Peter was profoundly unenthusiastic about the idea, but he did not want to argue with Pepper.
She was wonderful.
Peter simply had approximately one million ideas for things he could do, and none of them included attending a board meeting.
Pepper said he should come to this ‘brain-melting nightmare’ at least once, look at the people involved, and listen to what they actually did.
She wanted him there badly enough that she offered to let him sit through the entire meeting on his phone, the way Tony usually did.
The important thing was for those people to start getting used to him.
Peter desperately wanted to stay with Charlie, but he did not want to disappoint Pepper, so he agreed to attend just this once.
He did not regret it.
Pepper’s delighted smile was worth spending a few hours at some incredibly boring meeting.
The lengths Pepper was willing to go to get him there were almost unbelievable.
She did not insist on formal clothes, even though Tony frequently complained that she threatened him with various forms of violence whenever he refused to wear a tie.
She allowed Peter to sit in an armchair in the corner rather than at the table with everyone else.
In other words, she used forbidden methods of persuasion.
Peter did not tell her that he had agreed the moment she said, “Please come with me.” His instincts said he should.
The slightly hunted expression Pepper wore whenever she mentioned the meeting confirmed it.
Something told him she was not thrilled about the whole thing either.
They arrived early, so Peter settled comfortably into his chair and decided to entertain himself by identifying whoever had been making Pepper’s life miserable.
F.R.I.D.A.Y.
had already sent him information on every member of the board.
Being friends with the world’s most advanced artificial intelligence was incredibly convenient sometimes.
The moment a heavyset man entered the room, Pepper’s smile dimmed.
The information Gorgeous had sent said his name was Edward Vogler.
Apparently he had also experienced ‘disagreements’ at his previous workplace, where he had sat on the board of some hospital.
That was hardly surprising.
Pepper was one of the least confrontational people alive, which meant the problem was definitely Mr.
Vogler.
According to F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s files, his net worth was a little over one hundred million dollars.
Peter doubted his investment was particularly noticeable.
Recently he and Tony had gone slightly overboard buying Charlie toys, a bed, a leash, a ruby-studded collar, and a house in Alaska so he could play in the snow.
Sometimes it was very difficult to stop.
That was not a hundred million, of course, but for Tony or Stark Industries, such a sum probably meant almost nothing.
Peter half listened as the meeting began and several men whispered quietly about him.
Neither Peter nor Pepper responded.
After the recent press conference, only blind people failed to recognize him.
The members of this board should certainly have heard of his humble existence.
The meeting opened with a discussion of something mind-numbingly uninteresting, so Peter simply tried to tune it out, occasionally glancing at Pepper and Vogler.
Pepper looked subdued.
The oversized-baby-looking man smiled while holding several papers.
So he intended to speak.
Fine.
Let’s hear what he had done to annoy Pepper so badly.
Peter decided to message Tony, purely to ask how important Vogler was and whether the ‘Mr.
Stark Method’ could be used on him.
That method consisted of driving someone mad through mockery.
Peter had not yet reached Tony’s level of mastery, but he had learned a few things.
Peter: Puppy greetings!
I’m sitting in a board meeting.
Some guy named Vogler is tormenting Pep.
Tony: Since when are infants allowed in there?
Should I storm in and rescue her?
Peter blinked and reread the last line.
He might have been offended that Tony apparently called him an infant, but he was not entirely certain the message did not refer to Vogler.
The man truly did look like a baby.
There was something more important to address, though.
Peter: You’re in Canada.
Tony: When has that ever stopped me?
So should I storm in?
Peter: No, I’ve got it.
Can I use the MSM?
Tony: First, that abbreviation is disgusting.
Second, go ahead.
I don’t like him anyway.
Peter snorted quietly and reflected that Tony really was cool.
He and Pepper had definitely gotten lucky.
Edward Vogler suddenly rose, and Peter focused completely.
All right.
Show us what you are proposing.
“Good afternoon, esteemed members of the board.
I have discussed this proposal with Ms.
Potts repeatedly, and I am now bringing it before all of you.
Though I had very much hoped Mr.
Stark himself would be present today.
As we all know, over the last several years this company changed direction and ceased manufacturing weapons.
Its products are now highly diverse, ranging from security systems to medical equipment.
At the same time, however, research costs—including the continued development of advanced weapons systems for the Avengers and S.H.I.E.L.D.—have increased several times over, consuming company profit.” Vogler paused so everyone could consider his argument.
Peter frowned.
He could already see where this was going.
“I have taken the liberty of proposing several changes to the company’s operations.
First, I recommend reducing staff.
We all know this is, above all, a high-technology tower.
Perhaps we should make greater use of that technology.
