Tony was doing his absolute best to pretend he had no idea what Peter was hinting at.
But honestly, to miss it, a person would have to be blind, deaf, and on another continent from Peter.
At the same time, Tony also knew that yes, damn it, he was going to buy the kid a dog.
He would buy him anything he asked for.
That was the whole problem: the kid stubbornly could not bring himself to walk up to Tony and ask for something.
Tony would have bought the dog without being asked, of course, but this had been Pepper’s idea.
She thought Peter’s obsession with getting a dog was the perfect opportunity to teach him to ask them directly for what he wanted.
Tony had agreed that it seemed like a pretty good solution.
Except Peter had spent the last two weeks torturing everyone with puppy-related puns and still had not asked.
Tony’s eye was beginning to twitch whenever he heard any variation of the word puppy.
And not only Tony’s.
In the last twelve days, six Avengers had approached him—including Wanda, who seemed to have finally warmed up to him, and Scott, whose presence in the Tower remained completely unexplained—to ask whether Tony might take pity on everyone and buy Peter a dog.
He wanted to!
He wanted to very, very badly.
But Pepper was immovable and only laughed wickedly whenever he complained.
Tony had even attended a founders’ meeting and a symposium on biological synthesis, just to stay away from Peter and his puppy madness.
Even Pepper’s confidence wavered slightly when both she and Tony received messages from MJ and Ned begging them to buy Peter the damn dog.
By then, however, it had become a matter of principle.
*** “I can tell Tony understood the hints,” Peter said, returning to the subject while they sat in the cafeteria.
“Why is he being such a stubborn little puppy?” As though on command, Ned and MJ gave exhausted sighs and dropped their heads into their hands.
They were now seriously considering either storming the Tower and threatening Tony until he bought the damn dog, or tying Peter up and throwing him into the ocean.
Peter, apparently oblivious to his friends’ reactions, continued talking.
“I’m sure Tony himself is puppy-level delighted by such a paw-some idea, but—” “Peter,” Ned interrupted, feeling physically incapable of surviving one more puppy.
“Have you tried simply walking up to him and asking?” Peter shook his head in confusion.
Then he froze in surprise, as though the possibility had never occurred to him.
Which, honestly, it probably had not.
MJ looked hopefully at Ned, praying that their “genius” had finally understood and would make use of the miraculous suggestion.
“Your idea is puppyishly adorable,” Peter said thoughtfully.
Ned and MJ looked at each other and groaned in pain and disappointment.
Definitely tie him up and throw him into the ocean.
*** Peter stumbled into Tony’s laboratory carrying enough food to feed an army and, for once, did not begin firing off puppy puns the moment he crossed the threshold.
That was new.
Without a word, he handed Stark a cup of tea and a plate of casserole.
Tony could practically hear the gears turning in the kid’s head while he tried to figure out how to approach the subject.
Tony was afraid to break the silence first and scare off the possibly reformed child.
A few minutes later, Peter scratched his nose thoughtfully, set his plate aside, and gave Tony a slightly uncertain look.
“You do understand that I want a dog, right?” Tony nodded, fighting desperately not to smile.
Was it finally happening?
Peter relaxed a little and searched for the words to form his next sentence.
“And you aren’t buying one because you want me to ask instead of hinting?” Tony nodded again.
Privately, he made a note to show Peter the definition of the word hint when they had time, because even F.R.I.D.A.Y.
had understood that he wanted a puppy.
Tony continued watching in silence as the kid gathered enough courage to say it.
“Can I have a dog?” Tony nearly shouted with joy.
God, finally!
They had made it!
He allowed a broad smile to spread across his face, and the instant Peter saw it, he gave a delighted squeak and threw his arms around him.
“F.R.I.D.A.Y., tell Pepper he did it and we’re going to get a dog.” Peter was practically bouncing with impatience, and even F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s voice carried unmistakable relief.
“But first, kiddo, I hope you understand the lesson.
When you want something, you can just ask.
There is absolutely no need to drive everyone insane with puns.” “Understood and accepted.” Peter nodded, staring impatiently at Tony.
“Can we go get the dog now?” Tony agreed, and Peter immediately raced toward the elevator, urging Stark along with sarcastic remarks.
Fine.
Tony would remember this and make him pay next time.
For now, it was time to finally get the damn puppy.
Tony had no idea when he himself had started wanting a dog.
Peter probably had that effect on him.
*** Peter talked without pause during the entire drive to the shelter, describing how wonderful, amazing, perfect, and magnificent life in the Tower would become once there was a dog in it.
Tony merely laughed, while Happy watched his boss with a mixture of horror and pride, unable to understand exactly when Tony Stark had become this person.
At the shelter, Peter apparently made it his mission to cuddle everyone.
Tony patiently followed him to every animal introduced with “look at this adorable little sweetheart”—not only dogs, but cats, parrots, hamsters, a ferret, and several snakes.
By Peter’s second lap, Tony was already speaking with Teresa, the shelter owner, giving the kid time to choose.
For some reason, Tony had no doubt that Peter would take the entire shelter home if given the opportunity.
All he could do was wait for the kid to pick someone while Peter began his fourth tour of the building.
Suddenly, Peter stopped beside a husky enclosure and snapped his head up, listening.
Tony could hear nothing, but the kid had enhanced hearing.
Tony and Teresa followed as Peter confidently entered a back room and nearly frightened two employees to death.
Tony’s gaze immediately fixed on the puppy sitting between them.
It was a small, snow-white ball of fur huddled fearfully against the wall.
It looked something like a Samoyed, but it was far too small for the breed.
“Why are you going to put him down?” Peter looked upset and angry.
“There isn’t enough space at the shelter,” the employees answered, glancing at each other as they struggled to respond to the child instead of staring in shock at Tony Stark.
“No one is likely to adopt him, so we don’t have another choice.” “Why wouldn’t anyone adopt him?” Peter’s eyes never left the puppy, which remained pressed against the wall.
“Is something wrong with him?” “He’s too small for his breed,” the man explained, looking sadly at the puppy.
“It’s a genetic condition.
And he’s terrified of people.
Most visitors choose affectionate puppies.” Peter listened distractedly while moving toward the puppy slowly and carefully.
The little animal watched the offered hand with suspicion and sniffed.
Peter whispered something in a soft voice and smiled gently.
Tony already knew what was going to happen.
The puppy crept toward the kid, hesitantly licked his palm, and began wagging its tail.
Peter laughed quietly.
Once the puppy had given permission, he touched the soft fur and scratched behind its ears.
The dog made a happy little growling sound, climbed playfully onto Peter, and began licking his face.
Both employees stared in amazement.
Tony turned toward the shelter owner.
“Well, it looks like we’re taking him.
Where do I sign?” She produced several forms while Peter happily lifted the puppy into his arms, practically purring with joy louder than the dog.
“What are you going to name him?” “Charlie.” Peter smiled when Tony wrinkled his nose.
“I don’t care that you dislike Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.
It’s still great.” “Go away.” Tony rolled his eyes and discreetly slipped a check for a modest amount into the paperwork.
Maybe they could expand the shelter.
When Happy saw the puppy, he immediately began complaining that the entire car would be covered in fur.
Neither Tony nor Peter cared.
They still needed to stop at a pet store and buy the puppy everything he could possibly want.
Charlie sniffed Stark, judged him acceptable, climbed into his lap, and fell asleep.
Looking at Peter, Tony thought that apparently the old saying was true: pets really did resemble their owners.