A sweet scent that felt like it was about to suffocate me filled the air around us. For a moment, my mind grew hazy as if I were dreaming, and I felt my vision blur. I couldn’t immediately grasp what was happening. My brain seemed completely frozen. I just blinked, dazed, when Lucien spoke.
“How is it?”
“...What?”
Still foggy in my head, I asked blankly. He let out a soft chuckle. Waiting silently, Lucien whispered in an even lower voice.
“I kissed you.”
“Uh, uh...”
I wanted to ask why all of a sudden, but no words came out. My head wasn’t functioning properly, and somehow my body wouldn’t move as I wanted. My tongue felt like a stone, unable to move. Seeing me like that, Lucien still smiled and asked,
“Why do you think I did it?”
Exactly, I wondered that too.
But I couldn’t answer a question with a question. I forced my stalled brain to work and tried to find an answer.
“...As a joke?”
Mumbling with little confidence, Lucien laughed even more.
“That’s right.”
Like declaring to a quiz champion who got the right answer, Lucien suddenly stepped back. Blinking to refocus, I watched as he casually continued.
“Now do you get what I’m saying?”
“...No, not at all.”
I suddenly felt like a fool, but there was nothing I could do. Seeing me needing an explanation quickly, Lucien calmly explained.
“Why what I did isn’t sexual harassment but a joke? Because you and I are friends, right?”
“Oh? Uh, yeah.”
I hurriedly nodded, and he looked at me with a mischievous gaze.
“If you did that to Emilio, what do you think he’d think?”
“Uh...”
I couldn’t answer this time. Seeing me hesitate, Lucien gave the answer for me.
“You might shrug it off as a joke, but it’d be uncomfortable, right? That’s how far away you and Emilio are, you know?”
“Ah...”
Only then did I start to understand what he meant. I asked hastily.
“So you mean I should get close enough so that doing this would still be taken as a joke?”
“That’s right.”
Lucien nodded with a satisfied expression, like a professor approving a scholarship student. I smiled briefly but soon felt helpless.
“How am I supposed to do that? Even now with Emi...”
“Not bad. But shouldn’t you make it better?”
“So, how?”
If I knew how, I’d have done it already. Feeling frustrated not understanding Lucien’s words, I asked, and he tilted his head and said,
“I’ll help you.”
“What?”
The unexpected offer made me blurt out loud. Seeing my wide-open mouth and eyes, Lucien casually added,
“It’s hard to get close to Emilio on your own. So I’ll help.”
I blinked rapidly, but his face looked sincere. Confirming his honesty, my heart grew impatient.
“Uh, how? By what means will you help?”
I asked almost impatiently, but Lucien didn’t seem bothered and answered.
“Well, there are many ways. First, you have to spend more time together, right? Then you’ll talk more, and your relationship will get closer. We can improvise ideas as they come.”
Though his confident words sounded somewhat haphazard, I was overjoyed at the offer to help. I’d never imagined anyone would support my love life. I thought that was only for those who liked the opposite sex. Just the thought of having such encouragement made my heart race with excitement.
“Thanks, even if it’s just words.”
“I mean it.”
Lucien smiled and teasingly added,
“Trust me.”
“Of course I do.”
We smiled at each other. Seeing his smiling face made me feel reassured, but another question arose.
“Why the change?”
Noticing my expression shift, Lucien frowned and asked. I was embarrassed to realize how sensitive he was and scratched the back of my neck.
“Um, didn’t you dislike me getting close to Emi?”
I thought of the time he grabbed and pulled my hair out abruptly, which felt strange. Cautiously, I asked, and he suddenly burst out laughing.
“Yeah, I did then. But that’s old news. I’ve changed my mind.”
Lucien smiled as if he was about to burst with joy and said warmly,
“We’re friends, after all. Of course, I have to help.”
It was a perfectly reasonable answer, but I still couldn’t accept it easily. Could someone really change their attitude so quickly? Does everyone change after experiencing Lurt? Surely pheromones didn’t mess with his brain, right?
Lost in these thoughts, Lucien, who had been quietly watching me, finally spoke.
“I know I was harsh back then.”
“Huh? Uh...”
I answered hesitantly, and he calmly continued.
“I wasn’t good at controlling my emotions, and I was immature. Thinking about it alone, I realized I was wrong. Someone you like and a friend can only be different.”
Lucien gave a wry smile and added,
“But still, we’re still friends, right?”
“Y-yeah, of course.”
I quickly agreed, and Lucien smiled brightly as if that was enough.
“So now can you trust me?”
I hesitated briefly, and he quickly added,
“If you don’t want to, it’s okay to refuse. I just…”
Cutting off his somewhat rushed words, Lucien sighed softly.
“I just wanted to apologize for being harsh back then.”
Seeing him lower his gaze with a gloomy expression, my heart softened immediately. A reprimand echoed in my mind.
If a friend offers to help, you should trust them, why doubt? Lucien was willing to help me out. He had nothing to lose by offering this. He was simply stepping forward to help, and I was acting poorly. That wasn’t good.
Feeling remorse inside, I relaxed my expression and nodded.
“I know, I was just a little surprised since this is all new to me.”
I muttered awkwardly, glancing sideways.
“As you know, I had no one to discuss this kind of thing with. I never imagined anyone would help me...”
“Well, now you have me.”
Before I could finish, Lucien interrupted.
“You can discuss things with me. We can plan all sorts of things about Emilio, how’s that?”
Lucien’s purple eyes sparkled as he looked at me. Then I understood everything. To Lucien, I was his closest and only friend. Maybe he just wanted to play the role of the friend who actively helps with such events.
Thinking that, my guard melted instantly, and I burst out laughing. Lucien laughed too.
“Thanks, but really, I’m fine.”
Politely declining, Lucien immediately looked disappointed.
“You don’t trust me?”
“No, that’s not it.”
I quickly denied.
“I know your feelings well and appreciate it. But this is something I have to do alone. I want it that way for now.”
Leaving matters about someone you like to another person is absurd. Just like my feelings belong only to me, so do all the actions and responsibilities that come with them. I was grateful for Lucien’s heart but couldn’t accept it. Instead, I added to not disappoint him.
“Really, thank you. If you ever like someone, I’ll definitely help then. Oh, only if you want me to.”
Speaking sincerely as never before, Lucien was silent for a moment then nodded willingly.
“Yeah, thanks.”
I smiled and stroked his head. He stared at me intently, grabbed my wrist, and pulled me. The hand that had been stroking my head was caught, and I was pulled into Lucien’s arms again.
Ah, that scent.
Now familiar sweet scent, I breathed in deeply and rubbed Lucien’s back. Who would have thought Lucien would change like this? The image of him rampaging out of jealousy toward Emilio and hitting me felt like a distant dream.
Lurt really does make a person mature.
I thought pheromones were truly a strange thing as I stayed with him.