Fewer employees mean fewer medical-insurance costs and lower cafeteria expenses.
Machines also make fewer mistakes than humans, making this highly profitable.
Second, I propose resuming weapons production.
Not necessarily at its former scale, but the United States military, for example, would gladly purchase our newest developments.
Arms sales have always been one of the most profitable forms of business.” He sat down.
Silence filled the room.
Peter watched Pepper frown and could practically hear the other board members thinking.
If they supported the proposal, even Pepper would have to obey.
Peter had read enough about how shareholder votes worked.
But the idea was complete nonsense.
Peter’s instincts alerted him to twenty heads turning sharply in his direction.
Oh.
Had he said that out loud?
“Excuse me, young man, did you say something?” asked a short gray-haired man—Mr.
Harris.
Peter considered pretending he had not, but Pepper was looking at him with such hope that he could not ignore it.
Besides, opportunities like this did not come often.
Perhaps he would not even need the MSM to deal with Vogler.
Well.
Maybe just a little.
Peter rose easily from the chair and stretched.
Those Tony-like mannerisms he had honestly, truly tried not to inherit had apparently settled in anyway.
“I said the idea is nonsense.” Peter permitted himself a small smile.
“First, the part about staff.
Robots are great.
We have a lot of them in the Tower, plus an AI.
And along with them come system failures, server errors, unimaginable energy consumption—even though the Tower runs on an arc reactor—and a tiny little problem called mechanical breakdown as equipment ages.
Robots cannot repair themselves, Mr.
Vogler.
They also cannot invent new solutions to problems or come up with creative ways to optimize processes.
What’s the phrase?
Right.
They lack the human factor.
Only people can create something genuinely new, and that is the entire purpose of this company.
Besides, we couldn’t fire the medical staff even if we wanted to, because the Avengers live in the Tower, and those puppies constantly come back and smear blood over everything.” Perhaps adorable nicknames were not ideal while trying to convince a room full of donkeys that he was right.
Peter paused for a second, but the moment Vogler opened his mouth to object, Peter began talking again.
No one in the room was likely to defeat him in a competition based on continuous speech.
“F.R.I.D.A.Y., show me statistics for the company’s current weapons development and the figures from before Tony’s announcement.” A hologram filled with bars appeared above the center of the table.
“Now put a comparative chart of revenue and expenses from then and now beside it.
Everyone can see that, right?
First, I would like to draw your attention to the fact that current company revenue is thirty-four trillion dollars, against nineteen trillion in expenses.
Huh.
I should tell Tony it’s time to change the slogan on his shirt from ‘billionaire’ to ‘trillionaire.’ And I think everyone can see that revenue from weapons sales was, what, about a thousand times lower?
So, as far as I can tell, not only does the company have no need to add another branch of production, but it could lose an enormous amount of money by doing so.
Research, factory construction, and production of an entirely new weapons line would cost a colossal sum.
Around two trillion, right, Gorgeous?” F.R.I.D.A.Y.
immediately began calculating and displayed a figure.
“There.
F.R.I.D.A.Y.
says weapons production would cost two point seven trillion.
The entire annual budget of the United States Department of Defense is around seven hundred billion.
A loss of two trillion dollars does not fit the definition of ‘profitable business’ particularly well.
Conclusion: the idea is nonsense.” “We could sell weapons to customers besides the United States military,” Vogler immediately argued.
Peter rolled his eyes.
“I’m sorry, but how exactly do you intend to convince Tony?
Pepper and I think your idea is nonsense, and Tony will hate it even more.” Peter exhaled tiredly, imagining what Tony might do.
“Listen, Mr.
Vogler.
You have already driven Pepper crazy, and Tony does not like that.
I’m sixteen.
I have read three books on business management, and I just dismantled your entire proposal.
How about you stop clinging to a terrible idea before someone removes you from the board?” Peter smiled sweetly, enjoying the confusion on everyone’s faces perhaps a little too much.
Pepper looked as though she was fighting desperately not to smile.
Well, what had they expected?
He was Tony Stark’s son.
Maybe board meetings were not so terrible after all.
Peter put in his earbuds, assuming no one would want his participation for a while, and began typing.
Peter: I was awesome.
Tony: I expected nothing less.
Peter: You’re a trillionaire, by the way.
Time to change the line on the shirt.
Tony: Not bad.
So are you, by the way.
Peter smiled.
Damn.
He had not thought of that.
In that case, he needed to buy a lifetime Netflix subscription.
Assuming such a thing existed.
********************************************************************************************************* Edward Vogler is a reference to himself in the television series House, M.D.
He terrorized House there and was also a board member nobody liked.