn’t answer, instead asking, “Didn’t you get the ten million?”
“What’s that got to do with anything?”
You Fu finally looked at him. “The point is, I should leave. I shouldn’t call you ‘brother.’ Our past familiarity doesn’t interfere with us going our separate ways.”
Ji An hated this attitude of his, acting indifferent even if the world were ending.
“I agreed with Xiao Jiaruan. If you leave, then what? Who will she come to? You don’t think she just wants to see me, do you?”
You Fu crouched to organize the clothes in his suitcase. “I’ll explain it to her tomorrow.”
“Are you forcing me?!” Ji An couldn’t take it anymore and roared, throwing the phone in his hand at You Fu’s face.
The phone clattered to the ground, and You Fu stopped moving, his pale face reddening from the impact.
The room’s air became so oppressive that Ji An could hardly breathe.
You Fu stood up, the atmosphere around him thick and sticky with disdain. He approached Ji An, slightly bending to meet his eyes. “You’re the one forcing me. You’ve always been forcing me. You’re the one who wants me gone, but you’re also the one stopping me. What do you want?”
What did he want? Ji An didn’t know. He was just annoyed. Once You Fu moved to the dorm, he’d live under the same roof with roommates, not him. You Fu would inevitably interact with them, meet more people, make more friends.
Ji An hated that.
He felt You Fu was his possession, despicably wanting only he could touch, scold, and humiliate You Fu.
The ten million was his reward for raising You Fu, not for erasing his hatred.
Since he still hated You Fu, why should You Fu take that hatred and move on to a new life?
You Fu was so excellent, so young, a peerless presence among his age group, with a bright future ahead.
Unlike him, whose life was only work, a life that could be seen at a glance.
You Fu should rot, rot in Ji An’s hands, emitting a stench of decay until no one dared approach him.
You Fu’s eyes reflected Ji An’s face filled with selfish hatred. He said, “You’ve already got the ten million, yet you still won’t let me go. You don’t want me to have a good life?”
Ji An coldly replied, “No, I don’t.”
He was just bad, despicable, selfish.
He just didn’t want to see You Fu happy, he liked the feeling of trampling him into the mud.
Even if You Fu wasn’t bound by the will to belong to Ji An, even if You Fu should gain freedom.
He just wanted to destroy him at all costs.
You Fu straightened up, lifting Ji An’s chin to ensure they maintained eye contact. “Ji An, you know, I’m an adult now. We have no relationship. You have no right to bind me. Even if I stay now, what about later?”
Ji An pressed his lips tightly, pushing away the hand on his chin.
You Fu asked, “Between freedom and you, which do you think I’m more inclined to choose?”
Ji An’s tightly pressed lips turned into a tight bite, his teeth seemingly biting into bitterness. The answer was obvious, You Fu wanted to escape his control.
Ji An countered, “Do you think freedom can be measured by money?”
You Fu hadn’t expected him to ask that and answered without thinking, “Of course not.”
Ji An smirked coldly, his eyes icy as he stared at You Fu. “Yeah, it can’t. I raised you right after graduating college, you took five years of my freedom, how will you repay that?”
You Fu shook his head. “We’re different. Back then, you didn’t have the choice, but I do.”
Ji An asked, “What do you want? What will make you give up freedom and choose me?”
You Fu said, “You need to put a time limit on your demands, offer some compensation, make it worthwhile for me to stay and serve you. Otherwise, why should I willingly endure your treatment?”
His words were still so light, so superior, and honestly, Ji An wanted to hit him.
But You Fu’s words were indeed correct.
Ji An took a deep breath, trying to maintain the dignity that You Fu had pierced. “At least wait until Xiao Jiaruan’s uncle’s house design is done. I don’t easily go back on my word.”
“And the compensation?”
“I’ll cover your living expenses from now until college starts, ten thousand a month, is that enough?”
You Fu seemed a bit disdainful. “Didn’t you say? Freedom can’t be measured by money.”
Ji An couldn’t take it anymore, grabbing his collar and shouting, “Then what do you want me to do?!”
You Fu half-closed his eyes, long lashes shading a hint of a triumphant smile, firmly grasping the hand on his collar. “Brother, I never asked to stay. You’re the one insisting I stay.”
Ji An, it’s you who can’t let go of me.
“Then fulfill one request of mine,” You Fu said.
Ji An’s hand was enveloped in coldness as he asked, “What request?”
“I haven’t thought of it yet, I’ll tell you later.”
Ji An didn’t want to argue about anything else. He kicked You Fu away and bent down to pick up his phone with a cracked screen. “Go kneel.”
You Fu obediently walked out of the room and knelt in front of the sofa.
Author’s note:
You Fu’s inner thoughts: I want to stay by my brother’s side, I must stay by my brother’s side, the world without my brother isn’t complete, I want my brother, I want Ji An, I can’t live without my brother.
You Fu’s words: You’re forcing me to stay, I’m not willing, you need to compensate me.